Is it wrong for me to want to stay incontinent and have it progress?

[BabyHailey1977]

I think you should have posted on another ADISC forum. This is for IC people who accept or simply want to discus IC issues. Your welcome here, I just wish you have focused more on "normal" IC issues. Not wanting to be diaper dependent.

He is incontinent, and the title explained what the topic was. You didn’t have to read it. I’m not trying to be rude, just saying.

 

[greatlake5]

He is incontinent, and the title explained what the topic was. You didn’t have to read it. I’m not trying to be rude, just saying.

I read it. I stand on my comment.

 

[BabyHailey1977]

I read it. I stand on my comment.

And that’s fine. One thing I don’t like on ADISC is when others tell others what to do.

 

[greatlake5]

Simply read the IC forum header. Moo has added this header to tell others here on the IC forum that it's not for wanting IC. Simple. Clear. The poster says he's IC. But I doubt that. I could be wrong but his post shows he wants to be IC. Typical for ab/dl members that like to pretend.

 

[BabyHailey1977]

Simply read the IC forum header. Moo has added this header to tell others here on the IC forum that it's not for wanting IC. Simple. Clear. The poster says he's IC. But I doubt that. I could be wrong but his post shows he wants to be IC. Typical for ab/dl members that like to pretend.

Yeah, but honestly, you aren’t an admin. What gives you the right to question his authenticity?

 

[Milo]

Simply read the IC forum header. Moo has added this header to tell others here on the IC forum that it's not for wanting IC. Simple. Clear. The poster says he's IC. But I doubt that. I could be wrong but his post shows he wants to be IC. Typical for ab/dl members that like to pretend.

Reading the header, I am IC, I am being respectful of others that are IC, I am not asking for medical advice, and in no way, shape, or form have I asked how to become IC.
I accept that you have a different opinion, but making false accusations is just disrespectful, and shows now empathy for other's situations. I have images of the MRI, ultrasound, and x-ray. I do not feel any inclination to prove to a stranger that I am pissing my pants, but I have the images, and the paper trail of grotesquely expensive bill statements and recommendations from my urologist showing that I have some form of incontinence.

I want to hear other people's statements, and I am more than willing to discuss whatever. But, making a claim without evidence, about a person you have never met, is just dumb.

 

[theancientmariner]

I am not trying to force my incontinence, and I'm actually doing the opposite. What makes me happiest is the loss of control, needing to wear, rather than just wanting. I would love for things to progress, but not of my own accord. I get very strong urges, but I do my best to hold in the earlier urges, and only use the bathroom when I am almost to my breaking point. I know that if I went every time I had an urge, my bladder would shrink, causing more urges, and I would be enabling that. I do not want to force it, I just want things to happen naturally, and have my leaks eventually turn into full voids.

My situation is definitely better for wearing than yours, and I am sorry to hear that you are so cramped. I live with my boyfriend and best friend. My boyfriend is not thrilled that I have to wear something 24/7, but he has always enabled my ABDL side and is happy for me. My best friend does not care if I walk around my house with just a diaper on. It is a little awkward wearing around my mom and other friends, but I have told them my situation and they do not care, but they do push fixes onto me.

I'm here to support your healthiness. I don't like seeing people loosing control and becoming IC, but I'm not going to push my opinions on you. You're lucky to have a SO that cares for you and accepts who you are. I wouldn't however walk around the house without a cover on like you do, but that's my insecurities, not yours. I wish you the best and hope you do what's best for yourself, and your happiness.

 

[hbic60]

Insofar I agree to greatllake5's comments that this thread is - as multiple ones before - one of those more or less "borderline" threads where it's worth to discuss if it really belongs into the IC forum.
The general question of Milo - do I have to follow the suggestions of: meds (oxybutynin), two possible treatment options consisting of botox injections every six months, or a surgical implant attached to the nerve connecting to the bladder or can't I simply manage my condition with wearing diapers - is in my eyes a valid question in IC forum, and in my eyes everyone is the master of his own body and is the only one (as far as mentally healthy) who decides which treatment is done and which one not. So, asking just this question, would have been in my eyes totally fine here in IC forum)
On the other hand telling that this is very appreciated, and a strong wish for being IC is behind this, is a no-go in IC forum and is far beyond of accepting one's condition which is usually and often discussed - and is against the rules stated in the forums header.

