Confidence and Security wearing diapers

[Ellyn]

With yet another rainy day and bordering on depression, I have taken a little me time to try to get past this. I find that posting here helps so let me share how I really feel about these cloth diapers.
First and foremost let me reaffirm that I do not love or hate diapers and have worn them all of my life for urinary incontinence.
When I change, I feel comforted by the protection that they provide against making a mess, generally speaking. When I exit the shower, I have to take precautions to avoid wetting on the floor before I get the diaper on. That’s how badly my leakage has become. Once on and snuggly pinned in place, I get on with finishing dressing. I honestly appreciate the feeling of security and peace that my diapers and plastic pants provide me. Sometimes I even think of them as not keeping wetness in but everything else out…. an all important barrier against all negative things…. I believe that comes from my teen years and the possibilities of being sexually attacked that has occurred to many I knew growing up around our small town. As a child and even through high school, I wasn’t liked or accepted by most as I was the “girl that wet her diapers”, though that’s the nice way of saying what was really said…. I believe that my wearing diapers highly reduced the likelihood of becoming a victim. The ‘security of wearing diapers’ that I felt then has stayed with me in the far reaches of my mind I think.
With that and knowing that I can live a near normal life with full on urinary incontinence without anyone being the wiser, I feel very confident in most ways.
Interestingly, when I wear a disposable, I don’t have the same level on security and confidence that I feel with cloth diapers. I think it’s the bulk of cloth that I’ve been used to feeling all of my life. I also know that I feel much less confident about leaks at night with a disposable, even though I’ve worn MegaMax several nights away from home without incident. I can’t say the same about others I’ve tried, even Supremes unfortunately.

 

[babyscotty37]

I'm glad you shared. I find very similar security in wearing my diapers, especially cloth like you. I have a long story on why I started wearing them as much as possible after 5 years of age. But it had to do with the extreme bullying I experienced from k-8th grade because I wore a back and foot brace. I had an x-ray confirmed ulcer at nine years of age. Wearing diapers, except when my mom would find them and take them, helped me survive all that by allowing me to go back to 18-24 months when I had my mom's full attention. I'm a twin, but my two sisters came along shortly after and mom had her hands full while dad worked the farm. So I didn't get as much time as I think I needed to go through early surgeries and distant hospital stays away from home.

 

[leafgoalie]

With yet another rainy day and bordering on depression, I have taken a little me time to try to get past this. I find that posting here helps so let me share how I really feel about these cloth diapers.
First and foremost let me reaffirm that I do not love or hate diapers and have worn them all of my life for urinary incontinence.
When I change, I feel comforted by the protection that they provide against making a mess, generally speaking. When I exit the shower, I have to take precautions to avoid wetting on the floor before I get the diaper on. That’s how badly my leakage has become. Once on and snuggly pinned in place, I get on with finishing dressing. I honestly appreciate the feeling of security and peace that my diapers and plastic pants provide me. Sometimes I even think of them as not keeping wetness in but everything else out…. an all important barrier against all negative things…. I believe that comes from my teen years and the possibilities of being sexually attacked that has occurred to many I knew growing up around our small town. As a child and even through high school, I wasn’t liked or accepted by most as I was the “girl that wet her diapers”, though that’s the nice way of saying what was really said…. I believe that my wearing diapers highly reduced the likelihood of becoming a victim. The ‘security of wearing diapers’ that I felt then has stayed with me in the far reaches of my mind I think.
With that and knowing that I can live a near normal life with full on urinary incontinence without anyone being the wiser, I feel very confident in most ways.
Interestingly, when I wear a disposable, I don’t have the same level on security and confidence that I feel with cloth diapers. I think it’s the bulk of cloth that I’ve been used to feeling all of my life. I also know that I feel much less confident about leaks at night with a disposable, even though I’ve worn MegaMax several nights away from home without incident. I can’t say the same about others I’ve tried, even Supremes unfortunately.

I like the cloth diapers with plastic pants as well. Maybe it is just because that is what I wore when I was young. I guess it doesn't matter a lot as long as you are comfortable and confident in whatever you use. Thank you for your post!

 

[PaddedRita]

Another very good Post of yours Ellyn !!
I also feel very comforted mostly when I get change in to a clean fresh diaper !
Feel so safe ,secure and comfy and with very little worry about !!
With all the different colors & print diapers now it make it so much better and fun wearing !!

 

[PadPhilosopher]

That is a touching little insight into your heart. I really love the way you're thinking about this, and you're not alone in believing, probably correctly, that your diapers protected you against sexual assault. As an aside, it's horrible that we live in a world where this is such a problem. I think sexual assault should carry the same penalty as murder, because it murders so much of its victims hearts.

