What is your first memory of regression ?

[LittleTyke]

I'm not sure which experience was the first one, but this was an early one.

I've probably been about 5 to 7 years old. There was some sort of gathering at my maternal grandparents' house, and there were kids significantly older than me.

My grandparents had a very strange-looking high chair, for when visitors had infants with them. The older kids tried for fun to put me in that chair. I was too big to fit in the seat with my legs through the holes, so they just sat me on top of the frame.

I remember squirming and resisting, but secretly wanting to fit and sit in that chair. Heck... just remembering and writing about it makes me want to sit in that chair.

 

[Ali123]

There are so many posts here that I can relate to in part. I started liking diapers around five when my brother was born. Like SoggyRunner recounted above I was envious of my brother's diapers and the attention he was getting. I think after having my mother's undivided attention up to then it was hard to adjust to the change. So I never really regressed, I just wanted to stay little and go back to having my mother's undivided attention

If there was a point I remember regressing it was after I was sent to public school, an English boarding school that is actually a private school. I was 13 and very upset about going there. I took some diapers with me that I was sure I could hide. They were my version of a security blanket, something to reduce my anxiety.

In time they were discovered and I had a very embarrassing meeting with the housemaster. Known for being strict he was surprisingly understanding and supportive. I might even describe him as being motherly towards me and it changed my life. Happily married now I look back on that time with, strange to say, a certain fondness.

That must have been a very difficult meeting with your house master. What did he say? And did any of the other boys find out?

 

[eu38foot]

I personally wouldn't go that far... I love being a man and have found appreciation for my lessons and experiences as I've pursued my healing journey.

Masculinity isn't the problem. Toxic, unbalanced masculinity is.

I'm a teacher and the number of fatherless boys who glob onto me despite being super strict and tough on them (while also balancing that with being silly, sarcastic, and affectionate) is pretty demonstrative of a need to have a masculine outlet that feels healthy. Scouting saved my life by giving me positive male role models to show what it means to be a responsible, respectful, caring man. But, still a man that's proud to be one.

I'd never give that up no matter the possibilities.

I hope its lesson learned when you have kids of your own.

 

[Yody]

Its not all so dark. This month, I finally let go of all fear and worry and fully love myself for being an adult baby. I've told my roommate/bestfriend, and hes completely supportive of me and it has healed that wound in me that believed i could never be loved for who I am. Now i parade around the house and in public in diapers with my binky and my plushies on me and I just love life and find joy in everything again <3

 

[littleph0enix]

Hmmm I have only recently (last 6 months) been getting in to good touch with my little self so as said by others its not too easy to remember when I first regressed/ felt I enjoyed being little, having said that I think there was two main things I can remember one was that I loved long car ride as far back as I can remember. (think that would be about age 3 to 4?)
I used to love just taking in the world on a long car ride in full comfort until I felt sleepy (which was pretty often, I hear I always loved to sleep a lot ever since I was a baby somethings just never change ), I would curl right up and end up that way until the car stopped and I would then get unharmoniously awaken from my slumber haha.

The other time which I am pretty sure I somewhat regressed was when I was 6 in school, cant remember how it started but there was a small group of three older girls than me (like age 9?) that would kind of play house with me at lunch play time (don't think I really recognised that time regression until a very long time later), I say house but we didn't really pick roles.... well I was always taken care of like toddler by the three of them but always was fun so all's well and ends well?

 

[Lilschoolfox]

mum hated
Anything childish, imgeniton wss wrong, i was potty train by 1, my toys where math books then aged 13 left moved in with Uncle he had son dughter wacthed my 1st cartoon read my 1st comic best was his sister she let me try on here dress

 

[Randomname]

It’s funny because I was very slow in growing up and was pretty infantilized by my family, but I had a lot of mixed feelings about it. I didn’t want to grow up and I felt kind of comforted by being a bit “babied.” But I got teased a lot by my siblings and cousins and I felt really self-conscious about being so soft. So I also always remember feeling kind of anxious and ashamed about being treated and seen as a bit of a baby.

I was a long time bedwetter, and that was one really big area of conflict. It was part of my identity, and I was deeply embarrassed by it. Diapers were off-and-on, and I was even more embarrassed by the them, but at the same time, I definitely felt deeply “at home” in them.

First time I remember recognizing that part of me enjoyed regressing a bit, I went to an academic completion in middle school and my mom was one of the few chaperones. Most of the other kids took a van to the event and shared rooms, but my mom drove us there and bunked with me, so I was already feeling a bit out of place and childish. I initially refused to wear diapers for that trip, but of course I soaked the bed the first night. I had to stand there while my mom explained the situation to the event organizers. Then we drove to Walmart to pick up goodnights.

Maybe because that was one of the few times I was spending the night around a big group of peers who were not family already aware of my bedwetting, but I felt incredibly little during that trip. I had to walk down the hall past the other rooms to the bathrooms, deeply aware of this diaper under my pjs. I remember laying in bed that night, hearing all of these kids my age running around and having fun, as I was sharing a room with my mom in a diaper. But at the same time, I was an anxious kid who would be uncomfortable just mingling with strangers and sleeping away from home.

