Is it my Autism or because I'm an ABDL???

[caitianx]

For me, being "Little" is a normal integrated part of my life as an Autistic Senior Citizen living in the community instead of a group home here in Derry, New Hampshire.
I take care of my adult needs and responsibilities.
I also take the time to be "Little" to meet the psychological needs of my "Inner Child" which as I have said is psychologically fused on the "outside".
Anyway, it is Monday afternoon and earlier I watched the children's movie:
FERDINAND
I had my Lunch earlier.
Before that I hobbled north up the road to the convenience store for a couple necessary grocery items.
I also performed pet care on my guinea pig companions.
Soon it will be nap time and I will be "Little".

 

[sport1]

So, question. I'm 25 but I sure don't feel it I'm very immature and sensitive. I do not like horror movies as I'm too scared to watch them. Pretty much anything sexual grosses me out. I have no desire for romance and am asexual. I still watch a lot of the shows I watched from my childhood I have not outgrown them. I collect many stuffed animals and still sleep with a stuffed Pooh Bear to this day. And of course I am obsessed with Frozen.

I'd love to get the opinions of the ABDL community. I have high functioning Autism known as Aspergers, and of course am ABDL. I'm trying to figure out if these traits are common of ABDLs or if it's more because of my Autism. Basically I've never really completely grown up I still feel like a kid at times which could explain why I like to dress and act as a Baby sometimes. But does being ABDL mean that we still have kind of the mentality of children. Or do ABDLs still engage in adult activities like sex/porn, horror movies, etc.?

Because again I'm very sensitive to a lot of things and I'm wondering if that's because I'm ABDL or because I'm Autistic. Could it be that deep down I really am still just a Baby and haven't/never will mentally grow up. Or is it because of my Autism? I know ABDLs still watch and engage in children's programming and activities, but is that by choice or because they can't handle/are sensitive to adult activities? Or can they handle/engage in adult activities outside of regressing as ABDLs?

Does being ABDL actually affect your mentality and make you more sensitive and unable to handle certain things not for kids (Adult things) or is it just something we do because we like it or we choose too. I would gladly appreciate some help on this issue from the ABDL Community and those with Autism as well. Thanks and as always...stay Diapered.

Just a couple things I threw together on my phone for this post. Which do you guys like better?
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I'am also autistic with dd developmental disability and wound up back in diapers per my wife.I do not have any AB/DL and require some support which my wife gives me.

 

[longallsboy]

I highly doubt there is a connection between autism and ABDL. If you are autistic, I assume you know about the forum wrongplanet. I've seen people ask this question on there and most people affected with autism don't understand ABDL at all. One person I remember said " I personally do not want to be treated like an infant, ever. An insult to someone who proverbially went to war and back and stepped on every landmine doing it just to do the things most adults take for granted. I don't want to be completely helpless, lying around doing nothing all day but sleeping and pooping in my diaper. Ugh! I'll probably be doing plenty of that when I'm really old. ?" and I think that is a fair point. I was diagnosed by 3 different doctors when I was 4, with autism disorder (ICD-10: F84.0). I struggled in school from beginning to finish but thanks to my IEP the school helped me every step of the way. Of course they were far from perfect but they did the best they could. Now as of last month, I got an AAS degree in medical coding. (Yay, BABY PARTY!!!)

I have heard some people affected with autism can get a positive sensory experience with diapers and other childish items. I have no doubt in my mind that I'm one of them, I've wanted to be back in diapers secretly for as long as I can remember! I used to think a lot of autistic individuals might also be ABDL, but looking at autism forums like wrongplanet opened my eyes to the actual truth of the matter. A fair amount of autistic individuals don't really understand why we want to be babies, when we've worked so hard to get from there to adulthood. Just accept it, buddy. We're a bunch of weirdo diaper loving babies. I wouldn't say I'm proud to be one, but I'm fine with it, I'm fine with diapers if they make me happy. If it feels good, do it...as the old saying goes.

