I've been looking forward to wearing nappies this weekend - I have never done this for a whole weekend before. I'm a DL and I've even deliberately messed my nappy before.
So I put on a new M4 nappy and was getting ready to go out this morning when without any warning whatever I competely lost control of my bowels and suddenly filled my nappy.
It was like I had a spasm or something. By the time I knew what was happening it was over. I wasn't even aware I needed to go.
So I cleaned up, which was not a pleasant experience and jumped back in the shower. I hurt a bit and bled as the sudden loss of control upset my piles.
Anyway I started to think about the what-ifs - what if I hadn't been wearing, what if I was a long way from home, what if I've caused this to myself by wearing etc.
I put a fresh nappy on - which I more or less had to do due to bleeding and finally went out.
By the end of it I was practically crying. It is hard to express why this was so upsetting - the complete loss of control and not being able to trust my body, worrying
that I've caused this to myself - I don't know really.
Anyway I'm sorry if this was a bit yucky and whingey, but it really upset me.
I guess I'm seaking reassurance that this was a one-off and I shouldn't worry about it too much.
So I put on a new M4 nappy and was getting ready to go out this morning when without any warning whatever I competely lost control of my bowels and suddenly filled my nappy.
It was like I had a spasm or something. By the time I knew what was happening it was over. I wasn't even aware I needed to go.
So I cleaned up, which was not a pleasant experience and jumped back in the shower. I hurt a bit and bled as the sudden loss of control upset my piles.
Anyway I started to think about the what-ifs - what if I hadn't been wearing, what if I was a long way from home, what if I've caused this to myself by wearing etc.
I put a fresh nappy on - which I more or less had to do due to bleeding and finally went out.
By the end of it I was practically crying. It is hard to express why this was so upsetting - the complete loss of control and not being able to trust my body, worrying
that I've caused this to myself - I don't know really.
Anyway I'm sorry if this was a bit yucky and whingey, but it really upset me.
I guess I'm seaking reassurance that this was a one-off and I shouldn't worry about it too much.