Courage to use my nappy for No.2 whilst shoulder recovers

[Link66]

I have my left shoulder immobilised due to recent bursitis diagnosis. My left arm/ hand is dominant for everything I do. My wife has always fits/ changes my nappies as required prior to getting this condition.

I need advice here please!
I can't remove my nappy all that easily to take a No.2 in the toilet at present and wiping sufficient using my non dominant hand is like near on impossible.
My wife probably hasn't considered this could be an issue for me, nor would she think I would use my nappy instead of the toilet. I have always used the toilet for No.2.

How do I bring this subject up with her and convince her it's easier for me to use my nappy at this time?
I know she will baulk at the thought of changing a dirty nappy.

Any ideas would be helpful.

Thanks.

 

[BigAl2]

Be straight forward about it. Don't beat around the bush.

 

[sbmccue]

BigAl doesn't overstate the imprudence of 'hinting around' and hoping she'll suddenly by dying to change your dirty nappy. Explain your problem in straightforward style and ask her to suggest a solution.

 

[Zeke]

Be cautious using logic to convince her, this often got me in trouble when trying to “mansplain” to my ex wife why we should do something. I was going to try her method of communicating prickly subjects, she would write her thoughts down and refine them before sharing them with me, but I never got around to it (or a round tuit). She eventually gave up on her letter writing as she became more proficient at arguing for her position. Maybe you could write her a letter after you’ve researched all the positive reasons for using your butt wrapper for the deuce!

 

[Link66]

Ok I will consider doing that.

I think she will suggest I use the toilet and then clean up the shower; which will be problematic with using my right arm only.

Thanks for your advice!

 

[Link66]

Be cautious using logic to convince her, this often got me in trouble when trying to “mansplain” to my ex wife why we should do something. I was going to try her method of communicating prickly subjects, she would write her thoughts down and refine them before sharing them with me, but I never got around to it (or a round tuit). She eventually gave up on her letter writing as she became more proficient at arguing for her position. Maybe you could write her a letter after you’ve researched all the positive reasons for using your butt wrapper for the deuce!

Yes I could try that. Even suggest she wears a covid mask and gloves perhaps.

Thanks for your advice.

 

[BigAl2]

When i had my carpal tunnel done on my right. I had no problems using my left to do things.

 

[Zeke]

Be straight forward about it. Don't beat around the bush.

Telling me to not beat around the bush would be like tying one of my arms behind my back…..which would leave me looking for help changing my diaper kind of like you’re doing, definitely not very helpful!

 

[BigAl2]

Im a very straight forward person. So that is how i also ask if i need a hand too.

 

[Zeke]

I’m right hand dominant, but I have a congenital defect in my right eye leaving me with around 20/600 vision in that eye although I have 20/15 in my left eye. This meant anything that requires me to use my eye to site, like shooting a rifle or pool, I had to do left handed. Fortunately I was provided with 2 lefties for parents, one of which was a Marine sergeant in the Korean Conflict who bought me a .22 single shot Ithaca model 49 at age 7 and taught me shooting and firearm safety straight out of the Marine Corps manual. This all helped prepare me for my tumor surgery in the mid ‘90s. It was a 3-1/2 pound sarcoma, or liposarcoma, they weren’t sure until they did a frozen biopsy on the removed tumor, on my right scapula and upper right arm with the deltoid transecting it like a tarp strap over a water balloon. They had to detach the deltoid, remove the tumor, and scrape the bone before stitching it all back together. The orthopedic surgeon/oncologist that did the surgery came into my room the next day and rather enthusiastically asked if I wanted to see the tumor and that it was the biggest he had ever removed. I said no, but I would like to know if it was malignant or not. He said that he would never have come into a cancer patient’s room with the jovial attitude that he had if it had been. This led to several months where there was NO USING my right arm so all those things that I had to do left handed prior to this were good training to prepare me for not being able to use my dominant hand for a while. I’m still not sure if the large bottle of Dilaudid they sent me home with helped or hurt. This was a few years after our divorce, but I’m pretty sure that I can tell you what my ex would’ve said if I had asked for her help changing my diaper! By the way for all you lefties out there a good friend used to tell me that he was born right handed, but he managed to overcome it. He was the same guy that used to tell me that God only made a few perfect heads, the others He put hair on.

 

[Link66]

Lol. Great story.

Thanks

 

[Dinotopian2002]

If your wife has helped you change before at times, then she’s at least used to changing you. And I’m guessing she knows about your shoulder difficulties.

If your bowel control is decent, it may be possible to ask her to help undo your top tapes, which would allow you or her to pull the back of your nappy down and use the toilet regularly. This way, she can help you but she won’t have to do full on messy changes.

Depending on what kind of nappies you wear, you may need to get some which have Velcro or hook & loop tapes which allow you to reattach them much easier. Tena do some good ones like that.

Hope this helps!

Breathe Deep, Seek Peace
Dinotopian2002

 

[Link66]

If your wife has helped you change before at times, then she’s at least used to changing you. And I’m guessing she knows about your shoulder difficulties.

If your bowel control is decent, it may be possible to ask her to help undo your top tapes, which would allow you or her to pull the back of your nappy down and use the toilet regularly. This way, she can help you but she won’t have to do full on messy changes.

Depending on what kind of nappies you wear, you may need to get some which have Velcro or hook & loop tapes which allow you to reattach them much easier. Tena do some good ones like that.

Hope this helps!

Breathe Deep, Seek Peace
Dinotopian2002

That's a good idea. I do wear cloth mostly. But do have some disposables you describe.

