Most of the time incontinent and just using diapers

[slimjiminy]

... While I can live day by day without a diaper, the consequence of not wearing one is having to be within range of a restroom at all times. The challenge comes from those occasional situations where a restroom is not nearby and the urge hits and one is forced to do everything in their power to hold it and fight the pain.

Even when the restroom is in range, if you're living with a spouse and adult children, that restroom may be occupied when you need it. Tonight, just as my wife went into the bathroom, I suddenly felt my bowels go wild trying to push it out. I had to sit in the computer chair, and clench with all I had to get through the moment. My wife has her own issues, which requires time on the toilet. If I was to do it all again, I'd NEVER buy a house with just one bathroom!

 

[iam32bit]

Even when the restroom is in range, if you're living with a spouse and adult children, that restroom may be occupied when you need it. Tonight, just as my wife went into the bathroom, I suddenly felt my bowels go wild trying to push it out. I had to sit in the computer chair, and clench with all I had to get through the moment. My wife has her own issues, which requires time on the toilet. If I was to do it all again, I'd NEVER buy a house with just one bathroom!

This is why I have the master bedroom in our 4 bedroom apartment. My need for the restroom was something my roommates considered and ultimately led to me having my own bathroom. Had I not had this room, I am certain I would be in diapers far more often.

 

[Napincolove]

I usually try to use the bathroom but if outside or away from home and I am not next to a toilet then the Nappy takes the strain and that's what they are for, they are life savers for those of us with issues that would otherwise be debilitating!
There is no shame in it !

 

[Rob110]

I gave up the fight years a go Im now 7 plus years diapered 24/7 I no longer worry about making it to the bathroom when I need to pee I simply use my diaper I do make a dash for the bathroom if I need to have a bowel movement.

I have lost my remain control over the years it just happened more quickly once I stopped the futal attempt to make it to the bathroom

 

[Freddie07601]

I appreciate this discussion. I, also, am incontinent and I've worn diapers 24/7 for the past 22 years. The fact that I have always liked wearing diapers and felt safe in them has generated conflicted thoughts and anxiety at times. I've asked myself if it's really incontinence or just me seeking an excuse for wearing diapers all the time.

I am finally free of anxiety, happily diapered, and using my diapers without feeling any need to justify my choice. My incontinence is real, and, when offered meds, devices, or any other kind of treatment that might lessen the need for diapers, I quietly but firmly decline.

 

[virginiadiaper]

I gave up the fight years a go Im now 7 plus years diapered 24/7 I no longer worry about making it to the bathroom when I need to pee I simply use my diaper I do make a dash for the bathroom if I need to have a bowel movement.

I have lost my remain control over the years it just happened more quickly once I stopped the futal attempt to make it to the bathroom

Thanks everyone for the replies. I do fear that whatever control that remains will be lost more quickly. Nonetheless, I can’t get to the bathroom so frequently and worry about it anymore. While I’ve been in diapers for a while now, I’ve given up using a bathroom this past week. The stress level is much better now.

 

[Twinmom]

That's how I've felt for the most part today. Tried regular underwear twice. Big fail. I'm like I'm not gonna make it anyway why worry about trying

 

[virginiadiaper]

That's how I've felt for the most part today. Tried regular underwear twice. Big fail. I'm like I'm not gonna make it anyway why worry about trying

Good for you. I had regular underwear on for like 10 minutes between diaper changes and a big wet spot showed up in the underwear. I get it about not worrying about trying as I’m right there with you. I’m done with regular underwear at this point.

 

[eastcoastdl]

I still try to maintain my pelvic floor muscles, but it's a balance between holding on too long and letting go too soon. I normally try to let it go before any pain, but I'm concerned that if I totally abandon all control that it could lead to bowel incontinence. It's been almost 6 years and I have maintained regular bowel movements despite urinary IC, so I'm hopeful it'll stay this way.

 

[virginiadiaper]

I still try to maintain my pelvic floor muscles, but it's a balance between holding on too long and letting go too soon. I normally try to let it go before any pain, but I'm concerned that if I totally abandon all control that it could lead to bowel incontinence. It's been almost 6 years and I have maintained regular bowel movements despite urinary IC, so I'm hopeful it'll stay this way.

