Angelapinks said:
First of all I think you need to talk to a Legal Aid lawyer to see if they can help you get the Trust fund for the schooling you want. This situation is not helping your mental state and may also be making it worse. Is that what they want for you ? Yes you need a clean break as it seems unles you follow your fathers dreams they will not be supportive of you in any way and that is just sad. I know how you feel in some ways as my family was a little like that when I was growing up. From age 11 onward I told them I was really a girl and wanted to take dance lessons (Ballet) of course this set my father off in a big way as he was British Air Force and believed in a military style upbringing. After talking with my doctor who had already talked with my parents, they all said they would send me to a mental Institution if I didn't buck up and fly right. No support there so I had to try and go with the flow but also do my own thing. I never went to talk with a Mental health professional about my feelings and Transgender was something that seemed to be only in Europe at the time with doctors only just learning about it. Although I lived at home until I was 20, I stayed away from my dad as much as possible and slowly my mother seemed to see the real me and teach me girly things like cooking sewing Crochet and knitting and she never critisized my clothing as being too girly. I wish you well in the future and hope you can find some support somewhere. My family did slowly come around a little bit but it took years of me proving I knew who I was and proving I could make it on my own while still keeping family in the picture.
@Angelapinks
Thank you so much for your kind and sincere response. I truly appreciate the support I've found within this community, including yours.
While I have considered seeking legal assistance to access my trust fund, I fear that it would only worsen the situation with my family. In an ideal scenario, I would sit down with my parents and try to convince them to participate in family therapy sessions with a therapist, aiming to minimize the arguments and improve communication. However, given that my parents are divorced, I'm uncertain if my dad or mom would be willing to agree to counseling.
My older siblings have suggested a couple of options. One is to find a compromise with my father and return to work in construction for him, even though it doesn't align with my true passions. The other option is to focus on building up my own savings and taking out a college loan. If I succeed in college, there's a possibility that my dad might be more willing to offer support.
Taking care of my own well-being means asserting my own aspirations and gaining independence from the toxic dynamics at home. It's discouraging to feel unsupported in pursuing my dreams, and I acknowledge that this situation may be contributing to my depression. I understand the importance of prioritizing my own growth and happiness, even if it means breaking away from my family's expectations.
I'm sorry to hear that you also experienced a lack of support from your family while growing up. It's unfortunate when parents don't embrace and encourage their children's authentic selves. I can relate to your journey and the challenges you faced.
In fact, I've also been grappling with my gender identity. While I don't consider myself transgender, I believe I may be gender fluid. I've always had a desire to express myself as a Femboy, embracing the Kawaii Japanese style of cute fashion and pastel-colored clothes that resonate with both my AB/DL persona and my Sissy side. However, I often feel embarrassed because I don't have the "ideal" body figure to fully embrace the Femboy aesthetic. Growing up, I enjoyed dressing up and embracing my femininity, but I was often met with negativity from my childhood friends & parents who had a narrow view of masculinity. I faced bullying for simply painting my nails, wearing eyeliner, and loving artists like Hannah Montana, the Jonas Brothers, and Avril Lavigne.
Finding a way to navigate societal expectations while staying true to oneself is indeed a delicate balance. Your courage in embracing your gender identity and dressing as you like without shame or embarrassment is inspiring. I wish I had the same courage to fully embrace my own true self.
The gradual acceptance and support you got from your mom are heartwarming, showing that change can happen over time.
I really appreciate your well wishes and encouragement. It's reassuring to know that even if families may not fully understand or accept us immediately, there is hope for greater understanding and acceptance in the long run. I will continue to strive for my own happiness, proving to myself and others that I can create a fulfilling life while trying to keep family connections intact, even if it means establishing necessary boundaries. Even though I want to cut off all communication with my family, I don't know if I could.
My older brother said
“
Show them kindness and empathy, show them you can be happy without them, and smother them with your own kindness.
All they want is for you to be safe”.
Once again, thank you so much for your kindness and for sharing your own experiences. I really appreciate your words.
I'm glad you feel supported here. I'm also glad you are feeling encouraged! Yes, while I do say, "dare to dream", I've been learning to "dare to act". We will never live that dream unless we dare to act. 
