In the next section titled "The Non-Sexual Adult Baby and the Home Environment", she writes:
It is a finding of this study that non-sexual ABs, whose practice evolved to mitigate overwhelming affect, may experience themselves as being limited in how to meet those regressive needs as an adult (see Chapter Five). If non-sexual ABs do not have a private or secure space, or faith that anyone accessing this space is trustworthy, it may mean they feel unable to engage in AB practice. This holds implications for ABs who live with partners, roommates or parents where there is not a level of surety that their AB equipment will not be discovered. Additionally, this recognises there are implications for people with TIARP, they feeling unable to engage in the self-soothing behaviours that regressive practice provides, the fear of discovery impeding practice.
Again, I don't think these findings are surprising to any of us. She wrote a few sentences about this earlier in the paper, but I wish she had given this more attention because it's a very important topic. This is a very real problem to many of us that live with spouses, parents, children or room mates, and it's a source of a significant amount of distress we experience as ABDLs. ADISC is full of posts describing an inability to wear diapers due to a lack of privacy or a spouse who is not supportive. I have a lot of empathy for people in those situations because I've been there before.
When you're faced with overwhelming emotions and you know to soothe yourself, but aren't able to due to your home environment, that's when people often turn to unhealthy coping mechanisms like substance abuse or self-harm. Diapers are such an effective way to self-soothe, and are so benign when compared to the alternatives, it's sad that they are often not available to us when we need them the most.
She also addresses the challenges of being ABDL as a child:
This invites a further questioning of the impact of such restrictions on children with TIARP. This is in recognition of people who experience a drive to regress whilst still in their chronological childhood, as expanded upon previously. It is not an unreasonable supposition that children whose AB configuration is as a result of enduring ACEs are held hostage to caregivers who, being unable to provide adequate care for the child, would likely reject regressive drives to wear nappies or play with toys designed for younger children; a double-bind where the environment causes a need to self-soothe, via regressive behaviours, but the environment simultaneously precludes such self-care.
There are a lot of things I miss about my childhood, but one thing I don't miss is the emotional pain of wanting to wear diapers and regress but not being able to. That was a secret I could never tell my parents, and they wouldn't have been supportive if I had told them. They probably would have sent me to therapy (which probably wouldn't have been a bad thing), but they wouldn't have let me wear diapers around the house. It was better to just keep it a secret until I turned 18 and moved out and could then wear diapers in the privacy of my apartment.
"Held hostage" seems like an extreme way to describe it for a lot of cases though. Like many of you, I don't think my parents were bad people, they just had their own psychological issues they were dealing with and they didn't deliberately try to cause me pain. But on the other hand, regardless of their intentions, I did experience a lot of emotional pain as a child and I did often feel like without access to diapers I had no way to soothe myself. I often just repressed the urge to regress and told myself that I just had to wait until I was an adult. It was a very difficult time, so maybe hostage is an appropriate way to describe it. When I got my first apartment and bought my first pack of adult diapers I felt like I was finally free.