getting spanked isn't as fun as you may imagine.

[ABCoder]

I booked with an AB sitter (110$) and also asked her to spank me.

it's basically just an unpleasant stinging sensation. she used OTK, belt, and that horse cane.
very disappointing.

for quit a while I've wondered what can an AB sitter do that an AI sitter can't
and spanking was the main thing, but it's pretty lame.

I still feel it the day after, especially when I run, kind of feels like a strained muscle and somewhat stingy.

 

[Khaymen]

There is more than one type of spanking. You would need to negotiate a sample session to determine what would appeal to you to include position and implement and if you would enjoy a stingy or thuddie sensation.



Of course, you'll also need to determine if this is something you'll enjoy, ... in the end.

 

[ABCoder]

There is more than one type of spanking. You would need to negotiate a sample session to determine what would appeal to you to include position and implement and if you would enjoy a stingy or thuddie sensation.



Of course, you'll also need to determine if this is something you'll enjoy, ... in the end.

I got a whole spectrum of them, bare and diapered. it's pretty lame.

 

[Ceras]

It might just be you're not as into spanking as you might have thought. My mommy gives me all kinds of spankings and paddlings and I always love it.

 

[PrinnyAB]

I'd love to hear more about this AI Sitter you spoke of

 

[diaperedjustin]

I love getting spanked, especially with a messy diaper.

 

[BoundCoder]

Lot of stuff is better in your head than in reality, but I've also found the inverse to be true.

Entirely possible spanking isn't your thing, but if you're not ready to write it off completely, maybe consider what it is about the idea that appealed to you in the first place and ask whether your experience was tailored to that. There can be a lot of nuance to this stuff.

Personally I'm heavier into the bondage and sadism side of the spectrum, but somewhat paradoxically not really into the masochism side of things. The idea of being truly helpless and brought to actual legitimate uncontrollable tears very much appeals to me. Unfortunately I have a decent pain threshold and actually making that fantasy a reality is a challenge I've yet to figure out (due to the physical/emotional risks involved that's not the kind of thing you can easily just pay for, and you know.. physical and emotional risks..). That said, when I do a considerably more tame spanking scene, that's where I'm trying to get my head space. A little tap on the bum with a ridding crop probably isn't gonna do much for me either.

Either way, I wouldn't totally write off playing with other humans just because spanking wasn't you're thing. There's a whole world of kinky stuff to explore, and a lot of it is a lot more fun with another person. Maybe someday ChatGPT can stick you in a straight jacket but we're not /quite/ there yet..

 

[Labrador]

for quit a while I've wondered what can an AB sitter do that an AI sitter can't

Is that “adult infant?” Or are you being babysat by a robot?

 

[AlwaysDreaming]

Like others have said, spanking just might not be your thing. And that's okay!

Spanking is something that has found its way into my every day dynamic with my Daddy - but not as 'play', as actual punishment. We are in a soft 24/7 TPE(total power exchange) type relationship (I'm not 24/7 littlespace but I am 24/7 submissive ). I'm not a fan of the actual spanking, but I absolutely ADORE the dynamic it enforces. Being chased around the house, put over his knee, firmly explained what I did wrong and why I'm being punished, and being forced to apologize after and even thank him for the spanking makes me feel very little and subby in the best way. The actual spanking part? Yah, not my favorite. That's why for me it's a punishment.

It's possible that you might enjoy spanking in a different setting or with different motivation. The chemistry and trust between you and your playmate can also make a big impact on how enjoyable something is. I would have never let my past babysitters or my ex spank me, but it pushes different buttons doing it with my current partner.

It's totally okay if you just don't like it though! There are plenty of other punishments that could help enforce your little space if that's what you're after. Perhaps standing in a corner or sitting on the naughty step or writing lines would work better for you if that is something you want to explore. Not everything you try will be a success, but it was brave of you for giving it a go. At least now you know a bit more about yourself.

Also, canes are no joke and I hope the sore muscles go away soon!

 

[BabyDenise]

Based on many of the posts on ADISC, many people do like to be spanked. Most don't elaborate on the type of spanking just that they like it.

I haven't been spanked since I was young and don't think I would like it as anything more than a light swat.

 

[BigKid25]

I booked with an AB sitter (110$) and also asked her to spank me.

it's basically just an unpleasant stinging sensation. she used OTK, belt, and that horse cane.
very disappointing.

for quit a while I've wondered what can an AB sitter do that an AI sitter can't
and spanking was the main thing, but it's pretty lame.