Be well, feel better, and thanks for the inspiration. We are what we choose to be, not our circumstances.

 

[DiaperedJeff]

Hi Ellyn,

I’m sad that you are feeling down. My only thought would be to concentrate on all the wonderful, positive things in your life. Diapers are just underwear after all and haven’t stopped you from building a beautiful life with a wonderful husband, family, and business. You seem to me such a positive person. I hope you get through this time ok.

 

[Ellyn]

Hi Ellyn,

I’m sad that you are feeling down. My only thought would be to concentrate on all the wonderful, positive things in your life. Diapers are just underwear after all and haven’t stopped you from building a beautiful life with a wonderful husband, family, and business. You seem to me such a positive person. I hope you get through this time ok.

I’m fine, thank you. I try to stay busy at work and dealing with my demons instead of suppressing them is always helpful.

 

[Ellyn]

That is a touching little insight into your heart. I really love the way you're thinking about this, and you're not alone in believing, probably correctly, that your diapers protected you against sexual assault. As an aside, it's horrible that we live in a world where this is such a problem. I think sexual assault should carry the same penalty as murder, because it murders so much of its victims hearts.

Be well, feel better, and thanks for the inspiration. We are what we choose to be, not our circumstances.

My husband bought me a small 9mm handgun and taught me to shoot it shortly after we married. I have a conceal carry permit too so the handgun is with me always, next to my pepper spray. Because I’m at customer offices and worksites a lot of my time, I seldom worry about attacks but it’s nice knowing I could protect myself if I have to.
Don’t mess with Texas or Texas girls!

 

[ianwee]

an all important barrier against all negative things…. I believe that comes from my teen years and the possibilities of being sexually attacked that has occurred to many I knew growing up around our small town. As a child and even through high school, I wasn’t liked or accepted by most as I was the “girl that wet her diapers”, though that’s the nice way of saying what was really said…. I believe that my wearing diapers highly reduced the likelihood of becoming a victim. The ‘security of wearing diapers’ that I felt then has stayed with me in the far reaches of my mind I think.
With that and knowing that I can live a near normal life with full on urinary incontinence without anyone being the wiser, I feel very confident in most ways.
Interestingly, when I wear a disposable, I don’t have the same level on security and confidence that I feel with cloth diapers. I think it’s the bulk of cloth that I’ve been used to feeling all of my life. I also know that I feel much less confident about leaks at night with a disposable, even though I’ve worn MegaMax several nights away from home without incident. I can’t say the same about others I’ve tried, even Supremes unfortunately.

It's just so terribly sad to read about how you felt in danger of being sexually attacked as a teenager. I know that many women have suffered in this way, and I think it is terrible that so many men behave towards women (and girls, and sometimes males too) in this sort of way.. I do agree with 'DadPhilosopher' that it is awful that this is the way things often are in our world.

I haven't read many of your posts, Ellyn, but I do get the impression that you are a strong, determined woman who has managed to overcome many obstacles and difficulties in her life, and has been able to maintain an open and positive outlook. You are a great role-model to all of us!

 

[Ellyn]

It's just so terribly sad to read about how you felt in danger of being sexually attacked as a teenager. I know that many women have suffered in this way, and I think it is terrible that so many men behave towards women (and girls, and sometimes males too) in this sort of way.. I do agree with 'DadPhilosopher' that it is awful that this is the way things often are in our world.

I haven't read many of your posts, Ellyn, but I do get the impression that you are a strong, determined woman who has managed to overcome many obstacles and difficulties in her life, and has been able to maintain an open and positive outlook. You are a great role-model to all of us!

Thank you for your kindness but back then it was a matter of getting through the day. My sister was a huge emotional supporter and likely kept me from doing harm to myself. Again, I have issues with depression sometimes but talking about it helps. My husband is a good listener but always wants to ‘fix’ it and harbors intense anger towards my parents and others for watching me go through it and not intervening more than they did.
I have been assaulted but never beyond being inappropriately touched, but there was always fear of more. Essentially, I was probably considered nasty and gross being incontinent, which likely kept the boys from taking it to the next steps. For the most part, I tried to stay to myself and invisible. One positive that resulted was making education my top priority, thus my scholarships. When I had the opportunity to leave that small west Texas town, I didn’t look back and started over. In college, I kept my incontinence a closely guarded secret, which was easier back then as my level of incontinence was relatively lite, as compared to the last several years. I’m my late sophomore or early junior year of college, I met my now husband.