I'm always diapered, 24/7 besides showers and stuff of course. I retain my control and don't try to lose it, I just love diapers themselves. I find SAP to be so interesting, I can't believe just a small amount of it can absorb so much liquid. I mean...WOW! Sometimes I wonder why diapers aren't more popular because you and I both know how convenient they can be, especially during video game sessions or movies.

Another post by a WP member: " I never get infantism. I've heard that there are people who do live the life like big babies. I just don't understand how a normal, mentally stable person would want to sit around all day in diapers sucking a pacifier. Yet I feel ashamed to take my teddy bear to my boyfriend's when I stay round. And yet there are people that exist who live the life of a baby? I just don't get it."


Link to forum thread I'm referencing: https://wrongplanet.net/forums/viewtopic.php?p=3950467

I have never met so many bullying "higher functioning" Autistic people in my life as Wrongplanet. Very toxic environment. Chatroom was way worse than the bulletin board. That "support group" made me feel so ostracized that I ended up playing with preschoolers that would accept me for who I was at the end with my Autism. WP thumbs their noses at those Autistics who are not as high functioning. Totally disgusting. One of my friends from Wrongplanet who wasn't even bullied as much as me and some of my other friends said WP was more like a "shooting forum" than a support forum.

- longallsboy

 

[LittleAndAlone]

I'm in the same boat. Basically never grew up. My internal identity remains in the same state as its been since middle school. When everyone else started exploring girls, sex, alcohol, sports, cigarettes, drugs, partying, driving, etc I still secretly just wanted to continue having sleepovers with the boys and staying up all night playing Nintendo games until we passed out like the good old days. I always wondered when or if I would change and "grow up" too but it never happened. Whatever switch that flips that makes you grow up just never happened for me. Middle school still feels like yesterday and was the height of my identity and golden years, despite my continued growth, learning, and career success as an adult.

 

[BobbiSueEllen]

I have never met so many bullying "higher functioning" Autistic people in my life as Wrongplanet. Very toxic environment. Chatroom was way worse than the bulletin board. That "support group" made me feel so ostracized that I ended up playing with preschoolers that would accept me for who I was at the end with my Autism. WP thumbs their noses at those Autistics who are not as high functioning. Totally disgusting.

- longallsboy

I agree 100%. Also felt very uneasy there with one extremely sexually-expressive female member. I wasn't there long, partly for their tendencies to seize moral high grounds, lack of structure and their comparative lack of spirit of unity. I walked.

 

[longallsboy]

I'm in the same boat. Basically never grew up. My internal identity remains in the same state as its been since middle school. When everyone else started exploring girls, alcohol, sports, cigarettes, drugs, partying, etc I still secretly just wanted to continue having sleepovers with the boys and playing Nintendo games. I always wondered when or if I would change and "grow up" too but it never happened. Whatever switch that flips that makes you grow up just never happened for me. Middle school still feels like yesterday and was the height of my identity, despite my continued growth, learning, and career success as an adult.

Middle school? All hell broke loose even when I went to kindergarten. The vast majority of teachers from kindergarten to 12th grade I had complained about me endlessly to my parents, and even me, about my concentration span, my inability to follow directions, my inability to even remember to do my homework.

Based on being bullied by other kids after 4th grade, including at university, and from my problems in school, the only time I never had problems was in nursery school. The only time when teachers didn't complain about me.

I reached the apex / peak - or the best time of my life - when I was 2 to 4 1/2 years old.

- longallsboy

 

[longallsboy]

I agree 100%. Also felt very uneasy there with one extremely sexually-expressive female member. I wasn't there long, partly for their tendencies to seize moral high grounds, lack of structure and their comparative lack of spirit of unity. I walked.

Exactly. The rotten couple from Oregon who bullied me and several friends of mine (and called me a pedo because I collected vintage children's T strap shoes) certainly didn't have any problem telling other people (at least in the chatroom) all of their sexual exploits they had together. .

