My husband

[Myhusband]

This has been a great thread. Reasonable question and well thought out answers and recommendations. Looks you've thought through how you'd like it to play out. I assume you're addressed any hard rules or boundaries. It sounds very exciting and I can relate to your husband and I think you're a terrific wife. Enjoy!! And hope to hear a little about it afterwards.

Thanks and will do if it actually happens.

 

[Myhusband]

Good on you for your AB/DL understanding and collaboration with your husband. I think he’s probably turned on by the humiliation aspect of involving another person. If he specifically wants a male involved I’d wonder if he has bi tendencies which would be another point of clarification. I do think the humiliation and power exchange is pretty normal. When I discussed this with my wife she wanted to talk to a friend about it for her own growth. It was a tricky decision. In the end I agreed on one of her gf’s that was open minded and who I quite frankly pictured as a bit of a dominant in a good way. For me there was trust and the notion that she would be a good fit. I actually hoped she would involve her not because I’d pictured a threesome or anything but because it would help my wife and I was comfortable with her know such a risky thing about me.
I wish you guys success. I think the FL search may take some time to find the right person.

Thanks for your response, yes maybe I should give FL another try, first time didn\t go totally according to plan and then I kindda gave up. And yes asking friends for help also may be a slippery slope.

 

[robertabdl74]

Well if your into open marriage stuff shore why not

 

[gobphus]

He would never watch, thats the common miscoception we deal with.

Thanks for clarifying that. I hope you and he can figure out a solution that will work well for both of you.

 

[RuffRuff]

This kind of sounds like the situation I am in with my wife. She has been very supportive over the years that we have been married, but there were some hard times that came with it along the way for us. We have an open marriage as well. She had no problem finding a playmate. For me, it has been difficult, because I enjoy diapers and being little too. Fetlife is hard, because most groups I am in is mostly men trying to find a mommy or woman to baby them and things. Finding a willing woman to play mommy or caregiver is like finding a needle in a hay stack. I am sure they are out there. You just have to be willing to put in work a d not give up. You are a great wife doing this for your husband. I hope you both enjoy finding playmates, and you grow in your marriage together. Always tell him that you love him, give him many hugs, and really just be there for him.

 

[BabyTheleste]

Sounds great thanks for actually reaching out and letting us know there are others that have had this converstion and understand what we are trying to accomplish. Your explination of your situation is exactly what we are looking for, no watching or threesomes Thanks again.. And I hear you about finding a willing partner.

And that's a great example of how important it is for both of you to understand and respect each other's boundaries.

In our case, I had an interest in watching, and raised it whilst in little mode, and she was very clear "Mummy wouldn't like that, and I don't think Mummy's boyfriend would too - it's private what goes on in Mummy's bedroom". And that was that - no attempt to push her beyond what was clearly a boundary.

So it's important to clear any developments that might be of concern, and we find it's best to raise them first whilst in a scene, and then confirm them subsequently. So "Would you like Mummy to bring Aunty X (a good friend of hers) round and help me with your bedtime routine" was an example that I said "Yes Mummy that would be nice", but in the grown up follow up said that on consideration I wasn't quite ready for that. If I change my mind, I know I can raise it with her, and say that I'm happy for it to happen. (I'm still plucking up the courage!)

I hope things go well for you, and look forward to hearing how things are progressing.

 

[Littlerhinoabdl]

My husband enjoys the forced to be a little and ab role play. We play on a regular basis when it suits and i am fine with it. Lately when I have made threats to tell others or even have others help out he seems overly interested so we have talked about it and he confessed that he wouldn't mind if I found someone to help out with the role play online and potentially in real time. A daddy type that would suggest discipline and such.
My question is first of all is this a normal request and secondly where would I start looking for someone like that. I have tried FetLife, it did not go as planned. Suggestions and ideas would be greatly appreciated.

Is he wanting you to be sexual with the potential partner? It may be cuckolding you need to look into?

 

[Sissyboy2807]

I can only share from my experience. My wife accept s my little side to a degree. She also knows I have a feminine side. We did this like 3-5 years ago. It was fun at the time but it had more negatives than positives.
I told my wife I kind of had a bi side but this open marriage was only possible if I did stuff with another male. I was actually okay with that. My wife would have been too jealous if I did things with other girls ( even though she did things with guys/it's what we both wanted. I'm kind of a sissy she isn't in to what I'm into as much as I am)

• It was definitely more fun on paper/fantasy than reality.
• It worked at that specific time of our lives. Now it wouldn't work for us.
• The risk or STDs and pregnancy are real with these kind of things.And some women don't like using protection because it's not as good.
• Some guys put no effort into this. Some guys were not that good at intimacy and sometimes they were too good.
• Sometimes it felt like real relationships. Sometimes they felt like they were in love. Or they get mad when your doing things with other guys.
• Some guys lie on FetLife and say their single when in fact they have a spouse who doesn't know. A lady just a week ago asked my wife if she did things with him years ago. She now is married to him and has kids with him and told my wife that she said she never married him. She wasn't mad at my wife but this is the kinda of things that happen.
• I had weird experiences too. People lying about their age and using different photos.
• One time my wife told me that the one guy gave her a kiss on the lips goodbye. It was just odd. I didn't care too much.

These things do happen as it's important to stay open and honest. I told my wife I wasn't going to get jealous but I did and it was just because he was just talking with her kind of like a spouse would. I wasn't jealous of the intimacy parts but when they were just texting after and such. That's my experiences. If you have any questions just let .e know.

It was fun for me but my wife got stressed out. I personally would keep doing it but it's different saying that as the guy. It also right now In our lives wouldn't work for us now. But I'm glad we at least tried. It's like drinking. It creates some fun times but the consequences are there too.