Especially if a poster states in his profile to be near everything (Adult Baby+Diaper Lover+Babyfur+Diaperfur+Little+Incontinent) one should be careful what and how to post in Incontinence Forum ...

 

[Edgewater]

And, this Thread has fallen into precisely where I had guessed that it would.
I remain with my original statement: "I am very hesitant to Post."
I had hoped that it would not, but this has evolved to near textbook 'Flaming'!!

I have heard enough and I am moving on! I am done with this Thread!!

 

[Milo]

Insofar I agree to greatllake5's comments that this thread is - as multiple ones before - one of those more or less "borderline" threads where it's worth to discuss if it really belongs into the IC forum.
The general question of Milo - do I have to follow the suggestions of: meds (oxybutynin), two possible treatment options consisting of botox injections every six months, or a surgical implant attached to the nerve connecting to the bladder or can't I simply manage my condition with wearing diapers - is in my eyes a valid question in IC forum, and in my eyes everyone is the master of his own body and is the only one (as far as mentally healthy) who decides which treatment is done and which one not. So, asking just this question, would have been in my eyes totally fine here in IC forum)
On the other hand telling that this is very appreciated, and a strong wish for being IC is behind this, is a no-go in IC forum and is far beyond of accepting one's condition which is usually and often discussed - and is against the rules stated in the forums header.

Especially if a poster states in his profile to be near everything (Adult Baby+Diaper Lover+Babyfur+Diaperfur+Little+Incontinent) one should be careful what and how to post in Incontinence Forum ...

That's fair. Although I was hoping for some people to say "yes, it is wrong to be happy with IC." When I first made the thread, I was very split between accepting and appreciating my situation, or wanting to get it fixed. My goal was not to create an echo chamber, but to let me vent a little, and try to figure out what I should do.

I am incontinent, but I did not realize there could be a stigma about me also being ABDL. I'll keep that in mind if I make any future posts.

And, this Thread has fallen into precisely where I had guessed that it would.
I remain with my original statement: "I am very hesitant to Post."
I had hoped that it would not, but this has evolved to near textbook 'Flaming'!!

I have heard enough and I am moving on! I am done with this Thread!!

I definitely could have replied in a more civil manner. I was heated after being called a liar, and should have kept my cool. I appreciate you taking the time to talk to me in the first place!


I did not want to cause anyone strife because of this post, and I apologize if I have offended anyone. I am grateful to everyone who has responded. So now, hopefully we can let this thread die and be forgotten.

 

[hbic60]

That's fair. Although I was hoping for some people to say "yes, it is wrong to be happy with IC." When I first made the thread, I was very split between accepting and appreciating my situation, or wanting to get it fixed. My goal was not to create an echo chamber, but to let me vent a little, and try to figure out what I should do.

I am incontinent, but I did not realize there could be a stigma about me also being ABDL. I'll keep that in mind if I make any future posts.

I can't imagine you will find anyone here among us saying "I'm happy being IC" - being IC is not a choice but a medical condition which you cannot switch off or say "give me a few weeks of rest from it". Most of us are, although being IC, more in a state saying "I'm OK with wearing diapers all the time", maximum some even saying "I like my diapers" (under the circumstance they allow me living a normal life).

I see no stigma against ABDL, most people (including me) are really absolutely tolerant to this (and other) lifestyles. But what many of us are fighting is to keep the IC forum "clean" from any fetish related posts, and often I have the impression that ABDL people always try to push the limit what is acceptable in IC forum permanently further and further and "intrude" this forum with their point of view, not realizing that being IC is totally different to a fetish point of view, even with the fact that we are also using diapers. As long as ABDL accept this every valuable post coming from there is of course OK, but please be aware that everything fetish related is noticed to be seen, especially something like "how is it to be IC", "How do I become IC", "You can be happy that you are IC" and so on...

 

[utefan]

I think you should have posted on another ADISC forum. This is for IC people who accept or simply want to discus IC issues. Your welcome here, I just wish you have focused more on "normal" IC issues. Not wanting to be diaper dependent.

Correct

 

[Oceansky2021]

I am never getting out of diapers I have Cri De chat and I am 36 and if you want to talk I am here I am fully incontinent

 

[Pampers4thisboi]

Maybe it's more about someone supporting you through this.