I haven't had any issues with bowel control and hope not to do so. Does that typically follow urinary incontinence even if it is primarily a bladder problem? I agree that it comes a point that it is so uncomfortable quickly that holding on any longer is painful instead of just using the diaper.

 

[slimjiminy]

I still try to maintain my pelvic floor muscles, but it's a balance between holding on too long and letting go too soon. I normally try to let it go before any pain, but I'm concerned that if I totally abandon all control that it could lead to bowel incontinence. It's been almost 6 years and I have maintained regular bowel movements despite urinary IC, so I'm hopeful it'll stay this way.

It has been my hope that my IC was only going to be urinary. But starting last August fate has proven that things are changing. I've had to trade pull-ups for diapers when I go out away from home unless I know a toilet is close by (like at church). I am also taking desperate measures like not having coffee before I head out. Sheesh, I how I do miss my coffee!

 

[eastcoastdl]

I haven't had any issues with bowel control and hope not to do so. Does that typically follow urinary incontinence even if it is primarily a bladder problem? I agree that it comes a point that it is so uncomfortable quickly that holding on any longer is painful instead of just using the diaper.

it doesn't *necessarily* follow, but can depending on the reason causing your IC. Some pathologies are more likely than others to lead to it, but I'm no doctor so I can't give particular examples. I have been occaisonally doing kegel exercises but I'm not sure how much that helps.

 

[Dinotopian2002]

I've been in diapers 24/7 my whole adult life, and even though I do have a few dry days now and then, I always wear diapers.
In addition to my OAB which is caused by nerve damage, being unable to walk well means I need to use a wheelchair most of the time - which throws up more access issues. I use a toilet when I can but that's not always possible.

My control levels can fluctuate wildly, sometimes my bladder is almost normal - but other times it will empty with no warning. And I'd rather wear a diaper than risk an accident.

My bowel control is pretty good most of the time but I do sometimes have to go in my diaper - again it's due to a broken nervous system so there's not much I can do about it.

Most of the time I'm okay with it now, but there are still some times where it really gets to me and erodes my self-confidence. One of the things that I've found which helps with that is wearing thicker diapers so I have more peace of mind about it.

Breathe Deep, Seek Peace
Dinotopian2002

 

[StarWars7]

So I’ve suffered from urinary incontinence now for 2.5 years. I’ve tried various meds and even had surgery for a bladder blockage. I still pee like at least every hour or more frequently. Sometimes I could make it to the bathroom and other times the urge was too much so I just used the diaper. When I have the frequency flares, I just stop trying to go to the restroom constantly and just use the diaper instead. I’m afraid it’ll make the incontinence worse, but I also can’t live life running to the bathroom or worried that I would pee my pants. I feel guilty sometimes just using the diapers when I could likely have made it to the bathroom.

Have others who have a lot of frequency just used your diapers instead of going to the bathroom so frequently? Did the guilt eventually get better? Did it make the incontinence worse with time?

Always use my diaper usually never make it.

 

[StarWars7]

I gave up the fight years a go Im now 7 plus years diapered 24/7 I no longer worry about making it to the bathroom when I need to pee I simply use my diaper I do make a dash for the bathroom if I need to have a bowel movement.

I have lost my remain control over the years it just happened more quickly once I stopped the futal attempt to make it to the bathroom

Me too gave up. 7 years diaper dependent.
But do try to go to the toilet for bowels but I usually use my diaper

 

[virginiadiaper]

Me too gave up. 7 years diaper dependent.
But do try to go to the toilet for bowels but I usually use my diaper

I dislike the wording that we gave up. I like to think we are accepting of our needs. In the 1-2 weeks of only using a diaper, I have far less stress about it all and function better without being in the bathroom all day. I do notice I go smaller amounts and more frequently already which leads to less diaper leaks too. I’m hoping my bowels still work in the future though.

 

[winterheart01]

I maintain a voiding schedule and wear diapers.

On good days I maintain a voiding schedule during waking hours; empty my bladder in the toilet every hour and a half. This helps maintains my bladder health, while reducing the amount of diapers required. I wear a diaper for incontinence issues between scheduled voiding times. This prevents possible bladder distention, and allows participation in the outside world.

Using a diaper will not make your incontinence worse. Keep a food and drink diary and see if you see a correlation between certain foods and/or drinks and your bladder flaring up. Maintain some sort of voiding schedule, especially on bad days. Knowing you are being pro-active means that the diaper is literally there to be able to function... use it as needed.

