Sombody had to do it to carry a warning

[Zeke]

I know, right? *Never* put a child in a washing machine, it could leave them... ... agitated!

You know when I was a kid I wouldn’t have minded crawling into a washing machine. Now anything that confining sends chills up my spine just thinking about getting stuck in there. MRI’s are bothering me a lot more than they used to as well.

 

[theancientmariner]

Kid: It'll be awesome, like a Sit'N'Spin *and* a Slip'N'Slide at the same time!

I swear, this thread is making me laugh way too much!

 

[Kirisin]

 

[Belarin]

That's awesome @Kirisin, had me rolling.

 

[feetintrouble]

On a boxed dessert:
(Printed on bottom of box): Do not turn upside down.
Too late! You lose.

On a nutcracker: Does not crack nuts. (Of course, this is a Nutcracker as in the ballet.)

On a child's Superman costume: Does not enable you to fly.

Do not iron clothes on the body.

 

[Newbaby110521]

For me the weirdest war label is when they put on a package of nuts ‘Warning! Contains Nuts’ of course it contains nuts it says on the packaging‘Cashew Nuts’ or ‘Brazil Nuts’ the word nut is in the title how stupid do they think we are?

 

[ade]

Heyyyyy, folks into BDSM have to get their start *somewhere* !

That's a Hotpoint!
No wonder Persil warns us to, "Always keep away from children!"

The Strain, on Disney, has a good warning:
Considering that it's a vampircal gore-fest, dealing with genocide, The Holocaust, nuclear armageddon, murder galore, child abduction, baby-draining and freaky rape, we are forewarned (as if being warned against) solely for the depictions of tobacco use!

 

[KittyninjaW]

There's a funny clip about this.

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[Zeke]

On a boxed dessert:
(Printed on bottom of box): Do not turn upside down.
Too late! You lose.

On a nutcracker: Does not crack nuts. (Of course, this is a Nutcracker as in the ballet.)

On a child's Superman costume: Does not enable you to fly.

Do not iron clothes on the body.

The tavern that used to serve as the base for our snowmobile club had a “well duh” sign on the door that said: “Caution Open Door Before Leaving” and though it was a “well duh” sign there were quite regular failures to heed its warnings (not that I was ever amongst this number!). Those were the days when the machines weren’t nearly as powerful or fast and the DNR, County Sheriffs, and State Patrol weren’t writing DWI or OWI tickets for snowmobilers yet (this was in the early 1970s). Wow, it just occurred to me that I haven’t been on a snow machine for any time at all for nearly 50 years. I might have to take it up again with how good this newer machines ride and handle, not to mention the heated hand grips and seats and other girly features they’ve got now.

 

[Zeke]

Obviously, the dextrose serving suggestion is for cannibals who like sweets! And chasing their meals!

Is a cannibal someone who partakes in cannabis? Seems like an awfully minor thing to get stoned for!

 

[Zeke]

View attachment 125990

Kirisin i see from your introduction page that you’re from Bristol. When I was a counselor at Bible Camp one summer I bought and read a paperback titled “George Muller Young Man In Bristol”. What Muller did, taking care of feeding, clothing, housing, educating, and looking to the spiritual lives of over 2,000 orphans at at time was amazing, especially during a period when an orphan was considered the next lowest thing to a snakes belly by society at the time. Making this even more remarkable was Muller’s strict policy of never making his or the orphan’s need to anyone, but God. He cared for 10,024 orphans during his lifetime, and provided educational opportunities for the orphans to the point that he was even accused by some of raising the poor above their natural station in British life. He established 117 schools which offered Christian education to more than 120,000. After his life, his work was continued by The George Müller Foundation, which was renamed The George Müller Charitable Trust on 1 March, 2009. The Trust maintains the key principle of seeking money through prayer alone – it actively shuns fund-raising activities. Were you aware of Muller’s efforts and what he had accomplished during his time in Bristol?

 

[Kirisin]

Launder a child?!!!

Kirisin i see from your introduction page that you’re from Bristol. When I was a counselor at Bible Camp one summer I bought and read a paperback titled “George Muller Young Man In Bristol”. What Muller did, taking care of feeding, clothing, housing, educating, and looking to the spiritual lives of over 2,000 orphans at at time was amazing, especially during a period when an orphan was considered the next lowest thing to a snakes belly by society at the time. Making this even more remarkable was Muller’s strict policy of never making his or the orphan’s need to anyone, but God. He cared for 10,024 orphans during his lifetime, and provided educational opportunities for the orphans to the point that he was even accused by some of raising the poor above their natural station in British life. He established 117 schools which offered Christian education to more than 120,000. After his life, his work was continued by The George Müller Foundation, which was renamed The George Müller Charitable Trust on 1 March, 2009. The Trust maintains the key principle of seeking money through prayer alone – it actively shuns fund-raising activities. Were you aware of Muller’s efforts and what he had accomplished during his time in Bristol?

You must have confused me with somebody else. I'm from Montana US but thanks for asking.

 

[Zeke]

That's awesome @Kirisin, had me rolling.

Belarin, I see from your introduction page that you’re from Bristol. When I was a counselor at Bible Camp one summer I bought and read a paperback titled “George Muller Young Man In Bristol”. What Muller did, taking care of feeding, clothing, housing, educating, and looking to the spiritual lives of over 2,000 orphans at at time was amazing, especially during a period when an orphan was considered the next lowest thing to a snakes belly by society at the time. Making this even more remarkable was Muller’s strict policy of never making his or the orphan’s need to anyone, but God. He cared for 10,024 orphans during his lifetime, and provided educational opportunities for the orphans to the point that he was even accused by some of raising the poor above their natural station in British life. He established 117 schools which offered Christian education to more than 120,000. After his life, his work was continued by The George Müller Foundation, which was renamed The George Müller Charitable Trust on 1 March, 2009. The Trust maintains the key principle of seeking money through prayer alone – it actively shuns fund-raising activities. Were you aware of Muller’s efforts and what he had accomplished during his time in Bristol?

