Never thought...

[Boo]

that I'd end up in this section but here I am, ever since I started to get into my regression more, I found myself gravitating towards a fem baby boy headspace. Many factors caused me to make it to this conclusion,

I read a blog about a sissy baby that is so ridiculous, that it's most likely satirical or heavily edited for privacy while I was trying to reconcile my little side and I recall having a mix of disgust and fear that i'd end up becoming a full on sissy baby, this was before I found out what a little was. This was last summer.

Then in fall, I read about this ABDL who kept his side repressed for years, and this was even with his wife accepting and encouraging him, he listened to the Dream A Little podcast and because of the pandemic and quarantine, decided to try being an ABDL again and he made leaps and bounds in accepting himself, then he later gravitated towards a girly baby headspace and style, seeing his outfits set forth a change in me.

There was this other ABDL who explored his regression and then later found out that he was firmly a girl in his headspace and his CG helped explore his regression.

Anyways, I have loads of more questions, but this has gotten me thinking about achieving my ultimate form as an ABDL, I bought a few dresses, pink outfits, a wig and things like that, I want to lose weight and take care of some things first before I delve into it. but I admit, the urge is hard, I want to be a boyish little as well but part of me feels like I belong in frilly dresses and tights and pink outfits with a wig. It helps that I look androgynous and that I act feminine sometimes when I'm big

Anybody have the same journey as me?

 

[Cottontail]

Anybody have the same journey as me?

Not the same journey, but perhaps a similar destination. If you’re saying you feel firmly male while “adulting,” but lean female when little, I can definitely relate. For me, the toddler girl role just makes me feel especially little. I don’t have any dresses or other girl clothing, but I do have cloth diapers and pacifiers with girl designs. They do the trick for me.

 

[Boo]

Not the same journey, but perhaps a similar destination. If you’re saying you feel firmly male while “adulting,” but lean female when little, I can definitely relate. For me, the toddler girl role just makes me feel especially little. I don’t have any dresses or other girl clothing, but I do have cloth diapers and pacifiers with girl designs. They do the trick for me.

I mean, little me is somewhat gender fluid. Sometimes I want to wear a boyish onesie and play with boyish toys, so I'm a girly baby boy

 

[Luminaire]

Definitely still working the 'accepting yourself' part of things. My inner child is definitely female. I've loved girly clothing since I was probably ten or so. Sometimes I'm little girl mode with a pair of shortalls and a pink shirt. Other times I'm in full sissy mode with a pink satin dress, poofy petticoat, tights, ruffle socks, and satin gloves. I can try and rationalize why I do what I do, but at the end of the day, I'm simply me and there's no changing that.

My last therapist told me I was trans and that I'd only be happy if I physically transitioned. I thought about it for a while and realized that I could never physically be the girl I see inside myself. Plus I'd lose everything in my life that I love. So I compromised and decided that I can be the big manly man when they need it, and the soft little girl when I need it. It's not perfect, but life rarely is.

 

[Seasonedcitizen]

What if you are not happy after surgery? Are you going to under go the surgery to make you physically less than the male you are now? There are people who live female while still having their male parts. Think about this for a long time. You have figured out the middle ground of being a part time woman and enjoying it. The majority of CD’s have found this to be the best way to balance our male and female sides.

 

[Luminaire]

What if you are not happy after surgery? Are you going to under go the surgery to make you physically less than the male you are now? There are people who live female while still having their male parts. Think about this for a long time. You have figured out the middle ground of being a part time woman and enjoying it. The majority of CD’s have found this to be the best way to balance our male and female sides.

100%. I think people are, in general, too quick to make permanent changes to themselves without thinking things through. It's easy to quickly make emotional decisions without really, in that moment, being able to comprehend or analyse the long-term consequences. I thought long and hard about whether I'd even be happy as a transwoman. I'm basically an ogre. It would take a lot of work, surgery, and money to even get close to passing and even then I'd likely fall short. I'd also have sacrificed my job, my family, and my relationships in the process. In the end the cost was far too great for something that may not, in the end, be enough to satisfy my needs. Compromise was the answer for me. I can work on my physical fitness to feel better about myself as a man. I can still be a loving husband and father. I can still be a little girl when I need to be to nurture my inner child.

My answer was right for me. It may not be for others struggling with the same choices. It all comes down to careful logical consideration for the future as well as the present.

 

[Boo]

I also wanted to add this, I act feminine sometimes and I have a somewhat feminine voice, also people said I look androgynous, also I was told that I look like a girl in my baby pictures as well.

 

[GoodniteLover219]

Anybody have the same journey as me?

I guess I have a similar journey too, though mine's a bit different if not somewhat difficult to comprehend.

See, my own history actually began when I just started going through puberty at age eleven. It was the age where I started feeling different and strange, hair was starting to grow in places I wished they didn't grow, and to top it all off- I never was a rambunctious teen boy like everyone else.

I was more of either the bookworm or just the one who wanted to do good. I wasn't even going through that phase where I'd started thinking about sex and girls; though at that time (Especially at age thirteen) the dreams and thoughts of me wanting to be a girl did attract me- but not in the sexual fetish kinky way. More like- "I just wish I could experience the life of a young girl."

Back through the rest of my teen to mid-adult life, I always imagined all of this revolved around my disability (Autism) and that may be true; but with all do honesty to me it was more than just a sigh from my disability. I thought it was more along the lines of- "Maybe I was born in the wrong gender and maybe I am indeed trans." Or maybe it was along the lines of- "Well, I like being myself; but I love being feminine so much that I want to have a split personality of sorts."

In my opinion, I'd say it would be the first. It's not like I'm super unhappy being myself; but there are a lot of things about myself I'm not too happy or proud of and wished I'd change them or at least be different.

I think the point of my own story is- it's common for a lot of us to go through this; but I think at the end of it all if what you do and what you enjoy makes you happy; that's all that counts.