sinceiwassmall said:
I have many memories of being wet as a kid. A few times it was a full-on puddle-under-my-chair or down-to-my-shoes accident, but mostly I would just lose one little spurt. I would be excited or distracted or just wait too long and pee a little.
it happened more days than not until I was 6 or 7, at home, school and out playing. Somehow my little leaks took me by surprise every time. I’d be startled back into control by the first warmth and release in my undies and be checking my pants to see if it showed. So many times it did. Gym class, recess, hide and seek, not wanting to leave a board game, watching TV, wiggling at the dinner table too shy to ask. I was the kid with a little boy wet spot between my legs, trying to hide it until my pants dried.
And then there were all the times I wet my bed.
I was sooo shy and embarrassed when I’d had an accident. I couldn’t have made any sense of the question of whether I enjoyed it.
Until... all those feelings and memories got turned in the most unexpected direction at puberty. And suddenly being a little boy wetting my pants was very exciting to me. And I started acting out all of those little scenes for pleasure.
My accidents (mostly) stopped by the time I was eight and I only sometimes enjoyed them.
I just remembered one from when I was four. One day, I was in my sister’s room and looking at her doll house and the things that were inside it.
For some reason, I was interested in doll houses and dolls back then (even though I am male). But then again, I watch My Little Pony off and on even today and so I guess that part of me is still there to some degree.
In any case, after I was finished looking at the doll house for that day the sun came in through the window and the wind started blowing and I couldn’t stop watching the shadows move on the wood floor even as my bladder filled up. Eventually, I couldn’t hold it any more and I wet my pants.
My sister came in, saw what I did, told me I would be “in so much trouble“ and told my mother about it.
My mother came in, told me I was too old to be doing this and took me to the bathroom one room over to be cleaned up in the tub and then diapered. When my pants were wet, it didn’t feel bad, just warm.
I was somewhat trained at that point, and on good days was even able to pee in the big toilet standing up like my father showed me. But most of the time I just went where I was with or without a diaper on and didn’t especially mind. I didn’t really try to have accidents, but when they did happen both the release and the warmth felt good (at least sometimes). The occasional rashes were less fun (which is probably why I trained at all).
None of my accidents were small ones because I couldn’t cut the flow after starting until I was nine years old (if not ten). Although by that age accidents were rare.
My first “intentional accident” was when I was about five or so and I was playing in the back yard in just my underwear. I was experimenting with moving my stomach in and out and I noticed that when I tightened my stomach I could make it feel like I had to go, and when it wasn’t tightened I didn’t need to. Eventually, when I tightened my stomach enough it felt like I was about to have an accident and then I stopped tightening. I experimented like this some more (maybe three or four times). On the last one I decided to tighten my stomach as much as possible to see if I could make myself have an accident. I didn’t know if that would work because I never tried it before, but it did. I did other experiments like this off and on for a long time.
It was only after these experiments in the back yard that I figured out how to “go before leaving the house“ like my parents told me to. Therefore, looking back I see it more as part of the training experience than deliberate misbehavior (even though I sometimes enjoyed it) and I can only guess how much extra laundry my mother had to do because of these experiments (during which I would learn how to speed up and slow down the flow (mostly using abdominal muscles)). Learning to stop the flow would come much later.
