How many adisc members who are abdl BEFORE you were IC?

[enthusi]

First, for what I know, once you are NOT injured or sick, you remain continence. Saying you became incontinence and it isn't "fetishize," you're simply wrong. You identify yourself as abdl, not IC together. Whether you call it a fetish or not, you are "glamorize" our medical IC problems.

If you want to insist that you forced yourself to become IC, keep it away from the IC forum. Please. You sound like I nice guy. Sometimes I wonder why you insist on posting our IC issues, especially when it's not helpful.

Okay I get your sentiment. But can you please try to have an open mind?

For starters I am legitimately incontinent. It amuses me to no end how people who don’t know me and have no idea what I’ve gone through can insist I’m not incontinent because there is nothing “medically wrong” with me. It’s all over my medical chart , and each and every time I’ve tried to leave the house without a diaper on I have an accident. I don’t know how I’m supposed to prove it to you or anyone else. I’ll just say you can chose to believe me, or you can chose to assume the worst about me. It’s your call.

Would it make you feel at ease with me if instead of saying I made myself incontinent, I said that I’ve always had sensory issues related to the feeling of a full bladder? Maintaining bladder control always felt like work. Maybe if I wasn’t an ABDL I would push through it, but that’s neither here nor there. Or to put it another way, maybe there’s a reason why I was so successful at untraining.

You asked that I not post here anymore. I’m gonna tell you right now that’s a hard no. I am going to continue posting on the forum, because I AM incontinent, and I deserve to have a voice. I always go to great lengths to provide thoughtful and affirming replies.

The first thing I do every morning is check the ADISC incontinence forum to see what’s shaking. Interacting on this forum is one of the highlights of my day. And you don’t get to take that away from me.

So perhaps, rather than judging me and telling me I don’t belong here, appreciate that I have a unique perspective?

 

[smnapp]

I was a DL in my younger years. I developed an affinity for diapers in my pre-teen or early teen years (I can’t remember exactly when.)

When I joined ADISC it was my DL interests that brought me here. It was the stories and adult diapers forums that I enjoyed as a lurker.

As I aged (now in my mid 40s) I started having bed wetting problems. Not every night at first. The night time problems became frequent enough that I started wearing diapers to bed every night. I used to sleep naked most nights. Having to put on a diaper EVERY night before going to bed quickly lost its luster. Once the daytime OAB/urge issues started, I was wearing guards all the time. I also tried pull-ups. Neither would take a flood if I didn’t make it to a toilet. I came to the conclusion that quality tape-on diapers were the most practical solution for me. During this time I stopped visiting ADISC. I was trying to adjust to the changes in my life and didn’t know where I fit at that point.

I do regularly see my doctors. I don’t have an interest in taking more meds that might have side effects. I already take enough meds for other issues.

Diapers are now simply my choice of underwear. I don’t ‘enjoy’ diapers like I used to. I also don’t dislike or hate them.

I considered not even admitting I liked diapers when I returned to ADISC. I was looking to become involved with the community to learn more and pass along the knowledge I have to other folks dealing with incontinence. I felt it best to be straight forward about my history in diapers. I believe honesty is always best.

 

[hbic60]

@greatlake5: I appreciate your posts and threads in this section in general very much, but in this one I disagree a little with you. It seems to me that concerning IC you only accept pure black and pure white. But the whole world, including IC, is NOT only black and white, but also grey - and unfortunately there exists not only one grey, but thousands shades of grey. So, I'm very sure, that there are people who are genuine and medically proved incontinent, but maybe also have a DL or AB side - and it is for sure possible, that an AB or DL develops during live real incontinence.
Where do you see the red line to be allowed to post in the incontinence forum? Do you want us to show a medical certificate at the entrance door to Incontinence Section before we are allowed to comment?

Don't get me wrong, my UIC is real and I could show you prescriptions from my doc proving it, I do not define myself DL or AB at all. But on the other hand, as written in other threads, I have learned to accept my condition, I've decided rather to like my diapers instead of hating them, I sometimes even like to be diapered instead of rushing desperately with an urge to the toilet, or I rather release in my diaper with outside activities instead of staying at home - I sometimes question myself if this doesn't make me some kind of DL?!? But, as I said, the world is grey, not only black and white...

