Have I told you how much I hate bowel IC???

[Diaperman95]

Went to the doctors in the city today. 1:15 min drive each way. Took my supplies and stuff as always. Out side the normal few bladder urges I had my stomach never turned over once or nothing. I get back in my home town and run by the small mom and pop pharmacy I use. I am standing in line I feel my stomach turn then a slight urge I squeeze down and it does nothing, a good deal of semi soft poop exits into the diaper. So of course there are about 7 people in the small 20 x20 lobby and they just kind of backed up from me. no one said nothing but I sure had a few eyes on me. I am about to walk back out and send the wife in and the call my name. So I walk back over and quickley pay for my meds and leave. I am about a min from home and another little bit just pushes out no real urge or nothing. By now it is getting very soft and when it is liquid goo I have no control and no feeling other than feeling it get warm in my diaper. So I get home and make a mad dash to the house and at the front door standing with the keys in my hand out it comes. I hardly even feel it in my diaper. Somehow my diaper had shifted sow the leak guard was in the middle of my crack. So everything left of the guard went down my left leg. All down the hall it just keeps coming. Buy the time I am in the restroom it is on my sock and puddling in my shoe. I am so glad the worst of it happened at home. But man I go in this pharmacy 2 o 3 times a week. I know they had to spray air freshener because it was bad. It made me want to puke. I had not shit since friday and had taken miralax and my linzess last night. I was in the hospital over the weekend and for what ever reason they held my linzess and it is what really keeps me from stopping up. Even on the max 290mg dose of it I normally have to take some mirlax. But I was so bloated and my gastroparesis was making me sick from being stopped up. So a least my stomach feels better. But I hate having the shits in public and know everyone in there new it was me.

To all people that think incontinence sounds fun I say... grow up! Just enjoy what you like when you like it. Because incontinence does not care where you are whom you are around and how full your diaper is. Even with it running down your leg on a diaper blow out , If the colon is not done it is going to keep dumping. Does anyone really think this sounds fun? Do not try to become incontinent.

 

[slimjiminy]

My full sympathies!

 

[jdinvirginia]

Diaperman, I so feel for you. I had a horrible diarrhea blowout yesterday while I was wearing just a pull-up (as a bridge the gap diaper). Fortunately I had plastic pants on. Regardless, the "stuff" went everywhere. Unlike you, I was in my own bathroom.

 

[HalMidLife]

To the OP: I truly feel bad for anyone who has to live with bowel IC. I have, at worst, a moderate urinary IC. For sure, sometimes it’s annoying and there are times that I despise wearing protection (Monday was such a day), but for whatever it’s worth, I realize it’s nothing compared with what some folks are living with. Just because we wear the same protective products sure doesn’t mean we’re dealing with the same issue - at all.

I sincerely feel bad for what you just went through…

Edit to say, I’m not judging anyone’s reason for wearing diapers, because I’ve come to <most times> like how they feel to wear, to the point where I put “DL” in my profile…but…for anyone who actually longs to be IC and is otherwise healthy…be careful what you wish for. There are no days off.

 

[PaddedPonyboy]

i am so sorry, diaperman, that is such an awful ordeal to go through, especially after such a long trip to and from your doctor's. having moments like that in public is so humiliating, i'm glad nobody said anything but that doesn't take away how awful that must've felt. you're a very strong man, you're dealing with something that most people can't even begin to comprehend.

it's good to let others know the reality of this condition, though. i wish you or anyone else didn't have to go through this, but people tend to be really misguided when it comes to disabilities- i can't relate to your bowel incontinence, but as an example, i suffer from chronic fatigue and pain due to my fibromyalgia, and i am constantly so exhausted that I can barely move. i get so tired most days that the simple act of sitting upright drains too much energy and i have to conduct most of my living laying down in bed or on a couch, or sleeping. i hear people say things like "i wish i could sit at home all day, it sounds like a vacation!" and it makes me feel very bad because I am downright miserable when I feel like this, i often have pounding headaches or aches in my back or joints that make it impossible for me to relax even though i'm laying down. people have very skewed ideas of what disabilities are like to actually live with- there's no fun in being diapered for you, it's just your reality.

i hope that doesn't happen to you again, and that things go a bit more smoothly from here on out. fingers crossed for you, diaperman

 

[LaLoneDigi]

Sounds like a rough day. Sorry you have to go through things like this. Most people are pretty understanding, but it's still not fun.

