I wear regular underwear over the top of my diapers not only to help with sagging when wet but this just about eliminates all audible noise in most every scenario. About the only time you *MIGHT* be able to hear a slight crinkle would be a quiet library or deadly silent room or hallway. Most laces, especially work places are far from quiet as everyone is focused on doing a job!
This is a non-issue for me as everyone in my family, countless medical professionals and all of my close, personal friends are well aware of my medical issues including U-IC so I don't have to do much to conceal my diapers, but out of respect towards the rest of the world, I always do my best to ensure that I am not advertising what I am wearing by inspecting myself in a large mirror before leaving to go ANYWHERE. My work is as a professional mechanic, and that is NOT a quiet endeavor. There's the ever present, very loud air compressor(s), impact wrenches, air ratchets, air hammers, ball peen hammers, grinders with ROLOC discs, engines running, and even when working outside of a shop as I have been for much of the time the past few years you still have engines running and with my building resto-mods/hot-rods for customers (and myself) you have quite substantial exhaust systems that are meant for you to "hear the power'. I also replace my air tools in these places with battery powered impact wrenches, ratchets, grinders, you name it. I work on ANYTHING that pays meaning I might have a bunch of small engine work one day and be working on a bulldozers, tractor, excavator etc. the next. IF someone who is not amongst my close friends/family can hear my diaper crinkle in these cases, they have world class ears! It's far more likely that they'll see my diaper or notice the outline under my clothes as it expands as it gets more wet throughout the day. When that happens (2x in 10 years) I simply give them the short answer which is the truth. My lower spine suffered substantial destruction and with that came nerve issues, which led to urinary incontinence. This usually is met with more questions and in most cases empathy but if someone ever wanted to make an issue out of it I'm the kind of guy who would "welcome" the confrontation. I have 20+ years of no way to release all of the pent up anger, fear, stress, frustration and some moron giving me a free pass to release all of that would be quite welcome indeed!
I know you're not wearing out of need but one thing you must realize is that NO ONE ELSE KNOWS THAT outside of your partner (if applicable) and your Dr. or Dr's. You don't have to offer any information other than to say that this is a private matter and none of your business, and do so in a calm, emphatic, reassuring voice that belies you're telling them to back off without saying so but you also must do so with confidence. HOW do you gain confidence to do this? EASILY! talk to yourself in the mirror, watching your body language as much as you listen to the tone of your voice! IF you speak with confidence, people are apt to believe you. When you tell them that this is a PRIVATE matter and one you don't want spread around to everyone else you're essentially telling that person that all arrows will point directly at them IF everyone else suddenly is aware of your secret. One thing about workplaces today, NO BOSS or OWNER wants a lawsuit for workplace harassment or worse! ODDS are you'd never bring a lawsuit if you're only wearing because you want to but even then, if you've been working with a Psychiatrist who knows you wear to allow yourself to better cope with stress, a childhood trauma or whatever reason IS a viable reason to wear so long as you're keeping yourself clean, dressed properly and not making everyone else SMELL you when you're really wet or dirty.
I can write on this for days. I'm telling you, NO ONE is looking at your crotch trying to figure out if you're wearing diapers. ALMOST every single person on the planet is so tied up with their own life, work, social issues, family issues, friends, hobbies/activities etc. and the last thing they're thinking about is WHO is wearing diapers and WHY. I was 34 when I HAD TO start wearing and trust me, I was still built far bigger than 99% of all men on Earth despite my 5'7 1/2" height as not 9 months prior I was bench pressing over 500lbs, able to do 3x that much on a leg sled (same exercise as a squat without the weight on your spine) and in my case it was driven by ego as much as desire. I grew up in a VIOLENTLY ROUGH area and became "king of the hill" (this does not mean I didn't know guys who would likely had shredded me, it simply means I was amongst the top of the food chain) and being I was BLESSED with INCREDIBLE natural strength I set all kind of goals as a 13-14 year old and had met or exceeded every single goal i had set at those ages and would them set new goals, goals that were often unrealistic or incredibly difficult to achieve. The goals I had set were NOT all about being bigger/stronger/faster...I wanted to be amongst the BEST auto mechanics on the planet and as i said, I met/exceeded every goal. I joined the ARMY to allow myself to be able to attend a demanding technical college (we began with 45 students, graduated 9 and there were only 5 of us who became incredibly good at our jobs) plus I attended a half dozen schools on the M1 Abrams main battle tank in the Army (all but the 1st couple were voluntary as they became more demanding and advanced as you went) and had I not owned a garage I might had made a career in the Army as the schools they offered were TOP NOTCH plus you obtained top tier tools/toolboxes as needed instead of putting yourself 10-50k in debt on the outside (and people wonder why the cost of auto repair is skyrocketing and there is such a MASSIVE shortage of COMPETANT, EDUCATED/TRAINED PROFESSIONAL mechanics today, not to mention the pay is nowhere near where it needs to be to not only attract new talent but to retain the talent that already exists!) and the information available to you in the military allowed you to fix ANYTHING so long as you could read and comprehend the information which was superior in quality and quantity to all aftermarket (including OEM) information available to techs/mechanics!
Back to my point though. The ONLY person focusing on a crinkle sound so slight that the ambient sound in the area you're in needs to be deadly silent for ANYONE to have ANY chance of hearing it and I highly doubt their first thought is that you're wearing a diaper!
I've written about this more than I can recall but here you go...CONFIDENCE trumps everything else in this situation! IF you're confident, speak clearly, with authority (a "Commanding" voice) that even IF someone discovers your secret, they won't do anything with that information once you tell them that you wish to keep this PRIVATE as it is YOUR "cross to bear"! Since I reached adolescence I have been a VERY confident (*cocky at times would be accurate*) man and I have a powerful voice and EXCEL at public speaking so long as I know what I am speaking about. I EXCELLED at every college level public speaking/technical writing course I have ever taken. Only 1 was mandated. I took several others as I was a business owner and being the best "speaker" I could be was an easy way to make my business ventures more profitable than they might had been otherwise, ESPECIALLY because we did NO advertising outside of sponsoring a few youth football and wrestling programs which amounted to a business card on a page amongst a dozen other business cards. I built my business and indeed my professional reputation 100% by word of mouth, and we were ALWAYS booked 3-7 days in advance even when every other chop in the area had empty bays all day, every day, for days to weeks at a time. EVEN WHEN a competitor would advertise a "special" (designed to get you in the door so they could sell you a slew of parts that many times were in perfect working condition and far from needing to be repaired/replaced) for half of what I charged for he same job yet my customers were LOYAL to the point that I had dozens of families who STILL had me service/diagnose/repair their vehicles after they moved as fr as 400 miles away! They'd bring a vehicle up one weekend and drop it off, pick it up the following weekend and leave another, so on/so forth. They did this because they couldn't find anyone who was professional and honest near them and living near a large city the costs of repair were 2-300% higher than they were here.
My point again is you being able to speak with CONFIDENCE (which includes body language, research this and you'll be surprised at some giveaways you're unaware of that are easily controlled once you learn what they are which is WHY speaking to yourself in front of a large mirror is the best way to practice short of actually speaking to someone else.
OK...I'm hurting. PLEASE don't hesitate to ask me anything! I have had countless others help guide me though life here and elsewhere and I am only paying it forward, which is what I ask of everyone I might help with what I write.
Have a great day!
CptKirk
