Struggling with ABDL being a Christian. Support needed

[Sealander]

I think part of the problem is that we don't understand God. I certainly don't. The historical church sees God as a father and that makes God a person, at least seen in our human terms. Hollywood is even worse. But I think God is a force and one that believes in balance. Think about how the universe works: how we work. Our bodies in order to live, must have balance, especially in terms of our own chemistry. The universe needs balance, gravitational pulls balancing one object against another, molecules balancing between protons, neutrons and electrons.

So I don't think God intends for us to hate ourselves unless we've done something terribly wrong, something that upsets the balance like taking another live. Even if you feel bad about wearing and using diapers, you can balance it off by doing something nice for someone else. The teachings of Christ is all about caring for others and that includes caring for yourself. I lived with a lot of guilt when I was a teenager and in college. All it did was make me depressed. Life and living is so much bigger than diapers. Good people, I think, get to wear diapers if that's what they want.

Thanks for your thoughts and perspective. I'll go back to the Gospels and try to read them with fresh eyes. I'll be honest, I see things as being more complicated. It doesn't seem to be an accident or misunderstanding that Christianity has had a robust ascetical tradition. The groundwork is all there in the Gospels, alongside and within a call to love others and ourselves. (I want to be clear that I'm just sharing the impressions of a troubled young man. I don't presume to tell anyone what Christianity is, just trying to communicate the bind I feel myself in.)

We're urged to take up our cross daily and follow him. On the other hand, it's said that if we do we'll find the yoke easy and the burden light. So what if I try and I don't find it that way? I don't know. I guess that means something has gone wrong. Maybe I picked up the wrong cross!

I appreciate the statement that life is so much bigger than diapers.

 

[Edgewater]

Thanks for your thoughts and perspective. I'll go back to the Gospels and try to read them with fresh eyes. I'll be honest, I see things as being more complicated. It doesn't seem to be an accident or misunderstanding that Christianity has had a robust ascetical tradition. The groundwork is all there in the Gospels, alongside and within a call to love others and ourselves. (I want to be clear that I'm just sharing the impressions of a troubled young man. I don't presume to tell anyone what Christianity is, just trying to communicate the bind I feel myself in.)

We're urged to take up our cross daily and follow him. On the other hand, it's said that if we do we'll find the yoke easy and the burden light. So what if I try and I don't find it that way? I don't know. I guess that means something has gone wrong. Maybe I picked up the wrong cross!

I appreciate the statement that life is so much bigger than diapers.

When one reads from the simple point of Love, the complicated disappears.

 

[Sealander]

When one reads from the simple point of Love, the complicated disappears.

Well, perhaps then I've never managed to do that!

 

[KechoDrips]

I grew up very religious. I find that looking back on that time, the "church" and religion itself engages in a lot of gaslighting (for lack of a better term). Love is used to control, fear of death is used to confine and ritual is used to enslave (again, for lack of a better term).

One of the best things that happened to me was taking a break from it all. Weekly rituals make it very difficult to gain a perspective about life or morality outside of the one that religion provides. Taking a break gives you an actual chance to breathe and contemplate. For someone growing up in a religion and being very guided by it, it can be a very difficult task to come to grips with what it means to forge your own path through life, one that isn't handed down by a deity.

Ultimately, don't take what I (or anyone) say(s) as absolute truth. Figure out what you need to do to make sure you are happy with how your life is lived. If religion brings you that, then lean into it. If religion makes you miserable, just know that there is a lot more to life that can be discovered.

 

[Sealander]

One of the best things that happened to me was taking a break from it all. Weekly rituals make it very difficult to gain a perspective about life or morality outside of the one that religion provides. Taking a break gives you an actual chance to breathe and contemplate. For someone growing up in a religion and being very guided by it, it can be a very difficult task to come to grips with what it means to forge your own path through life, one that isn't handed down by a deity.

Thanks for your thoughts.

I grew up in a pretty average--which is to say not-really-practicing and not-very-seriously-believing--Catholic family. I became an atheist when I was in middle school but then attended a Catholic high school where I got to know the faith and its history better. I decided to revert when I was in college, partly in response to an existential crisis of sorts. So I wound up Catholic not so much by being raised in it (though I was kinda raised in it) as by attraction. I am where I am because I wanted to be here. The strictures have accordingly been self-imposed, and I'm familiar with what it's like to live without them, because I did it for certain very formative years of my life.

