ABDL Spouse

[abdlwife2003]

Hello,

I am a non abdl however, my spouse just came out to me. I want to be accepting and understand them. Hence why I chose to join this community. The more I am around it the more comfortable I will feel.

Any advice from Both non ABDL spouses and ABDL members would be appreciated

 

[Davvyboy]

Hello,

I am a non abdl however, my spouse just came out to me. I want to be accepting and understand them. Hence why I chose to join this community. The more I am around it the more comfortable I will feel.

Any advice from Both non ABDL spouses and ABDL members would be appreciated

It may seem strange to you but it is a harmless attribute.
It is really lovely of you to try and understand.
Please feel free to ask any questions.
Happy New Year !

 

[AVictoryPointe]

Hello,

I am a non abdl however, my spouse just came out to me. I want to be accepting and understand them. Hence why I chose to join this community. The more I am around it the more comfortable I will feel.

Any advice from Both non ABDL spouses and ABDL members would be appreciated

You did the best thing you could, which was wanting to understand and be open.

1. Take your time
2. Build trust and open communication
3. Learn to be transparent and honest; don’t punish expressing thoughts (your brain just makes thoughts, like lungs make breaths)
4. Find out what your partner gets from it
5. Explore how you might relate to it
6. Come back to yourself and your boundaries during your exploration; it’s okay to be supportive and not engaging

Your partner likely took a very big and nerve wracking step because they really like you. It’s a good sign, ultimately. This community and space is very wide. It’s not all sexual, not all roleplay, not all fetishism. You’ll have to talk with your partner to figure out their own interests and focuses.

Wishing you the best, and happy new year.

 

[Davvyboy]

You did the best thing you could, which was wanting to understand and be open.

1. Take your time
2. Build trust and open communication
3. Learn to be transparent and honest; don’t punish expressing thoughts (your brain just makes thoughts, like lungs make breaths)
4. Find out what your partner gets from it
5. Explore how you might relate to it
6. Come back to yourself and your boundaries during your exploration; it’s okay to be supportive and not engaging

Your partner likely took a very big and nerve wracking step because they really like you. It’s a good sign, ultimately. This community and space is very wide. It’s not all sexual, not all roleplay, not all fetishism. You’ll have to talk with your partner to figure out their own interests and focuses.

Wishing you the best, and happy new year.

Excellent reply

 

[MrDiaperLoverUK]

Hello,

I am a non abdl however, my spouse just came out to me. I want to be accepting and understand them. Hence why I chose to join this community. The more I am around it the more comfortable I will feel.

Any advice from Both non ABDL spouses and ABDL members would be appreciated

Firstly Hello and Welcome to this site from the United Kingdom.
Secondly the only advice I can give you is have a look at different forums on this site ask questions to anyone on this site and I hope they will point you in the right direction

 

[MrDiaperLoverUK]

You did the best thing you could, which was wanting to understand and be open.

1. Take your time
2. Build trust and open communication
3. Learn to be transparent and honest; don’t punish expressing thoughts (your brain just makes thoughts, like lungs make breaths)
4. Find out what your partner gets from it
5. Explore how you might relate to it
6. Come back to yourself and your boundaries during your exploration; it’s okay to be supportive and not engaging

Your partner likely took a very big and nerve wracking step because they really like you. It’s a good sign, ultimately. This community and space is very wide. It’s not all sexual, not all roleplay, not all fetishism. You’ll have to talk with your partner to figure out their own interests and focuses.

Wishing you the best, and happy new year.

I couldn’t put it a better way than you best advice ever

 

[abdlwife2003]

You did the best thing you could, which was wanting to understand and be open.

1. Take your time
2. Build trust and open communication
3. Learn to be transparent and honest; don’t punish expressing thoughts (your brain just makes thoughts, like lungs make breaths)
4. Find out what your partner gets from it
5. Explore how you might relate to it
6. Come back to yourself and your boundaries during your exploration; it’s okay to be supportive and not engaging

Your partner likely took a very big and nerve wracking step because they really like you. It’s a good sign, ultimately. This community and space is very wide. It’s not all sexual, not all roleplay, not all fetishism. You’ll have to talk with your partner to figure out their own interests and focuses.

Wishing you the best, and happy new year.

Thank you so much for your advice. That really helps me a lot. I am trying to be accepting.

 

[DLWee]

Welcome abdlwife2003 and thank you for doing the best thing possible. Trying to understand.
Your spouse must be a puddle of nerves from having taken the step. Whatever else, it is truly love.

