Rant

[LittleAndAlone]

. To me, it's kind of scary to think about. This is the generation that's going to grow up to be our doctors, lawyers, nurses, managers, police officers, hospice workers... .

No. They will grow up flipping burgers, needing to watch a youtube video each day to know how. And they will be demanding $100 hr plus handouts to do so because they have to keep up with Lamborghini flaunting Jones' they also watch on youtube. Who they also think is their best friend.

Those other careers don't exist anymore. There is only NFL/NBA star, rapper, or "youtuber".

Many of the parents you see don't want kids, what they wanted was sex sex sex sex sex sex. Even when they can't afford the consequences they continue to do it.

And US schools are just indoctrination camps anymore.

This nation is done.

 

[chamberpot]

MY MY what an interesting read, we are all adults after all. I hesitate to respond. I am 1 of 4 siblings, I fathered and raise 5 children, I have 7 grands and one great grand, every single one of us has our own mind and way of doing things, being taught, told, coached or beaten into doing what those before us thought was right. Mostly we all are doing ok, I don't know but what I know

 

[DLWee]

Thank you PrettyLilPrincess and everyone that has contributed to a very good read. Parent to 2 teenagers here and I'm with you PrettyLilPrincess. Things have changed and are continuing to change. And not in a positive way.
The way parents are parking children in front of technology and not interacting with them is horrifying. Has anyone seen "The Social Dilemma" on Netflix I believe? Try watching it, or at least read about it.

The scene painted by the OP and in the subsequent comments reminds me of something that I witnessed over 10 years ago in a Chicco shop (child clothing and other paraphernalia). My wife was choosing clothing, my children were playing in the children's corner and I was looking at the technological improvement in prams and pushchairs that had occurred since we had bought for our children.
This young family (parents and 9 year old daughter) came in asking about pushchairs.
They wanted a pushchair for their perfectly healthy 9 year old. There was quite a long discussion between the parents and the sales assistant, so unless the parents were not being totally open their was nothing wrong with their 9 year old. The reason given (with no apparent shame) was that it was easier to manage their daughter in the pushchair than let her walk.
They left after having been told in no uncertain terms by the store manager (who had been called to help in the discussions) that using a pushchair for a 9 year old wasn't healthy. The only suggestion was to go to an orthopedic shop and order something medical as their pushchairs were not certified for the weight.

I know. One example among millions, but that experience set the scene for many musings and thoughts with my wife over the state of modern parenting.

 

[SpAzpieSweeTot]

If you can get your bands on it, there's a documentary called The Kids We lose. Watch it. Be advised, those with trauma histories, or who have kids in hard places, may not be able to get through it. Try.

This is interesting to sit with and chew on. By the time a bad behavior happens, the cause for it, has already happened, so why are we focused on behaviors? Unsolved problems cause bad behavior. Lagging skills cause unsolved problems. People are challenging, when they have difficulty meeting expectations.

Solve the problems, realistically, collaboratively, proactively and mutually satisfactorily. This is Dr. Ross Greene's model.

I haven't been able to find enough information on PBIS, to make me feel comfortable using it, and I've seen too many teachers cry, and quit teaching, over something to do with it.

What I think it is that bothers me about PBIS, is this. Positive reinforcement works really well, in animals who will never be expected to speak, because species. By far, PR is best for humans, if you're going to use behaviorism, but I wonder if using behaviorism is damaging us.

This is why I like Dr. Greene's CPS, better. It works for the kids in what would be called tier 2 and 3 in PBIS, without doing damage to the kids who aren't developmentally delayed in the domains of flexibility, adaptability, problem solving, frustration tolerance, and emotional regulation.

Restorative Practices, I have less problem with than PBIS. I have more research to do.

Non behaviorist approaches have positive behavioral effects, without focusing on it. Dr. Becky Kennedy said something similar to if people are going to do this, it has to be as clear as behaviorism, or clearer. I'm paraphrasing.

Non behaviorist approaches are new, that it's scary. B.F. Skinner got away with scary stuff too.