Has incontinence ever stopped you from doing something you really wanted to do?

[ballyhooser]

Old topic but here goes. Once I actually realized no one really cares about our 24/7 need for diapers or if you’re just a bedwetter in need. We have mostly a self imposed fear that we won’t be accepted by the world around us. Obvious almost all other forms of physical disabilities are simply accepted. Why do we live reluctantly hiding from this one? That’s a rhetorical question, of course, since I came from that secluded area of life also.
Do you want to live a worry free life, or not? That’s your choice. I had the benefit of having been embarrassingly exposed in college. I was a transfer student my first year but had developed a circle of friends that all lived on campus. They strongly encouraged me to join them so second year I thought I would. Of course I always thought with the right challenge I could will my body to stop wetting the bed every night. I knew I could handle my daytime leaking issues so I’d be ok there. The very first week in my dorm I was in my friends room next to mine and we were smoking, getting high, and drinking beer. I was sitting on my friends bed and just laid back. I fell asleep and woke up maybe 20 minutes later as all five of them were laughing hysterically as I had soaked my pants, and his bed. The look on my face told the story and my friend (well they were all friends) but the bed I soaked said hey man don’t worry about it. Another one said yeah don’t worry “puddles”.
Anyway next day I met all of them at our usual lunch table and as I approached one of them said hi there puddles! I simply said hi back and had the immediate sense these were friends and this issue wasn’t any big deal to them. From then on that was my nickname and anytime someone new would ask “why puddles?” One of my friends would matter of factly reply, “because he wets the bed”. Very maturely and in a dismissing and disarming tone that almost everyone reacted with a well ok response. My friends truly had my back.
As time went on I always remember those friends of mine that has always helped me with the perspective, other people really don’t care!

 

[Jellyfish]

I enjoy overnight hiking trips and managing my IC while also covering a lot of ground is a challenge. It limits how far or how many nights I can go out in a row. There are several considerations, like the extra space in my pack I need for clean diapers and supplies. Then, I need to pack out my used diapers which means my bag is getting heavier as the hike goes on. You’re essentially having to carry all of the water you are drinking in swollen diapers in a compression sack.

Hygiene quickly becomes an issue. After an active day of hiking (and heavy wetting) and my tent is set up for the night, I’ll experience a bigger issue: my night time fecal incontinence. So I wake up with a loaded diaper, enjoy the sunrise, make my coffee, and then I have to deal with that. I use a trowel to dig a hole for the contents, use the diaper to get what I can, then use wipes. It’s not nearly as thorough as a bath, but I change and then pack my dirty stuff in the compression sack.

My maximum seems to be three nights in a row, after that my pack is too heavy, my back is sore, and my scent is warding off bears! So incontinence doesn’t stop me from backcountry hiking completely but it limits my potential for achievement of longer trips.

The core of a disposable diaper is biodegradable, so you can break open a wet diaper and bury the contents just like you would a BM. That way you only have to pack out the outer shell and inner lining - virtually nothing and your pack gets lighter as you go. In this way you are only limited by how many clean diapers you carry in.

 

[Lethdale]

Reach the pan...

 

[Edgewater]

Old topic but here goes. Once I actually realized no one really cares about our 24/7 need for diapers or if you’re just a bedwetter in need. We have mostly a self imposed fear that we won’t be accepted by the world around us. Obvious almost all other forms of physical disabilities are simply accepted. Why do we live reluctantly hiding from this one? That’s a rhetorical question, of course, since I came from that secluded area of life also.
Do you want to live a worry free life, or not? That’s your choice. I had the benefit of having been embarrassingly exposed in college. I was a transfer student my first year but had developed a circle of friends that all lived on campus. They strongly encouraged me to join them so second year I thought I would. Of course I always thought with the right challenge I could will my body to stop wetting the bed every night. I knew I could handle my daytime leaking issues so I’d be ok there. The very first week in my dorm I was in my friends room next to mine and we were smoking, getting high, and drinking beer. I was sitting on my friends bed and just laid back. I fell asleep and woke up maybe 20 minutes later as all five of them were laughing hysterically as I had soaked my pants, and his bed. The look on my face told the story and my friend (well they were all friends) but the bed I soaked said hey man don’t worry about it. Another one said yeah don’t worry “puddles”.
Anyway next day I met all of them at our usual lunch table and as I approached one of them said hi there puddles! I simply said hi back and had the immediate sense these were friends and this issue wasn’t any big deal to them. From then on that was my nickname and anytime someone new would ask “why puddles?” One of my friends would matter of factly reply, “because he wets the bed”. Very maturely and in a dismissing and disarming tone that almost everyone reacted with a well ok response. My friends truly had my back.
As time went on I always remember those friends of mine that has always helped me with the perspective, other people really don’t care!

I like your stance, but the majority of those who are IC here have been this way for a long enough time to come to accept the reality of wearing diapers and near all have accepted that as a reality! We are not hiding in our homes, but are out and about diapered everyday! In addition, among us are a large number that a limited to profoundly disabled and are also out and about.

