Help!! Sneaking nappies!

[YankeeFox]

Oh, dear. I'd want to set some hard boundaries here.

"No taking dirty diapers out of bins" (the fact that they are other peoples' diapers, out of other peoples' bins, makes this much worse [to my mind, if I were in your position]) seems like a reasonable restriction to me whether it's in a relationship or in life in general. If he respects you at all, he'll agree not to involve you-- and I think, if he loves you, he'll agree to cut it out. If not, you may want to cut him out. Maybe quickly.

I am also going to hop on the "he's being manipulative when he says 'if you love me'" bandwagon.

 

[PearlPinkFloydJam]

Hi to all, I'm new here and I needed some advices from anyone who had experiences and how they handle the situation. First of all, I'm not an ab/dl but my bf is and I don't really have problem with that, I'm open minded and accepted that every person has different thing going on with them. As long as they are not harming anyone then whatever it is I'm ok with that. So, we've been together for a year but most of the time we're apart, living in different country. Few months in a relationship he admitted his fetish for diapers to me, at 1st I'm surprised and kinda disappointed, but eventually accepted it, reading about stories of people with same fetishes helped me to understand. So when we are together I wear nappies for him and he wants me peeing on it, he also wear nappies and peed on. I accepted the peeing stuff although at 1st it grossed me out. But I just keep on saying nuh uh dont be gross that's your own body fluids so its no big deal. So I get used to it though not fully comfortable. The nextime we are together he admitted that he get sexual urges when sneaking childrens used nappies ( only peed nappies, not with poop) and wearing it or just simply rubbing it on himself. When I learned about this, I worried that his fetish seems evolving, and we had a big argument when he asked me to sneak nappies for him coz im not going to be suspicious when I go to any children changing station, he told me that if I really love him or accepting him fully I should do that. I don't know what to do, I love him but I hate him when he's being like this. Sometimes I thought if isn't it enough that I accepted him but for him it feels like he wants me to have some full fetish on nappy also that way only I can prove I accepted him. But its not that easy, every person has their thing and im not diaper lover, I can be with him, wear nappies, pee on it, but to expect that I will get the same satisfaction he get is not going to happen. I don't know what to do? We are so perfect together and l love him. But whenever we discussed about sneaking used nappies, I dont think I could handle that.. I badly needed some advices folks. Anyone who experienced this. Pls share your thoughts.

First off, kudos to you for accepting his fetish and making a rational thought about it before passing judgment. It takes a strong person to do that.

You're already pushing past your comfort zone accepting the AB/DL side of him and peeing in the diapers. Now, it seems like he's trying to push you one step further by helping him collect used diapers from others. What he is asking you to do is not only dangerous but risky. You do not have to go through with this and commit this act to prove your loyalty to him. The people that we love will never try persuading us into committing risky behaviors only for a quick thrill. Therefore, you shouldn't listen to the whole, "If you love me, then you'll do this" line. So many women and men alike get pushed into bad situations in order to "prove their love" to the other person. You know that it isn't right and if he is a rational person, he knows it as well.

Don't let him get the best of you on this and stand your ground. If you give in, who knows what else he'll ask you to do when his fetish starts to "evolve." Tell him how you feel about it and that you'd love it if he didn't do this either. Tell him there are better things in life than digging around for used diapers. Let him know that you've already made significant progress in stepping out of your comfort zone for him by peeing in the diapers. What he is asking now is obviously something that isn't in your best interests and doesn't turn you on. If that is not enough for him and he is persistent about wanting you to collect used diapers, then maybe you need to look into dating someone else. If he loves and cares about you, he will understand.

Also, please do not just through with anything he says because "you're perfect together" and "you love him." This is the sign of an imperfection in your relationship and a bit of insight into his attitude. I've heard so many girls say this and suffer in relationships because they do not stand up for themselves. Relationships aren't about being selfless and letting the other person take advantage of you. You're a human being with interests, pleasures, and an agenda. If the other person can't realize that, then it is time to move on. If your relationship ends because you were not willing to get diapers out of the trash, then so be it. You can find another person who will be of higher quality and treat you better. Don't forget that.

Good luck with all of this.