 

[gobphus]

I can only share from my experience. My wife accept s my little side to a degree. She also knows I have a feminine side. We did this like 3-5 years ago. It was fun at the time but it had more negatives than positives.
I told my wife I kind of had a bi side but this open marriage was only possible if I did stuff with another male. I was actually okay with that. My wife would have been too jealous if I did things with other girls ( even though she did things with guys/it's what we both wanted. I'm kind of a sissy she isn't in to what I'm into as much as I am)

• It was definitely more fun on paper/fantasy than reality.
• It worked at that specific time of our lives. Now it wouldn't work for us.
• The risk or STDs and pregnancy are real with these kind of things.And some women don't like using protection because it's not as good.
• Some guys put no effort into this. Some guys were not that good at intimacy and sometimes they were too good.
• Sometimes it felt like real relationships. Sometimes they felt like they were in love. Or they get mad when your doing things with other guys.
• Some guys lie on FetLife and say their single when in fact they have a spouse who doesn't know. A lady just a week ago asked my wife if she did things with him years ago. She now is married to him and has kids with him and told my wife that she said she never married him. She wasn't mad at my wife but this is the kinda of things that happen.
• I had weird experiences too. People lying about their age and using different photos.
• One time my wife told me that the one guy gave her a kiss on the lips goodbye. It was just odd. I didn't care too much.

These things do happen as it's important to stay open and honest. I told my wife I wasn't going to get jealous but I did and it was just because he was just talking with her kind of like a spouse would. I wasn't jealous of the intimacy parts but when they were just texting after and such. That's my experiences. If you have any questions just let .e know.

It was fun for me but my wife got stressed out. I personally would keep doing it but it's different saying that as the guy. It also right now In our lives wouldn't work for us now. But I'm glad we at least tried. It's like drinking. It creates some fun times but the consequences are there too.

The STD risk is reall. I know of a case that led to oral cancer and death. Very sad.

 

[Babyjimmy1813]

I wish you luck. Years ago I had a mommy who decided to date other men since I did not satisfy her sexually. But she kept me as her baby. She finally found a man I called Daddy (Bob),
He was so understanding with me and accepting. Not cock hold at all. I was always in the baby room when they went to bed together. He would help change me and discipline. What a nice dady.

 

[Diapertoddler]

Try doublelist and in the search jusy type diaper. You may or may not find what you're looking for. As others have stated this can turn into quite the risky event.

 

[Stephlau2000]

My husband enjoys the forced to be a little and ab role play. We play on a regular basis when it suits and i am fine with it. Lately when I have made threats to tell others or even have others help out he seems overly interested so we have talked about it and he confessed that he wouldn't mind if I found someone to help out with the role play online and potentially in real time. A daddy type that would suggest discipline and such.
My question is first of all is this a normal request and secondly where would I start looking for someone like that. I have tried FetLife, it did not go as planned. Suggestions and ideas would be greatly appreciated.

I really wish I could discuss this with my wife like you can with your husband. I have been married for 16 years and my wife had no idea of my sissy, special girl - school girl or ADBL side.
If there are any members in Melbourne I would love to meet you.
Stephanie

 

[PrettyAlice]

And that's a great example of how important it is for both of you to understand and respect each other's boundaries.

In our case, I had an interest in watching, and raised it whilst in little mode, and she was very clear "Mummy wouldn't like that, and I don't think Mummy's boyfriend would too - it's private what goes on in Mummy's bedroom". And that was that - no attempt to push her beyond what was clearly a boundary.

So it's important to clear any developments that might be of concern, and we find it's best to raise them first whilst in a scene, and then confirm them subsequently. So "Would you like Mummy to bring Aunty X (a good friend of hers) round and help me with your bedtime routine" was an example that I said "Yes Mummy that would be nice", but in the grown up follow up said that on consideration I wasn't quite ready for that. If I change my mind, I know I can raise it with her, and say that I'm happy for it to happen. (I'm still plucking up the courage!)

I hope things go well for you, and look forward to hearing how things are progressing.

 

[PrettyAlice]

Your Mummy was absolutely right to tell you that she and her boyfriend did not wish you to view their lovemaking. It is totally private and absolutely nothing to do with her little girl. It was totally wrong of you to ask. Did Mummy punish you as a result? How does her boyfriend treat you? Does he accept you as Mummy's little girl. Do you call him Daddy? Are you respectful?

I know that some male lovers do adopt a parent/Daddy role with little girls like you which may include the administration of punishments.

 

[mammalun]

My husband enjoys the forced to be a little and ab role play. We play on a regular basis when it suits and i am fine with it. Lately when I have made threats to tell others or even have others help out he seems overly interested so we have talked about it and he confessed that he wouldn't mind if I found someone to help out with the role play online and potentially in real time. A daddy type that would suggest discipline and such.
My question is first of all is this a normal request and secondly where would I start looking for someone like that. I have tried FetLife, it did not go as planned. Suggestions and ideas would be greatly appreciated.

I don't know how "normal" such a request is but I know it's something I've spoken about with my Little. He has put control over the who, when, how to me. And we've spoken a lot about the kind of person we have in mind etc. And that it will take time to find the right person, which he accepts. After all, it took him long enough to find me.

Something to consider is whether you want this to be a one off scene or whether you want to involve the other person in a longer term thing. That affects the kind of person you look for, where you look, and what information needs to get shared. I'd be really, really careful about who you let into it though. Not all kinks are socially acceptable and those of us who are not ABDL but that love someone who is can sometimes forget the huge amount of prejudice/ hate this kink can cause. We owe it to our partners to protect them from that as much as we can. Good luck.