Need advice: How to go without diapers

[abdl345]

Hi all I'm abdl and a couple months ago I decided to go almost 24/7. More like 16/7. After years of the binge/purge cycle I finally decided to accept myself and wear as often as possible. So most of the time I'm very happy. The one exception is work. I work in sales so I deal with a lot of people directly throughout the day. Many times in intimate settings and close quarters. Think small offices and cubicles. I also ride with people in the company truck. So going full on 24/7 would be challenging in my situation.

I think most of us can agree work sucks in general. But going without diapers makes it even more challenging. When I'm diapered my mood shifts, I'm extremely happy, and nothing really bothers me. Without them I don't feel like myself. I see my fiancee' on lunch and she says I'm a completely different person. She says you can see it in my face. And she doesn't like it either.

So my questions to you all are...

What are some good coping mechanisms you have used when you can't wear?
And/Or... What are your suggestions on getting over this last hurdle and going full on 24/7?

 

[ArgentBuffalo]

So my questions to you all are...

What are some good coping mechanisms you have used when you can't wear?
And/Or... What are your suggestions on getting over this last hurdle and going full on 24/7?

Based on what you've written, it sounds like it would be beneficial for you to take an AND on those last two questions, not an OR...work on your coping mechanisms and mental health in general, while trying out 24/7, with the attitude that you have a legit need. Not IC, mind, psychological.

If your fiancee is aware and supportive, I would make some adjustments to your wardrobe to better accommodate/conceal your diapers and if you're in an unfriendly environment where you're worried about being found out, pick up some justifiable (which is to say, no fun prints) diapers for work. I assume that you'd be using them during the day for #1, so think about your fluid intake and set up a rough change schedule and plan of action, if you'll need to change during the day at all. Think of a private spot to change where you won't be stressed. Also, if you need one, pick out a good option for a plausibly deniable diaper bag.

If your dress code is ok with denim, I would recommend roomy jeans for crinkle suppression, or failing that dark slacks, as well as a tucked in undershirt and boxers over top of a diaper. During cold months, wear anything that drapes low to conceal the diaper bulk a little. Long jackets are your best friend (and super stealth) if you're outdoors. I find oxford shirts that are meant to be worn untucked do a decent job to break up the lines of a diaper during the warmer months. If you have to wear anything that will emphasize the bulge (light slacks, tucked in shirts, outfits that are meant to be body conforming), buy trim diapers for work that will conceal well. Just make sure you're aware of capacity and that you change well before the possibility of a leak.

On the other front, I would recommend mindfulness, meditation, getting a good night's sleep, eating healthily, and exercising to try and boost mood generally. If there are things that are making you unhappy or making it hard to concentrate, I would give them some thought, then try to attack the root cause. If you don't have success with doing this on your own, it might be worth it to confide in your fiancee, a trusted friend, or a counselor/therapist, who might be able to offer you a different perspective and coping tools.

If it's a matter of wearing vs. not wearing, though, and you're generally committed to 24/7 wear...remember that there is a state of mind for diapering, where a certain state is "normal" for you and the other is not. If wearing diapers for you is "normal", you'll be back to it in no time. Focus on the return, not the current state of abnormality. During those times you'd simply be "diapered in spirit". That might help you get through some periods.

 

[abdl345]

Based on what you've written, it sounds like it would be beneficial for you to take an AND on those last two questions, not an OR...work on your coping mechanisms and mental health in general, while trying out 24/7, with the attitude that you have a legit need. Not IC, mind, psychological.

If your fiancee is aware and supportive, I would make some adjustments to your wardrobe to better accommodate/conceal your diapers and if you're in an unfriendly environment where you're worried about being found out, pick up some justifiable (which is to say, no fun prints) diapers for work. I assume that you'd be using them during the day for #1, so think about your fluid intake and set up a rough change schedule and plan of action, if you'll need to change during the day at all. Think of a private spot to change where you won't be stressed. Also, if you need one, pick out a good option for a plausibly deniable diaper bag.

If your dress code is ok with denim, I would recommend roomy jeans for crinkle suppression, or failing that dark slacks, as well as a tucked in undershirt and boxers over top of a diaper. During cold months, wear anything that drapes low to conceal the diaper bulk a little. Long jackets are your best friend (and super stealth) if you're outdoors. I find oxford shirts that are meant to be worn untucked do a decent job to break up the lines of a diaper during the warmer months. If you have to wear anything that will emphasize the bulge (light slacks, tucked in shirts, outfits that are meant to be body conforming), buy trim diapers for work that will conceal well. Just make sure you're aware of capacity and that you change well before the possibility of a leak.

On the other front, I would recommend mindfulness, meditation, getting a good night's sleep, eating healthily, and exercising to try and boost mood generally. If there are things that are making you unhappy or making it hard to concentrate, I would give them some thought, then try to attack the root cause. If you don't have success with doing this on your own, it might be worth it to confide in your fiancee, a trusted friend, or a counselor/therapist, who might be able to offer you a different perspective and coping tools.

If it's a matter of wearing vs. not wearing, though, and you're generally committed to 24/7 wear...remember that there is a state of mind for diapering, where a certain state is "normal" for you and the other is not. If wearing diapers for you is "normal", you'll be back to it in no time. Focus on the return, not the current state of abnormality. During those times you'd simply be "diapered in spirit". That might help you get through some periods.

Yeah I'm thinking my main problem is that I'm a bit scared. If I can go a size up on shirts that might be enough to conceal. I work 4 minutes from home so I can easily stop home on my route to change. And yes fiancee more than supports me. Guess fear is the main thing.

Overall I'm "OK" when I'm not wearing. I got by for years with no diapers at all. But wow jeez am I happy when wearing. It's crazy! But I've been unsuccessful carrying those feelings over for that 8 hours. I guess main thing is I have to stop being afraid and just go 24/7.

 

[messydiaper]

I also have a job where if I wore something like Safaris people would know. So when I want to go 24 hrs a day I wear pull up style underwear to work. Tena is probably my favorite. They wear like underwear but can take a partial bladder full of urine, and there is no tell tale noise.

 

[jamiejamie]

If I can’t wear because I worry about people in close quarters hearing the crinkle. I just wear cloth diapers but don’t actually go in it cuz I hate washing them. I go to the restroom and pull it down a bit to go bathroom.

 

[geka]

You could just wear a pair of training pants at work to me it feels like a diaper

 

[abdl345]

I also have a job where if I wore something like Safaris people would know. So when I want to go 24 hrs a day I wear pull up style underwear to work. Tena is probably my favorite. They wear like underwear but can take a partial bladder full of urine, and there is no tell tale noise.

Yep that's where I'm at too. Pullups. In my case if I have to go out with people I know I wear a Abena M2 Pullup. Haven't worn at work yet though