 

[ltaluv]

tl;dr I have some form of urinary incontinence. I am very happy that I am IC and want it to progress, but people around me constantly look for a fix on my behalf. I don't know if it is okay for me to be happy about being incontinent, and I just want to talk to some people.

TL;DR Wear diapers if you want to, and quit worrying what anyone thinks of it.

As I see it, you do have a problem, but it has nothing to do with wearing diapers or being incontinent, and everything to do with needing validation from those around you for doing the things you want.

If you rely on others to approve of what you do, you're unlikely to be happy with who you are. You're doing things that are against your own wishes (taking medication and researching other treatment options, for example) rather than simply doing the things you want to do.

Wearing diapers doesn't hurt anyone, as others have pointed out. Managing your incontinence in the way you want should be your own choice, yet you do things you do not want so that you can please your friends family, and doctor.

Likewise, you seek the validation of strangers seeing the effect of your diaper leaks to demonstrate to yourself that you must wear diapers, and you seek the validation of this group to prove to yourself that it's OK to want to wear them. When your family and friends suggest other management strategies to manage your incontinence, you feel invalidated by the fact that they don't accept your incontinence and diaper use, and you let this lack of validation cause self-doubt.

My suggestion is to work on understanding why you feel uncomfortable with your choices when you don't have the validation of others that they're really necessary. Do you feel like your choices are unimportant? Do you feel judged by others for your choices, and if so, why does others' judgemental affect you so much?

There's nothing wrong with doing things that make others happy, but when your whole life is about getting to make others happy at the expense of your own happiness, it's a problem.

 

[napy534]

I think you guys are being very unfair to OP. They're incontinent and their thoughts and feelings on the topic are just as valid as yours, they shouldn't have to go to another forum. Never thought we'd have IC elitists like this lol.

Edit: Wow, I hadn't even gotten to page 2 yet, some of you are being absolutely disgusting towards to Milo in my opinion.

 

[Edgewater]

I think you guys are being very unfair to OP. They're incontinent and their thoughts and feelings on the topic are just as valid as yours, they shouldn't have to go to another forum. Never thought we'd have IC elitists like this lol.

Edit: Wow, I hadn't even gotten to page 2 yet, some of you are being absolutely disgusting towards to Milo in my opinion.

One needs to always consider motivation of both parties. Sadly your kind heart can be used, especially in today's World. Every time, you answer your phone scammers must be a consideration. Not suggesting that here, but it can and does happen.

 

[babykeiff]

Hello! I have had a pit in my stomach for a while, and have felt guilty and conflicted about my emotions. I think getting the idea off of my chest, venting, and talking to others would be very beneficial to my mental state. It's going to be a long post with lots of background info, so,

tl;dr I have some form of urinary incontinence. I am very happy that I am IC and want it to progress, but people around me constantly look for a fix on my behalf. I don't know if it is okay for me to be happy about being incontinent, and I just want to talk to some people.

I have been an ABDL for a while, maybe since 2008 or even before, and have been obsessed with diapers. The smell, sound, and feeling bring me nothing but bliss, and I have always wanted to be in them permanently, while actively wishing to become incontinent. However, I did not want to go 24/7 because I did not want to explain to someone that I am wearing diapers because I want to, not because I need to. In January I got my wish.

I started having strong urges to pee in October, and they became stronger and more frequent over time. I had many very small leaks starting in January, but in mid-February I had a small stream travel through my underwear and down my leg. Since then, I have been wearing incontinence pads, pull-ups, and diapers every day, and could not be happier. I wanted incontinence, now I have it, and I often have a smile plastered on my face when I can't make it to the bathroom, and relish the fact that absorbent products are a necessity. I still have some control and do not need diapers all the time, but pads are required at home, and pull-ups or diapers if I am leaving the house for an extended period of time.

I went to a urologist to see if there were any major issues. I was put on oxybutynin, eventually took off of it, then the urologist ordered a number of tests including an x-ray of my lower spine, an ultrasound of my kidneys, and an MRI of my spine and brain. Thankfully, none of the tests showed that anything was seriously wrong or injured, but I was not given a diagnosis. I was told my symptoms match with neurogenic bladder, but my brain is fine so I was simply told that I have urinary incontinence. I really like knowing the why of things, not just the what, so the lack of diagnosis was frustrating because I did not need a doctor to tell me that I'm pissing my pants. I was told of two possible treatment options consisting of botox injections every six months, or a surgical implant attached to the nerve connecting to the bladder.

