Self Acceptance and Balance

[sdweasel]

So, I've been pretty quiet the last couple years. Focusing on my transition and the massive life changes that followed. To the extent that my Little self was mostly suppressed during that time. I made allowances, but they were small. I specifically made sure to plan for and avoid the binge part of the cycle, because I knew I'd be back.

Back on the upswing, I still find I'm struggling with a large amount of shame and self rejection. I forced myself to discuss things with my current partner, and she's working through it with me, but she has some hard limits on what she's comfortable with as a CG. I'm proud of myself just for having that conversation to begin with.

I can see that I'm pursuing external validation as a substitute for self acceptance, though. It's such a habit to hide my Little. To shy away from the outside world out of fear, even people I love and trust, because if I can't learn to accept and love myself first, I'll never be able to accept it from them.

I've tried talking to my friends, and they care and want to help, but don't really understand what I'm trying to ask. Well, the question they get, but their answers are missing the key context of what it's like to build this within myself as a Big interacting internally with my Little. Any thoughts and suggestions on where to start with this?

 

[BBBen]

Hi sdweasel,
Quite these days i had a similar question here and there wasnt any reaction. This seems to be a topic that is verry difficult to answer.

If i understand you correct you ask, how to interact with your adult me with little or baby me and give your little side the feeling it could be him- or herself.

And sometimes i think, when i ask this, people dont understand what i mean.
Behind this question is the understanding of me as adult and little at the same time. And allthough it is no divided persona from me, my adult side should interact with my babyside.

The best thing you can do is to prepare your own littletime. (As i have the same problem, all i say know is only thinking while writing an i hope that there will be some tips - but i wouldnt that this topic go down and lost again)

How to prepare little time:
- set you a time when you want to be little
- lay out all you need for diaper care. When you think it isnt enough that you own at the moment, then take adventage as adult me and buy, what you need - if is a changing mat, a blanket or little toys like a rattle
- prepare a baby bottle before going in littlespace and try to prepare the place your little should be
- perhaps you let alexa play some nursery songs or you took on a baby tv show
- try to avoid adult responsibilities while you are in littlespace: set answering machine on phone, say it to your spouse that you are in little time for a amount of time, set your doorbell of
- think about what your little could do in littlespace and prepare it: i.e. colours and paper, blocks, wooden train, snacks
- prepare the room, that nothing from outside could interrupt you from little time
- and yeah set a timer. Give you a little time but set you a line, so that you arent overwhelmed by yourself. If you feel little after that and you have time, nobody stops you to do more littletime.
- plan your littletime like a visit of another amusement activity and then there is i think the biggest boarder:

Do it! - i for myself often realise me saying: i want have little time, i want be diapered.. but then there is nothing gonna happen. Evrytime there is something else to do. But i think sometime we schouldnt give it up, because little me needs his time.

My problem is always that i say, little me is 18 months old - little me can not look fir himself. But at all we wouldnt never be our little age fully and allthough a baby needs much care from outside there will be enough things we could prepare for our babies befire, that they can realy feel their age.

Yeah its not the same stage, as then a caretaker would fully take response of baby me. But it also can be a excise of myself to never indulge more in beeing adult baby. And sometimes we have to overcome our inner bastatd. Yeah we need courage to do it - but this is there we could help us here.

At all, we didnt want to loose our spouse/girl or boyfriends / husband or wifes - and yeah we have to take care not to overwhelm them. But this shouldnt be against it, to say to her or him i prepare for me somd little time for the next i.e. 2 hours. Its like every ovver activity you dont do with them. And i think that will be acceptable. For all you need your own space.

I hope that in 2024 i for myself have the courage to plan und do for me babytime. At all i hope you can do it to you. Be CG and little