 

[Diaperman95]

i am so sorry, diaperman, that is such an awful ordeal to go through, especially after such a long trip to and from your doctor's. having moments like that in public is so humiliating, i'm glad nobody said anything but that doesn't take away how awful that must've felt. you're a very strong man, you're dealing with something that most people can't even begin to comprehend.

it's good to let others know the reality of this condition, though. i wish you or anyone else didn't have to go through this, but people tend to be really misguided when it comes to disabilities- i can't relate to your bowel incontinence, but as an example, i suffer from chronic fatigue and pain due to my fibromyalgia, and i am constantly so exhausted that I can barely move. i get so tired most days that the simple act of sitting upright drains too much energy and i have to conduct most of my living laying down in bed or on a couch, or sleeping. i hear people say things like "i wish i could sit at home all day, it sounds like a vacation!" and it makes me feel very bad because I am downright miserable when I feel like this, i often have pounding headaches or aches in my back or joints that make it impossible for me to relax even though i'm laying down. people have very skewed ideas of what disabilities aie like to actually live with- there's no fun in being diapered for you, it's just your reality.

i hope that doesn't happen to you again, and that things go a bit more smoothly from here on out. fingers crossed for you, diaperman

Yeah I have lots of joint issues and nerve issues and the fatigue is indescribable. I just wish the doctors could feel what I feel. Maybe they would be a bit more understanding.

 

[BigAl2]

It sucks. Im having more bowel accidents lately.

 

[PaddedPonyboy]

Yeah I have lots of joint issues and nerve issues and the fatigue is indescribable. I just wish the doctors could feel what I feel. Maybe they would be a bit more understanding.

i'm so sorry you deal with joint and nerve issues too, it's such a nightmare. so you definitely get the fatigue, you know how crappy it is to not be able to do a darn thing and people are treating you like you're lazy... YOU SAID IT!!! that's how i feel too, i wish they could experience what we're actually going through. doctors never consult patients or take their experiences into consideration when talking to other patients with the same problem, they just talk about what they know and what they read from books and learned in lectures. it's a totally different ballpark knowing what something is like and experiencing it for yourself. i hope that you are able to be treated with more respect and dignity in the future, you're going through hell, you're really powerful though. my fingers are crossed for you, you deserve better treatment

 

[Zeke]

I believe that you may have mentioned it once or twice, D-man!

 

[Diaperman95]

It sucks. Im having more bowel accidents lately.

It helps to hear others in the same boat share. Thank you. You stay strong!

 

[Diaperman95]

i'm so sorry you deal with joint and nerve issues too, it's such a nightmare. so you definitely get the fatigue, you know how crappy it is to not be able to do a darn thing and people are treating you like you're lazy... YOU SAID IT!!! that's how i feel too, i wish they could experience what we're actually going through. doctors never consult patients or take their experiences into consideration when talking to other patients with the same problem, they just t lk about what they know and what they read from books and learned in lectures. it's a totally different ballpark knowing what something is like experiencing it for yourself. i hope that you are able to be treated with more respect and dignity in the future, you're going through hell, you're really powerful though. my fingers are crossed for you, you deserve better treatment

I have a appointment may 3rd with OU Medical Neurology to try and figure something out. The hope is they will send me to the other specialist like rheumatology that I need also. I have a rheumo doc and he is a swell guy but even with all the symptoms I have, and all the 100 plus hospital stays over the last 30 years. He wants a positive ANA market before he will treat, but I do not have it. But he tells me 30% of people with autoimmune disorders do not show ANA positive... But.. Then that He cant give me any meds to settle my body down as he is not sure what I am having. But he 1000% believes my symptoms and that it is a autoimmune thing. He tends to think it is more my nerve system, but it is also my connective tissues d joints. I feel like the tinman without oil. But he is the one that found the AV necrosis in my hips. So each year these fuckers just watch as I get worse and worse. I think My vegus nerve is eaten up . That's why the gastroparesis and BP and my central apnea is coming from and possible my Fecal IC too. Look up what the vegus nerve controls! It will Shock you. My central apnea happens when a wake even and my O2 will drop in the low but these docs don't seam too worried. Every time I am in the ER and relax good but not even a sleep I set off the low O2 and they put my on Oxygen when in the hospital but the stupid sleep doctor and heart doctor won't do it at home. They check it in office when I am upmoving around and it will be 92% most days. Not low enough. I tell them I check it at home when I feel messed up like right now ATM All my muscles are burning, it feels like I fane 5 miles and lifted weights. My O2 is 86% and my BP is 88\51. But it gets lower than that. It is that vegus nerve. I think a lot of my fatigue and memory fog are caused by not enough oxygen due to my apnea and BP being low. I am ok when moving around and active but when I relax I drop. My last sleep study it got as low as 54%. That was on Cpap. I finally got a ASV last week and it dropped my apnea a lot, like a lot! But I only use it for sleep. Anyhow I have not even scraped the surface of my issues.
I will have to PM you and spare everyone else. Lol You are welcome to PM me anytime. I can so relate to you issues!! We need to chat one day. But I am fixing to go to bed.

