First post. Looking for support to help cope with IC

[PTSDSurvivor413]

Hey there!

I’ll try to be brief. Bedwetter on and off when I was young and then it would happen during high stress moments. Fast forward to a few years ago. I was jumped and sexually assaulted by two men outside of the hotel I was staying at for work. I was a virgin at the time because it was something I wanted to share with husband (if I ever got the chance). Sexually molested as a child, which makes sense for the bed wetting.

This is the struggle I have now. I get severe pain down below from the injuries. I also can barely tell when I need to use the restroom, the feeling is so fair and subtle I almost have to be thinking about it all the time. In times of flashbacks (from PTSD) I usually have an accident. Or during panic and anxiety attacks. I go back and forth between wearing diapers and not. I sleep much better at night if I wear a diaper to bed. I’m less stressed and anxious during the day when I wear a diaper during the day.

It’s just hard for me to be ok with wearing diapers for IC that’s situational. Also, it’s gotten to the point if I’m not padded up during the day I won’t drink liquids and I become dehydrated. I stay hydrated when I have a diaper on. And honestly I don’t focus on trying so hard to feel the urge then I just wet automatically in them without knowing half the time.

With all of this, I just feel embarrassed and ashamed I can’t figure it out. Or cannot be at peace with accepting maybe it’s time to just commit to 24/7 wearing and deal with the weird and horrible comments I get from family when I’m around them.

Anyways. That’s what is on my mind currently. Have a great night ya’ll!

 

[StarryNight]

Hello and welcome to the community. Thank you for that introduction. I'm sorry for all you have been through. I'm not IC but others here are. I hope this community can be a support for you. And there is nothing to be ashamed about wearing absorbent underwear.

 

[Cottontail]

Welcome, @PTSDSurvivor413. Whoa. I'm so sorry to hear about what happened to you! I hope we can be worthy supporters. I don't exactly have any great advice on the "to wear, or not to wear" thing. There's obviously a lot of really personal stuff involved in a decision like that. Dehydration and anxiety don't sound great though, and I would certainly hope that your friends and family could accept a decision made in the interest of your physical and mental well-being, particularly in light of what you went through. Put another way, I hope the "weird and horrible comments" are you over-worrying and not anything that would actually happen. Best wishes!

 

[Edgewater]

As an individual that is fully, 24/7, U-IC (urinary-Incontinent), I know that many of us on the Incontinent forum can help regarding what to wear as it would appear that is one of your needs /concerns.

The Incontinent World is wide and covers many reasons one can be Incontinent as there is a mix of physical and mental causes, many seem to be a mix of both. As a result, what you are defining fits that realm of both.

Please do not allow yourself to become dehydrated as that can cause many different problems and as you have likely seen, really does not assure being dry as our systems has to remove the contaminated as to allow its replacement with the fresh.

Point being that there are many here that can understand what you are facing and provide help!

Accepting that you 'need' to wear diapers is the first step in this process!

But first, Welcome and be Welcomed to this amazing World of ADISC!
A truly unique place as near everyone here is likely wearing a diaper!
Enjoy!

 

[Eclectic]

Getting ready for bed and then I read your post. Now I’m mad. I can’t comprehend how any human can do that to another human. I hope you have sought therapy or have close friends that you can confide in. I’m so sorry that happened

I am however glad you joined as there are quite a few of us who suffer from some form of incontinence. Please don’t feel embarrassed or ashamed for something you have little control over. It took me a long time to accept my need for diapers to manage my urge incontinence. It didn’t help that my parents and siblings shamed me for wearing them when I was younger.

Welcome aboard and I hope we can all help each other.

 

[Tigercub59]

Welcome

 

[MrDiaperLoverUK]

Hey there!

I’ll try to be brief. Bedwetter on and off when I was young and then it would happen during high stress moments. Fast forward to a few years ago. I was jumped and sexually assaulted by two men outside of the hotel I was staying at for work. I was a virgin at the time because it was something I wanted to share with husband (if I ever got the chance). Sexually molested as a child, which makes sense for the bed wetting.

