Went to my first ABDL munch last night

[DiaperedBondageBoy]

An ABDL group in my area had its first munch in a long time last night, and I took the opportunity to go and meet other ABDLs. I had never met other ABDLs in person (that I know of) prior to last night, and it was good to finally do so. Everyone was very approachable and friendly, and we had a good time talking about ABDL and other stuff.

The only downside is that most of the people there were men, and the women there all seemed to be taken. I had hoped to meet a potential mommy there. So while I met a lot of good people, I didn't meet THE person I wanted to meet. But overall, it was good to meet other ABDLs in person for the first time.

 

[LilHotRod]

Good job getting offline and getting out to try to meet people in person. However, from what I’ve been told, going in search of a mommy is going about it the wrong way. You should instead be going to make connections and friends, building networks. That can lead to getting you vetted for events and parties where you can meet even more people and enable your friends and connections to vouch for you and possibly introduce you to a mommy or offer suggestions for someone you should reach out to.

Also worth noting, another thing I’ve heard is that while finding a partner in the kink community can prevent you from having to have that awkward “coming out of the closet” conversation, having similar interests outside of kink is more important if trying to build a long-term relationship. So, with that being said, don’t rule out vanillas. Finding someone open-minded, nonjudgmental, and accepting can get you a mommy too.

As someone who has had both mommies I’ve converted from vanillas and already kinky ones, there are pros and cons to each. Not sure which type I want my next one to be, but I try to keep an open mind rather than limiting myself.

 

[DiaperedBondageBoy]

Good job getting offline and getting out to try to meet people in person. However, from what I’ve been told, going in search of a mommy is going about it the wrong way. You should instead be going to make connections and friends, building networks. That can lead to getting you vetted for events and parties where you can meet even more people and enable your friends and connections to vouch for you and possibly introduce you to a mommy or offer suggestions for someone you should reach out to.

Also worth noting, another thing I’ve heard is that while finding a partner in the kink community can prevent you from having to have that awkward “coming out of the closet” conversation, having similar interests outside of kink is more important if trying to build a long-term relationship. So, with that being said, don’t rule out vanillas. Finding someone open-minded, nonjudgmental, and accepting can get you a mommy too.

As someone who has had both mommies I’ve converted from vanillas and already kinky ones, there are pros and cons to each. Not sure which type I want my next one to be, but I try to keep an open mind rather than limiting myself.

Finding an open-minded person is probably the more likely scenario (although I fear that both are extremely unlikely), but if I do meet a mommy at a munch event, of course I'll try to build a relationship with her.

 

[ColinInDiapers]

I’d love to go to an abdl munch or at least meet other like minded people in real life. Because this community has really been there for me. It’s allowed me to explore who I am. Any suggestions on how to look for abdl munches?

 

[Cottontail]

Any suggestions on how to look for abdl munches?

Check your local ABDL group(s) on FetLife. For better or worse, it’s one of the only places that advertises this stuff effectively. And if you’re not already a member, prepare to put on blinders and look straight ahead. Searching for anything on FetLife is basically running a gauntlet of amateur porn.

 

[ColinInDiapers]

Check your local ABDL group(s) on FetLife. For better or worse, it’s one of the only places that advertises this stuff effectively. And if you’re not already a member, prepare to put on blinders and look straight ahead. Searching for anything on FetLife is basically running a gauntlet of amateur porn.

I’m a member of fetlife I just have a hard time finding abdl related stuff

 

[Jorelaxed]

I wish we had those here in Vegas, they never really seem to catch on here locally.

 

[Jorelaxed]

I am probably gonna have to go to one out of state more than likely

 

[Cottontail]

I’m a member of fetlife I just have a hard time finding abdl related stuff

A quick glance found the following FetLife groups:

• Nashville Adult Babies and Littles
• ABDL Tennessee
• East Tennessee ABDL
• ABDLs of West Tennessee

The Nashville one has about 600 members. I didn’t look closely at the others. Log in, search one of the names above, and then click the Groups tab to see only group hits.

