Can my wife change my diaper in a family restroom?

[MrGnome]

It’s not about being legal or not. It what is moraly the right thing to do. Some people have no morals, it’s all about them. And if you have to attack someone because They don’t agree with you then please leave.

He has a right to his opinion!

 

[ARBBB2]

OMG people what the hell is wrong with this country, its a bathroom! it's for private family use, you will be in and out faster than if you were to change yourself,,, holy smokes people, e are getting so anal in this country, it's a bathroom for more of a private setting and diapers are very private, go for it!!!! And the hell with all the tree lovers!!!

 

[Eman100]

A Bathroom is a bathroom(Incredibles reference). Do what you want regardless of what others say. Don’t mind what we say on here people just get offended easily and take things out of proportion. You are alright sir It’s better if this is a supportive community anyway so let’s support each other.

 

[Honeywell6180]

You and your wife are family members. If you wear diapers in public, for what ever reason, regardless of whether it is being used as a pressure garment, or for incontinence, you would be considered as a "special needs" individual by law. Since you and your wife are using a family restroom, each of you are part of that family, and you have special needs due to circumstances that necessitate the diapers for some reason or other, I see no problem with having your wife going in to assist you. There are adults helping other adults who are handicapped in those types of restrooms all the time.

 

[BigKid25]

Folks, I'm as conservative as they come, but there are no legal issues in having someone go into a family restroom with you to change your pants.

I've done it dozens of times with my nanny in tow ... at malls, at Target stores, wherever there's been a family restroom available.

If you go in and trash the restroom, or if you go in and have a wild party, people are bound to complain. Changing a wet diaper takes 3 minutes tops. The only problem we've ever encountered is other families waiting to get in. They weren't there when we went in, and we locked the door. We might attract a look or two as we leave, but there's nothing - no recrimination, no legal risk, nothing - beyond that point.

The real problem is the relative scarcity of family restrooms.

This sums up my thoughts exactly.

I understand being cautious and considerate. Hell, I don't even wear to work or school and RARELY wear out in public, if ever. But this is starting to become ridiculous. Legal issues for using a family restroom? Maybe me living in a Liberal state has spoiled me with assuming that people have bigger things to deal with and fret about than using a family restroom to change a diaper. But I have a hard time thinking that someone who raises a fuss over a person using a bathroom for its intended purpose then leaving respectfully should be given any attention.

Would I do it? Eh, not really. I don't have a SO and I don't wear in public often. The car idea is preferable. But seriously, let's not start fear mongering unnecessarily people.

 

[MrGnome]

This sums up my thoughts exactly.

I understand being cautious and considerate. Hell, I don't even wear to work or school and RARELY wear out in public, if ever. But this is starting to become ridiculous. Legal issues for using a family restroom? Maybe me living in a Liberal state has spoiled me with assuming that people have bigger things to deal with and fret about than using a family restroom to change a diaper. But I have a hard time thinking that someone who raises a fuss over a person using a bathroom for its intended purpose then leaving respectfully should be given any attention.

Would I do it? Eh, not really. I don't have a SO and I don't wear in public often. The car idea is preferable. But seriously, let's not start fear mongering unnecessarily people.

Unfortunately changing in the car can get you indecent exposure if a cop wants to be a dick. I was thinking of the same thing. My wife and I might be buying new car though and she said we should get tinted windows. But not tinted I think you could get in trouble. It's a shitty time we live in lol!

 

[nwm]

Legally - I really don't know. I can tell you I do have a reason for that very thing, but it is not obvious. And did that once while on like a 16 hour car ride, out of state, at about 3:00am - no one else was even around - some rest stop on a highway, in a rural area - even the shops in it were closed! Just fuel and vending machines! I actually would rather wait until I get home - or in the case of traveling (like described) a motel room.

 

[SpAzpieSweeTot]

My wife wants to be more involved with my diaper changes when were in public. She said she wants to change me in a private family restroom. But not sure if its even legal for us to go in the family restroom at the same time? Were a younger couple not elderly or anything.

My fear is they might think were having sex in the bathroom. Which we definitely don't plan on having sex in there! It's way too uncomfortable anyway lol. My other fear is since I'm not in a wheelchair is it gonna look weird my wife is going in there with me? Do you have to be in wheelchair to have someone assist you with a diaper change?

Your wife wants to change you. Great. She wants to change you in public, without you having medical need. Not my cup of tea. Is it legal for both of you to go in there at the same time? Sure.