I don't care if someone posts here is purely IC or has also (additionally) other tendencies (which I tolerate without hesitation, but don't want to be discussed here in IC section), as long as the comment is valuable, respectful, in general is according to the terms of IC forum

 

[LordDuque]

It looks like a majority of abdl people say they became IC after they where abdl first. Which for me seems absurd. Of course there are large numbers of abdl people who became IC afterword. And some of them are legitimate. But how many who just like to say it (faking it)? No one really knows but I bet most of them just like to say it. Obviously there are abdl's that became after a SCI (apologies for the legitimate ones). Aside from the original question, how many SCI/abdl's still enjoy their diapers?

I've always been IC. And I don't identify myself as abdl. To be honest I just don't know how many abdl/IC are legitimate. But I think it's rare.

Yes and that’s one reason why I wrote that post, because after becoming IC and having anymore options than wearing ‘em I had lost most part of what made it exciting (to me at least) and ma even all of it. So I agree with you in the sense that I know for myself it can happen to be DL and later wearing diapers for its original purpose, but….you’re right in many senses. And to me seems suspicious too to see a number of them so large. Well, that among other suspicions I have, but being that one the most clear to me. And of course I respect what hbic 60 says, but I don’t think its that the reason why he believes that. And of course that everyone is free to post here even dedicated to a medical condition some may not have, and their post equally valuable as any of us IC. Even if someone lied as he suggested I won’t ban him even if proved cause to me the limit is when it’s to make someone act differently as he would knowing the truth or disrespecting or similars. I only say in some way I think he says sensible things and that to me there is also things that make me a bit doubting but just because I am and some act as I’d never do, and that’s it. And as you both I expect you don’t get me wrong either . Best regards

 

[tiron101]

To be fair, anyone could come here claiming to be the most severely incontinent person ever born, loudly denouncing the very existence of anyone who got any sort of thrill at wearing a diaper, and they could have off-the-chart ABDL desires. That's just the nature of the internet.

It actually wasn't until my twenties when I was shopping for diapers for my worsening bedwetting problem that I discovered there was a whole world of people who actually liked diapers. Not being that vanilla and open to new things, I made some contacts online and met up with some people. It was nice to know that they existed, because it was common ground with guys who weren't repulsed by others who wear diapers.

Interestingly several of the DL guys I met either were late-age bedwetters or still had lingering problems. There are plenty of adult bedwetters and incontinent adults. Things also happen on the road to old age, so there is a greater possibility as we get older that something bad happens, whether it's incontinence or something else. Is everyone authentic? Nope. But as long as people are decent, I'm good.

 

[ltaluv]

There are many reasons that people wear diapers - incontinence, psychological comfort, sexual attraction, and many others. None of these are wrong, or more or less worthy of respect.

That said, I will note that this is the Incontinence forum. At the top of the forum, Moo (the forum owner) has stated that it is for "Discussions about dealing with incontinence." It is not, therefore, for discussions about all the other myriad reasons that people might wear diapers - those belong elsewhere on this site.

See, here's the thing: The psychological issues that stem from incontinence are often very different from the issues encountered by those who wear for other reasons. If you wear by choice, in that you can choose at a given time whether or not to wear a diaper, then your experience is quite different from someone who cannot make that choice. You may have psychological challenges related to your need to wear or your attraction to diapers, but these are generally different from the challenges experienced by incontinent people, and thus not really appropriate to this forum.

Some of the other challenges faced by those who wear diapers are broadly similar - we must figure out how to change in public places, how to carry enough diapers with us to get through a day or a two-week vacation, and how to make our diapers less noticeable under clothes. We all experience leaks, discomfort, and the possibility of public shaming and ridicule if our use of diapers is discovered. This is, I believe, why Moo has stated, "Continent folk may post, but they must be respectful of the people who are incontinent." We have much in common, but not everything in common.

As far as people who fit into multiple categories, such as DLs who become incontinent, I personally believe that it's fairly common. Statistics are notoriously difficult to come up with, but I don't think it's unreasonable to assume that somewhere around 10% of the population has some level of urinary incontinence, and around 2% have some level of fecal incontinence. If ABDLs are a cross section of society at large, as one might reasonably expect, then their numbers would be similar, so perhaps 10% of ABDLs could be assumed to be incontinent. (The actual situation is of course much more complicated, and for various reasons I think that this estimate is likely to be low. That's another discussion, though.)

