I have to disagree slightly.
This may be a bit controversial and I apologise if this upsets anyone but...
For those who are IC only then yes this is correct they didn't choose it, this is the one case where wearing diapers may not be something they can choose to do or not.
However there are other methods to cope with it that they could also choose (catheters for instance as well as medicines, surgical procedures and exercises that can help stop/reduce it) the option to wear a diaper was something they have chosen over other alternatives, Now I will also grant that maybe not everyone has access to alternatives and/or maybe the alternatives are not suitable for each person but they do exist which does make wearing diapers a choice for many who are just IC (albeit one that has to be made).
There is more evidence to this where, any good doctor will try everything they can to fix IC so that people don't need diapers, since they have such an impact on the quality of life, and will often only recommend them as a last resort unless a patient states they would prefer wearing than going through other procedures.
In this case there may be little to no choice. However for those who are ABDL and IC then the ABDL side very much is a choice, it may be just a coping mechanism to help deal with the need to wear diapers or any other reason but the ABDL lifestyle side of it you choose to partake in.
Same for anyone who is solely ABDL with no IC. You may not have any idea where the desire comes from or you may know exactly what makes you feel this way, there are hundreds, perhaps thousands of reasons why we choose to include ABDL aspects in our lives, some of those reasons may have a strong compulsion behind them but you still have the choice to partake or not.
Any one of us who are just ABDL could choose to stop wearing and leave it all behind right now, Sure it would be difficult, it would probably lead to a depression or other bad feelings and thoughts because we would be ignoring something we feel strongly about and for many of us has been there most of our lives, but the choice is there the same way that an overweight person can choose to change their life and start working out, change their diet (i.e. no gluten or sugar) and be more active, sure it's hard but it is an option.
I have been this way for 30+ years and I know that if I threw out all my nappies and ABDL stuff and never again went near anything associated with ABDL, I would really struggle probably for quite a long time as it is deeply ingrained in me now but as with anything, time, effort and practice would get me there.
I say all this not to upset anyone or to push peoples buttons but because I agree with what
@DinoFrant said here...
DinoFrant said:
Actually one my biggest breakthroughs in therapy has been the acknowledgement that I do choose this, and I choose it everyday. I have loved diapers all my life and it is such an important part of my identity because I want it to be; I accept it and embrace it with all my heart because it's been an infallible coping mechanism since I was 4 years old. What I did not choose was all the sexual abuse to which I was subject at such tender age. I also didn't choose the injury that turned me into an adult bedwetter. But it was me who got curious about my baby brother's Pampers; it was me who put them on while growing up and it's always been me who has diapered myself every single day for the past 3 years just because I choose to be diapered over not being diapered...
...The sooner you accept that you have a say in what you like to wear, the happier you will live with yourself.
While many of us may not have chosen the things that led us to discover our ABDL side (whether it be trauma, abuse, IC or some disorder like autism etc.) We do choose to wear diapers and partake in ABDL activities.
As soon as you realise it is a choice you are making then you take control of it and when you are in control self acceptance comes much easier and with that a happier life and healthier emotional wellbeing.