Try to be discreet and no choice.

[lilshelly]

I am a person that I try to be as discreet as possible when it comes to my diapers. Not ashamed of them I just try to be respectful. I made a 5 hour trip. Had dinner with my husband and then we were going to drive the five hours home. On the way there I found myself to be pretty wet.
We went to dinner I decided as we were getting ready to go home that I didn't want to wear a wet diaper for 5 hours.
Usually I have my diaper bag and diapers and supplies. I had a diaper and that was pretty much it. I ended up taking the diaper in without concealing it and going to the bathroom.
The only thing that I was able to do is get changed and get out of there and make the drive home.

 

[slimjiminy]

That had to be uncomfortable. You did what you had to. My sympathies.

 

[Jorelaxed]

That must have been very unnerving, I usually carry mine in a plastic grocery bag into the rest areas to change after long drives.

 

[richieboy]

I am a person that I try to be as discreet as possible when it comes to my diapers. Not ashamed of them I just try to be respectful. I made a 5 hour trip. Had dinner with my husband and then we were going to drive the five hours home. On the way there I found myself to be pretty wet.
We went to dinner I decided as we were getting ready to go home that I didn't want to wear a wet diaper for 5 hours.
Usually I have my diaper bag and diapers and supplies. I had a diaper and that was pretty much it. I ended up taking the diaper in without concealing it and going to the bathroom.
The only thing that I was able to do is get changed and get out of there and make the drive home.

Good for you you had to do what you needed to do!
PS:
try and find a closer restaurant

 

[247]

I am a person that I try to be as discreet as possible when it comes to my diapers. Not ashamed of them I just try to be respectful. I made a 5 hour trip. Had dinner with my husband and then we were going to drive the five hours home. On the way there I found myself to be pretty wet.
We went to dinner I decided as we were getting ready to go home that I didn't want to wear a wet diaper for 5 hours.
Usually I have my diaper bag and diapers and supplies. I had a diaper and that was pretty much it. I ended up taking the diaper in without concealing it and going to the bathroom.
The only thing that I was able to do is get changed and get out of there and make the drive home.

“I ended up taking the diaper in without concealing it”

I’m curious, why on this occasion did you choose not to conceal it?

Was it a conscious choice of, i don’t have time for this, why hide it or i really don’t care?

In similar situations i’ve put it under my arm inside a jacket, under my top etc.

Just curious as to what changed that day?

 

[Napincolove]

My Nappy wearing is top secret and being discrete is always my priority, I doubt anyone that knows me will be even suspicious that I am a fully paid up member of the ic Nappy wearers club.
Only immediate family know plus of course medics.

 

[ParaRomeo]

First issue and something I have issues with but I have a head injury and memory is crap but if you are truly medically incont it's like anything medical like meds you need to make sure you have what you need. It happened earlier technically yesterday I was like 20 mins away from home when I realized I forgot my backpack at home yes I have emergency kits but I try not to use them so had to go back and get my bag because it holds other medical needs as well

As for trying to be discreet here is the thing you can try your hardest and I do it but there are times where someone is going to know either directly or indirectly the best you can do is up to you. I have had a few times were(my situation is different)I knew all I needed was a quick change so I tucked a diaper need stuff under my shirt and changing pad behind me(in a wheelchair it helps to hide stuff) went and changed no backpack needed.

Now I personally have had times where I forgot to pack my bag and fortunately was at a hospital I knew people & got stuff but I tried to hide it minute it was given to me. But here is the thing everyone is different there are some that aren't and don't hide it nor care what others think me personally I opt for discretion at all costs, I have had times when in the hospital where aids or nurse were slightly mad that I wouldn't say what I needed over the intercom but personally I am not doing that. But like I belong to an organization where there is an older man who will say and almost yell when he is going to change his diaper(pullup) that man gives no F's but they also battled cancer a few times and few other things.So some are more open than other like that person I mentioned I gave him a bunch of pullups that I couldn't use he used to talk openly about it fortunately there weren't many around and explained or asked be not mentioned my name or where he got things to others as my medical issues are mine and not for others to know & he respected me and discreet about it.