Ultimately, don't take what I (or anyone) say(s) as absolute truth. Figure out what you need to do to make sure you are happy with how your life is lived. If religion brings you that, then lean into it. If religion makes you miserable, just know that there is a lot more to life that can be discovered.

Yeah, this is basically what has effected my current distance from my faith. I find it hard to deny that it was making me miserable, and I realize there's a way to live which is not miserable. I see it as a tension between the ascetical norms characteristic of traditional Christianity and the therapeutic norms of self-care which are prominent these days.

 

[Sealander]

By the way, everyone, thank you really for sharing your thoughts and perspectives. I hope I'm not coming across as dense or difficult or unwilling to help myself.

 

[Edgewater]

May you find your way and may it bring you comfort.

 

[UnderTheRadar]

If wearing and using diapers doesn't ultimately separate you from God, then by definition, it isn't a sin.

There are things that are not sin which becomes sin if the person believes themselves to be defying God... For instance... I drink alcohol... I know scriptures do not call it sin. But, if I believe it to be sin and choose to drink even though I believe it to be sin then I AM sinning... Not because I drink, but because I'm my heart I am willfully defiant... Likewise, if something rules me, rather than me ruling it, then it becomes an idol in my heart, taking the rightful place of God...

 

[TeddyBearCowboy]

I agree with what many here have said, in that the question is whether or not wearing a diaper or being ABDL distances you from God? If so, then there is a problem. As God would want you to come unto Him, regardless of your sins or of your circumstance.

Jesus did not just associate with those who were righteous, rather, he found more success with sinners who humbled themselves before Him as many of those who professed to be righteous were puffed up in pride and did not accept Him.

Christ said, “Verily I say unto you, Except ye be converted, and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven.” King James Version Matthew 18:3.

While I don’t think He is referring to being ABDL, it is the childlike qualities that He shares we should have to become close to Him. Being childlike as an ABDL, being humble, and innocent, and relying on Him is a quality of being that I believe is part of the substance of being little.

Pornography and sexual deviation is not the same as the innocence that is referred to here. However, if one finds sorrow and repentance of these things, it may lead to a greater closeness with Him than those who may not have struggled with such but in their own pride humble not themselves.

I heard a talk bit long ago about whether if you are struggling with sorrow for your sins if God is even with you because you sinned. But the suggested answer that God must be with you still as the fact that you felt sorrow for your mistakes is evidence God is with you still for if not, why would you feel bad that you may have erred?

Anyhow, sorry for the monologue. My response in short is that being DL or ABDL is not a sin. It rather is part of ourselves that was made not by ourself, and if not by ourself, this must be something that was created in us. Hence, that is not a sin. Rather, it must be for a purpose and we should turn to the creator not in shame, but to understand why.

I know that many folks who might read this do not share in these views, and that is okay. I’m just sharing my own point of view for the OP and others who might sincerely be asking themselves this question.

 

[InkoBubi]

If god would exist he would embrace and love you. It's the human being that hurt you. It's religion who tries to manipulate people and feel them guilty.
Be proud and happy!

 

[TeeMousy]

Anyhow, sorry for the monologue. My response in short is that being DL or ABDL is not a sin. It rather is part of ourselves that was made not by ourself, and if not by ourself, this must be something that was created in us. Hence, that is not a sin. Rather, it must be for a purpose and we should turn to the creator not in shame, but to understand why.

I agree with most everything you said. I'm just a little hung up on the part about it being something that was created in me. To me it feels more like the ABDL part is a response to a genuine need that was created in me, not the ABDL itself. Regardless, I agree we should turn the creator for understanding. It will not surprise him. He already knows everything about us, and wants us to talk to him.

 

[Sealander]

Jesus did not just associate with those who were righteous, rather, he found more success with sinners who humbled themselves before Him as many of those who professed to be righteous were puffed up in pride and did not accept Him.

Pornography and sexual deviation is not the same as the innocence that is referred to here. However, if one finds sorrow and repentance of these things, it may lead to a greater closeness with Him than those who may not have struggled with such but in their own pride humble not themselves.

