Hi.

[OnlyAmy]

I was talking last week to lady whose husband is totally bladder incontinent after a stroke, he already had bladder issues.
She was telling me she thought people who made a choice to wear nappies selfish, I asked her what she meant and she said it's not fair that her husband who hates having to wear them is stuck with them whereas people who choose to wear have a choice, she says she thinks people should either wear pants or nappies not mixture,
She said she doesn't have a problem with anyone wearing a nappy as long as it was on a full-time basis.

Interesting concept and I just wondered what others thought.

 

[BabyTheleste]

It’s only selfish if wearing them disadvantages someone else. And it doesn’t, so it isn’t.

 

[OnlyAmy]

It’s only selfish if wearing them disadvantages someone else. And it doesn’t, so it isn’t.

Not my opinion just the opinion of someone

 

[Wettiguy]

Some are soo judgemental even though it doesn't affect them

 

[LainIsLain]

She was telling me she thought people who made a choice to wear nappies selfish,

Selfish in what way? Does she think if someone wears a diaper that they are some how mocking or making fun of those that must wear them. Speaking from personal experience the choice to wear has everything to do with my own personal enjoyment. Many here gain a deep and lasting satisfaction and pleasure from wearing and using diapers. It's private and in no way makes me relate to anyone that must wear them in a negative way.

I understand though. I had my own judgements until my need to wear them hit at a time when I needed them the most. My opinion changed overnight.

 

[iluvdps2]

Selfish?
Sounds like she is struggling with a lot of stress from her husband's problems and is looking for other groups to be angry towards. Her reaction is understandable but irrational.

 

[littlemoosey]

I can see both sides of this, although she is entitled to her opinion... no one really has to listen to it.

 

[Furrytum]

Meh... those of us who wear medical nappies for pleasure are helping to keep the cost down for those who have to wear them, as a smaller market can lead to retailers/manufacturers raising prices in order to maintain profit levels, or even stop making them altogether.

 

[tails1234]

Am I the only one who is curious how this topic came up in the first place?

 

[whip]

Husband has had a stroke, and she is going through a lot of emotions.
Now she's caring for her ill husband. So still in shock and worry over the initial incident. These are life changing not just for her husband but herself.

Maybe she hasn't accepted the situation she is in, it takes a while to sink in. She cant change things back, so the reality is this is how things are from now on. This change in circumstances and health really hits you hard.

Looking for help and support seems to of bumped her into the "funny" part of the internet. Where we clowns seem to enjoy it. And she appears to of taken offense to that. Offense that was taken not given. She certainly doesn't understand why we like it. She doesn't need to. But she knows it's not helping her.

She can't blame anyone for her position, nature is cruel to you. You get old and your health declines. No one wants it, but it's a part of life. but the human mind is weird and I some people just need to pin things on people if they can't pin it on themselves. And that's what she's done here.

Maybe in a few months when I hope she and her husband have come to terms of the situation, her thoughts and feelings may change. I wish them well, and hope they find something that works to keep them both to be happy and still prosper.

But I suspect it's just she had a bad taste in her stomach in her time of need.

 

[OnlyAmy]

Am I the only one who is curious how this topic came up in the first place?

Discussing my partner wearing nappies.

 

[littlemoosey]

Husband has had a stroke, and she is going through a lot of emotions.
Now she's caring for her ill husband. So still in shock and worry over the initial incident. These are life changing not just for her husband but herself.

Maybe she hasn't accepted the situation she is in, it takes a while to sink in. She cant change things back, so the reality is this is how things are from now on. This change in circumstances and health really hits you hard.

Looking for help and support seems to of bumped her into the "funny" part of the internet. Where we clowns seem to enjoy it. And she appears to of taken offense to that. Offense that was taken not given. She certainly doesn't understand why we like it. She doesn't need to. But she knows it's not helping her.

She can't blame anyone for her position, nature is cruel to you. You get old and your health declines. No one wants it, but it's a part of life. but the human mind is weird and I some people just need to pin things on people if they can't pin it on themselves. And that's what she's done here.

Maybe in a few months when I hope she and her husband have come to terms of the situation, her thoughts and feelings may change. I wish them well, and hope they find something that works to keep them both to be happy and still prosper.

But I suspect it's just she had a bad taste in her stomach in her time of need.

Very well thought out and stated.

I hope she can come to terms as well.

It is not important that she approves or disapproves of AB/DL. She and her husband are struggling, the fact that he is having trouble accepting his new reality has to be concerning for her... which probably colors her opinion of this community. I hope they can find some peace.

 

[Wettiguy]

Get the same with wetting and water sports. People get angry and outraged that somone does on purpose that they can't help .

 

[blaincorrous]

Opinions are like assholes. But a diaper can’t cover an opinion.

 

[LainIsLain]

Or maybe you could allow your spouses some dignity? Just holding up the mirror - if you don't like what you see that's your problem, not mine.

You have no idea of in what context so maybe don't make stupid statements without knowing facts

That is a bit harsh and we don't know the context. Maybe she already knew and was voicing an opinion that's just a bit naive. That being said being ABDL is a very private matter for most and I'd be hurt if someone "carelessly" gossiped about my diaper wearing. Not that I could stop it but I'd be hurt regardless. I hope both partners are aware of the discussion.

 

[LainIsLain]

I ment it's harsh to call someone stupid because we don't know the context. Some people get defensive so fast!

 

[Peesalot]

If she thought about the economics of it, she might realize those of us who wear for fun might be helping to keep the cost of diapers down for those who must wear them. Consider if 50% (wild guess for illustrative purposes only) of diapers are sold to those of us who are fully continent. Without sales to us, the diaper companies might well be fewer due to a smaller market. Also, with less competition it's quite possible the prices may be higher. Who knows? Only The Shadow knows.

I suspect she is feeling badly for her husband and his situation which is most understandable; but, the DL/ABDL community has no reason to feel badly about its love of diapers.

 

[DwarvenDL]

I was talking last week to lady whose husband is totally bladder incontinent after a stroke, he already had bladder issues.
She was telling me she thought people who made a choice to wear nappies selfish, I asked her what she meant and she said it's not fair that her husband who hates having to wear them is stuck with them whereas people who choose to wear have a choice, she says she thinks people should either wear pants or nappies not mixture,
She said she doesn't have a problem with anyone wearing a nappy as long as it was on a full-time basis.

Interesting concept and I just wondered what others thought.

My take has been repeated by other I believe. I think her true frustration/concern is for her husband and his loathe for the necessity. I doubt she truly thought out her sentiment and simply came out at a convenient target. I would be interested in how the conversation turned to her condemnation of abdls...was it something she had seen/read previously, was it a question posed as in "what do you think about this...", or could have been something she had been exposed to at some point in some manner in a more visceral sense?

 

[Lewis Badger]

It seems attaching too much sentiment to diapers is the weird thing here. It's nothing to be embarrassed about and just let people do what they want.