(I’m not linking them directly because that’s against ADISC rules.)

 

[newAB43]

I went to my first munch last week, myself - not an abdl one, but just meeting different kinksters. Networking is a great skill to polish in order to get vetted for other kink events or places that can open you up to other possibilities. Keep an open mind, and keep putting in the work to get what you want.

 

[alpacad]

A quick glance found the following FetLife groups:

• Nashville Adult Babies and Littles
• ABDL Tennessee
• East Tennessee ABDL
• ABDLs of West Tennessee

The Nashville one has about 600 members. I didn’t look closely at the others. Log in, search one of the names above, and then click the Groups tab to see only group hits.

(I’m not linking them directly because that’s against ADISC rules.)

There's also a Fetlife group "The Ultimate Directory of Fetlife ABDL Groups" with long lists of ABDL related groups.

 

[DiaperedBondageBoy]

I’d love to go to an abdl munch or at least meet other like minded people in real life. Because this community has really been there for me. It’s allowed me to explore who I am. Any suggestions on how to look for abdl munches?

Make a Fetlife account.

 

[DiaperedBondageBoy]

A quick glance found the following FetLife groups:

• Nashville Adult Babies and Littles
• ABDL Tennessee
• East Tennessee ABDL
• ABDLs of West Tennessee

The Nashville one has about 600 members. I didn’t look closely at the others. Log in, search one of the names above, and then click the Groups tab to see only group hits.

(I’m not linking them directly because that’s against ADISC rules.)

Wow. I'm in Louisville Kentucky, which doesn't seem to have very many ABDLs. I thought there were a lot in Indianapolis, but it seems there are more in Nashville!

 

[LilHotRod]

Just another thought: there are plenty of people who have been to multiple munches and have yet to meet THE person. I’m glad you seemed to enjoy yourself regardless. Not to sound like a jerk, but what made you think you’d meet THE one at your first munch? Sure, it’s possible but rather unlikely. Continue to attend without expectations of finding THE one. They say people turn up when you’re not looking and least expect it. Especially not looking desperate and thirsty. Perhaps, the single women looking for a little weren’t there this month. Not sure how old you are or how long you’ve been in the community. You ought to take a look at other threads. Don’t mean to burst your bubble but many will tell you the supply and demand of Mommies for littles is very much unbalanced and not in the littles’ favor. A switch might be an option too. I actually have met a single Mommy at a munch before. Emphasis on “a” single Mommy and I’ve probably attended up to a dozen or so.

I thought there was a thriving ABDL community in Vegas. Guess I was making an assumption since there’s a brick and mortar shop there. Sure they must fulfill many online orders but if they have a store front, chances are there are a good amount of people that patronize it in person since it’s still in business to my knowledge. Maybe stop by and see who you run into. They might have info on local munches and events. Heck, the employees probably do as well. Tykables is local to me. I picked up an order in person and that’s how I discovered CAPCon, which was actually my first time meeting other community members and then I began attending munches (backwards, I know but it’s how the timing worked out). I have friends in Indianapolis and attended a rather large munch down there once. Very good turn out. Another place with a physical store (although closed now, pending court judgment). Never been but Indy Dreamworld just happened in that area as well.

Yes, you can search for events on FL within a chosen radius of a chosen location. Not to be overlooked are general kink or BDSM events. I have heard of Dommes and Mistresses giving Mommying a try. Kind of a middle ground rather than trying to introduce this kink to a vanilla.

Finding an open-minded person is probably the more likely scenario (although I fear that both are extremely unlikely), but if I do meet a mommy at a munch event, of course I'll try to build a relationship with her.