Nonetheless, the experience of an ABDL who becomes incontinent is likely to be rather different from the experience of a non-ABDL who becomes incontinent. In particular, I expect it makes it much easier to accept the use of diapers, and similarly to more readily choose diapers over other possibly ways of managing incontinence. Most non-ABDL people who find themselves leaking urine or stool are uncomfortable with (and in many cases horrified by) having to manage the issue with diapers, and are likely to search for other solutions before resigning themselves to a life of changing in public restrooms and carrying a diaper bag everywhere. This makes the psychology of the issue fundamentally different, and it's quite difficult for one group to really understand what the other group is going through. Incidentally, it's also why most incontinent people find it fairly easy to pick out many of the people who are claiming incontinence as an excuse for wearing as an ABDL.

It is an endless source of frustration to me when somebody asks a question about how to overcome fear of having their diaper noticed, and they get responses along the lines of, "Just wear the thickest diaper you can find and don't worry if you waddle. Try pooping in it, it feels great!" This is abjectly unhelpful to the person - it does not answer the question, and it does not address the underlying psychological need to live life without being dominated by fear. It also tends to push away non-ABDL incontinent people. I am a member of other incontinence support sites in addition to this one, and this forum gets mentioned on those sites as a place to stay away from because it's full of ABDLs who want to fetishize our medical problems. That saddens me, because this site is in general very helpful, very friendly, and full of people with keen insights and tremendous experience. At the same time, I can certainly understand where that sentiment comes from.

 

[enthusi]

There are many reasons that people wear diapers - incontinence, psychological comfort, sexual attraction, and many others. None of these are wrong, or more or less worthy of respect.

That said, I will note that this is the Incontinence forum. At the top of the forum, Moo (the forum owner) has stated that it is for "Discussions about dealing with incontinence." It is not, therefore, for discussions about all the other myriad reasons that people might wear diapers - those belong elsewhere on this site.

See, here's the thing: The psychological issues that stem from incontinence are often very different from the issues encountered by those who wear for other reasons. If you wear by choice, in that you can choose at a given time whether or not to wear a diaper, then your experience is quite different from someone who cannot make that choice. You may have psychological challenges related to your need to wear or your attraction to diapers, but these are generally different from the challenges experienced by incontinent people, and thus not really appropriate to this forum.

Some of the other challenges faced by those who wear diapers are broadly similar - we must figure out how to change in public places, how to carry enough diapers with us to get through a day or a two-week vacation, and how to make our diapers less noticeable under clothes. We all experience leaks, discomfort, and the possibility of public shaming and ridicule if our use of diapers is discovered. This is, I believe, why Moo has stated, "Continent folk may post, but they must be respectful of the people who are incontinent." We have much in common, but not everything in common.

As far as people who fit into multiple categories, such as DLs who become incontinent, I personally believe that it's fairly common. Statistics are notoriously difficult to come up with, but I don't think it's unreasonable to assume that somewhere around 10% of the population has some level of urinary incontinence, and around 2% have some level of fecal incontinence. If ABDLs are a cross section of society at large, as one might reasonably expect, then their numbers would be similar, so perhaps 10% of ABDLs could be assumed to be incontinent. (The actual situation is of course much more complicated, and for various reasons I think that this estimate is likely to be low. That's another discussion, though.)

Nonetheless, the experience of an ABDL who becomes incontinent is likely to be rather different from the experience of a non-ABDL who becomes incontinent. In particular, I expect it makes it much easier to accept the use of diapers, and similarly to more readily choose diapers over other possibly ways of managing incontinence. Most non-ABDL people who find themselves leaking urine or stool are uncomfortable with (and in many cases horrified by) having to manage the issue with diapers, and are likely to search for other solutions before resigning themselves to a life of changing in public restrooms and carrying a diaper bag everywhere. This makes the psychology of the issue fundamentally different, and it's quite difficult for one group to really understand what the other group is going through. Incidentally, it's also why most incontinent people find it fairly easy to pick out many of the people who are claiming incontinence as an excuse for wearing as an ABDL.

