Back in the Windows 3.11 days, I was in charge of the installation, configuration and maintenance of about 20 PCs that chemical process operators used to communicate with distributed process controllers (which I also designed, configured and maintained). When the hard drives of these machines became defragmented, not only did performance suffer, but they totally crapped out (the programs would no longer run). I had to use Norton Speed Disk to get them running again.
I understand what you are saying Hobbes, and today PCs crapping out due defragmentation is probably no longer possible - I just have to adjust my antique mindset.