There was also a complete lack of unity. You'd think the group would be one happy support group, but it was divided between the higher functioning ones and the not so higher functioning ones. That is why the Autism community will never achieve any rights in the "normal world" because people like those on Wrongplanet are for division and pecking orders. Together we stand, divided we fall. ASAN is also a joke. This is why even criminals will get their rights before Autistic people do, because they are united. These people are just destroying their chances to change any discrimination in "normal society" heaped on Autistic people, because they want to have a pecking order even with their own group!!

- longallsboy

 

[LittleAndAlone]

Hehe on my morning network architecture call with a lollipop in my mouth and browsing spaceships on lego.com.

*giggles*

 

[BobbiSueEllen]

There was also a complete lack of unity. You'd think the group would be one happy support group, but it was divided between the higher functioning ones and the not so higher functioning ones...These people are just destroying their chances to change any discrimination in "normal society" heaped on Autistic people, because they want to have a pecking order even with their own group!!

- longallsboy

WrongPlanet's membership and admins can learn one helluva lot from us all here. But who needs cohesion, tempo and spirit (esprit de corps) when one has name recognition from blind referral, I guess...

And that's entirely WP's fault. Complacency kills.

 

[LittleAndAlone]

Middle school? All hell broke loose even when I went to kindergarten. The vast majority of teachers from kindergarten to 12th grade I had complained about me endlessly to my parents, and even me, about my concentration span, my inability to follow directions, my inability to even remember to do my homework.

Based on being bullied by other kids after 4th grade, including at university, and from my problems in school, the only time I never had problems was in nursery school. The only time when teachers didn't complain about me.

I reached the apex / peak - or the best time of my life - when I was 2 to 4 1/2 years old.

- longallsboy

The age of riding your bike to friend's houses, having sleepovers, playing video games, being more or less left alone. Not just playing but being proficient and completing video games. Video game magazines and console wars. Building forts, nerf and water gun and laser tag fights. Staying up all night. Camping out in the back yard in a tent messing around with electronics kits and stuff. Pretending to be spies and building spy gear. Building survival kits and fanticizing and planning for a zombie apocalypse after seeing a movie. Riding bikes to the arcade at the mall. Those are the days I yearn for. That's my forever age 4-12. Golden age little boy.

I guess I'm more middle than little but I call myself a little cause I always thought middle was teens. I'm preteen at most.

 

[longallsboy]

WrongPlanet's membership and admins can learn one helluva lot from us all here. But who needs spirit when one has name recognition from blind referral, I guess...

And that's entirely WP's fault. Complacency kills.

And a lousy admin with the last name of Plank who gave up on the site and is a sellout. And the mods on the chat punish victims but let bullies go free. I didn't say this..many other people with Autism said it, I found out through other posts (on the internet, not on ADISC). Someone even commented on Quora that all Wrongplanet taught him was that he realized he was totally alone in his Autism struggle.

- longallsboy

 

[sport1]

I have never met so many bullying "higher functioning" Autistic people in my life as Wrongplanet. Very toxic environment. Chatroom was way worse than the bulletin board. That "support group" made me feel so ostracized that I ended up playing with preschoolers that would accept me for who I was at the end with my Autism. WP thumbs their noses at those Autistics who are not as high functioning. Totally disgusting. One of my friends from Wrongplanet who wasn't even bullied as much as me and some of my other friends said WP was more like a "shooting forum" than a support forum.

- longallsboy

I agree with you.

 

[caitianx]

I have never met so many bullying "higher functioning" Autistic people in my life as Wrongplanet. Very toxic environment. Chatroom was way worse than the bulletin board. That "support group" made me feel so ostracized that I ended up playing with preschoolers that would accept me for who I was at the end with my Autism. WP thumbs their noses at those Autistics who are not as high functioning. Totally disgusting. One of my friends from Wrongplanet who wasn't even bullied as much as me and some of my other friends said WP was more like a "shooting forum" than a support forum.

- longallsboy

I have met the founder of WRONG PLANET, Alex Plank at AUTREAT years ago.
My impression was that he was an arrogant shithead.
There are plenty of shit-headed Aspies, and he is at the top of my list.
Jim Sinclair permanently kicked him out of AUTREAT.

