The Look

[newt]

I call it "The Look." The moment when you're talking with someone and they glance down and it seems like they stare right at the diaper and they know. Is there a leak or an unfortunate bulge that is obvious despite my best efforts? Or was it just an innocent, random glance that my anxiety convinces me otherwise?

I was definitely hypersensitive to this in the beginning, but not as much anymore. I still notice it happening every so often, but when it does it doesn't fill me with anywhere near as anxiety as it did before.

Does anyone else notice this or is it just me? What do you do when it happens?

 

[slimjiminy]

I had "The Look" when I first started wearing pull-ups, the kind that swell out the front after peeing. I didn't realize that I was getting the look until I got home and then realized how obvious it was. The young guy loading my truck with the new lawn mower (in a box), had this look but I just chalked it up to someone that didn't like his job. At the time I just thanked him and climbed into the truck to drive home. Oh well!

 

[JDCH]

It's mostly just being hypersensitive. Most people are utterly clueless about the things happening right in front of them.

The only time I know for certain that I got the look was because part of my diaper was exposed and I was not aware of it. But two teen girls saw, giggled loudly, uttered many "OMGs" and I definitely heard the word diaper. This prompted a check from me and there was no doubt I was exposed.

 

[newt]

It's mostly just being hypersensitive. Most people are utterly clueless about the things happening right in front of them.

The only time I know for certain that I got the look was because part of my diaper was exposed and I was not aware of it. But two teen girls saw, giggled loudly, uttered many "OMGs" and I definitely heard the word diaper. This prompted a check from me and there was no doubt I was exposed.

Yeah, I definitely agree that 98% of "The Looks" are just innocent looks. Which is more the types that I wonder about. Because in the time before IC and diapers, its the type of look I wouldn't have even registered. But when you're in diapers its so much easier to misattribute a random glance to a "they know about my diapers" look.

I'm not concerned really about them anymore, but the thought will still always cross my mind.

I had "The Look" when I first started wearing pull-ups, the kind that swell out the front after peeing. I didn't realize that I was getting the look until I got home and then realized how obvious it was. The young guy loading my truck with the new lawn mower (in a box), had this look but I just chalked it up to someone that didn't like his job. At the time I just thanked him and climbed into the truck to drive home. Oh well!

These are the looks that are much worse. The ones that you cannot deny that the question was raised in their mind.

 

[sport1]

One day as my wife was leaving had a small accident, she said look the front of my sweats were starting to show.

 

[fredy552]

I wear diapers (briefs) with a booster and plastic pants and I have a slight bulge in front do not know about the back know as the day goes on I am showing more and as I have had accidents when at work and nowhere to change. My night diaper is especially bulging when I wake up wet and do not change my diaper right away in the morning but the wife is the only one seeing me with my wet diaper.

 

[Regularnot]

The first time I got "the look" was at the gym; thats when I realized that one pair of workout shorts was double layer, and one was single layer.... I had previously checked in the mirror to make sure they were hidden, but that was with the double layer shorts. The single layer was almost see-through!

 

[cantwait]

I call it "The Look." The moment when you're talking with someone and they glance down and it seems like they stare right at the diaper and they know. Is there a leak or an unfortunate bulge that is obvious despite my best efforts? Or was it just an innocent, random glance that my anxiety convinces me otherwise?

I was definitely hypersensitive to this in the beginning, but not as much anymore. I still notice it happening every so often, but when it does it doesn't fill me with anywhere near as anxiety as it did before.

Does anyone else notice this or is it just me? What do you do when it happens?

I have often wondered the same thing.

 

[247]

Personally experienced the “The look” on multiple occasions and by the same individuals where instead of receiving the usual eye contact you’re aware they’re staring directly at your crotch. I don’t think they’re aware that they are flagging this to you. I can sympathise with females who may experience eye contact at chest level rather than direct eye contact when holding a conversation.

This experience was in the working environment, with people I new well. Always while having a 1:1 conversation. My involuntary reflex was always to open conversation almost apologising with the prefix of “Sorry, ….” I could never I understand my involuntary reflex.

I always thought the look was of curiosity and suspicion, rather than of confirmation of you’re wearing a nappy/diaper. So I’m of the opinion that it’s a matter of being “outed” previously and the individual looking for signs you are indeed wearing again rather than being spotted for the first time.

My suspicion is that somebody spotted my wearing previously without me being aware and perhaps discussed with others without my knowing. Hence, the curiosity “The look” whilst engaging me in conversation.

This is one reason I don’t buy the opinion “nobody knows you are wearing”.

At the time I wore pull-ups to deal with my downward spiral to IC and eventual resignation to needing more absorbant and secure nappies/diapers 247.

I suspect the rear of my pull-up may have been spotted whilst sitting at my desk by a secretary sitting behind me and then shared with my boss at the time. That or a bulge being detected by someone at some point.

Oh well

 

[NotTheAverageMan]

Tena maxi and Ultima are great in that way, they dont show off much bulge neither in the fron r back. I’m grateful that these are the ones I get from my continence nurse. Whereas for betterdry and other brands, there’s a distinct bulge in the front and back

 

[UrgentWees]

Yes, I’ve had the look more than a few times. A couple of times it’s been because I’ve done an embarrassingly loud wee while in conversation and the rest have been because my nappy was noticeably swollen at the front because I was unable to change as early as I should have. I wouldn’t know if I get the look from behind but I’m sure it happens every now and again.