No poop today.... So that is a good day. We will see how morning goes.

I want to thank everyone that commented their sympathy or reacted. It feels great to know others understand somewhere!

 

[Zeke]

It helps to hear others in the same boat share. Thank you. You stay strong!

There’s truth in that old saying “misery loves company”? I think it’s more like when you see others going through what you are it puts you in that “if they did it so can I” frame of mind.

 

[Hemix]

There's a rule about the topic for a reason, there's nothing fun on having a solid waste flowing anywhere, anytime, and feeling sick because of the problems causing it, and if it happens, abdominal pains are one of the worst imho.

 

[Zeke]

Went to the doctors in the city today. 1:15 min drive each way. Took my supplies and stuff as always. Out side the normal few bladder urges I had my stomach never turned over once or nothing. I get back in my home town and run by the small mom and pop pharmacy I use. I am standing in line I feel my stomach turn then a slight urge I squeeze down and it does nothing, a good deal of semi soft poop exits into the diaper. So of course there are about 7 people in the small 20 x20 lobby and they just kind of backed up from me. no one said nothing but I sure had a few eyes on me. I am about to walk back out and send the wife in and the call my name. So I walk back over and quickley pay for my meds and leave. I am about a min from home and another little bit just pushes out no real urge or nothing. By now it is getting very soft and when it is liquid goo I have no control and no feeling other than feeling it get warm in my diaper. So I get home and make a mad dash to the house and at the front door standing with the keys in my hand out it comes. I hardly even feel it in my diaper. Somehow my diaper had shifted sow the leak guard was in the middle of my crack. So everything left of the guard went down my left leg. All down the hall it just keeps coming. Buy the time I am in the restroom it is on my sock and puddling in my shoe. I am so glad the worst of it happened at home. But man I go in this pharmacy 2 o 3 times a week. I know they had to spray air freshener because it was bad. It made me want to puke. I had not shit since friday and had taken miralax and my linzess last night. I was in the hospital over the weekend and for what ever reason they held my linzess and it is what really keeps me from stopping up. Even on the max 290mg dose of it I normally have to take some mirlax. But I was so bloated and my gastroparesis was making me sick from being stopped up. So a least my stomach feels better. But I hate having the shits in public and know everyone in there new it was me.

To all people that think incontinence sounds fun I say... grow up! Just enjoy what you like when you like it. Because incontinence does not care where you are whom you are around and how full your diaper is. Even with it running down your leg on a diaper blow out , If the colon is not done it is going to keep dumping. Does anyone really think this sounds fun? Do not try to become incontinent.

It’s amazing how much poop can exist in the large intestine and colon. If you do go for a couple of days, without going, it can get very full and give its owner quite a shock on the occasion you find out how much it holds when in a public place, especially a public place where they know you. It sounds like you weren’t using the “belt and suspenders” approach to containment using a pair of plastic pants over your disposable for catching those evacuations that swing for the leak guards and exceed them. I shared a photo of a blowout that I had with similar consistency mess that showed how valiantly my plastic pants had battled to contain this overloading of my cloth prefold, soaker, and liner, but my polymer protectors saved me. As for your meds you’ve got a lot more going on there than I do and I’m thankful that they’re available for you and thankful that I don’t have to take them. It baffles me how with all the medical maladies that you have that you can still bowl as well as you do. Have you ever had one of these blowout experiences while bowling D-Man?