I have looked into and considered these options, but I feel like I did that just to conform to social norms, not because I actually want a fix. Honestly, I really don't want this to be "fixed," because my ideal is to have my incontinence progress. I have already experienced some of the consequences of wearing; I have told my mom and friends that I wear diapers, I have dealt with swamp-butt during the spring and summer, I have had very painful chafing on my foreskin, have had small but unnoticed leaks in public, and have had a few rather large, but still unnoticed, leaks in public. I wanted, and still do want, all of those things to happen. The thought of telling people and having leaks in public mentally solidifies that I need diapers. It is a little humiliating, but also very exciting and welcomed. Despite having those thoughts, I still feel a need to try to get "better."

I don't feel like those thoughts are actually my own, and that's where my emotional conflict comes from. I want to be incontinent, but everyone around me shows pity, or constantly looks for solutions. Try vitamin D, try drinking green tea, try these supplements, try neurofeedback, here are other medications that might help. I'm sick of hearing it, but I humor those people and try their fixes, not because I want to, but because I feel pressured to. I have already happily accepted that I have a form of incontinence, but there is a persistent doubt in the back of my mind.

I don't really know what to do or say. I just think I need to talk to people about it. Maybe seeking validation would be good, but I'm also open to ideas that I should strive for continence. I just want to talk to someone.

Directly, no. It is not wrong to want to enjoy life and all it throws at you, and bladder issues have been thrown at you - so why not enjoy it. In relation to 'a fix', since diaper dependance ( I prefer not to use the term incontinence as everybody has a different understanding and use of that term) is a symptom of other issues, and becomes permanant usually within a few weeks, it is never 'fixable' despite what old wives tales one might spout. As a result, it is something to be handled. This is what makes us stronger - the way we handle the little challenges in our lives. Medical staff firmly believe that their job is to fix things, where they forget about the paitents quality of life - i.e. an operation to cut this and that off cause it might cause complications and/or death - yet the operation has a higher mortality rate than if one leaves it alone... but doing nothing is not helping the paitent so we must do something.... a common dilema for medical people.

You can either handle the bladder leakage by attempting to get to a bathroom in soggy pants while tripping over every obstacle on the way as well as hurting yourself - OR - accept that you end up in soggy pants, and put a diaper on and deal with that in your own time. After all, a diaper is just functional underwear. It has many advantages, so why add stress to your life - life is to be enjoyed, so enjoy and revel in your diapers.

To those people who see you as 'broken' tell them that you are not. You, like everyone else in the world is different. None of us are the same - so why should you try to equate the person who tries to 'fix' you. You are not broken so you do not need fixing.

In relation to the diapers, should you become more dependant on them - that is up to your body, not me and not you. Your body will make the decision to enhance your happiness, and if that includes more of what is percieved as infantile i.e. bottles, pacifiers, plushies etc... that will occur. It is up to you to either enjoy the process and be happy from this day on, OR fight it and be miserable.

A baby is surprised each and every day, and giggles at the daylight and each experience. The baby is a lot smarter than most adults - it choses to be happy while most adults dismiss what they see and are miserable. Life is a choice - to enjoy or not - that is also your choice - to be happy or not.

 

[babykeiff]

To all the people posting here suggesting that Milo should have posted elsewhere -

What, in your opinion, qualifies one as incontinent - since you all seem to belive that Milo with bladder issues does not fit into your perspectives of being incontinent? Is that whole idea and concept of X and Y is required to be a member of Z group being biased and discriminatory? Is this forum not here to support all forms of diaper dependance even if it is dribbling into a diaper occasionally to full dependance? Milo has been dealing with this for a while, and he is asking for support. You are not obliged to support him, but at least, don't knock him!

 

[BabyHailey1977]

To all the people posting here suggesting that Milo should have posted elsewhere -

What, in your opinion, qualifies one as incontinent - since you all seem to belive that Milo with bladder issues does not fit into your perspectives of being incontinent? Is that whole idea and concept of X and Y is required to be a member of Z group being biased and discriminatory? Is this forum not here to support all forms of diaper dependance even if it is dribbling into a diaper occasionally to full dependance? Milo has been dealing with this for a while, and he is asking for support. You are not obliged to support him, but at least, don't knock him!

Exactly. It’s a joke.