My response in short is that being DL or ABDL is not a sin. It rather is part of ourselves that was made not by ourself, and if not by ourself, this must be something that was created in us. Hence, that is not a sin. Rather, it must be for a purpose and we should turn to the creator not in shame, but to understand why.

I appreciate your post, as someone who has difficulty with this. I will say though—I don’t think it’s enough to point out that this is not a part of us that was made by ourselves. That may be enough to show that having ABDL desires is not a sin, but we human beings find ourselves with lots of desires that we did not give ourselves and yet on which we should not act. Maybe we should always say: having the desire is not sin, but for some desires, acting on it is. So we need some independent reason for thinking that there’s nothing wrong with acting on ABDL desires.

I’d likewise agree that having this struggle might be an occasion for growing in closeness to God. There is, after all, the example of St. Augustine. Jesus may be especially close to those who struggled with sin. But perhaps still he means to say to us what he said to the woman caught in adultery: “Go and sin no more.”

So we are led back again to the question of what is sin.

 

[Unorthodoxengineer]

With all that's going on in the world, I doubt God would be worried by something that harms nobody, but brings reassurance and often mental wellbeing to many.

IMHO it's the total opposite of 'sinful'.

 

[Labrador]

Not sure if OP is still watching this thread, but anyway….
I have never struggled with this being a sin, but I do have anxiety. So I have no judgement whatsoever for people who are troubled by such things. My mind will dwell on far weirder, far more insignificant questions.
For me, diapers are more than underwear but less that an obsession. When I wear then, I find it easier to be quiet and listen, live and experience creation. When I’ve pondered the question, I can’t think of any reason why it would be. Like others have said, if it draws you away from God, that would be sinful.
I would contemplate why you believe this to be sinful. Is there a solid reason? Or is it just something that bothers you endlessly despite any confidence you may have to the contrary.
Like I said, I know about anxiety—it’s a powerful thing!

 

[PaddyPamps]

I wish it were that easy, my whole life people tell me it’s the devil

I wouldn't worry much about heaven, he'll or sinning. Every religion is just as much true as another, chances are everyone is wrong.

Don't let religion or religious communities control your life or you'll always live with doubt and shame.

So long as you're not evil I sure you'll be fine. Surely God's got some other issues than being concerned if you pee your pants for fun.

 

[Hemix]

Christianity is ambiguous and contradictory, even catechists state hell don't exist, but it's rather Earth itself. I don't believe on Pablo Tarso's cult anymore and I see religions are sects sharing traits with each other, as old as Isis' mysteries and even the cult to the Sun.

Nevertheless, what I've learned is that all is basically reduced to the following rule here: love thy neighbor as thou'st love thyself.

As long as thou followest that rule, there's nothing to worry about.

 

[foxkits]

I'm so saddened that I was Baptist growing up I rejected the church because if that was God I wanted no part of it. Then I asked God a question. And the truth was given to me . You will have to discover for your self that's why Christ couldn't tell you how things are he only pointed the way. Anything that talk of love kindness compassion.
You contrate to much on sin.
Not what good or the good you can do. God says we are too hard on ourselves. Please be kind to yourself. God wants no one to suffer. I feel God the most loving being not what everyone says God is. Go with in that's where you will find him. It's so sad you think God is separate from you. That's not the case.

 

[BobbiSueEllen]

I don't care about "The Church" anymore. To Hell with them. For an institution of salvation, they sure institutionalized it: they put themselves right back in the Dark Ages, willingly...and are still riding high on the trailing-edge hangover of Manifest Destiny and "How 'Great' We Art". Since then, we've seen women don men's clothing, take jobs, take leadership roles, which are supposed to be sins...like men being 'effeminate'. Waving people into 'The Fold' with one hand, pointing an accusing finger at them with the other...with a third hand out seeking money. McReligion.

Don't feel bad about wearing/using diapers...or even Going Baby with it. Do it if ya want; be comfy, be content and carry on. In the end, all ya got is your best friend Jesus anyway. And last I heard, he's a rebel, too. Remember the temple marketplace?

 

[TenaciousDL]

"Unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven”. Nuff said.

 

[BobbiSueEllen]

"Unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven”. Nuff said.

That's been destroyed by CSI "King Baby"...it was used in the episode and that left an indelible, weaponized mark on the Witch Hunt Camp of the Muggles. Gotta let use of that one go.