 

[Lethdale]

Went to the doctors in the city today. 1:15 min drive each way. Took my supplies and stuff as always. Out side the normal few bladder urges I had my stomach never turned over once or nothing. I get back in my home town and run by the small mom and pop pharmacy I use. I am standing in line I feel my stomach turn then a slight urge I squeeze down and it does nothing, a good deal of semi soft poop exits into the diaper. So of course there are about 7 people in the small 20 x20 lobby and they just kind of backed up from me. no one said nothing but I sure had a few eyes on me. I am about to walk back out and send the wife in and the call my name. So I walk back over and quickley pay for my meds and leave. I am about a min from home and another little bit just pushes out no real urge or nothing. By now it is getting very soft and when it is liquid goo I have no control and no feeling other than feeling it get warm in my diaper. So I get home and make a mad dash to the house and at the front door standing with the keys in my hand out it comes. I hardly even feel it in my diaper. Somehow my diaper had shifted sow the leak guard was in the middle of my crack. So everything left of the guard went down my left leg. All down the hall it just keeps coming. Buy the time I am in the restroom it is on my sock and puddling in my shoe. I am so glad the worst of it happened at home. But man I go in this pharmacy 2 o 3 times a week. I know they had to spray air freshener because it was bad. It made me want to puke. I had not shit since friday and had taken miralax and my linzess last night. I was in the hospital over the weekend and for what ever reason they held my linzess and it is what really keeps me from stopping up. Even on the max 290mg dose of it I normally have to take some mirlax. But I was so bloated and my gastroparesis was making me sick from being stopped up. So a least my stomach feels better. But I hate having the shits in public and know everyone in there new it was me.

To all people that think incontinence sounds fun I say... grow up! Just enjoy what you like when you like it. Because incontinence does not care where you are whom you are around and how full your diaper is. Even with it running down your leg on a diaper blow out , If the colon is not done it is going to keep dumping. Does anyone really think this sounds fun? Do not try to become incontinent.

I'm so sorry to hear this. I can't imagine what you have to deal with.

 

[PaddedPonyboy]

I have a appointment may 3rd with OU Medical Neurology to try and figure something out. The hope is they will send me to the other specialist like rheumatology that I need also. I have a rheumo doc and he is a swell guy but even with all the symptoms I have, and all the 100 plus hospital stays over the last 30 years. He wants a positive ANA market before he will treat, but I do not have it. But he tells me 30% of people with autoimmune disorders do not show ANA positive... But.. Then that He cant give me any meds to settle my body down as he is not sure what I am having. But he 1000% believes my symptoms and that it is a autoimmune thing. He tends to think it is more my nerve system, but it is also my connective tissues d joints. I feel like the tinman without oil. But he is the one that found the AV necrosis in my hips. So each year these fuckers just watch as I get worse and worse. I think My vegus nerve is eaten up . That's why the gastroparesis and BP and my central apnea is coming from and possible my Fecal IC too. Look up what the vegus nerve controls! It will Shock you. My central apnea happens when a wake even and my O2 will drop in the low but these docs don't seam too worried. Every time I am in the ER and relax good but not even a sleep I set off the low O2 and they put my on Oxygen when in the hospital but the stupid sleep doctor and heart doctor won't do it at home. They check it in office when I am upmoving around and it will be 92% most days. Not low enough. I tell them I check it at home when I feel messed up like right now ATM All my muscles are burning, it feels like I fane 5 miles and lifted weights. My O2 is 86% and my BP is 88\51. But it gets lower than that. It is that vegus nerve. I think a lot of my fatigue and memory fog are caused by not enough oxygen due to my apnea and BP being low. I am ok when moving around and active but when I relax I drop. My last sleep study it got as low as 54%. That was on Cpap. I finally got a ASV last week and it dropped my apnea a lot, like a lot! But I only use it for sleep. Anyhow I have not even scraped the surface of my issues.
I will have to PM you and spare everyone else. Lol You are welcome to PM me anytime. I can so relate to you issues!! We need to chat one day. But I am fixing to go to bed.

No poop today.... So that is a good day. We will see how morning goes.