 

[caitianx]

Pardon my blunt honesty and observations of Aspies I have gotten to know face-to-face.

 

[Chimera]

I have never met so many bullying "higher functioning" Autistic people in my life as Wrongplanet. Very toxic environment. Chatroom was way worse than the bulletin board. That "support group" made me feel so ostracized that I ended up playing with preschoolers that would accept me for who I was at the end with my Autism. WP thumbs their noses at those Autistics who are not as high functioning. Totally disgusting. One of my friends from Wrongplanet who wasn't even bullied as much as me and some of my other friends said WP was more like a "shooting forum" than a support forum.

- longallsboy

I wrote that post so long ago! But I no longer agree with it, I've been black pilled on WP ever since. I thought I found a great community of like minded aspies...NOPE best I just stick to ADISC

 

[BobbiSueEllen]

Simply put, WrongPlanet is worthless.

 

[caitianx]

Simply put, WrongPlanet is worthless.

I will agree regarding this point.

 

[Sidewinder]

The car was a vital goal for me: my parents were doubtful I could be so responsible and everyone at school thought "retards" shouldn't be on the road...I took Driver's Ed anyway on my own cash, learned what I needed to learn, went in for my test...passed well enough to get my license before my 17th birthday. After that, everything else was comparatively easy to achieve.

I wanted to learn to drive by the time I turned sixteen, but I was told by my parents that I'm not legally allowed because I'm on the spectrum.

And to make matters worse, being able to drive when I came of age was something I wanted to prove I was able to do.

Prior to that, I've spent my life proving that I was able to do all the things that my parents thought I'd be unable to do.

Because of that, I spent each passing day from that point going forward, harbouring feelings of unhappiness and jealousy towards all those who are able to drive.

I admit that I've come a long way to prove I can do anything that anyone else can do just as good, if not better.

But to be told I can't do this one thing just made me feel the most defeated I've ever felt in all my life, so much so, that it (among other things going on at the time, which I won't get into right now) nearly drove me to take my own life.

I've felt this way off and on for the past 20 years to date.

Sorry, I just had to vent.

 

[BobbiSueEllen]

I wanted to learn to drive by the time I turned sixteen, but I was told by my parents that I'm not legally allowed because I'm on the spectrum.

And to make matters worse, being able to drive when I came of age was something I wanted to prove I was able to do.

Prior to that, I've spent my life proving that I was able to do all the things that my parents thought I'd be unable to do.

Because of that, I spent each passing day from that point going forward, harbouring feelings of unhappiness and jealousy towards all those who are able to drive.

I admit that I've come a long way to prove I can do anything that anyone else can do just as good, if not better.

But to be told I can't do this one thing just made me feel the most defeated I've ever felt in all my life, so much so, that it (among other things going on at the time, which I won't get into right now) nearly drove me to take my own life.

I've felt this way off and on for the past 20 years to date.

Sorry, I just had to vent.

Nothing feels worse. All these years later, I realize how much of an enemy my own father was...keeping me in the dark. I had to find my own light, had to fight for it. No parent has any right to do that.

My parents knew there was something not quite right about me...said nothing, did nothing. I appreciate there was little-to-no help for it in the '70s, '80s...but keeping me in the dark was wrong of them.

 

[LittleAndAlone]

Nothing feels worse. All these years later, I realize how much of an enemy my own father was...keeping me in the dark. I had to find my own light, had to fight for it. No parent has any right to do that.

Most things that make kids want to grow up because they "can't" do something is because they aren't "allowed" to do something not because of individual inability. Its arbitrary lower common denominator gatekeeping by adults. Society as a whole treats kids like shit like lesser beings. Adults putting limits to work and have money, adults putting age limits on driving and other things, adults placing age limits and gatekeeping everything for themselves. All in the name of "protecting" children but it seems instead they are causing lots of trauma and resentment and lost childhoods in a mad rush to be 16, 18, 21 just to have any rights or recognition or independence or dignity.