This is the struggle I have now. I get severe pain down below from the injuries. I also can barely tell when I need to use the restroom, the feeling is so fair and subtle I almost have to be thinking about it all the time. In times of flashbacks (from PTSD) I usually have an accident. Or during panic and anxiety attacks. I go back and forth between wearing diapers and not. I sleep much better at night if I wear a diaper to bed. I’m less stressed and anxious during the day when I wear a diaper during the day.

It’s just hard for me to be ok with wearing diapers for IC that’s situational. Also, it’s gotten to the point if I’m not padded up during the day I won’t drink liquids and I become dehydrated. I stay hydrated when I have a diaper on. And honestly I don’t focus on trying so hard to feel the urge then I just wet automatically in them without knowing half the time.

With all of this, I just feel embarrassed and ashamed I can’t figure it out. Or cannot be at peace with accepting maybe it’s time to just commit to 24/7 wearing and deal with the weird and horrible comments I get from family when I’m around them.

Anyways. That’s what is on my mind currently. Have a great night ya’ll!

Firstly Hello and Welcome to this site from the United Kingdom and secondly I’m so sorry to read your introduction about that you was sexually assaulted by 2 men and I hope the police have got those 2 in jail and sent to court and the judge throw the book at them behind bars for what they did to you. We are all with you and support you with open arms on what you are going through.

 

[PadPhilosopher]

I am so sorry. I have shed actual tears at what you had to experience. You tried to do everything right, in spite of some creep who damaged you as a child, and then 2 more creeps who damaged you on several more levels. They took something very precious from you, and left you physically injured. It's hard not to hate men like that. But, I'm guessing that you, like me, know Him Who heals our hurts, and that He is helping you in this time of need. I will be praying for you.

Now more than ever, you need to take care of yourself. You need solid sleep. You need to stay hydrated. You need to not feel constantly afraid you're going to wet your pants. @hbic60 fought wearing just the same way, and found he was much healthier and happier just wearing diapers and taking care of his body, and no one cared.

After your experience, and the resulting injuries, anyone who would criticize you for wearing diapers to reclaim as much normalcy in your life as you can, is simply not worthy of your consideration. That doesn't mean people might not say hurtful things, but you have to do what is best for you. I suggest that, at least for now, you need to wear diapers, yes, 24/7. Most people will never know, and you'll be so much healthier. In fact, any road to not needing them likely lies in using them, giving your mind and body a safe time to heal without worrying about being embarrassed and inconvenienced by your bladder.

As someone who is not IC, but has worn 24/7 for months at a time, and is months into doing so now, I can say with confidence that once you get products and a routine that work for you, it's not a big deal at all. In fact, I find it's much easier than running for the bathroom all the time, which is why I do it. (I'm neither AB, nor DL.) No one knows, and no one cares. You have a legitimate need, and you owe it to yourself to meet it, so that you can have the best life possible.

Please keep us posted. You came to the right place for support. We are all wishing you the very best.

 

[PTSDSurvivor413]

Good morning everyone! I barely slept last night because I’m assuming from not wearing a diaper. But after reading all your support and comfort I did my best to fight the tears and shame and I put a diaper on this morning. After it was on, I could feel all my pelvic floor muscles and tension release. Some of the pain decreased as well. Tension in my thighs releases. I had absolutely no idea it was all tense till it relaxed. TMI but all of the sudden I had a gush and FULL bladder void. Had no idea I had to even go that bad. Went and took care of the dogs and cried a bit changing into a new one. (I wet my pants once when I was 8, so my parent took me outside and stripped me of my clothes and hosed me down. Then I had to sit at the kitchen table and had to air dry bare bones until I could go get clothes on). Thank the Lord, when my mom got home. She snuck me into a room and quick put a diaper on me nicely so I didn’t have to worry the rest of the day. Otherwise it was never allowed.

So I think a lot of shame and discomfort comes from that. But at this moment, I do have a diaper on and relaxing with my pup (boxer ). Drinking water as well. Left kidney pain started which I know it means I’m too dehydrated.