Yes, those new to being IC are experiencing caution to stepping out the front door and are here to learn and become confident in taking those first few steps! With stances like yours and from the many more here they become trusting of their protection and take that next!

Enjoy the Sunlight on your face!!

 

[L2Sci]

I would say that since i am IC due to being an incomplete paraplegic, IC is just a part of the struggle not the full picture. Dors IC require additional prep/planning/packing, yes. But the wheelchair accessibility is my major obstacle.

 

[Diaperman95]

I would say that since i am IC due to being an incomplete paraplegic, IC is just a part of the struggle not the full picture. Dors IC require additional prep/planning/packing, yes. But the wheelchair accessibility is my major obstacle.

For sure. Incontinence sucks but there are other things in life that many of us have to overcome that makes wearing a diaper no big deal. I choose not to tell many folk but it is because I am more private than I am scared of what they might think. If any of them had to walk in our shoes (or roll on year wheels so to say)... what would they do different? You either accept life as it is and adapt or become depressed and bitter.
But that is real easy to say... Doing it takes the real courage.. and to be honest I have let depression in my life a lot the lost 6 or 7 years. But it is more do to constant illness not my underwear or my incontinence. People new to incontinence have no clue how well they have it today compared to 30 years ago. It saddens me when urologist and doctors do not inform people of the great options online over the store brands. I wish I could see and hear ten real incontinence commercials a day. I hear 100's of commercials for ED & the male clinic every day on the radio. My God if they can make that not a big deal why can't these diaper companies push to change the stigma?

 

[L2Sci]

For sure. Incontinence sucks but there are other things in life that many of us have to overcome that makes wearing a diaper no big deal. I choose not to tell many folk but it is because I am more private than I am scared of what they might think. If any of them had to walk in our shoes (or roll on year wheels so to say)... what would they do different? You either accept life as it is and adapt or become depressed and bitter.
But that is real easy to say... Doing it takes the real courage.. and to be honest I have let depression in my life a lot the lost 6 or 7 years. But it is more do to constant illness not my underwear or my incontinence. People new to incontinence have no clue how well they have it today compared to 30 years ago. It saddens me when urologist and doctors do not inform people of the great options online over the store brands. I wish I could see and hear ten real incontinence commercials a day. I hear 100's of commercials for ED & the male clinic every day on the radio. My God if they can make that not a big deal why can't these diaper companies push to change the stigma?

I cannot say I have truly "accepted" my disability, I have really struggle depression and still do. I do not go out much outside of work. Its even hard to convince myself to go to family dinners on holidays.

I also never tell anyone I am wearing. Heck I wear NS megamax because it come in black those incontrol fit better. I am embarrassed about being in a chair let alone IC.

"Someone always has it worse" is what gets me through.

 

[slimjiminy]

To the title question of this thread, YES! There are things now that make me think twice. Where before IC, I would just do.

When I became U-IC, I learned how to deal with it and over time I mostly accepted that. But when the F-IC started, it has thrown me a real curve ball. When I say F-IC, it is IBS-d (diarrhea). This seems to me about the worst kind of F-IC you can have especially when you combine that with the fact that it is unpredictable. It takes the most comprehensive diaper precautions to prevent it from leaking all over.

The greatest risk seems to be around food related events. So dining with friends is something I am very cautious about now and something that I would normally really want to do.

 

[Wetshisbed]

No I just get on with my life in nappies and plastic pants. If people notice them so what.

 

[Diaperman95]

To the title question of this thread, YES! There are things now that make me think twice. Where before IC, I would just do.

When I became U-IC, I learned how to deal with it and over time I mostly accepted that. But when the F-IC started, it has thrown me a real curve ball. When I say F-IC, it is IBS-d (diarrhea). This seems to me about the worst kind of F-IC you can have especially when you combine that with the fact that it is unpredictable. It takes the most comprehensive diaper precautions to prevent it from leaking all over.

The greatest risk seems to be around food related events. So dining with friends is something I am very cautious about now and something that I would normally really want to do.

Stay strong. F-ic sucks!! I 100% wish it upon everyone that loves to poop their pants and think they want to be incontinent. They will chang their story really quick how fun it is.

I am in the hospital yet again with a nasty kidney infection that stated from waking up last Monday in a diaper full of loose stool. All smeared up my front side and gave me a UTI. The meds they put me on did not work. So it got into the kidney. So Here I am laying in a hospital bed yet again.

So I 100% agree f-IC is 1000x worse than just bladder. It does stop you from doing some things. Just out of fear of how would I clean up without a restroom near by. And how many people are going to notice.

 

[Lethdale]

Stay strong. F-ic sucks!! I 100% wish it upon everyone that loves to poop their pants and think they want to be incontinent. They will chang their story really quick how fun it is.

I am in the hospital yet again with a nasty kidney infection that stated from waking up last Monday in a diaper full of loose stool. All smeared up my front side and gave me a UTI. The meds they put me on did not work. So it got into the kidney. So Here I am laying in a hospital bed yet again.

So I 100% agree f-IC is 1000x worse than just bladder. It does stop you from doing some things. Just out of fear of how would I clean up without a restroom near by. And how many people are going to notice.

Sorry to hear this. I wish you well.