I still feel it the day after, especially when I run, kind of feels like a strained muscle and somewhat stingy.

So far people have made great comments on the types of spankings out there. It could also be that the AB sitter doesn't have her skills dialed in. It's kink 101 to build clear communication, expectation, implementation, and after care. Sometimes people who are paid aren't into giving it very much, so they think they're just supposed to hit you and dirty talk you on how bad you've been, but there's a LOT more nuance to it.

Is it playful, therapeutic, or both? What was the build up like? What was the rate/speed and power? Was there ongoing communication throughout or did you resign yourself because you thought you were supposed to after you started? Did you get to cuddle afterwards and have some relief cream put on your sore spots? A spanking between partners only really works if you both know the other person cares about you and enjoys it. Otherwise it's just someone hitting you because you asked them to.

I admit I haven't been spanked as an adult so I may be living in my own fantasy world, but I've seen enough of my fair share of spanking videos to be pretty tuned into what I want. It'd have to:
- include someone I trust.
- have a soft but firm talk about why you're being spanked. The quiet confidence and calm control is suuuuuper sexy.
- be undressed slowly with some gentle but firm carressing on the thighs and butt to start to build up a sensual connection to know that everyone is safe and in control.
- be pulled over a knee and across the bed so you can lay with your butt popped into the air and not be dangling in the air trying to fight for breath,
- have some alternating between light warm up slips on the back thighs and diaper while rubbing in between strikes to let you know this is about enjoying and connecting,
- gradually start to pull off tapes (or pull down the pull up) and make the slaps more pronounced on the bare butt.
- build up momentum while holding the waist tight to the spankers waist to maintain support.
- find a good stopping point hy slowing down just a bit and checking to see if the spankee 'learned their lesson' (code phrase for, had enough).

If they're done, start soothing all the sore spots with some gentle rubbing, and even a little back rub, before putting some ointment on the sore skin and taping back on the diaper. Then finish off with a hug and cuddle session to let all that pain melt away and know that you're still loved.

If you don't have THAT level of specificity for what you're into and your partner doesn't fully understand all the pieces at play, the ignorance certainly doesn't bring bliss. It becomes a messy awkward experience of people not honoring every aspect of the whole process as a way to connect with each other. I know I couldn't do cane or someone just smacking the hell out of me because it would lose the ultimate goal: having someone give me a vulnerable and safe enough space to give up control to them.

 

[BobaFettish]

If it's not your thing you don't have to yuck someone's yum.

I'm into impact play, especially when it overlaps with Ageplay.

I didn't realize until the last few years that I have a bit of a brat streak in me. I'll ask my Big if they are right or left handed, and maybe they should swing with that arm.

I will laugh and razz them. Then it gets to a point just passed "I'm not laughing any more" or "this isn't as funny as it just was", then everything goes quiet in my mind and no moment exist except for this moment. Somewhere between that and then tapping you out or safe wording out is the sweet spot.
I've been a musician before and impact scenes are the closest to how I felt on stage. There is no moment but this moment.

Then aftercare with my Big/Top. I'll get to a point where I'm non verbal, which for me being a talkative person feels good. Most of the time Little headspace is like glancing blows, like that hit the Little nerve. During aftercare, after an impact scene, I'm submersed in Littlespace.

I love how a diaper feels on my spanked butt. I like having the "souvenirs" for a few days to a week.

 

[BobaFettish]

This was a birthday gift. The Hot Wheels track paddle.

 

[Belarin]

There's been some great replies here already so I won't have much to add other than reiterate that there are so many different ways to spank a person, even ignoring all the possible tools and implements available, just simply going on how and where the spanking is given, what started it, how long/hard/fast, how much control the spankee has, if there is any role play, aftercare, communication...

As simple examples:

• A spanking from a caregiver (like a pro nanny) who you have asked for a spanking from during pre-play discussion is going to feel completely different than exactly the same kind/level of spanking from the same CG who has simply decided you need a spanking without being asked for it in advance. It is then unexpected and thus out of your control so it has more of a shock factor.
• A CG who just simply pulls a naughty little over their knee, spanks them and leaves it at that will feel completely different from the exact same spanking but when the CG has spoken with and reprimanded the little about the inappropriateness their behaviour before the spanking, given it and then spoken more about why they got it and what they could do better in the future.
• A spanking from someone you don't know well but have paid to be a CG for a day has much less impact than the exact same spanking you receive from a loved one or close partner who is doing it because they love you and want you to be better.