I guess AVictoryPointe has scored Game, Set and Match with his comment.
What country or continent are you from? You don't have to answer (now or ever), but it might help to give better specific advice.
Browse away on these forums and ask any questions that come to mind. We are a helpful bunch, I think. If I remember rightly there are a few other non-abdl partners on here that might be able to give the most help.

 

[Forced]

Welcome and enjoy.

As someone who has a partner who understands and joins in with this interest I can tell you that it makes our relationship even closer and stronger.
Good luck on your journey

 

[Chrissie]

Talking with your spouse and not being afraid to ask questions will help you both I think. Being judgmental is usually not good in my book, however, this is about both of you and you might have to discuss and agree certain terms e.g. when and how often things take place or whether you accept but perhaps don’t want to take part etc. Boundaries sometimes have to be set otherwise, as we’ve occasionally seen here before, the ABDL partner might start to want more AB time or to go 24/7, which could become a strain on the relationship.
Your spouse has taken a huge step coming out to you but also has to accept you may not want or be able to go the whole way.
I wish you both the best for the future and hope things work out.

 

[BBBen]

Hello, welcome and happy new year to you.

You are doing good to seek advice here on adisc. The important thing is, that you both set a time to discuss this topic. Dont overdiscuss, but let your spouse know, that you accept it belongs to their life.

As ibhad the discussion with my wife she was open mimded. The problem was, that i for myself didnt have enough selfconfidence and learned much about my inner feelings the next years.

At all set boundaries and both of you look out to dont overwhelm you. Its a thing in both sides could be experienced. Perhaps your spouse didnt actual life it out fully and did not now what the whole abdl thing is for themself. Take both of you step by step, discuss from time to time and let freeroom to experience little by little.

Its a long journey so much to discover also in your living together.
And adisc is a good place to discuss with others.

Have a good start in this year

 

[warmfeeling]

Hello,

I am a non abdl however, my spouse just came out to me. I want to be accepting and understand them. Hence why I chose to join this community. The more I am around it the more comfortable I will feel.

Any advice from Both non ABDL spouses and ABDL members would be appreciated

Hi welcome here

 

[StarryNight]

Hello and welcome to the community. Thank you for taking the time and effort to understand. You have already been given a lot of good information and I don't want to overwhelm you more than your are. Just know the community is here for both of you.

 

[splootbutt]

Hello and welcome to a great community of people. Good on you for reaching out and trying to understand this unique little slice of humanity.

I second the advice above. Go slow, ask questions, give hugs.

 

[Sealander]

Hi there, welcome to ADISC! Thank you so much for trying to be understanding. Remember that being accepting doesn't mean that you cannot have your own boundaries! Communicate. Your spouse is fortunate to have you.

 

[abdlwife2003]

Hi there, welcome to ADISC! Thank you so much for trying to be understanding. Remember that being accepting doesn't mean that you cannot have your own boundaries! Communicate. Your spouse is fortunate to have you.

I almost feel it’s wrong to have boundaries. I don’t want it to seem I’m unaccepting of him.

 

[abdlwife2003]

Welcome abdlwife2003 and thank you for doing the best thing possible. Trying to understand.
Your spouse must be a puddle of nerves from having taken the step. Whatever else, it is truly love.

I guess AVictoryPointe has scored Game, Set and Match with his comment.
What country or continent are you from? You don't have to answer (now or ever), but it might help to give better specific advice.
Browse away on these forums and ask any questions that come to mind. We are a helpful bunch, I think. If I remember rightly there are a few other non-abdl partners on here that might be able to give the most help.

I am from the United States.

 

[Sealander]

I almost feel it’s wrong to have boundaries. I don’t want it to seem I’m unaccepting of him.

I understand! It is not easy. But remember it's ok to be uncomfortable and to participate just to the extent that you're comfortable.

 

[StarryNight]

I almost feel it’s wrong to have boundaries. I don’t want it to seem I’m unaccepting of him.

You can be accepting and have boundaries. This needs to work for you and him. Communication is the key. I would recommend you both check out the book your not broken by Dr. Rhoda.

 

[ianwee]

I almost feel it’s wrong to have boundaries. I don’t want it to seem I’m unaccepting of him.

Personally I would say that in all relationships there are boundaries of some kind. Setting mutually agreed boundaries with your husband would not imply that you are unaccepting of him or his behaviour, but would demonstrate that you want to continue to have an open, trusting and considerate relationship with each other. I hope that he would be willing to take into account your feelings, and not want to involve you in anything that you might find distasteful or unacceptable. Discussing boundaries together should reinforce the bonds between you , and enable you to continue to enjoy your experiences together.