It is an endless source of frustration to me when somebody asks a question about how to overcome fear of having their diaper noticed, and they get responses along the lines of, "Just wear the thickest diaper you can find and don't worry if you waddle. Try pooping in it, it feels great!" This is abjectly unhelpful to the person - it does not answer the question, and it does not address the underlying psychological need to live life without being dominated by fear. It also tends to push away non-ABDL incontinent people. I am a member of other incontinence support sites in addition to this one, and this forum gets mentioned on those sites as a place to stay away from because it's full of ABDLs who want to fetishize our medical problems. That saddens me, because this site is in general very helpful, very friendly, and full of people with keen insights and tremendous experience. At the same time, I can certainly understand where that sentiment comes from.

You bring up some really valid points. I often think about my struggles with ulcerative colitis. It’s been an endless source of misery. I hate every thing about the condition, and it’s hard for me to think of any positive impact it’s had on my life. I wonder what it would be like if I joined a support group that also included people with a “colitis fetish.” I really hope that’s not a thing. It would be off putting. Though at the end of the day I wouldn’t care as long as I felt better about myself. I completely agree it’s not helpful for someone who feels nervous and ashamed of incontinence to be told to just enjoy wearing diapers.

As for this forum’s reputation vs others, I can’t speak to that. It makes since that this forum attracts more ABDL’s, seeing as the majority of content on the website is for ABDLs. The main reason I hang around this forum compared to others is because there is more continent, and it’s of higher quality. In my experience many forums are geared towards people with less severe incontinence and are newer and dealing with raw emotions, with a lot of the same advice. “Make sure you see a urologist for that. Hang in there.” Don’t get me wrong, that’s important stuff. But it doesn’t keep me coming back for more. Maybe I’m a symptom of the problem, but it seems there’s more good stuff here than not good stuff, so don’t sweat it.

 

[hbic60]

It is an endless source of frustration to me when somebody asks a question about how to overcome fear of having their diaper noticed, and they get responses along the lines of, "Just wear the thickest diaper you can find and don't worry if you waddle. Try pooping in it, it feels great!" This is abjectly unhelpful to the person - it does not answer the question, and it does not address the underlying psychological need to live life without being dominated by fear. It also tends to push away non-ABDL incontinent people. I am a member of other incontinence support sites in addition to this one, and this forum gets mentioned on those sites as a place to stay away from because it's full of ABDLs who want to fetishize our medical problems. That saddens me, because this site is in general very helpful, very friendly, and full of people with keen insights and tremendous experience. At the same time, I can certainly understand where that sentiment comes from.

Your whole post is full of very valid thoughts, but especially this paragraph I couldn't agree more. I've also seen similar frustrating responses here in IC section, but fortunately the button "Report" works very well - great thanks to the admins! It's essential that this forum stays "clean" according the rules at the top.
I like this forum very much for the open-minded, friendly and mostly respectful atmosphere. Compared to other incontinence forums it's less pure medical based but here we talk more about our feelings, experiences, psychological aspects, practical issues in our daily lives which I appreciate quite much - the pure medical issues I can discuss with my doc, my feelings I share with my wife but there are certain limitations as she is not IC and cannot follow up every thought, and there I'm thankful for this forum to be able to exchange with people in similar condition!

 

[Bnuuy]

It is an endless source of frustration to me when somebody asks a question about how to overcome fear of having their diaper noticed, and they get responses along the lines of, "Just wear the thickest diaper you can find and don't worry if you waddle. Try pooping in it, it feels great!" This is abjectly unhelpful to the person - it does not answer the question, and it does not address the underlying psychological need to live life without being dominated by fear. It also tends to push away non-ABDL incontinent people. I am a member of other incontinence support sites in addition to this one, and this forum gets mentioned on those sites as a place to stay away from because it's full of ABDLs who want to fetishize our medical problems. That saddens me, because this site is in general very helpful, very friendly, and full of people with keen insights and tremendous experience. At the same time, I can certainly understand where that sentiment comes from.

I guess in a way I'm surprised that non-ABDL IC people are willing to post here at all but it seems like on most other places on the internet people are afraid to talk about wearing diapers at all which seems like it would make it difficult to actually discuss practical aspects of how to deal with that, so hopefully it fills some sort of niche and serves a useful purpose there, I guess?

 

[AnalogRTO]

I guess in a way I'm surprised that non-ABDL IC people are willing to post here at all but it seems like on most other places on the internet people are afraid to talk about wearing diapers at all which seems like it would make it difficult to actually discuss practical aspects of how to deal with that, so hopefully it fills some sort of niche and serves a useful purpose there, I guess?

