Strange first diaper experience

So, I have basically been an abdl all my life (and I've accepted this for at least a few years), yet I was heasitant to actually try diapers for such a long time. Now, I'm only 19, but considering that I've had these desires which were so strong at times, I'm surprised I did not try it sooner.
Anyways, I must say that my first experience with diapers was actually sort of underwhelming. I felt like, the whole experience was sort of single faceted, and there wasn't that much variation. I tried wearing for the first time like a week ago, and I wet my diaper, and waddled around in it sort of, but as I was doing it I never really was thrilled by it. I tried diapers again last night, to see if maybe it would be better the second time, but it wasn't any better. It once again seemed monolithic. While I was doing it, I thought to myself *ok this is sort of fun but I felt like the thrill died rather quickly. I suspect that my years of abstaining from diaper use has allowed myself to "hype up"my first time in my mind. All in all, it was a good experience and I definitely learned some things about myself. But I don't see myself trying them too much in the future. By the way, I really support this site, it it very helpful, especially to people who are conflicted by their diaper habits.

I'm sorry it wasn't that "wow" experience for you, because it probably was for most of us, including myself. You may experience regressing differently. Maybe you should try something else like plushies or baby bottles, etc. Some people prefer pants wetting or underwear wetting. It's a broad spectrum and we tend to fall broadly across that spectrum. It's possible you may need to try a different kind of diaper. I wear cloth, but that's what I would have worn when I was little. Generally, we tend to enjoy that which reminds us of our childhood.

Maybe it's like you said you suppressed your feelings so long actually acting on them feels like meh. Of course this is something you'd have to want to try and if you want to explore jut try wearing whenever you get the urge again. Maybe you'll get that relief that I get every single day (24/7 wearer with awful anxiety).

I'm confused here. You say you've been abdl your whole life, but only a week ago tried your first diaper. How do you know you've been an abdl the whole time then?

This might just be a slight fascination with diapers for you, but not actual abdl desires. Either way, if it's still a little fun for you then what's that matter. You're still young and figuring things out, so embrace diapers however much you want as long as it makes you happy.

I have been a little for about 2 years now. I JUST tried diapers a few weeks ago as well. I too was bashing diapers because I thought they weren't that big of a deal. But as soon as I put one on, I had an amazing feeling of safeness and comfort that I can't even begin to describe.
Your "little" mind might think you're too "grown up" for diapers?
My "little" age is 3-5 but she refuses to be potty trained lol

Idk. This sounds like it might not be 'actual' ABDL then.

I can remember distinctly liking diapers from around age 5 and up. Any chance that popped up where I was able to wear a diaper was-- to put it simply-- borderline magical (because of how rare it was back then). In fact, my first time wearing a 'real' diaper (one of the old blue tape Attends) is one of my most treasured memories.

Maybe this is less of you being ABDL, and more just a mild curiosity as to what a diaper feels like?

I'm glad you finally got a chance to try diaper and it is it sounds like you over thought what your experience might be. If you try them out again don't over think it, just enjoy the moment. There is no specific way you are suppose to feel. If you like the feeling great if not that fine too. Don't worry about if you feel abdl enough, everyone is different. Just do what makes you happy. I hope this doesn't come off as too preachy.

Give it time. Do it when the need arises, if it does. If it doesn't, so be it. You can still like the idea of diapers, as a sort of fantasy, without indulging.

I had also hyped up my first diaper experience for several years. I was 19 when i put on my first diaper, and i had been wanting to try it for 3-4 years. Trying it for the first time was a HUGE deal to me, and i was incredibly excited. When i had it on, i was actually a little disappointed. It was still a great experience, but my expectations were just so incredibly high. I know now that if i had tried a thicker and better diaper at a better time, it would have been a better experience. Remember that there is more to the whole diaper-thing than to just wear and wet at home. You can try different diapers, wearing and wetting in different places, wearing during activities (jogging, shopping, dentist/hairdresser etc.). My first couple times were definately not my best ones, so don't give up just yet

...and I honestly cannot remember my first wearing of a diaper, BUT, I do actually remember VIVIDLY when I first pulled on a pair of (red-plaid) plastic pants (of my 2 yr old brother's), at age 5. Priceless! Always thought that feeling of shame/secrecy would get old, but it hasn't, after 58+ years...

dogboy said:

I'm sorry it wasn't that "wow" experience for you, because it probably was for most of us, including myself.

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I only ever was able to try a real one at 4, did not have siblings. Recall enjoying it but only had maybe a minute to try it.

For the next 12 years it was always makeshift designs, and I had some fun with those.

The first "real" diaper I tried was unfortunately a Depend, and I also felt like the parent poster. Stiff as cardboard padding, as thin as two pairs of underwear would be, lots of hot, sweaty, empty plastic, louder than my makeshift designs, **six** tapes, entirely medical and not cute at all, and the first one leaked IIRC. It was nothing like I imagined, because it was nothing like any diapers I had remembered. This was something else entirely.

