Having once been continent

[Diaperman95]

I feel like I'm borderline. I have BPH with OAB and leaking somewhat day and night. Recently I tried wearing regular underwear and woke up in the morning to damp underwear with a wet spot. Pads aren't cutting it at night either because I toss and turn a lot. I've resigned myself to using a pullup or cloth training pants at night. During the day at work I use pads for the most part. However I've gone from one all day to 3 a day. When I travel I use a pullup or Tena Maxi-slip for ease of changing.

you need good tight underwear for any type of pads.
I have a good tip if you are using lighter duty pull ups and want to stay fresh extended periods without the hassle of changing them. Put on two pair, the when in public or at work if you becomes too wet or uncomfortable when go to the restroom pull down the outer ones tear the sides out of the inner and dispose. Pull pant back up instant change no need to carry a extra pullup to the rest room or pull pants and shoes off. Those thinner pull ups no one can could tell if you had 3 on. I do it with 2 seni super pull ups sometimes. Just a Idea. Hope it helps you or someone.

 

[TheWetOne]

I grew up with fairly severe incontinence issues, both day and night. I wet the bed (or I should say wet my nappy!) every night until my early teens, and didn't stop completely until I was about 15. I also overcame my daytime wetting at about the same time, and I thought I was finally "normal" and didn't need nappies any more.
But it only lasted about 15 years; I began wetting the bed again around the age of 30, and was back in nappies at night by the age of 40. For many years I only had problems at night, but I did eventually start having daytime accidents as well and I would often wear during the day as well as a precaution. Then I got prostte cancer, and after the prostatectomy I became totally urinary incontinent, and am now in nappies 24/7.
It doesn't bother me, and to be honest, growing up in nappies means that I am so used to it that to me wearing a nappy feels normal.

 

[Pino]

I am in Group #1 but i am incontinent just for about 21 month, i was continent from three years on, now i am 45 years old.

"Are you actively pursuing trying to return to using little to no protection?"

Yes, i do. At the moment Botox is really helpful to reduce incontinence issues, but this will probably not going on forever.
Of course the Botox will not cure the nerve damage, so i know i cant be really continent ever again.

When the Botox hits the best effectiveness, i forget really fast how it is without it. I am not completely continent than, but it increases about 70% to 90%. You get used to be mostly continent so fast. Really.
It is hard when the effectiveness goes down again and you realize your are still incontinent and how much that sucks sometimes.
It is difficult to describe. For now i am happy to be (mostly) without diapers during the summer.

"What do you think your relationship to continence is like?"

It is still something i would prefer. - but i am not worried about it any more, i have got other medical problems, that are more severe than wearing a diaper as a solution. I can handle this well, i would not tell anybody, beside my closest family, but when friends would "discover" i think this would be no bigger problem for me.

But before i would consider "real" operations, like a sacral nerv stimulater, i would choose diapers first, at least this is how i think about it now.

 

[tiron101]

There are a lot of posts in this forum from two large and valid groups of people, namely:

1. people who are starting to experience increasing continence difficulty
2. people who have been incontinent since a very young age and who don't know anything else

I am wondering how many people here were once continent — that is, people who were able to achieve functionally complete continence, leave diapers, etc., but eventually developed sufficiently severe continence issues that they needed to start using significant protection again, and have been doing so for a significant amount of time, say 10+ years. How has that been for you? What do you think your relationship to continence is like? Are you actively pursuing trying to return to using little to no protection?

This thread was prompted by thinking about my own experience with continence. I'm 28 this year. I did originally achieve continence, but between toilet training very late, semi-voluntarily returning to diapers just before I turned 18, and intermittent difficulty retaining continence in the interim, I think the aggregate amount of time I spent functionally continent was somewhere in the 7-to-8-year area. For comparison, I have now been in diapers continuously for about 10 years and have had continence issues that precluded (at least some aspects of) using the toilet for at least 9 of those, so I have been incontinent continuously for longer than the total time I was continent.

I feel like I have a weird relationship to continence certainly for someone who was once continent, but even among people who are currently incontinent. I was wondering if anyone else had similar experiences.

For me #1. I did not have the ability to shut off the flow until I was in my mid teens which I later found is unusual. I had some memorable daytime accidents in my pants until that age, but not after that. I also had overactive bladder symptoms that I remember going back to a young age, for which I also saw the doctor. The overactive bladder has been a constant issue for me. I also have wet the bed as an adult pretty steadily since around 30 for which I used protection.

In my 30s, I started wearing protection as a precaution during the day for specific circumstances due to the overactive bladder problems as well as inflammatory bowel disease. (I rarely have #2 accidents, but I want to be 100% sure that if I do have one, it's contained.)

Over time between 30 and early 40s, I had increasing problems with heavy bedwetting and daytime urgency. Only looking back can I see how it steadily progressed. Of course I spent a lot of time with doctors trying to sort this out, but had virtually no success.

What pushed me over the edge was the pandemic. When so many bathrooms were closed, I had no good options, so I began wearing protection during the day a lot when I went out. As I got used to them I was wearing them more during the day at home too. During that time I sort of organically began having wet days more often because I didn't have to deal with the bladder problems or urgency with diapers. I still do have a good amount of control as well as a solid capacity of over a liter at times. But the variable capacity when my OAB is bad on top of the urgency and frequency get the best of me and sometimes result in wetting no matter what. I do what I can to retain/restore continence but it seems like more of a token gesture for the long haul. The longer trend still goes in the direction of gradually becoming completely wet.

 

[Napincolove]

I guess I qualify for this category as I had control of my bladder from once potty trained until around 38 ish when control (holding on) was becoming a bit of an issue.
Up until around 6 or 7 everything was as normal as the next person then the awful coach trip changed my capacity only until around 38 when again it all went downhill.