Incontinence and dating

[Soggy247]

Why is it so hard to find a partner who is not put off by incontinence. After 2 years of trying to find a date who is accepting, i think I'm just gonna give up. All the women i speak to are disgusted or put off by my nappies. . . . .

Sorry, just kinda wanted to vent. My friends say there is someone out there but ive all about given up hope. . . .

 

[Kbaby84]

Try eharmony. You can message people on there with same interest and beleifs and then pose the incontinence to them

 

[Soggy247]

Try eharmony. You can message people on there with same interest and beleifs and then pose the incontinence to them

Thank you. Thats a good call. I do however feel so deflated, i dont think i can take more rejections with that look of disgust. Thank you for the suggestion though.

 

[slimjiminy]

Why is it so hard to find a partner who is not put off by incontinence. After 2 years of trying to find a date who is accepting, i think I'm just gonna give up. All the women i speak to are disgusted or put off by my nappies. . . . .

Sorry, just kinda wanted to vent. My friends say there is someone out there but ive all about given up hope. . . .

I like your handle - it reminded me of that great movie "Soggy Bottom Boys" of the movie "Oh Brother, Where Art Thou".

Agreed, with the challenge of IC, there is that added stigma to overcome. Even when you get IC late in life, you still may have some push back from your spouse, which isn't easy.

When it comes to dating, I think it can be because we end up trying too hard (when I was young, I was guilty of that). It might just be that once you've relaxed, things may change. So don't write it off. Just keep your best sense of humour and appearance and out of nowhere, where you least expect it, love will find you. Love yourself and others will too. Best of luck.

 

[Soggy247]

I like your handle - it reminded me of that great movie "Soggy Bottom Boys" of the movie "Oh Brother, Where Art Thou".View attachment 79353

Agreed, with the challenge of IC, there is that added stigma to overcome. Even when you get IC late in life, you still may have some push back from your spouse, which isn't easy.

When it comes to dating, I think it can be because we end up trying too hard (when I was young, I was guilty of that). It might just be that once you've relaxed, things may change. So don't write it off. Just keep your best sense of humour and appearance and out of nowhere, where you least expect it, love will find you. Love yourself and others will too. Best of luck.

Lol. . . Never seen that film. Lol. . .

And thank you for your uplifting words. The thing is, i am successful in my career, i am the guy everyone wants to go for a beer with, i have a massive friend base, i look after myself and am always presentable, and yet, still undesirable. I try to stay positive but sometimes, it just gets the better of me. . . . Meh. . . .

 

[CheshireCat]

When it comes to love, being successful in your career, being the guy everyone wants to go for a beer with, having a massive friend base, looking after yourself, and always being presentable doesn't make you desirable. It's how you make her feel that determines your desirability.

 

[Soggy247]

When it comes to love, being successful in your career, being the guy everyone wants to go for a beer with, having a massive friend base, looking after yourself, and always being presentable doesn't make you desirable. It's how you make her feel that determines your desirability.

There has never been more a true word spoken. However, even when ive treated them like a queen and done all the right things, it just never seems to work and its always that same reason. They cant cope with the nappies. . . . Sigh. . . . .

 

[slimjiminy]

There has never been more a true word spoken. However, even when ive treated them like a queen and done all the right things, it just never seems to work and its always that same reason. They cant cope with the nappies. . . . Sigh. . . . .

On the plus side of that, be thankful you that find out now (for them). After you're fully invested and have kids, having a divorce can bring you to a whole new level of "low". Heartbreaks with kids are extreme.

 

[CheshireCat]

However, even when ive treated them like a queen and done all the right things, it just never seems to work and its always that same reason. They cant cope with the nappies.

Then they don't deserve you. Be patient... Ms. Right is out there waiting for you.

 

[Kbaby84]

Thank you. Thats a good call. I do however feel so deflated, i dont think i can take more rejections with that look of disgust. Thank you for the suggestion though.

Using eharmony it is messages and you take it instages. No need to go straight to face to face.