I can technically hold it. Most of the time. I just can’t fully focus on anything else in case I miss the very faint signal I have to pee. And that’s after not realizing I was holding it for hours.

So with everything going on. You guys think it’s ok or should I wear a diaper once in awhile to take breaks? What do you guys honestly suggest? I was raised by a marine so I have a lot of grit and can deal with a lot of discomfort. So it’s hard for my brain to comprehend it at times.

It’s almost like if I had someone with experience in this say “hey let’s do this, and then reevaluate in a month” lol. I laugh because I feel I need a doctors note or something.

Appreciate you all more than you know! If I over shared please let me know. I would hate to make someone uncomfortable. Or if my notes become a burden I’m ok with someone pointing that out too.

And yes to @PadPhilosopher , I am a God fearing woman. He is the only reason I’m still alive today.

Have a blessed day everyone! Don’t forget, March Madness is on!! I’m rooting for Purdue(part of Big ten) or if they lose to NC State, then rooting for NC state as they are the underdog!!

Oh. One more thing. The diapers I do have are Tylables and Northshore. Those are the only two brands I have found that only give me a little diaper rash instead of my whole area being on fire

 

[PTSDSurvivor413]

Hello and welcome to the community. Thank you for that introduction. I'm sorry for all you have been through. I'm not IC but others here are. I hope this community can be a support for you. And there is nothing to be ashamed about wearing absorbent underwear.

I wish absorbent underwear/pull ups worked for me. Just have leaked to many times because I can’t get the fit I want like I can with the tab ones. Thank you for welcoming me!

 

[PTSDSurvivor413]

Getting ready for bed and then I read your post. Now I’m mad. I can’t comprehend how any human can do that to another human. I hope you have sought therapy or have close friends that you can confide in. I’m so sorry that happened

I am however glad you joined as there are quite a few of us who suffer from some form of incontinence. Please don’t feel embarrassed or ashamed for something you have little control over. It took me a long time to accept my need for diapers to manage my urge incontinence. It didn’t help that my parents and siblings shamed me for wearing them when I was younger.

Welcome aboard and I hope we can all help each other.

Welcome, @PTSDSurvivor413. Whoa. I'm so sorry to hear about what happened to you! I hope we can be worthy supporters. I don't exactly have any great advice on the "to wear, or not to wear" thing. There's obviously a lot of really personal stuff involved in a decision like that. Dehydration and anxiety don't sound great though, and I would certainly hope that your friends and family could accept a decision made in the interest of your physical and mental well-being, particularly in light of what you went through. Put another way, I hope the "weird and horrible comments" are you over-worrying and not anything that would actually happen. Best wishes!

I wish the comments were in my head. The most recent example, I’m recovering from mono currently. And a week ago, a really good friend of mine (also a nurse) came over early in the morning to check on me. I was super sick and worn out. She also is one of the few that knows my background. She helped me get freshened up and she wrapped me up in a diaper and I fell asleep almost immediately. Woke up six hours later and a family member came to drop off some food. Forgetting I had a full sag going on. He noticed it, gabbed it, and said “how can you not hold your liquids,” go change. I’m in my 30s, and felt so awful after that.

 

[Fireball44]

I wish absorbent underwear/pull ups worked for me. Just have leaked to many times because I can’t get the fit I want like I can with the tab ones. Thank you for welcoming me!

love pullups--prevail brand. Very thin, form fitting, Very asorbant i change every 5 hours, and wear rubber pants over them when sleeeping on my sides. I love the feel of damp panties or pads.

 

[PadPhilosopher]

Good morning everyone! I barely slept last night because I’m assuming from not wearing a diaper. But after reading all your support and comfort I did my best to fight the tears and shame and I put a diaper on this morning. After it was on, I could feel all my pelvic floor muscles and tension release. Some of the pain decreased as well. Tension in my thighs releases. I had absolutely no idea it was all tense till it relaxed. TMI but all of the sudden I had a gush and FULL bladder void. Had no idea I had to even go that bad. Went and took care of the dogs and cried a bit changing into a new one. (I wet my pants once when I was 8, so my parent took me outside and stripped me of my clothes and hosed me down. Then I had to sit at the kitchen table and had to air dry bare bones until I could go get clothes on). Thank the Lord, when my mom got home. She snuck me into a room and quick put a diaper on me nicely so I didn’t have to worry the rest of the day. Otherwise it was never allowed.

