Did you ever use a toilet before? (from long time IC people)

[greatlake5]

I've been IC since the beginning. Aside from my mom trying "potty training" on me, I've only used the toilet a few times. As a kid it was frustrating and at times, it got me angry. Jesus I tried. It just never worked. It was frustrating for both of us. We tried everything. When I was a bit older I would try myself sitting on the toilet in my personal bathroom. For hours. Sometimes I would actually pee for a bit but I just didn't feel the urge. Hours latter I just couldn't hold it and the urgency was so strong. The same thing when I had a BM. I tried so many times but hours latter...pooped right into my diaper because I had such a strong urgency. It was crazy. Doctors diagnosed me (I'd prefer not to discus the actual diagnose...it's irrelevant), and I do see them regularly and my condition is "steady." But I will say that I'm profoundly IC.

So yeah, I'm diaper dependent. Have you ever felt what it might feel like using a toilet like normal people? It's been a couple of decades not using a toilet. I guess I've has a fantasy about using a toilet instead of wearing a diaper. Life would be so much easier. No complications (at least about wearing diapers). Of course I've accepted being IC and I think I've got used to it. But I still think about it. Is it just me? Or do you think about it like I do?

 

[rennecfox]

Yeah you shouldn’t beat yourself up but I understand why you’d feel that way, sometimes cards we need just don’t come up in the deck.

 

[NappiedTruckDriver]

I’ve only been FT diaper wearing for just under a year , so have had 43 years of toilet using
Apart from a home or work toilet , any where else like school , public toilets etc were hell as I have a shy bladder and all the noise even in a stall I couldn’t pee even if busting and would have to force it out causing issues there
@greatlake5 Don’t beat your self up about never using a toilet I know by what you post you’re tired and disheartened wearing diaper all the time so keep up with the posts as you give a good perspective on why healthy people shouldn’t try lose control
PS , some of the easiest best pees I’ve had are in the middle of nowhere at the side of the road in the dark on my own , but the same could be said about being in a busy rest room

 

[CheshireCat]

I used the toilet until my neuromuscular genetic disorder fully revealed itself at the age of 39.

I have a neurogenic bladder that tracks with my neuromuscular disorder.

When my neuromuscular disorder is doing well, my bladder holds and I start getting subtle cues from my abdomen when the bladder is filled to 1000-1200mL. If I ignore the cues, I go into full retention near the 2000mL mark, and will no longer be able to pee; I need to be catheterized. To prevent this situation, I'm on a voiding schedule to prevent the bladder from being filled over 600mL. I'll use the toilet during this time, but still wear a diaper in case my neuromuscular disorder gets triggered, which will cause me to lose bladder control.

When my neuromuscular disorder is doing poorly, I require a diaper at all times because of continuous leaking. So, no need for a toilet.

Now my radiation induced chronic colitis has morphed into IBS. I do everything possible to use a toilet for that, because the times I accidentally messed my diaper were freakin' disasters. People may call it a "messy" diaper, but it's the mess and stench that's left behind after removing the diaper that matters. I literally stay home until at least noon everyday, to make sure I'm past any severe bowel issue.

So, yes, I use a toilet like normal people whenever possible, but my toilet experience is far from normal.

 

[DiaperDiva]

A toilet is always preferred if I feel the need for a BM in the daytime, but that’s rare.

 

[greatlake5]

I require a diaper at all times

I'm profoundly IC. Using a toilet just doesn't work for me. Unless I'm sleeping I experience strong urgency. For wetting and sometimes BM accidents. When I'm sleeping I don't feel anything. I sleep like I'm in a coma. When I'm awake, I just don't feel any urge until it's too late. Thus using a toilet simply doesn't help. I've been like this since the beginning.

A toilet is always preferred if I feel the need for a BM in the daytime, but that’s rare.

I wish. Like I said using a toilet with be a fantasy. Preferred? I wonder what that would feel like?

 

[Finny]

I've been IC since the beginning. Aside from my mom trying "potty training" on me, I've only used the toilet a few times. As a kid it was frustrating and at times, it got me angry. Jesus I tried. It just never worked. It was frustrating for both of us. We tried everything. When I was a bit older I would try myself sitting on the toilet in my personal bathroom. For hours. Sometimes I would actually pee for a bit but I just didn't feel the urge. Hours latter I just couldn't hold it and the urgency was so strong. The same thing when I had a BM. I tried so many times but hours latter...pooped right into my diaper because I had such a strong urgency. It was crazy. Doctors diagnosed me (I'd prefer not to discus the actual diagnose...it's irrelevant), and I do see them regularly and my condition is "steady." But I will say that I'm profoundly IC.

So yeah, I'm diaper dependent. Have you ever felt what it might feel like using a toilet like normal people? It's been a couple of decades not using a toilet. I guess I've has a fantasy about using a toilet instead of wearing a diaper. Life would be so much easier. No complications (at least about wearing diapers). Of course I've accepted being IC and I think I've got used to it. But I still think about it. Is it just me? Or do you think about it like I do?

I try to go to the toilet each time I have feelings to urinate at all

 

[CrossfireHurricane]

I think the only time I sat at a toilet was when I was being potty trained. Obviously it didn't work. I did try when I was older but again, a no go. I have 3 bathrooms in my house. One next to my bedroom, one for the guest room and one near the family room. The only time I use them if I'm dropping the stool when I'm getting ready to put my diaper in the diaper pail. To be honest I can't even remember when I used one.

 

[Edgewater]

I lived a normal life up until I was 30. Then a car crash and my use of the toilet was vasty reduced.

Now-a-days, I use it for my normal Morning BM and from time to time during a dry-out I successful urinating.

 

[slimjiminy]

I lived a normal life up until I was 30. Then a car crash and my use of the toilet was vasty reduced.

I live a normal life until 64 and then U-IC set in. Later in that year, some F-IC was making itself known. Diabetes robbed me of my normalness.

 

[CrossfireHurricane]

I lived a normal life up until I was 30. Then a car crash and my use of the toilet was vasty reduced.

Now-a-days, I use it for my normal Morning BM and from time to time during a dry-out I successful urinating.

Sometimes I wonder what that must feel like - "normal morning BM". I've excepted my reality but still, knowing that using a toilet I only use it to put a load of stool. Almost every morning. Wetting my diaper is pretty simple. I can't remember even using a toilet. I think most F-IC members haven't used one. Ever. To be honest, I'm fine with that. I know others have way more difficulties then what I deal with. Be thankful. I'm not quadriplegic.