But there are others and not picking on anyone (as you do you) but some on the abdl side that want the attention, looks, or get their rocks off and they make their needs public notice and want people to know what they doing. Their are those on the IC side and disabled side that will discreetly openly carry stuff but usually it's worse case like no options. But here is other side and important part about road trips for most part you might be somewhere that no one knows you so if something happens it is what it is and chances are no one is going to notice you nor remember you as long you didn't make it a big deal most are tied up in their own lives. I once used a family bathroom while out of town but forgot to lock outer door and was using the inner stall with locked door and even though I said it was in use lady still changed her kid and left & when I was done I rolled out no one was waiting no one batted an eye through I have good tradecraft I can guarantee no one was looking but honestly that person had similar thoughts get in get changed and get back on the road only exception is if she needed to pee she had to use a different one. So honestly no one really cares most people have enough crap on their mind or glued to their phone unless you or your partner made it public knowledge!!

 

[lilshelly]

Just curious as to what changed that day

I normally have a bag ready in the car for such changes like this but I didn't have it with me this time. I don't usually make 10+ hour drives. Most of the time I can get home in an hour or two. Poor planning on my part.
As for concealment, I do not run around waving my diaper around. I just go in wherever I may have to ask where a bathroom is. In my experience if I have to carry just the diaper in somewhere with me I feel better just doing what I have to do and be done with it. If I try to hide it under my shirt or something it makes it feel like I am doing something wrong and honestly I am not. I am taking care of a basic need.
I have heard of people who like to and do what they can to possibly "get caught" for the thrill of it. When you have to deal with IC there is no fun in it.
The reason for my post is to share that there are times even when you try to be discreet that it just doesn't always work out.
The best thing you can do is be respectful of others and do what you need to do.

 

[Bnuuy]

Don't you have anything like a plastic grocery bag or something in the car you could carry the diaper in? I feel like that would be a little more discreet without being something weird like trying to hide it under your shirt.

(Maybe that works better as a backup option if your car is a mess and you have random stuff in it )

 

[babyscotty37]

I am a person that I try to be as discreet as possible when it comes to my diapers. Not ashamed of them I just try to be respectful. I made a 5 hour trip. Had dinner with my husband and then we were going to drive the five hours home. On the way there I found myself to be pretty wet.
We went to dinner I decided as we were getting ready to go home that I didn't want to wear a wet diaper for 5 hours.
Usually I have my diaper bag and diapers and supplies. I had a diaper and that was pretty much it. I ended up taking the diaper in without concealing it and going to the bathroom.
The only thing that I was able to do is get changed and get out of there and make the drive home.

Nothing is worse than being caught unprepared when needing to wear diapers. This has happened too often to me over the years, no matter what past lessons I may have learned. I started keeping one of those reusable bags in my car with a spare diaper in a plastic bag. Worse case, I have to go into a gas station, or other location, carrying a discrete plastic bag. I then have something to place the wet one in before I come out of the stall so no one actually sees what I have and then toss it in the trash. This is saved me a couple of times in the last few years. But if my diaper reaches capacity before I can change, and leaks, I don't have a practical backup with me all the time.

 

[Wetshisbed]

I keep spare nappies and pants, cream etc in my car.

 

[Wetshisbed]

My Nappy wearing is top secret and being discrete is always my priority, I doubt anyone that knows me will be even suspicious that I am a fully paid up member of the ic Nappy wearers club.
Only immediate family know plus of course medics.

Most of my friends and family know I wear nappies

 

[mickdl]

Well, I was also a bit forgetful at the beginning... Two things helped:

1) I got me an extra "aid bag" - I take when I do not have my work bag. I also have a bag in the car with a change of clothes.

2) Both bags are equipped with airtags. As a result, the cell phone reports when I go out without the bag.