Well, using diapers 24/7 does increase the urge (or in other words, shortens the time between the i need to go feeling).

Going too often to the toilet does that too though.

But yes truly incontinent you won't become from diapers.
As far as voiding schedules, i tried out italuv's advice (or was it yours, i forgot) to use an incontinence clamp from bard medical ( i had to import that from the US because it's not for sale here :s) and while i have to be careful when moving around (the clamp tends to slip over that ridge on the penis shaft when bending a lot) , it does allow my bladder to fill once in a while and reduce the nr of diapers i need, but I'm not allowed to do this too much because of the bacterial build up, chronic bladder neck infection from e-colli bacteria is nasty and hard to get rid of.
But at least my bladder can wash itself once in a while so to speak, to prevent bladder stones etc.

I can't go on a timely basis because I don't have a sphincter anymore and it runs out every minute or so, just a splotch each time depending on how much I drank.

But the last urine test 2weeks ago was positive, no bacteria. So surgery is still a success.
Last sample test in 6 months and then it's just a yearly checkup. Doc was happy to see I'm finally rid of those annoying infections, blockades , retention etc. Bladder was empty without any effort when he did the sonar while I was wearing protection.
The only sacrifice i had to make for it is impotence, it's very difficult to get it to work but that's not important. My health is

Ah yes, forgot to mention i take back my negative opinion of the clamp. If applied properly it's not painful, though if i don't unclamp it hourly i get discomfort in the scarred urethra.
But it's a very useful thing for when I need to get a urine sample too

 

[virginiadiaper]

Well, using diapers 24/7 does increase the urge (or in other words, shortens the time between the i need to go feeling).

Going too often to the toilet does that too though.

But yes truly incontinent you won't become from diapers.
As far as voiding schedules, i tried out italuv's advice (or was it yours, i forgot) to use an incontinence clamp from bard medical ( i had to import that from the US because it's not for sale here :s) and while i have to be careful when moving around (the clamp tends to slip over that ridge on the penis shaft when bending a lot) , it does allow my bladder to fill once in a while and reduce the nr of diapers i need, but I'm not allowed to do this too much because of the bacterial build up, chronic bladder neck infection from e-colli bacteria is nasty and hard to get rid of.
But at least my bladder can wash itself once in a while so to speak, to prevent bladder stones etc.

I can't go on a timely basis because I don't have a sphincter anymore and it runs out every minute or so, just a splotch each time depending on how much I drank.

But the last urine test 2weeks ago was positive, no bacteria. So surgery is still a success.
Last sample test in 6 months and then it's just a yearly checkup. Doc was happy to see I'm finally rid of those annoying infections, blockades , retention etc. Bladder was empty without any effort when he did the sonar while I was wearing protection.
The only sacrifice i had to make for it is impotence, it's very difficult to get it to work but that's not important. My health is

Ah yes, forgot to mention i take back my negative opinion of the clamp. If applied properly it's not painful, though if i don't unclamp it hourly i get discomfort in the scarred urethra.
But it's a very useful thing for when I need to get a urine sample too

I don’t have an internal functioning sphincter anymore as they removed part of it. So now when I gotta go, I gotta go pee right then. Hence, I just use diapers now 24/7 as the urgency was terrible. The external sphincter is still there but it just can’t hold it for too long.

So glad that you got over your infection! That would suck to have for so long.

 

[winterheart01]

I don’t have an internal functioning sphincter anymore as they removed part of it. So now when I gotta go, I gotta go pee right then. Hence, I just use diapers now 24/7 as the urgency was terrible. The external sphincter is still there but it just can’t hold it for too long.

So glad that you got over your infection! That would suck to have for so long.

They tried removing parts of the sphincter with me first too but either it grew back together or wasn't enough. So in the end they removed everything.
I can still feel when it comes but then it literally comes , no time to hold it. Except for squeezing the urethra when I'm not dressed of course

 

[virginiadiaper]

They tried removing parts of the sphincter with me first too but either it grew back together or wasn't enough. So in the end they removed everything.
I can still feel when it comes but then it literally comes , no time to hold it. Except for squeezing the urethra when I'm not dressed of course

Did they only do surgery on the internal sphincter and bladder neck? I have no idea why the external one can’t hold it all but it can’t for either of us.