I got your username switched with Kirisin’s, and addressed this post to him at first, until he pointed out to me that he was a third of the way around the world from Bristol, England in Montana.

 

[Zeke]

You must have confused me with somebody else. I'm from Montana US but thanks for asking.

Sorry Kirisin, I somehow managed to get your username confused with that of another involved in this thread, Belarin. I’m not sure how I could get it wrong so easily, but given the opportunity there’s few things that I can’t screw up! I like to look at what people post about themselves in “about section” of their “profile posts”. Once I saw Bristol and started thinking about George Muller and revisiting his time in that English city I got Belarin and you switched up somehow. That’s what I get for posting late at night and half asleep.

 

[Belarin]

Belarin, I see from your introduction page that you’re from Bristol. When I was a counselor at Bible Camp one summer I bought and read a paperback titled “George Muller Young Man In Bristol”. What Muller did, taking care of feeding, clothing, housing, educating, and looking to the spiritual lives of over 2,000 orphans at at time was amazing, especially during a period when an orphan was considered the next lowest thing to a snakes belly by society at the time. Making this even more remarkable was Muller’s strict policy of never making his or the orphan’s need to anyone, but God. He cared for 10,024 orphans during his lifetime, and provided educational opportunities for the orphans to the point that he was even accused by some of raising the poor above their natural station in British life. He established 117 schools which offered Christian education to more than 120,000. After his life, his work was continued by The George Müller Foundation, which was renamed The George Müller Charitable Trust on 1 March, 2009. The Trust maintains the key principle of seeking money through prayer alone – it actively shuns fund-raising activities. Were you aware of Muller’s efforts and what he had accomplished during his time in Bristol?

I got your username switched with Kirisin’s, and addressed this post to him at first, until he pointed out to me that he was a third of the way around the world from Bristol, England in Montana.

I hace heard of him yes and the trust founded in his name. I've read bits and pieces from local history museum and my own reading on Bristols history, I wont claim to know the full history about him or his past but I do know bits.

He's the kind of guy everyone should be looking up to though and whom had he been born a few centuries earlier would have been probably been sainted. Lots of completely selfless work, I'm not really a religious person but regardless of his beliefs and reasons what he did for the children was incredible.

I can tell you that of the 5 orphanage houses he had built the first 3 have now been converted to flat blocks since 2000 as the government began closing orphanages int the mid 20th century in favour of the Foster system and placing children into homes, there are a couple of "children's homes", as they are now termed, left but the goal is to have all children placed within a family Home.

The remaining 2, houses 4 and 5, are now a part of the city of Bristol college buildings.

The Muller Trust also has a small museum that is only open via appointment that also maintains records of all the children who passed through the orphanages.

He was not always so righteous though, in his very early life he was a liar, a thief and a swindler, this changed after attending a prayer meeting and finding his faith in God. If it interests you and you can find it there was a docudrama about his life called "robber of the cruel streets".

 

[Zeke]

I hace heard of him yes and the trust founded in his name. I've read bits and pieces from local history museum and my own reading on Bristols history, I wont claim to know the full history about him or his past but I do know bits.

He's the kind of guy everyone should be looking up to though and whom had he been born a few centuries earlier would have been probably been sainted. Lots of completely selfless work, I'm not really a religious person but regardless of his beliefs and reasons what he did for the children was incredible.

I can tell you that of the 5 orphanage houses he had built the first 3 have now been converted to flat blocks since 2000 as the government began closing orphanages int the mid 20th century in favour of the Foster system and placing children into homes, there are a couple of "children's homes", as they are now termed, left but the goal is to have all children placed within a family Home.

The remaining 2, houses 4 and 5, are now a part of the city of Bristol college buildings.

The Muller Trust also has a small museum that is only open via appointment that also maintains records of all the children who passed through the orphanages.

He was not always so righteous though, in his very early life he was a liar, a thief and a swindler, this changed after attending a prayer meeting and finding his faith in God. If it interests you and you can find it there was a docudrama about his life called "robber of the cruel streets".

The book that I mentioned gave his pre conversion history. His father was a German government tax collector I believe and he wanted George to become a minister as it was seen as a reliable income in those days and he wanted George to be in a position to support him when he retired. Muller was expelled from several schools and brought up on charges several times for his skipping out on his debts. One night while he was in seminary he attended a house church Bible study, which was illegal for someone to hold that wasn’t a government approved pastor, and he became a believer. This led to his desire to be a missionary and that’s how he first came to England. He took a position as pastor of a small church and he and his wife didn’t take a salary but chose to receive only what was placed in the donation box. Prior to his taking the pastor’s position pew rents were assessed based on their distance from the pulpit, which the Mullers found to be unfair to the poor, and these fees were eliminated. Once he began his work with the orphans he really began to test his ability to support these children on prayer only and he refused to make his or their needs known to anyone but God through prayer. When he was preparing to build one of his first orphan houses he found some land for sale that he felt would be perfect but the owner wanted more than what Muller had and what he believed God would have him pay for it. Muller and his wife began to prayer about it and the landowner contacted him latter agreeing to accept the amount Muller had offered. He said that he had been having nightmares ever since Muller made his offer that the owner had felt was too low but chose to accept it to end his nightmares. George Muller is who I consider to be a fine example of a Christian and Christian generosity, not the prosperity gospel preachers that are only concerned about getting everything they can from their cosmic genie in the sky.

 

[theancientmariner]

It was the one with "don't slap a panda" that had me in absolute stitches, just such a random thing to end on.

Well we shouldn't! They're just so cute!