I remember really feeling like a little kid that trip compared to everyone else and kind of a great comfort in purposely regressing into myself

 

[MischiefManaged]

I think the one of the earliest memories for me getting into abdl would be buying a pacifier (tommee tippee cherry) and a bottle. What made me actually go buy them I'm not quite sure, but I remember watching Rory the racing car around age 6? with a bottle of custard (not sure why I did that other than being a massive custard fan) after school. My stash got caught at some point and nothing was really said, but it was bought up a couple years ago and I made a very swift conversation detour as I have attempted to keep this side secret as best as possible, although I'm pretty sure my nan knows.

 

[LittleBooandAnton]

When I was young I found 2 white tanktops and my baby towel, then I took the 2 tanktops and layed them down, and putted my towel in middle, and thought how should I lock it. I sat my small bum on it locked on the sides as a snibb and I found the most childish clothes I could put on and still slept with my first stuffie - I peed in it and found my self so little and forgot the world around me for a bit and had the best night of sleep ever that night.

That was my first regression moment even thou' my story is more than that.
You can read it in my profile about me.

 

[Lilschoolfox]

Aged 10 I was at cousin staying in her room I found her paci and uinfrom put the uniform on and dummy felt soo lil

 

[sunprincess]

I think I was around 5 sometimes I would secretly wear my pull-ups during the day. ( I usually would wear them at night for incontinence) I would play with my dolls and pretend I was a baby/toddler wearing diapers.

 

[Pampers94]

Seeing pampers at my supermarket and wanting them.

 

[TickleBee]

I think my experience of this may be different.

When I was a child I was punished by being made to wear my sister’s knickers for a spanking. Lucy is two years younger than me.

One day, after I’d had my bottom smacked while wearing her knickers I begged to be allowed to at least cover myself up. I meant that I should be allowed to put a pair of shorts on, but my mother put me into one of Lucy’s dresses.

It wasn’t just that I was being made to wear girls’ clothes. It was that they were two years too young for me.

So that was my first experience of regression.

As it became a more regular punishment I was made to wear outfits the same as Lucy, and then even younger in style than she wore. It culminated in being put back into nappies.

As a coping mechanism I pretended not to mind, and then I pretended to enjoy being dressed like that.

And over time I did actually stay to enjoy it.

So ‘regression’ started at an early age for me. Although it was intensely humiliating to start with, I did grow to love it.

That's, really messed up...but like...more than that? It's puzzling mental gymnastics.

Like, what part of that makes sense as corrective treatment? A lot of abhorant child rearing at least I can wrap my head around the thought process that gets you there.

Maybeeee I can see the very first try or two. It's embarassing and belittling and you shouldn't want to feel treated like that. But after it doesn't work? You...double down? Then triple, and quadruple down.

"This isn't working whatsoever, clearly we just need to lean INTO this." wtf?

 

[sassypigtailz]

I was a little ever since I was little.
Or rather I regressed. Some of my earliest memories of being aware of my little side included my friends saying I was cute because I was small and, also wearing overalls and just getting baby. I liked things that were babyish, and I also remember being jealous of you younger children. Also vividly remember seeing an order child not much younger than I was in a nappy and being absolutely fascinated by it.


For others who regressive littles, i.e not permanently baby for you remember the first time you felt any abdl inclination?

Weighed snowman stuffie was my savior as a bedwetter. We were inseparable until we were separated.

 

[stinkape]

I think I have always loved diapers, when I was little I would ask my mom and dad for them only to be denied .
When stressed out after a hard whooping I would fantasize about wearing diapers and being cared for like a baby .

 

[Kraiden]

I was a little ever since I was little.

This was pretty much me - I remember the toddler urge for a pacifier never left. I wanted to have one when they were taken away and that need / want of having one never stopped being an itch in my brain. Stayed with me at 3, all the way to today. Our brains can get wired at weird ways when you're in your formative years, so obviously things snowballed when I was a teen into proper AB things like regression, diapering, etc. However I was always a little in some way or another.

I still remember a few key points:

- I have a cousin who was a year younger than me, so this must have been when I was 3 and he was 2. I distinctly remember him being lifted out of a carseat when visiting my grandparents, and I was exceedingly jealous of the attention he was getting and most of all, that he was using a pacifier and I wasn't allowed one. One of those old school, blue, round pacifiers from the 80s. Still jealous to this day, I cannot put into words how badly I wanted one. Most likely this was when the switch was flipped for me, or maybe it was something earlier I don't remember.

-The same cousin getting attention and laughs because he managed to use two pacifiers at once and it was funny to everyone. Me? Still massively jealous. I could do that easily, why is he allowed to use two and I'm not allowed one anymore? Grrgh!

-Being maybe 7 and having a crappy day out with the parents because I wanted to not be hauled around a shopping center for hours on end. I saw a toddler being pushed around in a stroller, asleep with a stuffie and his paci. Once again, extremely jealous I couldn't do that anymore and was forced to walk and visit boring as F clothing stores.

-Just random things growing up between 4yo > 12yo. Mind at the most random times going "you need a pacifier", being jealous of little kids, wanting to use baby bottles, etc

Most likely could have been a coping mechanism for anxiety or other stuff, but like most people in this thread it's very much a case of "I never grew out of X when I was little"