The thing that I found here as an IC person who dealt with all the bladder control issues and became DL later on is that there is a wealth of information available here that you just can't find on normal IC only sites. There's enough people who are into the ABDL side of things that we can get updates on new products, we can talk openly about what works or doesn't in terms of said products, and there is no shame. Personally, I get bored with normal medical grade diapers, so I'm grateful that the market exists for colors, prints and patterns. I tried IC-only websites for a while and it seemed like many there were deathly afraid of 'resorting to' using diapers, let alone find a way to move on with enjoying life even though you deal with IC.

 

[SoggyGolfer]

It looks like a majority of abdl people say they became IC after they where abdl first. Which for me seems absurd. Of course there are large numbers of abdl people who became IC afterword. And some of them are legitimate. But how many who just like to say it (faking it)? No one really knows but I bet most of them just like to say it. Obviously there are abdl's that became after a SCI (apologies for the legitimate ones). Aside from the original question, how many SCI/abdl's still enjoy their diapers?

I've always been IC. And I don't identify myself as abdl. To be honest I just don't know how many abdl/IC are legitimate. But I think it's rare.

I’m not IC and don’t want to be, just recreational DL. I would think though that a from birth IC person would find a lot of comfort and acceptance from the ABDL community. Not a big jump from there to becoming AB or DL.

 

[hbic60]

I’m not IC and don’t want to be, just recreational DL. I would think though that a from birth IC person would find a lot of comfort and acceptance from the ABDL community. Not a big jump from there to becoming AB or DL.

I don't get this point; being myself UIC I've learned - as most other IC here - to accept my condition, find a solution (mostly diapers) which works best in daily life and how to deal with this physically and emotionally. In some way most of us are OK with wearing diapers, I myself go so far that I even rather like than hate the protection that I have to use, it's sometimes even convenient to wear them, but I have no tendency at all do become a DL or - for me absolutely unthinkable - AB.
Diapers are for me in no way a kind of fetish object, I have nothing in mind with being aroused, ashamed, or humiliated by someone, or having fear being discovered, or to be too shy to buy diapers in a store - and part of acceptance of diapers as best solution for IC is to see them NOT in any connection with babies or babyish behavior, I strictly deny this!

The only connection between IC and ABDL I see is that we wear diapers. So all topics about the products, the usage of them, where to buy, maybe also a very few emotional issues could be seen as common ones. But even there I see significant differences - as much as I read in Adult Diaper section, diapers have to be as thick as possible, of course only plastic backed ones are the true ones, for AB they must have additional babyish prints on them or to be in pink or other colors - and for IC people they have to be only as absorbent as needed, as discreet as possible, often breathable CF is important for skin care as you have to wear 24/7.

So, if there wouldn't be a relatively strict separation between IC, DL and AB here on ADISC I won't be a member here. But don't misunderstand me - I fully tolerate ABDL people, everyone has the full right to live his/her lifestyle in the own way, as long as there is no harm to others (and themselves) and I've also seen some very valuable comments of ABDL here in IC forum - but sometimes posts from that end are frustrating, having to explain that with IC not a dream came true and so on - and sometimes it's even more appropriate to hit the "Report" button...

 

[greatlake5]

I don't get this point; being myself UIC I've learned - as most other IC here - to accept my condition, find a solution (mostly diapers) which works best in daily life and how to deal with this physically and emotionally.

It's sometimes irritated to see some of these comments. No real harm. No reason to report. Easier to simply ignore. Move on.

I fully tolerate ABDL people, everyone has the full right to live his/her lifestyle in the own way, as long as there is no harm to others (and themselves) and I've also seen some very valuable comments of ABDL here in IC forum - but sometimes posts from that end are frustrating

Not only do I tolerate them, some of them are really nice people and I communicate with them. But I admit that sometimes I'm just having a rough day
and I let it get to me. I'm trying to think before I post. I'm getting better.

If something really irritates you, simply post "inappropriate" and move on.