The work bag I have never forgotten - the new bag at the beginning already often. Therefore, the tracker has saved my butt a few times when I was not traveling by car.

 

[247]

Don't you have anything like a plastic grocery bag or something in the car you could carry the diaper in? I feel like that would be a little more discreet without being something weird like trying to hide it under your shirt.

(Maybe that works better as a backup option if your car is a mess and you have random stuff in it )

Never in a position myself where I have just a bare diaper or nappy, just doesn’t happen. I would have to make a conscious effort to be in such a situation.

When i go out i have either:

Diaper in a soft ipad zipper protective bag with disposable bag and a disabled toilet access key.

The same setup but with slightly more room for an ipad, raises fewer questions and quite useful to have ipad with me.

One of the above in my laptop bag.

One of the above in my small rucksack bag. In the bag i will generally carry more supplies such as spare plastic pants, wipes, additional disposable bags and additional diaper but all in a bag so not on view if i unzip my bag to take something else.

It’s not so much a conscious effort but where do you put a diaper when you take it from the pack of 24?

If I had to take out of a suitcase, I’d have clothing to wrap it in.

Now if somebody sees me going to the toilet with an ipad bag and thinks, hmmmm bet there’s a nappy in there, then that’s where I draw the line as to the length i need to go to be discrete.

 

[hbic60]

Not have been in a similar situation yet, but you might be prepared for every thinkable situation, once might come the day for everyone where even the unthinkable simply happens.
If it's coming to that, keep your head up as you did. You have simply a medical condition, and you have a reasonable solution for it, and (usually) every IC person among us is being outside usually as discreet as possible about that. If any situation is given where 100% discreteness is not possible, I'd simply go through it - still as discreet as possible within those circumstances - without shame and embarrassment. Later on you might also laugh about it with your partner - humor instead of shame might be a good solution to get over it!

 

[sport1]

I am a person that I try to be as discreet as possible when it comes to my diapers. Not ashamed of them I just try to be respectful. I made a 5 hour trip. Had dinner with my husband and then we were going to drive the five hours home. On the way there I found myself to be pretty wet.
We went to dinner I decided as we were getting ready to go home that I didn't want to wear a wet diaper for 5 hours.
Usually I have my diaper bag and diapers and supplies. I had a diaper and that was pretty much it. I ended up taking the diaper in without concealing it and going to the bathroom.
The only thing that I was able to do is get changed and get out of there and make the drive home.

That was tough.

 

[Edgewater]

Having been U-IC for a very long time had taught me many lessens! For each bad moment, I have learned and made changes!

The most important lesson: Life Is Way To Short!!

 

[TommyTheDiaperDuck]

When I am home idc if people see my diaper now. if I am out in public its a little different, But I know I should not be worried if people find out in public.

 

[InconLifer]

Discretion's sort of a relative thing for me depending on where I am. Gone are the days are trying to keep it a complete 110% secret from everyone I come across. My physiotherapist knows as do medical people I've come across (indeed, I needed help changing when I was in A&E last year which was pretty humiliating).

I'd be utterly mortified if anyone at uni found out though and, as I said in another thread, I'm probably the most anxious around people my own age. I'd hate to share a room with someone for example. Fortunately, that hasn't happened.

In terms of my parents, given they have to help me change now and again it's not like there's anything to hide and so when it's hot in the summer I just wear a t-shirt.

In hotels I tend to leave some products out as a way to tell the housekeeping team what's in the bin bags I bring so it doesn't seem weird. Now I'm in a wheelchair I guess most people just figure it's part of my condition, which it is to to be fair. Whilst I've had lifelong issues, Long Covid made things so much worse.

I find discretion's a funny thing though. When I was at school my life was effectively trying to cover up accident and mask smells (which became a real nightmare when I was in the Sixth Form and had to wear a suit which was only dry cleaned once a week) and I realised that wearing protection is probably more discreet (or at worst, as indiscreet) as the alternative.