 

[Soggy247]

Then they don't deserve you. Be patient... Ms. Right is out there waiting for you.

Thank you for the kind words.

 

[Soggy247]

On the plus side of that, be thankful you that find out now (for them). After you're fully invested and have kids, having a divorce can bring you to a whole new level of "low". Heartbreaks with kids are extreme.

I cant have kids so i suppose i am lucky that i won't go through that.

 

[Twinmom]

I would be fine with it. Some woman are just way too judgemental. The heart is what is most important. Hang in there

 

[Soggy247]

I would be fine with it. Some woman are just way too judgemental. The heart is what is most important. Hang in there

Thank you. I would ideally live to find a female dl but I'm aware that they are a rare breed so i have been trying the vanilla world and its just not happening. I will try and stay positive though. .

 

[iampadded]

Lol. . . Never seen that film. Lol. . .

And thank you for your uplifting words. The thing is, i am successful in my career, i am the guy everyone wants to go for a beer with, i have a massive friend base, i look after myself and am always presentable, and yet, still undesirable. I try to stay positive but sometimes, it just gets the better of me. . . . Meh. . . .

I think you would be better off not mentioning your IC issues until you actually meet someone and get to know them. If you have a lot of chemistry in a new relationship, the IC issues may take a backseat to the fact that your girl really likes you.

 

[ChrisChris]

Sleep it off and try again. Nothing wrong with taking a brake but get back up and try again. Let me ask you this. When do you tell the girls your dating that your incontinent? And how do you do so? I kinda agree with the fellas up above me that you might try eharmany.

 

[Soggy247]

I think you would be better off not mentioning your IC issues until you actually meet someone and get to know them. If you have a lot of chemistry in a new relationship, the IC issues may take a backseat to the fact that your girl really likes you.

Yeah, ive read about this approach but i kinda always put it out there up front. I dont want to invest too much time in getting attached myself before she ups and leaves, if you get my meaning.

 

[Soggy247]

Sleep it off and try again. Nothing wrong with taking a brake but get back up and try again. Let me ask you this. When do you tell the girls your dating that your incontinent? And how do you do so? I kinda agree with the fellas up above me that you might try eharmany.

Yeah, i am deffo going to sleep it off and take a break. I've never tried e harmony but when i get some confidence back, i might give it a go.

 

[Forced]

I met my partner on POF dating site.
Whilst I only wear for fun I did add to my profile that I have a ABDL interest so that any potential female partner already knew before messaging me. That way they had to be okay with it or wouldn’t have bothered contacting me.
I had only positive responses, saying how brave and honest I was, and eventually ended up with a G/F who is happy to act as caretaker.

Obviously it’s easier for us here with understanding partners to say that there are people out there who will love you for who you are and not what you wear but it is true!

Good luck…..and don’t give up!

 

[Abdlchriscrinkle]

I've been let down by so many women about this exact reason. Two girls I recently dated started to become really close and got to know each other well. It hurts even more because we had so many damn things in common, got along perfectly...

But literally the minute I disclosed my need for nighttime protection, they pretty much ran for the hills.

One of these girls showed her nasty true colors by saying the way I was dealing with my nighttime issues was unacceptable and lazy as a solution, and that I ''should've exhausted every other medical approach before even considering pissing myself in bed''.
I could tell she was basically disgusted with me as soon as I mentioned wearing protection.

In the end of it, I could tell she was trying to come up with every other reason except the incontinence to get away. So I told her I could tell that my protection was the reason why it all went wrong from something that was going so well...

So with disappointment, I told her I wouldn't wish to continue on with her anyway, simply because of her judgement toward me regarding my issue. I also decided to state that she did me a very painful favor by reacting the way she did and that I had seriously dodged a bullet. At the very end of this I stated that I truly hope one day she would be on the receiving end of what she was doing to me... Her eyes were really tearing up as she walked away.

People can be so fuckin cruel. This is some of the biggest reasons why I am really starting to enjoy being single...