Fast forward to trying a Pampers size 6 as an adult, as they didn't have 7 yet I don't think, and even though that just barely fit like a speedo, it was obvious there was a whole world of difference. I found increasingly enjoyable medical brands, culminating with the Secure Plus which way back then was fantastic. It took another five years or so from then before I could finally try a real bonafide AB diaper. And that was every bit as magical as I'd imagined.

I really wish my first real adult sized experience was with a LittlePawz, Fabine Teddy, or 2015-era Bellissimo. But the first Depend experience didn't really dampen my spirits on diapers for more than a few days. I just knew what I wanted either didn't exist or wasn't sold in stores yet. But I knew it was possible, and somehow I'd get it one day

Yeah, thank goodness for the internet. Years ago I used to buy toddler sized cloth diapers and Gerber toddler plastic pants. Once the internet was common, AB diaper sites began to come onto the scene and that's changed everything.

My first diaper (as an adult) was sort of "meh" too. But after a while, getting used to using them, and trying out AB brands, there's truly nothing that compares to the feel of a thick, soft, crinkly piece of padding in between my legs. ^^

talking of my first diaper purchases... I ran across something diaper related on the internet around 2008, I don't remember what it was. But it reminded me that "hey you live on your own, it's okay to get some diapers now!" So I got up the courage to buy a bag of depends at the local walgreens. I was very disappointed to find out I'd bought clothlike. (I had no idea that was even an option!) So I did a bit of research online and figured out what to look for to make sure I didn't repeat that mistake, and went back out for another bag. Success. But, depends. Wasn't too impressed. There has to be something more like what I remember of diapers?

So I got to looking more online, and the first thing I ran into was a pic of some gal wearing a bambino classico. "Is that a real product? Is it for sale? What's it called? Where do you find that?" I finally tracked it down to bambino.com and bought a sample of two medium. I was so nervous having something like that shipped to me, even though I lived alone. When they arrived they were amazing, and so I ordered a bag. I don't know why I ordered medium again, as they weren't really big enough to fit well. (I didn't really understand at that point that they needed to not "just barely fit") So the next bag I got were larges, and that was heaven!

For awhile I ordered more, a bag or two at a time. It wasn't until a few months later I finally decided to get a case of large. Sooooo many diapers!

I kept trying to overnight in them, it was one of my fantasies to wake up in the morning and surprise myself with being diapered. But for at least the first few weeks I just could NOT fall asleep while wearing a diaper, it was just too much for me to relax. So I'd have to get up at like 2am and take off my diaper so I could finally get some sleep. Eventually I managed to fall asleep and check off my first "diaper to-do list" box of waking up in the morning in a diaper, and it was amazing!. Then began the slow process of being able to wet them while laying down. That one took me several weeks to pull off.

I can directly relate to DADDIES PANDA: I also had an amazing feeling of safeness and comfort the first time I was placed into a full diaper and plastic underpants and wet myself at my friend's house for a sleepover. Initially humiliated, when my friend's mom woke me up the next morning and I was completely soaked it was with her understanding words of wearing protection to bed and no wet sheets or pajamas and no one knowing this that made it seem very clear that having to wear protection made me feel better and more comfortable than worrying all night if I would wet the bed and then if I did everyone would see my wet sheets and pajamas. Though I rarely have nighttime accidents in any year now, I still wear training underwear and my PULs with that same feeling of comfort / safeness today as back then.

To be honest, my first experience wasn't the best either. Little story time here I had fantasized for as long as I can remember about wearing diapers, but never got the courage to actually go out and buy some. It was all online window shopping and wishing I had a credit card to order some Bambinos or ABUs. But when college started, I had more time and space to myself. I remember going to this pharmacy near my house and bought a pack of Depends. I had read everything about them, but they were the only ones that fit my budget.
I remember opening the package and taking one out expecting some sort of smell, either baby powder or some sort of scent, but it only had a faint plastic-like smell. I put it on and nothing. I'm a DL, so I was expecting some sort of arousal, but nothing. I was really disappointed with them. I was doubting if the years of fantasizing had been a waste of time. I hid the diapers and didn't do much for a week.
But then midterms came. I had a huge midterm and hadn't studied much. I was locked up in my room, super stressed. And for some reason, I decided to put a diaper on. Weird timing, but man am I glad to have chosen it. As soon as I put them on and sat on them, I forgot about my troubles. And things got even better when I wet it. And from that day on, I've only liked diapers more.
So my advice, don't loose your hopes just yet. Hang on to those diapers until you have a very stressful day, and try them on then. At least in my experience, you'll notice a big difference, hopefully get the wow factor we all enjoy. Cheers!

I would suggest not deliberately wetting, watch TV or read while sitting down and let the urge to pee build up gradually, after a few attempts you will get very sensuous feelings that slowly build in intensity, I find now, after much practice, that there comes a point where I pee a little, then shortly after a flood that I just can't stop, like my bladder control muscle is paralysed. I find I need to be sitting down for this to happen.