I wouldn’t say extremely unlikely in terms of an open-minded person. Like I said, this is what happened to me with one of the mommies I had. I really lucked out too. She was to this day, the one and only vanilla I have come out to and she embraced it, even more than me at times. You gotta remember that if someone really cares about you and wants you to be happy, they may be willing to give things a try. There are plenty of blog articles and podcast episodes that give tips about introducing this to a vanilla partner in ways that don’t make you come off as a creepy deviant weirdo.

 

[DiaperedBondageBoy]

Not to sound like a jerk, but what made you think you’d meet THE one at your first munch? Sure, it’s possible but rather unlikely. Continue to attend without expectations of finding THE one.

I knew it was unlikely, but if I didn't do it, my chances were zero. A low chance is better than a zero chance.

I wouldn’t say extremely unlikely in terms of an open-minded person.

I have to find someone who's okay with changing wet/messy/cummy diapers. There can't be very many women who are into that or are even willing to try it. And that's half the problem. She also has to be into ME. She may love changing wet/messy/cummy diapers but be totally repulsed by the idea of changing MY wet/messy/cummy diapers.

 

[Sissyboy2807]

A few things. Try to at least get yourself in the best shape possible. Get your body hot enough and the girls will basically come to you. From there if they have an open mind they will likely just.think it's cute.

Who knows like others have said. At least making friends and connections is a good start. Maybe one day they might want to explore more and have an abdl party or something.Im jealous that you are able to go to those even though my wife accepts me for who I am. Our brains always want more.

Provide something interesting. Are you a funny person. A good story teller etc. It takes time. Who knows I used to only want to find a mommy but I then started thinking it would be fun to have a daddy too.

"with changing wet/messy/cummy diapers". When you say that that is just creepy vibes.

Fetlife is a lot of waste of time. You get everyone just using you as a booty chat. Everyone just likes to pretend they want to actually hang out just to leave you hanging.

I first was trying to give you some advise but after reading your comments I would tell the lady a lot of the creepy vibes I am getting.

 

[LilHotRod]

Whoa, whoa, whoa! Easy there. Take a deep breath and calm down. Are you looking for a relationship or a kink dispenser? You are coming off as desperate and it’s not a good look. What are you willing to offer a mommy? You may want to look into finding an adult nursery and hiring a professional mommy to get that itch scratched at this rate. Maybe hit up the nursing homes and find the employees who truly love what they do and aren’t in it for the money and can’t get enough of it solely at work. I have to agree: you are giving off creepy vibes.

For those of you who can’t find munches in your area, start your own. Sure, it will probably start out small. Technically, two people in attendance can be considered a munch. You can use FL to advertise it and in time, it may grow.

 

[DiaperedBondageBoy]

What are you willing to offer a mommy?

I'll try any of her kinks that she may want to as long as they don't involve bleeding, serious pain, or a real risk of being injured.

finding an adult nursery and hiring a professional mommy

Do these exist? And if they do, how much do they cost? Although to be honest, I can't help but feel like by doing this I'll be admitting that the only way a woman would ever want to be my mommy is if I paid her to.

you are giving off creepy vibes.

Of course I am. I'm terrible at dating even without kinks coming into play. It seems hopeless.

 

[LilHotRod]

Well, with an attitude like that, no wonder. Confidence goes a long way my friend and there is something to be said for: “Fake it til you make it.”

From the sounds of it, you have not yet been in this type of relationship before. So, I take it your ideal of the perfect mommy comes from porn and erotica? You gotta remember that there is a difference between fantasy and reality. We have our preferences and standards of course, but making a checklist really limits you so be careful about that.

Yes, pay-for-play, findoms, and pro mommies really exist. Rates vary. I’ve seen $200 per hour before. But, even with them, they too require consent have their limits.

Paying does not have to be the only way to get yourself a mommy. But, you need to work on your approach and overall demeanor.

 

[DiaperedBondageBoy]

Well, with an attitude like that, no wonder. Confidence goes a long way my friend and there is something to be said for: “Fake it til you make it.”

No I haven't, and I'm so worried I never will. I'll keep trying, but it doesn't look good.