People who want diaper changes to look sexy, can make them look that way, but typically, diaper changes don't look like sex. You're correct. Public bathrooms are dreadfully uncomfortable. Yes, it will look weird to vanillas, should any see you.

Often, handicap rails, and family restrooms, occupy the same area, but not always. Sometimes, there are adult changing tables in there. Do you have to be in a wheelchair to need help? No. Not all disabilities are visible.

As a wheelchair user, my nerve gets touched by the emotional equivalent to a reflex hammer, when someone seeks accommodation they don't need, because other people do. That's why it's not my bag.

Now, on the other end of that, I'm a Little. I get it. I do. Can the 2 of you do this safely? Yes, with proper precautions. Are either of you doing anything illegal? No. Will it look weird to the unaware? Yeah, but they'll probably just be killer embarrassed for you.

Would I do it for someone without medical need? No. That's me. That's my boundary. Am I everyone's moral compass? No! That's too much work.

Look.

There's a good chance, Don't start none; won't be none," applies here.

Most likely, if you don't go out of your way to make there be something for the vanilla public to see, they won't see anything, but, if your conscience is stinging, already, maybe the reason is, you know others require accommodation?

One thing to keep in mind, is that, the vanilla public doesn't know you from Adam's house cat, and it sure would be a shame if you had something invisible, and they felt like donkies,for judging you. I can tell you what I would and wouldn't do, and why. I can also tell you, that, sometimes, the public jumps to conclusions, and judges too harshly, and needs to get over itself. There a reason the handicap stalls aren't locked up, and reserved, here where I am. At the end of the day, it's a bathroom, and if no one with a disability is using it, making a normie wait is a dick move.

 

[MrGnome]

Your wife wants to change you. Great. She wants to change you in public, without you having medical need. Not my cup of tea. Is it legal for both of you to go in there at the same time? Sure.

People who want diaper changes to look sexy, can make them look that way, but typically, diaper changes don't look like sex. You're correct. Public bathrooms are dreadfully uncomfortable. Yes, it will look weird to vanillas, should any see you.

Often, handicap rails, and family restrooms, occupy the same area, but not always. Sometimes, there are adult changing tables in there. Do you have to be in a wheelchair to need help? No. Not all disabilities are visible.

As a wheelchair user, my nerve gets touched by the emotional equivalent to a reflex hammer, when someone seeks accommodation they don't need, because other people do. That's why it's not my bag.

Now, on the other end of that, I'm a Little. I get it. I do. Can the 2 of you do this safely? Yes, with proper precautions. Are either of you doing anything illegal? No. Will it look weird to the unaware? Yeah, but they'll probably just be killer embarrassed for you.

Would I do it for someone without medical need? No. That's me. That's my boundary. Am I everyone's moral compass? No! That's too much work.

Look.

There's a good chance, Don't start none; won't be none," applies here.

Most likely, if you don't go out of your way to make there be something for the vanilla public to see, they won't see anything, but, if your conscience is stinging, already, maybe the reason is, you know others require accommodation?

One thing to keep in mind, is that, the vanilla public doesn't know you from Adam's house cat, and it sure would be a shame if you had something invisible, and they felt like donkies,for judging you. I can tell you what I would and wouldn't do, and why. I can also tell you, that, sometimes, the public jumps to conclusions, and judges too harshly, and needs to get over itself. There a reason the handicap stalls aren't locked up, and reserved, here where I am. At the end of the day, it's a bathroom, and if no one with a disability is using it, making a normie wait is a dick move.

Thanks for the advice! And no I don't get kicks out of people seeing me in public. In fact I really want to make sure its very discrete. My issue with public restrooms is the opening in the top and bottoms of the stalls. I'm not sure if it's my anxiety disorder but I have been dreadfully afraid of using public restrooms since I was a kid. I even was so terrified that other kids would look under the stall and see me exposed. One time in elementary school I held my bowels till the end of day just to avoid using the public restroom. But on the way home I pooped my pants and my mom was not happy.

Even as an adult when I'm not in diapers it's still very hard for me to use a public restroom without basically having a panic attack. I was even paranoid about the sound removing the protective toilet seat covers because of the weird crinkly sound. I basically overthink everything.