So I think a lot of shame and discomfort comes from that. But at this moment, I do have a diaper on and relaxing with my pup (boxer ). Drinking water as well. Left kidney pain started which I know it means I’m too dehydrated.

I can technically hold it. Most of the time. I just can’t fully focus on anything else in case I miss the very faint signal I have to pee. And that’s after not realizing I was holding it for hours.

So with everything going on. You guys think it’s ok or should I wear a diaper once in awhile to take breaks? What do you guys honestly suggest? I was raised by a marine so I have a lot of grit and can deal with a lot of discomfort. So it’s hard for my brain to comprehend it at times.

It’s almost like if I had someone with experience in this say “hey let’s do this, and then reevaluate in a month” lol. I laugh because I feel I need a doctors note or something.

Appreciate you all more than you know! If I over shared please let me know. I would hate to make someone uncomfortable. Or if my notes become a burden I’m ok with someone pointing that out too.

And yes to @PadPhilosopher , I am a God fearing woman. He is the only reason I’m still alive today.

Have a blessed day everyone! Don’t forget, March Madness is on!! I’m rooting for Purdue(part of Big ten) or if they lose to NC State, then rooting for NC state as they are the underdog!!

Oh. One more thing. The diapers I do have are Tylables and Northshore. Those are the only two brands I have found that only give me a little diaper rash instead of my whole area being on fire

Your desire to be tactful in your presentation is wonderful, and no part of it was TMI. In order to get advice relevant to your situation, you have to be forthcoming about what your situation really is. I'm devastated that you've had to endure so much trauma, but grateful that you know how to lean on He Who can sustain you. He is good!

I think you've confirmed Dr. Mediocrites' (me ) diagnosis that you need to wear 24/7 for awhile. Consider this your doctor's note. I understand the shame you're feeling, which is itself a trauma response, but I think you need to push through it and give your body the break it needs. Continually being dehydrated, tensed, and fearful of wetting yourself is going to damage you far more than relaxing and allowing yourself some space to heal in body and mind. You are clearly fearful of becoming diaper dependent, which is understandable, but I am concerned that you may cause additional damage to your body in trying to avoid it, such that you actually make things worse and, in the long run, cause it. I like the idea of wear 24/7 for a month and then reevaluate. I also like that you have already found products that work for you. You're already prepared for what you need to do.

There is no inherent shame in wearing a diaper. You have a legitimate need, far greater than you are perhaps recognizing. The fact that people have been cruel to you about it in the past is a result of their own insecurities, not anything inherent with you or wearing diapers. Cruel people will find a way to be cruel, sadly, as you too well know. Use your grit to fight their mental oppression and make the choices that are truly best for you, not the ones you think will get you the least criticism.

I'll be praying for you, as I said. Seek His Wisdom and comfort. We're all cheering for you to feel comfortable in your own skin again soon.

 

[Fireball44]

Hey there!

I’ll try to be brief. Bedwetter on and off when I was young and then it would happen during high stress moments. Fast forward to a few years ago. I was jumped and sexually assaulted by two men outside of the hotel I was staying at for work. I was a virgin at the time because it was something I wanted to share with husband (if I ever got the chance). Sexually molested as a child, which makes sense for the bed wetting.

This is the struggle I have now. I get severe pain down below from the injuries. I also can barely tell when I need to use the restroom, the feeling is so fair and subtle I almost have to be thinking about it all the time. In times of flashbacks (from PTSD) I usually have an accident. Or during panic and anxiety attacks. I go back and forth between wearing diapers and not. I sleep much better at night if I wear a diaper to bed. I’m less stressed and anxious during the day when I wear a diaper during the day.