 

[enthusi]

So this is turning out to be an unbelievably fascinating thread. Here’s the salient points as I see them:

• There are a lot of people on here who identified as ABDLs prior to becoming incontinent. Whether that’s suspicious, or suggestive that ABDLs are more predisposed to incontinence remains unclear.
• One thing that is clear is that the this forum is more “diaper-friendly” than other incontinence forums. For better and for worse.
• ABDLs are subject matter experts when it comes to diapers. While they (we) can provide useful resources and be a source of support, they don’t always appreciate the emotional struggles that come with coping with incontinence and especially having to wear a diaper. At best it’s a minor annoyance, at worst, it can be highly off-putting.
• Those of us who frequent here are loyal and are invested in seeing it continue to be a positive inclusive experience, as long as the people are following the guidelines.

Did I miss anything ?

 

[CheshireCat]

I guess in a way I'm surprised that non-ABDL IC people are willing to post here at all but it seems like on most other places on the internet people are afraid to talk about wearing diapers at all which seems like it would make it difficult to actually discuss practical aspects of how to deal with that, so hopefully it fills some sort of niche and serves a useful purpose there, I guess?

I have been involved in several U-IC oriented forums over nearly 27 years. Some were invaded by ABDLs, which ultimately led to their demise. Later forums, having learned from the invasions, suspected everybody about ABDL tendencies. If the main admin believed that diapers were taboo, then anyone who stated anything positive about diapers was immediately booted for being an ABDL. So, many incontinence forums are intolerant of anyone who doesn't follow their preferred ways of dealing with incontinence. Meanwhile, ADISC has a much less regulated Incontinence Forum, but there are many in the adjacent forums who are intolerant of those who are IC only. If you read through the threads/postings in the Incontinence Forum there are numerous times where non IC people question why there is even an Incontinence Forum on ADISC. ADISC is an abbreviation and the "I" stands for Incontinence.
ADISC > The AB/DL/IC Support Community

I’m not IC and don’t want to be, just recreational DL. I would think though that a from birth IC person would find a lot of comfort and acceptance from the ABDL community. Not a big jump from there to becoming AB or DL.

That is such a clueless statement. Are you even reading what IC people say on this forum or are you just interjecting nonsense? For many in this forum, their incontinence is a result of serious illness or injury; their incontinence is a symptom, not the condition. Read the header at the top of every page of the Incontinence Forum and follow it, please.

 

[greatlake5]

Read the header at the top of every page of the Incontinence Forum and follow it, please.

Some people simply do not read the header. Like I've said, anyone is free to read this forum (IC). Posting it needs respect. Most of us just ignore some of the "nonsense." Thanks Cat for reminding some of the members who are not IC.

 

[SoggyGolfer]

Some people simply do not read the header. Like I've said, anyone is free to read this forum (IC). Posting it needs respect. Most of us just ignore some of the "nonsense." Thanks Cat for reminding some of the members who are not IC.

Your very correct! I apologize!!!

 

[hbic60]

So this is turning out to be an unbelievably fascinating thread. Here’s the salient points as I see them:

• One thing that is clear is that the this forum is more “diaper-friendly” than other incontinence forums. For better and for worse.

I fully agree!

• ABDLs are subject matter experts when it comes to diapers. While they (we) can provide useful resources and be a source of support, they don’t always appreciate the emotional struggles that come with coping with incontinence and especially having to wear a diaper. At best it’s a minor annoyance, at worst, it can be highly off-putting.
  
  
• Those of us who frequent here are loyal and are invested in seeing it continue to be a positive inclusive experience, as long as the people are following the guidelines.

ABDL maybe are really experts for diapers for their purposes - but, as I said before, many IC have different recommendations for the diapers they need, and sometimes it's an annoying discussion that not the thickest, loudest, most absorbent 11.000 ml diaper is the best one you can think of. But anyway, as I said before, I've also seen very good and valuable, fruitful comments from ABDL people here in IC forum, respecting the guidelines, which I really appreciate and which I don't want to miss!

 

[anned]

bed wetter till age 12. A DL til age 56 and then i had a number of autoimmune disorders and urgency and back problems. i started wearing most of the time when out during the day. In 2020 i had Fournier's gangrene and became IC.
I will never be out of diapers for the rest of my life.
And that does not bother me in the least.

 

[SeniorMan]

I didn't begin to diaper up as an adult until I entered my nursing home at age 69. Being diapered solved the problem of pooping and wetting accidents I had suffered for many years. So, I had incontinence before I knew about diapers. I now diaper up for pleasure.