And of course if anyone in the restroom with me I can't even fart cause I don't like people listening to me going to the bathroom lol. So anyway I know lots of people talk about physical disabilities but mental disabilities really seem to get ignored cause people can't see them. Especially anxiety disorders people have very hard time understanding. Social interactions with people are more draining for people with anxiety. And sometimes we are so overwhelmed or depressed we need to take a mental sick day. So basically what I'm saying is even without the diaper thing being involved, I prefer to use family restrooms because of my anxiety disorder. And wow I did not know family restrooms had adult changing tables! Does Walmart typically have adult changing tables?

 

[ltaluv]

If I'm understanding you correctly, you are saying that you suffer from severe anxiety, to the point that you can't use public restrooms for fear of others hearing or otherwise becoming aware of your bodily functions.

I'm having trouble understanding how this fits with what I got from your first post on this thread, that you want to express your DL/little side and involve your wife in it by having her change you in the family restroom.

If you're having anxiety over others being aware of your bodily functions in a fairly socially appropriate place like a restroom, you should not be using diapers in public with the attendant risk of others becoming aware of your bodily functions in a socially inappropriate place. You are setting yourself up for ridicule and anxiety any time you use your diaper in public, and I can't imagine how that kind of risk is going to be compatible with your anxiety disorder.

Are you under a doctor's care for your anxiety? What does he or she say about? Medical advice is generally preferable to a bunch of random people telling you different things in an internet forum.

As a lifelong sufferer of mental illness, I can relate to the huge impact that they have in your life - my life has largely been defined, and in many ways limited, by my illness.

As for the issue of using family restroom, although others may disagree with me, I personally find it an issue of taking personal responsibility. If you need the family restroom, that's what it's there for. If you don't need it, personal responsibility and good manners dictate that you should leave it for those who do need it. In our society, good manners have too often been replaced by the notion that we have an absolute right to do whatever we like. I grew up in a very conservative rural area, and my dad would have taken a belt to my backside for letting my right to do whatever I please override my manners and consideration for others. So perhaps I'm hopelessly old-fashioned, but I tend to try to think of others' needs ahead of my own wants, and while I'm happy to use what I need, I try to use only what I truly need and leave the rest for others. Whether that's bacon at a breakfast buffet or time in the family restroom, I prefer to take and use only what I truly require (and, as a child, the bacon thing did once get me a stern talking-to, although not the belt!). If course, each of us is the judge of what we require, so it becomes a matter of following your conscience.

 

[MrGnome]

If I'm understanding you correctly, you are saying that you suffer from severe anxiety, to the point that you can't use public restrooms for fear of others hearing or otherwise becoming aware of your bodily functions.

I'm having trouble understanding how this fits with what I got from your first post on this thread, that you want to express your DL/little side and involve your wife in it by having her change you in the family restroom.

If you're having anxiety over others being aware of your bodily functions in a fairly socially appropriate place like a restroom, you should not be using diapers in public with the attendant risk of others becoming aware of your bodily functions in a socially inappropriate place. You are setting yourself up for ridicule and anxiety any time you use your diaper in public, and I can't imagine how that kind of risk is going to be compatible with your anxiety disorder.

Are you under a doctor's care for your anxiety? What does he or she say about? Medical advice is generally preferable to a bunch of random people telling you different things in an internet forum.

As a lifelong sufferer of mental illness, I can relate to the huge impact that they have in your life - my life has largely been defined, and in many ways limited, by my illness.

As for the issue of using family restroom, although others may disagree with me, I personally find it an issue of taking personal responsibility. If you need the family restroom, that's what it's there for. If you don't need it, personal responsibility and good manners dictate that you should leave it for those who do need it. In our society, good manners have too often been replaced by the notion that we have an absolute right to do whatever we like. I grew up in a very conservative rural area, and my dad would have taken a belt to my backside for letting my right to do whatever I please override my manners and consideration for others. So perhaps I'm hopelessly old-fashioned, but I tend to try to think of others' needs ahead of my own wants, and while I'm happy to use what I need, I try to use only what I truly need and leave the rest for others. Whether that's bacon at a breakfast buffet or time in the family restroom, I prefer to take and use only what I truly require (and, as a child, the bacon thing did once get me a stern talking-to, although not the belt!). If course, each of us is the judge of what we require, so it becomes a matter of following your conscience.

I can force myself to use public restrooms, it's just extremely uncomfortable for me. It's alot less stress knowing someone can't pop their head under the stall or smell you taking a crap, diaper or not. Because they don't bother to a couple more inches of wall on the top and bottom. But I really don't like to unless there's no family restrooms.