 

[Diaperman95]

I really stopped looking to see if others are looking at me. I do the best I can to keep covered in relax clothing and not go out in soaking wet saggy diapers. The only time I get super self conscious anymore is when I have a #2 in public places. I cant control what others think about me.

 

[Wetshisbed]

In the almost 11 years of wearing nappies fulltime I can't honestly say I have experienced anyone noticing. I used to worry people would notice I wear nappies but soon realised no one cares.I no longer care if people notice.

 

[Wetshisbed]

One day as my wife was leaving had a small accident, she said look the front of my sweats were starting to show.

My wife is the only one who would notice if my nappy is bulging excessively.

 

[greatlake5]

My now-girlfriend (for at least a year) outed me in a private conversation at a restaurant. She has been a rend for 5 years+. She actually asked if I was wearing a diaper. I finally had to say "yes, I'm IC and I wear a diaper." She's not bothered about it.

 

[Edgewater]

Long, long ago, in a galaxy far, far away - like 45 years ago, a time when I first started wear. My cloth multilayered diaper with thick plastic pants was likely clearly noticeable. Now a-days, when I wear a NS MEGAMAX with their Trifecta diaper cover, I may get a look. But I have elected to believe that they are overwhelmed by my horse sized guy parts!

Yup, from time to time, someone may notice, but it is important to remember that you are simply doing your part to keep the environment dryer and/or a bit cleaner!!

Don't let it screw with your head!! Enjoy, Life Is Way To Short!!

 

[schooner]

I have been wearing mostly 24/7 since 2006 (BetterDry, booster and plastic pants), and my wife insists that she can't tell that I'm wearing a diaper. I do dress appropriately and change my diaper every three to four hours, and that certainly helps. If I changed once a day, the wet diaper would probably swell up so much that it would be enormous and noticeable. I'm discrete and realize that most people aren't going to notice, unless they are somehow clued in...i.e. they know I wear diapers already, they wear diapers themselves or they know someone who does.

 

[JustMe]

I really stopped looking to see if others are looking at me. I do the best I can to keep covered in relax clothing and not go out in soaking wet saggy diapers. The only time I get super self conscious anymore is when I have a #2 in public places. I cant control what others think about me.

Likewise, if someone gives me “the look”, I don’t even notice anymore! But like @Diaperman95 I do my part and wear clothing that hides things well. Especially if I’m in a cloth diaper. i’m of the belief that 98% of the people out there don’t notice. Frankly, the only one who does notice is my spouse. Every once in a while, she tells me I’m looking a bit ”bulky” which is my signal to change things up.

 

[Tulip247]

Which diaper is best of office in the summer? I'm looking to start to ware them. Thank you in advance

 

[Diaperman95]

Which diaper is best of office in the summer? I'm looking to start to ware them. Thank you in advance

You have listed yourself as incontinent as well as everything else, but then say you are thinking of starting to wear diapers and want advise. You mentioned in another post you have thought about wearing diapers but do not know if you could. I do not mean no disrespect but your profile confuses me. I would think as a incontinent person you would have some experience with diapers or pull ups and have to use some kind of protection daily. But As a incontinent AB,DL you should had certainly tried diapers. Incontinence implies your bladder leak's, or empties without control and is reserved for people that have a medical condition that forces them to wear diapers or pads.

Like for real I mean no disrespect you are welcome to be your real self here without judgement. So if you are new to the ABDL lifestyle and diapers I and everyone else here is more than willing to give you advise. It just is confusing to understand a real since of who you are and why you are here when your profile and post are giving mixed signals.

If I a way off my apology. Letting us know what experience you have with diapers and how you now manage incontinence will help us to make recommendations on what products you should try. The real secrete to wearing in public is to wear loose relax fit clothing. I wear relax fit jeans 2 sizes bigger in my waste but I use a braided elastic belt to hold the up so my diaper does not show. The belt is made from small braided bungy cords about the size of paracord and walmart sells them for ten bucks. Then I wear a untucked shirt 1size larger and I can wear about any brand and size diaper I want. My preferred band is NS Mega Max, these ae a heavy duty diaper that hold a lot. They are plastic back and they have a plastic landing strip that the tapes close on too. This makes them stay on tight and snug with out the tabs coming loose causing sagging no matter how active you are. Some diapers really suck at staying on snug and a loss fit diaper is a leak waiting to happen. But it truly depends on why you wear and how often you are using the diaper. If it is for just incase and most the time you use the toilet then I would recommend a lighter duty diaper. But your clothing choice is the biggest way to hide a diaper.

my attuited is I do not have a choice in the matter. My bladder and my colon empty on their own terms so I do the same thing any one else with the same condition would do. i wear a diaper, I can't just let it run down my leg. In 30 yeas of using diapers I found out the only one interested in my underwear choice is me. People that do not wear diapers never are thinking bout them and they never wonder if the guy inline in front of them might be wearing a diaper. Most are to busy looking at their phone to care what is going on around them anyway.

Welcome To ADISC I hope I did not scare you off. I just have found a lot of new members will list incontinent out of fear of judgement for liking diapers. But know one here is going to judge you for any of it and you can open up and be yourself. Just out of respect for incontinent members your post kind of confused me. Either way you are amongst friends here and I hope you get something out of becoming a member. We have some truly great members for all reasons.

I purchase my diapers NorthShore and use the mega max but they have several absorbencies and are some of the finest diapers made. If you would like to try some completely free samples shipped to your door at no cost follow this link.... https://www.northshorecare.com/sampleprogram