It’s just hard for me to be ok with wearing diapers for IC that’s situational. Also, it’s gotten to the point if I’m not padded up during the day I won’t drink liquids and I become dehydrated. I stay hydrated when I have a diaper on. And honestly I don’t focus on trying so hard to feel the urge then I just wet automatically in them without knowing half the time.

With all of this, I just feel embarrassed and ashamed I can’t figure it out. Or cannot be at peace with accepting maybe it’s time to just commit to 24/7 wearing and deal with the weird and horrible comments I get from family when I’m around them.

Anyways. That’s what is on my mind currently. Have a great night ya’ll!

.

 

[PadPhilosopher]

I wish the comments were in my head. The most recent example, I’m recovering from mono currently. And a week ago, a really good friend of mine (also a nurse) came over early in the morning to check on me. I was super sick and worn out. She also is one of the few that knows my background. She helped me get freshened up and she wrapped me up in a diaper and I fell asleep almost immediately. Woke up six hours later and a family member came to drop off some food. Forgetting I had a full sag going on. He noticed it, gabbed it, and said “how can you not hold your liquids,” go change. I’m in my 30s, and felt so awful after that.

You may need to distance yourself from some toxic family members. That is cruel beyond belief. They, not you, should feel shame.

 

[PTSDSurvivor413]

Getting ready for bed and then I read your post. Now I’m mad. I can’t comprehend how any human can do that to another human. I hope you have sought therapy or have close friends that you can confide in. I’m so sorry that happened

I am however glad you joined as there are quite a few of us who suffer from some form of incontinence. Please don’t feel embarrassed or ashamed for something you have little control over. It took me a long time to accept my need for diapers to manage my urge incontinence. It didn’t help that my parents and siblings shamed me for wearing them when I was younger.

Welcome aboard and I hope we can all help each other.

Welcome, @PTSDSurvivor413. Whoa. I'm so sorry to hear about what happened to you! I hope we can be worthy supporters. I don't exactly have any great advice on the "to wear, or not to wear" thing. There's obviously a lot of really personal stuff involved in a decision like that. Dehydration and anxiety don't sound great though, and I would certainly hope that your friends and family could accept a decision made in the interest of your physical and mental well-being, particularly in light of what you went through. Put another way, I hope the "weird and horrible comments" are you over-worrying and not anything that would actually happen. Best wishes!

I wish the comments were in my head. The most recent example, I’m recovering from mono currently. And a week ago, a really good friend of mine (also a nurse) came over early in the morning to check on me. I was super sick and worn out. She also is one of the few that knows my background. She helped me get freshened up and she wrapped me up in a diaper and I fell asleep almost immediately. Woke up six hours later and a family member came to drop off some food. Forgetting I had a full sag going on. He noticed it, gabbed it, and said “how can you not hold your liquids,” go change. I’m in my 30s, and felt so awful after that

 

[PTSDSurvivor413]

.

I’m new to the site. What does (.) mean? Is that a common response people use for another meaning?

 

[PadPhilosopher]

I’m new to the site. What does (.) mean? Is that a common response people use for another meaning?

In this case, it was edited (probably by a mod) to remove a highly insensitive remark you definitely didn't need to see. The poster is notorious that way......

 

[PadPhilosopher]

@PTSDSurvivor413 Be careful what you read on this site. There is a lot of fetish content that I think will be unhelpful in your efforts to accept wearing diapers to meet your need. It may reinforce the feeling of "diapers are weird" that cruel people have given you. There are places I won't go, even though I'm comfortable in diapers, because I find it too weird. On the other hand, it could also serve to normalize wearing, seeing that others actually enjoy wearing diapers. I don't know you well enough to say for certain, but I feel like cautioning you.

 

[StarryNight]

I wish absorbent underwear/pull ups worked for me. Just have leaked to many times because I can’t get the fit I want like I can with the tab ones. Thank you for welcoming me!

In my mind diapers are also just absorbent underwear. Others have already said better than my self the importance of taking care of yourself. I'm sorry that you have to deal with very rude, disrespectful family members. You should definitely not feel ashamed over your bodies needed to wear. Remember the community is here for you .