And yes I am forcing myself to try new things with my wife I normally wouldn't do. Kinda like cognitive behavioral treatment to become more comfortable with my lifestyle but in very top secret discrete manner. Yes I'm sure there will be times I will basically freak out or things won't go as I planned. Also I will NOT be messing my diaper, it's pee only. I don't think I could handle a messy diaper in public anyway.

And no I don't have a doctor. I went to one about 10 years ago and he prescribed me benzos. Unfortunately they did make me feel more normal but my friend got really messed up and addicted to them. So the side effects really scared the hell out of me. I pretty much been treating myself with magnesium, GABA, organic food, and cannabis.

My parents never made me go to psychiatrist when I was younger even though they knew I showed the symptoms of it. And also because my mom also has the disorder she knows when others have it. Doctors tried to put me on Ritalin when I was in elementary school but my parents also wouldn't have that. Personally I don't think kids should be on these drugs so I'm glad my parents didn't force me to take meds. But sometimes I'm very tempted to pop a xanax to get the worry free sleep I don't get too often anymore! But I force myself not to because I know what they lead to in the long term.

 

[ltaluv]

I can force myself to use public restrooms, it's just extremely uncomfortable for me. It's alot less stress knowing someone can't pop their head under the stall or smell you taking a crap, diaper or not. Because they don't bother to a couple more inches of wall on the top and bottom. But I really don't like to unless there's no family restrooms.

And yes I am forcing myself to try new things with my wife I normally wouldn't do. Kinda like cognitive behavioral treatment to become more comfortable with my lifestyle but in very top secret discrete manner. Yes I'm sure there will be times I will basically freak out or things won't go as I planned. Also I will NOT be messing my diaper, it's pee only. I don't think I could handle a messy diaper in public anyway.

And no I don't have a doctor. I went to one about 10 years ago and he prescribed me benzos. Unfortunately they did make me feel more normal but my friend got really messed up and addicted to them. So the side effects really scared the hell out of me. I pretty much been treating myself with magnesium, GABA, organic food, and cannabis.

My parents never made me go to psychiatrist when I was younger even though they knew I showed the symptoms of it. And also because my mom also has the disorder she knows when others have it. Doctors tried to put me on Ritalin when I was in elementary school but my parents also wouldn't have that. Personally I don't think kids should be on these drugs so I'm glad my parents didn't force me to take meds. But sometimes I'm very tempted to pop a xanax to get the worry free sleep I don't get too often anymore! But I force myself not to because I know what they lead to in the long term.

You are really the final judge of what your needs are, and there's no shame in using something you need, whether it's the family restroom or wearing diapers in the first place. I'm not trying to suggest that you do things that are harmful to your mental health and well-being.

You're wise to avoid benzos. Even at low doses, they can be very addictive. My urologist has prescribed them to help calm my bladder spasms, but they don't help enough to be worth the addiction risk.

 

[SpAzpieSweeTot]

And wow I did not know family restrooms had adult changing tables! Does Walmart typically have adult changing tables?

not every place has them. They're kind of unicorn level rare. I don't think Hell-Mart, if you'll forgive me, has them.

 

[AmberStarfield]

It is called a “family restroom” and I see no reason not to use it as such. If there was a sign saying handicap only that would be different.

 

[Zeke]

Unfortunately changing in the car can get you indecent exposure if a cop wants to be a dick. I was thinking of the same thing. My wife and I might be buying new car though and she said we should get tinted windows. But not tinted I think you could get in trouble. It's a shitty time we live in lol!

You’ve got it right about it being a shitty time we live in. People completely incapable of running their own lives insist on running other’s lives through state and federal legislation. I guess you could always hand anyone giving you grief your used diaper as you exit the restroom. That would give them an understanding of why you were in there although it might be overkill. Stay padded anywhere you can!

 

[MrGnome]

not every place has them. They're kind of unicorn level rare. I don't think Hell-Mart, if you'll forgive me, has them.