Thanks.

 

[BigAl2]

I’m right hand dominant, but I have a congenital defect in my right eye leaving me with around 20/600 vision in that eye although I have 20/15 in my left eye. This meant anything that requires me to use my eye to site, like shooting a rifle or pool, I had to do left handed. Fortunately I was provided with 2 lefties for parents, one of which was a Marine sergeant in the Korean Conflict who bought me a .22 single shot Ithaca model 49 at age 7 and taught me shooting and firearm safety straight out of the Marine Corps manual. This all helped prepare me for my tumor surgery in the mid ‘90s. It was a 3-1/2 pound sarcoma, or liposarcoma, they weren’t sure until they did a frozen biopsy on the removed tumor, on my right scapula and upper right arm with the deltoid transecting it like a tarp strap over a water balloon. They had to detach the deltoid, remove the tumor, and scrape the bone before stitching it all back together. The orthopedic surgeon/oncologist that did the surgery came into my room the next day and rather enthusiastically asked if I wanted to see the tumor and that it was the biggest he had ever removed. I said no, but I would like to know if it was malignant or not. He said that he would never have come into a cancer patient’s room with the jovial attitude that he had if it had been. This led to several months where there was NO USING my right arm so all those things that I had to do left handed prior to this were good training to prepare me for not being able to use my dominant hand for a while. I’m still not sure if the large bottle of Dilaudid they sent me home with helped or hurt. This was a few years after our divorce, but I’m pretty sure that I can tell you what my ex would’ve said if I had asked for her help changing my diaper! By the way for all you lefties out there a good friend used to tell me that he was born right handed, but he managed to overcome it. He was the same guy that used to tell me that God only made a few perfect heads, the others He put hair on.

Zeke i practice ambi shooting. Just in-case if i get injured in my dominate areas. I loved how you overcame. Well done.

 

[Zeke]

That's a good idea. I do wear cloth mostly. But do have some disposables you describe.

Thanks.

You sent me running to Duck Duck Go to learn what ambi shooting is. Come to find out I’ve been doing it for many years. When I was doing my workouts for rehab and I was in excellent shape I used to shoot my Ruger Super Redhawk .44 mag one handed, right or left, and was quite accurate at 25 and 50 yards. There’s no way that I’d try that today in the shape that I’m in now. I sold that wheel gun and I’ve been looking at a Sig P365XL 9mm for concealed carry. As far as overcoming, like I said I was raised by a Marine so it wasn’t optional around our house.

 

[BigAl2]

I reload. So i can load soft to wild. My Ruger SBH was the 1st pistol i bought. I can't shoot a lot of magnum loads at a time these days. So I'll run 12 rounds of hot loads an outing. Then back off with mild loads. I carry a Taurus PT111 9mm and a spectrum .380 for daily carry.

 

[Zeke]

I reload. So i can load soft to wild. My Ruger SBH was the 1st pistol i bought. I can't shoot a lot of magnum loads at a time these days. So I'll run 12 rounds of hot loads an outing. Then back off with mild loads. I carry a Taurus PT111 9mm and a spectrum .380 for daily carry.

A little over 8 years ago I had a pacemaker installed and that tumor removal surgery that I had on my upper right arm and shoulder came back to bite me. Like I’ve said before I learned to shoot left handed from my lefty Marine father and that’s his hand dominance not his political leanings (I would have my ears boxed, even though he’s passed, if I didn’t include that disclaimer). Anyway, when the cardiac surgeon, that did the pacemaker surgery, said he couldn’t put it on my right side, where I wanted it to avoid the recoil from shooting left handed, because of a hollow on the inside my shoulder area in front where the pacemaker would be. I think that sunken area comes from when the deltoid muscles were reattached and they were bunched up leaving that hollow. He was concerned that there wouldn’t be any cushioning for the device in that depression. I’m due for a new battery in a couple of years and I’m going to ask if they can relocate it to that right side hollow otherwise I’m afraid that someday I might drop at the same time as the deer in my scope does when I send him one down range.

 

[NannaAnnabelle]

That's a good idea. I do wear cloth mostly. But do have some disposables you describe.

Thanks.

The times I've tried cloth have left me feeling like I need at least one extra hand. The thought of using 1 is unfathomable.

Besides switching to a refastenable disposal I'd just recommend practicing using the non-dominant arm but explain to your wife things could get a bit messy in the process of learning.

 

[newt]

Why don't you just ask if she could help you wipe after you've used the toilet? Why mess in the diaper and create a lot of extra work?

 

[AttilaThePun]

I have my left shoulder immobilised due to recent bursitis diagnosis. My left arm/ hand is dominant for everything I do. My wife has always fits/ changes my nappies as required prior to getting this condition.

I need advice here please!
I can't remove my nappy all that easily to take a No.2 in the toilet at present and wiping sufficient using my non dominant hand is like near on impossible.
My wife probably hasn't considered this could be an issue for me, nor would she think I would use my nappy instead of the toilet. I have always used the toilet for No.2.

How do I bring this subject up with her and convince her it's easier for me to use my nappy at this time?
I know she will baulk at the thought of changing a dirty nappy.

Any ideas would be helpful.

Thanks.

If you can manage to undo your top tapes and "drop trou" so to speak, you might still be able to take a #2 in the toilet. Consider getting a wiping tool so you can wipe your own butt - I use the one made by Juvo, because my lumbar spine has been surgically fused and I can't twist to wipe - and perhaps your wife can pull up and retape your diaper for you.