Benzie
Est. Contributor
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- Incontinent
So, I thought maybe it would be a bit therapeutic to get my thoughts out here, in full.
I'm 20 years old. 5'11" and around 240, so not in the best of shape, but that tends to be the body style of everyone in my family. Even when I was in the Navy, my lowest was around 208 and I was in great shape.
I've always drank a large volume of fluids, I was the kid that would finish his glass of whatever I was drinking before I got halfway through my meal, so I was used to going to the bathroom a lot. My family has a history of Type II Diabetes, but I've never tested positive for anything that would show that.
And then, around eight months ago, I started to notice that I'd dribble slightly if I got up to go to the bathroom. Within a month and a half, I had issues being able to hold urine at all, as well as control the flow once it started. It continued to progress, and now, I'm at the point where I sometimes don't even notice if I void, at least not until I'm almost done.
I changed my diet, I went to see the doctor (who basically chalked it up to OBS, refused to look at my prostate, and gave me some Oxybutynin), I made myself do kegals hourly and take mandatory trips. I've noticed I can't hold any amount close to what I used to, and my problems extend overnight.
Thankfully, I have a supportive and understanding family. My mother has even gone so far as to help me pick out the right diapers to use, and paid for them, seeing as I had to quit my job recently and move home to take care of other family members. This does create a dilemma, however, seeing as she prefers I use something discreet, and the things that are more discreet don't work quite as well as I'd like them to.
I haven't had any insurance, so when I have some again I'll be able to see a doctor. The only possible explanation I can find, even if it is far fetched, is that the Navy had me go through a Cystoscopy near the end of boot camp, about a year before the more severe symptoms started to show up. I was used to going often already, so frequency probably wouldn't have been an obvious sign to me.
I'm honestly just scared by this, and while I've come to terms with the position I'm currently in, I struggle with it constantly. My depression (which was diagnosed for the first time when I was in advanced training, leading to my discharge) makes things difficult already, but to cope with everything I've reached out to groups who might understand. As a result, I've started to enjoy things like diapers and take comfort in the atmosphere that these communities have, but it brings about a lot of guilt as well.
Well, I just wanted to get that all out there. If you guys have any advice or words to share, I'd really appreciate it.
Thanks.
I'm 20 years old. 5'11" and around 240, so not in the best of shape, but that tends to be the body style of everyone in my family. Even when I was in the Navy, my lowest was around 208 and I was in great shape.
I've always drank a large volume of fluids, I was the kid that would finish his glass of whatever I was drinking before I got halfway through my meal, so I was used to going to the bathroom a lot. My family has a history of Type II Diabetes, but I've never tested positive for anything that would show that.
And then, around eight months ago, I started to notice that I'd dribble slightly if I got up to go to the bathroom. Within a month and a half, I had issues being able to hold urine at all, as well as control the flow once it started. It continued to progress, and now, I'm at the point where I sometimes don't even notice if I void, at least not until I'm almost done.
I changed my diet, I went to see the doctor (who basically chalked it up to OBS, refused to look at my prostate, and gave me some Oxybutynin), I made myself do kegals hourly and take mandatory trips. I've noticed I can't hold any amount close to what I used to, and my problems extend overnight.
Thankfully, I have a supportive and understanding family. My mother has even gone so far as to help me pick out the right diapers to use, and paid for them, seeing as I had to quit my job recently and move home to take care of other family members. This does create a dilemma, however, seeing as she prefers I use something discreet, and the things that are more discreet don't work quite as well as I'd like them to.
I haven't had any insurance, so when I have some again I'll be able to see a doctor. The only possible explanation I can find, even if it is far fetched, is that the Navy had me go through a Cystoscopy near the end of boot camp, about a year before the more severe symptoms started to show up. I was used to going often already, so frequency probably wouldn't have been an obvious sign to me.
I'm honestly just scared by this, and while I've come to terms with the position I'm currently in, I struggle with it constantly. My depression (which was diagnosed for the first time when I was in advanced training, leading to my discharge) makes things difficult already, but to cope with everything I've reached out to groups who might understand. As a result, I've started to enjoy things like diapers and take comfort in the atmosphere that these communities have, but it brings about a lot of guilt as well.
Well, I just wanted to get that all out there. If you guys have any advice or words to share, I'd really appreciate it.
Thanks.