Damn too bad they should have them everywhere! After you mentioned the adult changing tables I looked up where you can find them. Unforntally not that many, mainly in the airports and Florida. There is a people trying to push the states to require them in all bathrooms. I couldn't believe handicapped people have to get changed on dirty floors! That really needs to change! At least being an abdl I can somewhat feel how disabled people feel. There's this really awesome one in Chicago, it even has an electronic lift to raise people out of wheelchairs. It looked sooo fun weeeeeee!!! https://chicago.suntimes.com/2019/1...ccessible-than-any-other-in-u-s-officials-say

 

[MrGnome]

You are really the final judge of what your needs are, and there's no shame in using something you need, whether it's the family restroom or wearing diapers in the first place. I'm not trying to suggest that you do things that are harmful to your mental health and well-being.

You're wise to avoid benzos. Even at low doses, they can be very addictive. My urologist has prescribed them to help calm my bladder spasms, but they don't help enough to be worth the addiction risk.

Yes they can be really nasty especially if you have addictive personality! My friend said the guy who first invented benzos said it should never be taken more than 3 weeks straight. Doctors prescribe them for months or even years. My friend has quit for 6 months and still has horrible insomnia. He was literally going nuts quitting cause not sleeping and panic attacks and just gave in to the benzos to sleep. They say you can have withdrawals for 2 years after quitting. You probably better off withdrawing from heroin lol. At least it doesn't last 2 years! I didn't know they prescribed them for bladder spasms. I thought benzos increased chances of incontinence but apparently not.

 

[SoCalIncon]

My wife wants to be more involved with my diaper changes when were in public. She said she wants to change me in a private family restroom. But not sure if its even legal for us to go in the family restroom at the same time? Were a younger couple not elderly or anything.

My fear is they might think were having sex in the bathroom. Which we definitely don't plan on having sex in there! It's way too uncomfortable anyway lol. My other fear is since I'm not in a wheelchair is it gonna look weird my wife is going in there with me? Do you have to be in wheelchair to have someone assist you with a diaper change?

No one knows what disability you may have. It is absolutely legal.

I'm ic and I was at LAX about to board a plane and went into the family restroom to change my diaper before the flight and heard knocking on the door. When I came out there was a mom with 2 kids and one looked quite disabled and the mom barked at me that the family restroom was for families and the disabled and not "able bodied entitled white men".

I just said "oh sorry I thought severe incontinence and the need to change my diapers in privacy counted for that" and lifted my t shirt to show her the waste band of my diaper and added "maybe you shouldn't make assumptions about people you don't know". I think she got the message. Normally I'd never expose my diaper and in fact go to great lengths to keep it private but I really wanted to throw it in that miserable bitch's face.

Point is, if someone gave you shit about it your wife could clap back and say she's your caregiver and you have mobility or motor skills issues that require toileting assistance.

 

[MrGnome]

No one knows what disability you may have. It is absolutely legal.

I'm ic and I was at LAX about to board a plane and went into the family restroom to change my diaper before the flight and heard knocking on the door. When I came out there was a mom with 2 kids and one looked quite disabled and the mom barked at me that the family restroom was for families and the disabled and not "able bodied entitled white men".

I just said "oh sorry I thought severe incontinence and the need to change my diapers in privacy counted for that" and lifted my t shirt to show her the waste band of my diaper and added "maybe you shouldn't make assumptions about people you don't know". I think she got the message. Normally I'd never expose my diaper and in fact go to great lengths to keep it private but I really wanted to throw it in that miserable bitch's face.

Point is, if someone gave you shit about it your wife could clap back and say she's your caregiver and you have mobility or motor skills issues that require toileting assistance.

That's got to be one of the best responses I heard on this thread! Glad you let her have it! What was her response lol?

 

[SpAzpieSweeTot]

No one knows what disability you may have. It is absolutely legal.

I'm ic and I was at LAX about to board a plane and went into the family restroom to change my diaper before the flight and heard knocking on the door. When I came out there was a mom with 2 kids and one looked quite disabled and the mom barked at me that the family restroom was for families and the disabled and not "able bodied entitled white men".

I just said "oh sorry I thought severe incontinence and the need to change my diapers in privacy counted for that" and lifted my t shirt to show her the waste band of my diaper and added "maybe you shouldn't make assumptions about people you don't know". I think she got the message. Normally I'd never expose my diaper and in fact go to great lengths to keep it private but I really wanted to throw it in that miserable bitch's face.

Point is, if someone gave you shit about it your wife could clap back and say she's your caregiver and you have mobility or motor skills issues that require toileting assistance.

Every person who needs a disabled stall for something that can't be seen, not to mention every Service Dog handler with an invisible disability, applauds you.