And so on, there are many things that can affect how a spanking feels to a person that have nothing to do with the actual impacts themselves, a spanking for a spankings sake is pointless for an AB or little, this is a heavily emotion driven kink and so we need that deeper purpose with the right setting, mood, motivation, cause and connection.

The idea of being truly helpless and brought to actual legitimate uncontrollable tears very much appeals to me. Unfortunately I have a decent pain threshold and actually making that fantasy a reality is a challenge

This is actually something I can really connect with, I would love that experience of truly being spanked to real tears and sobbing uncontrollably over a caregivers knee but I also have a pretty good pain threshold. I also think it's about much more than just the pain though.

If it is being given for the right reason, for behaviour or something you have actually legitimately done wrong, from someone who you truly care about their opinion of you and who you have a deep connection with, in those instances a spanking can have much more of an emotional impact than a physical one and thus more likely to bring you to tears, not because it hurts, but because of the understanding and knowledge of what you have done and that you upset a person you care for.

Spanking is something that has found its way into my every day dynamic with my Daddy - but not as 'play', as actual punishment. We are in a soft 24/7 TPE(total power exchange) type relationship (I'm not 24/7 littlespace but I am 24/7 submissive ). I'm not a fan of the actual spanking, but I absolutely ADORE the dynamic it enforces. Being chased around the house, put over his knee, firmly explained what I did wrong and why I'm being punished, and being forced to apologize after and even thank him for the spanking makes me feel very little and subby in the best way. The actual spanking part? Yah, not my favorite. That's why for me it's a punishment.

This is the kind of thing I'd aim for. I love both giving and receiving a good spanking, I understand fully that not everyone is into it and if I'm being a CG for someone who isn't I can find other options.

It is in my mind the difference between a "punishment" and a "funishment".
A punishment is something you are given, whatever the reason, timing or severity, it is decided for you. You have done something wrong and are being corrected, there is no choice in the matter you earned what you get (whether it is just a light tap on the bum as a warning or a serious spanking).

Whereas a funishment is something you want to have and can ask for either through words or deeds. It can be light and playful or hard and painful whatever you desire, you will have some control over how much you get and when it ends.

But as a personal preference I would want a relationship where whoever was being the big/little (me or my partner) understands that spankings can and will be given for certain levels of "bad/inappropriate behaviour" whether you like/want them or not. Given in that same way: Discussion/explanation, Choice, waiting time to build anticipation, the spanking itself with whatever implements chosen, apologies/thanks, cuddles and aftercare.

There is no need in this instance to "ask" for the spanking, it is simply understood that the possibility is always there and simple behavioural cues and in depth knowledge of each other can trigger it.

Also, and this only works with a partner I was very close to, I would need the acceptance that there is no safe word or key words or options to misbehave and say "no I don't want the spanking today do something else" (dangerous thing to say in the world of kink since there should always be some control element). This is because both of us should know each others limits and with a real punishment you would not be able to say "ok stop now I've had enough" and have it immediately end or "no I don't want that punishment choose another".

Because the purpose of a punishment is to correct a behaviour by doing something you don't want (negative vs positive reinforcement). This brings a little bit more fear of "omg how far are they going to go" and more anticipation into the mix making things feel much more real.

 

[Anemone]

Nothing is as fun as one may imagine.

Personally I'm pretty pain adverse but the occasional swat does something for me, reinforcing the dynamic and helping the headspace.

On the other hand (hehe, I'm so clever) I can imagine few things less pleasant than paying to have someone deliver a smorgasbord of different spanks divorced of context.

There are things I can enjoy for their own sake but spanking is not one of them, perhaps the problem was that the situation itself was not as fun as imagined?

Of course there is also taste to consider, it's not for everyone and that's okay.

 

[BobaFettish]

As I mentioned I am into impact play, but have a high pain tolerance. I really want to be beat to tears.

I had an ex Big that after spanking good with a crop, she dropped an "I love you" in the same way a parent did when I was a kid during aftercare, and that broke me. I ugly cried. Sometimes those Little, Kink, and Trauma nerves are all in the same zip code.