 

[PadPhilosopher]

@Ellyn I am sorry you had the experiences you did, and sorry you continue to have some challenges, but glad you now have the loving support you need and a fabulous can-do attitude. You're doing it right!

 

[Edgewater]

I am one of those 'fix it' types and we can be a bit of a pain, but it is who we are and it feels 'good' to help.
As always, love your approach to life.

 

[PadPhilosopher]

I am one of those 'fix it' types and we can be a bit of a pain, but it is who we are and it feels 'good' to help.
As always, love your approach to life.

The trick is to be sensitive enough to know what is and is not helpful in a given situation. I may have experience here. But the heart to help is never a bad thing.

 

[ianwee]

My husband is a good listener but always wants to ‘fix’ it and harbors intense anger towards my parents and others for watching me go through it and not intervening more than they did.

I think I too have (in the past) tended to fall into the trap of thinking that people want me to 'fix it' for them. My ex-wife certainly felt that I did.
but as DadPhilpsopher so aptly pointed out 'The trick is to be sensitive enough to know what is and is not helpful in a given situation'. I think I have learned that now!

It's good that you can look back on the bad things that happened, and balance them against the positive outcomes in your life that you have achieved - with some help from your sister and others - but largely through your own efforts and determination. I admire your resilience and determination!

 

[Diaperman95]

I have been 24/7 almost my entire adult life. I find a great comfort in my diapers. I am a diaper lover in the since that I am so very thankful for the great high capacity diapers of today. They have given me my life back. Wearing a diaper now a days is nothing compared to the 90’s when I started. Going from changing 6 to sometimes 8 times a day to using 2 maybe 3 at most now. I hardly ever have to change in public anymore unless I a have a poop hit un exceptedly. But I love the comfort but the confidence even more. I know my mega max is never going to let me down. Thanks for the great topic.

 

[rennecfox]

That barrier between your seat and the sometimes cruel world.

 

[CrossfireHurricane]

My husband bought me a small 9mm handgun and taught me to shoot it shortly after we married. I have a conceal carry permit too so the handgun is with me always, next to my pepper spray. Because I’m at customer offices and worksites a lot of my time,

Do your customers know you wear a gun in their offices? Most offices, shops and most public events do not permit a gun, even if it's concealed.
Also consider a gun holder is more likely to be shot by an assault by gun than to non-gun holders (~4.5 times more likely for gun holders). I'm sure you are a safe, especially in a shop or office (and your own home). Thank god you don't own an assault rife. (?) Glad I don't live in Texas.

 

[Edgewater]

Do your customers know you wear a gun in their offices? Most offices, shops and most public events do not permit a gun, even if it's concealed.
Also consider a gun holder is more likely to be shot by an assault by gun than to non-gun holders (~4.5 times more likely for gun holders). I'm sure you are a safe, especially in a shop or office (and your own home). Thank god you don't own an assault rife. (?) Glad I don't live in Texas.

And, I am certain, Hurricane, that those in Texas are happy that you do not live there, as well.

FYI: Concealed Carry folks are far less likely to get shot because to carry requires ongoing training and an upfront, in-depth education of the laws involved and when and when not to unholster, their weapon, plus where there are limits and where 'open care' is allowed.

FYI: I am not sure you even know what a true Assault Rife is? Hint, it is not what the News Media thinks. Another hint, think military NATO 7.61. So, what is an Assault Rife?? Your definition please.

 

[Ellyn]

Do your customers know you wear a gun in their offices? Most offices, shops and most public events do not permit a gun, even if it's concealed.
Also consider a gun holder is more likely to be shot by an assault by gun than to non-gun holders (~4.5 times more likely for gun holders). I'm sure you are a safe, especially in a shop or office (and your own home). Thank god you don't own an assault rife. (?) Glad I don't live in Texas.

Kinda like don’t ask, don’t tell. Never any issues.

 

[SeniorMan]

I can live a near normal life with full on urinary incontinence without anyone being the wiser, I feel very confident in most ways.
Interestingly, when I wear a disposable, I don’t have the same level on security and confidence that I feel with cloth diapers. I think it’s the bulk of cloth that I’ve been used to feeling all of my life. I also know that I feel much less confident about leaks at night with a disposable, even though I’ve worn MegaMax several nights away from home without incident. I can’t say the same about others I’ve tried, even Supremes unfortunately.

Prevail diapers are all I've known as an adult. Those only are stocked by my nursing home. Their laundry doesn't launder cloth diapers. Sigh! I do feel security and confidence with the Prevail diapers.