 

[Spankedanddiapered]

I can tell you this about spanking. If you’re not into it you’re not gonna talk yourself into it. when it comes to getting a spanking, I’ve had many but the best ones are from those who are actually what we would call spankso. There’s a lot of dynamics to creating the scene. there’s ability for the spanker to identify responses As well as communication between both the spanker and the Spanky ahead of time to truly understand what it is a need and want . my experience has been that my best spankings were from those who are into it, and had received them themselves I think there’s a lot of professionals that don’t understand the dynamics of it. They just think all you need to do is beat someone’s ass and on the surface that’s true. But unless you understand the dynamics in that person’s head, it’s varied like the diaper fetish too. my wife has tried it many times she enjoys it at times during sex. A good firm pat on the butt, but she is not at all into a disciplinary spanking like I am. It is very hard to explain, but for me a real spanking for real reasons that leave my butt sometimes black and blue is very cathartic for me. I think in your case you’re not into it but you’ve seen others particularly in the diaper community that are and say I’ll give it a try. Nothing wrong with that but I think it comes down to the way you’re wired I’m just wired that way. my wife is not. For me, this desire began probably before puberty or maybe around puberty, but much like the diaper fetish for me. I have tried many times to shake it and forget it, and it always comes back. After many years, now I am in a situation where I wear diapers regularly without any guilt, and I am disciplined when I get out of of line. I’m pretty content with it now, and certainly less embarrassed of it. So, your statement that it was lame means it probably wasn’t for you simply because you’re not wired for it. I think the same could be said for me and cross-dressing Or being an adult, baby I’ve been forced to wear women’s clothes and underwear,. I’ve also been forced to wear baby clothes and drink from a bottle and suck a pacifier, but it has done nothing for me. I don’t enjoy it. I don’t get aroused by it it’s not comforting I think I understand how others might feel different. It’s really comes down to the way we’re wired, and that happens I think at a very young age, usually before puberty. I don’t think science has even figured out why but we’re all so different in our heads. I mean look at the difference between all the Dls and ABsI don’t think anyone is the same and their desires and fantasies. We are all uniquely different.

 

[feetintrouble]

I enjoy being spanked as a little, but it has to be done right. I don't like it if it's too cruel or painful (unless I am well warmed up and regressed). My most important consideration is that it is NOT similar to how I received spankings as an actual child, some of which I am still angry about. I don't like being spanked as an actual punishment for an actual adult offence, as that is too close to reality, but I love to play up as a little, to disobey in small ways, see what I can get away with, and feel the fear of the punishment of a smacked bottom. I don't like pre-spanking scoldings, but I enjoy being berated during a spanking, made to promise to be good. I like my bottom to be smacked bare, over the knee, with a slipper, paddle, or brush. I love the pink bum and afterglow which follows, more than the actual pain. Here are some of my favourite things about a smacked bottom:
- Being threatened with a smacked bottom at the beginning of little time, to help me regress, and to set the scene of who is in charge.
- My caregiver sitting on a chair or bed, with the implement in her hand, beckoning me towards her.
- By a babysitter who spanks me because she can, using the slippers or flip flops she wears especially for babysitting. I was once thrilled to hear "my slipper is winking at me".
- By an older sister who is resentful about having to look after me.
- School role play (I often attend events like this). I enjoy being grassed on if I'm playing up.
- Imagining my caregiver's expression of fierce concentration.
- Defiantly telling myself that it won't hurt that much, and feeling the smile being wiped off my face as the nasty slipper or brush burns my bottom.
- On my birthday, because it is bad luck not to have my bottom warmed.
- To "get the devil out of me" in the form of good, clean pain.
- A bedtime spanking, especially if I am slow getting ready for bed, or am cheeky to my caregiver.
- Punishment for the year's sins, before Christmas.
- Being blindfolded and made to guess what is being used to spank me.
- Hearing "I will make you cry", "you'll be crying yourself to sleep", or "are you crying yet?". (I don't actually cry, but I love the threat.)

 

[KBoy]

It's not going to be exciting without relationship dynamics. When we first started domestic discipline I got a lot of just because spankings, but as things progressed and correction spanking became the normal thing in our marriage, it became more interesting.
As far as variety, there's her sound spanking and then there is her "i'm so sorry Mammy!" bare bottom butt blistering, OTK or bent over the naughty chair, her choice.
I have been under my wife's thumb for many years now and I mind pretty good, but it is still comforting to know that her fanny paddle is hanging in the closet in case I really need for her calm me down

 

[BobaFettish]

My parents definitely beat me, but I don't think it started there for me.
When I was 15 my family moved from a midsize city to the small town my pops was from.
The school used corporal punishment. The first time I got "licks" I got called to the front of the room and told to put my hands on the teachers desk. After the first hit with the paddle, I moaned unintentionally. The entire class laughed. Teacher hit me harder. It scratched all the itches.
After that I kept trying to find ways to get licks without my parents getting called. I'd get licks at least 2 or 3 times a week. Coach had the best swing. The Shop teacher had the best paddle.