I want to thank everyone that commented their sympathy or reacted. It feels great to know others understand somewhere!

i do not understand your doctor's logic at all there... if he's acknowledging that a good 30% of people with autoimmune disorders do not show ANA positive, which is a SIGNIFICANT chunk of people! AND is acknowledging your symptoms and is refusing to acknowledge that that could be you... i think that's a dead giveaway that this man is more concerned about his ego and being right than taking care of your needs. the thing that's always driven me crazy about most doctors is it's always about their egos. they just have to be right and will double down to the point of refusing to give patients what they need all for the sake of protecting their feelings from getting hurt if they're wrong. it's insane, their feelings really shouldn't matter when it comes to helping someone who is in agonizing pain or in a serious situation where they don't get enough oxygen! when they're sleeping/resting!!!!! you're dealing with something serious and with your oxygen that CAN show up on those machines for them to plainly see and yet they're just letting it slide. i don't get the lack of urgency when it comes to medical care, i know it's just a job to these people but they don't seem to realize that we live with these conditions 24/7, the symptoms aren't just happening when we're in their office or the hospital, this is happening to us around the clock!

oh goodness, yeah, my therapist started telling me about what the vagus nerve controls last therapy session and i was blown away! i had no idea it was connected to so many different parts of your body, i honestly think mine may be damaged too- i had a stomach ulcer in 2017 and ever since then my GI health has been rapidly deteriorating. when i was in the hospital last time for an endoscopy, they noted that i had undigested food in my stomach still, even though i had fasted properly and not eaten for 12 hours... and then never called me back or offered to do any type of study for it. i had to come home and ask other people with GI issues online about what that could be and a lot of people said it very well could be gastroparesis, which is something i've been wondering if i've had for years now. i'm going to call them back and ask for a gastric emptying study but i'm just so mad that they told me they saw it on the scope and then decided it wasn't worth their time to pursue any further!!!!! this is my life i have to eat all day long! i can barely eat whenever i eat even small meals i become so nauseated i have to eat very slowly or stop entirely.

of course, you are welcome to PM me at any time, i'm glad to find another person on here that relates to a lot of my issues! even if i can't relate to having bowel-IC i do have urinary-IC and it's great that you understand a lot of the other things i'm going through! i will probably end up shooting you a message at some point with questions about gastroparesis! thanks again for being on this site diaperman! you're really insightful and informative! i always love your posts!

 

[greatlake5]

Does anyone really think this sounds fun?

I'm sure there are ABDL members enjoy a messy diaper. But I'm sure they haven't had a diarrhea blowout. I can't even imagine what that feels like.
I haven't had one for years. I did have one a few months back but it wasn't a blowout and it was managed. It's hard enough to be F-IC even if the consistency is solid. I try my best to accept my condition. Most of the time I do. But every once in a while it get's to me. Sorry dude. Keep strong.

 

[Diaperman95]

i do not understand your doctor's logic at all there... if he's acknowledging that a good 30% of people with autoimmune disorders do not show ANA positive, which is a SIGNIFICANT chunk of people! AND is acknowledging your symptoms and is refusing to acknowledge that that could be you... i think that's a dead giveaway that this man is more concerned about his ego and being right than taking care of your needs. the thing that's always driven me crazy about most doctors is it's always about their egos. they just have to be right and will double down to the point of refusing to give patients what they need all for the sake of protecting their feelings from getting hurt if they're wrong. it's insane, their feelings really shouldn't matter when it comes to helping someone who is in agonizing pain or in a serious situation where they don't get enough oxygen! when they're sleeping/resting!!!!! you're dealing with something serious and with your oxygen that CAN show up on those machines for them to plainly see and yet they're just letting it slide. i don't get the lack of urgency when it comes to medical care, i know it's just a job to these people but they don't seem to realize that we live with these conditions 24/7, the symptoms aren't just happening when we're in their office or the hospital, this is happening to us around the clock!

oh goodness, yeah, my therapist started telling me about what the vagus nerve controls last therapy session and i was blown away! i had no idea it was connected to so many different parts of your body, i honestly think mine may be damaged too- i had a stomach ulcer in 2017 and ever since then my GI health has been rapidly deteriorating. when i was in the hospital last time for an endoscopy, they noted that i had undigested food in my stomach still, even though i had fasted properly and not eaten for 12 hours... and then never called me back or offered to do any type of study for it. i had to come home and ask other people with GI issues online about what that could be and a lot of people said it very well could be gastroparesis, which is something i've been wondering if i've had for years now. i'm going to call them back and ask for a gastric emptying study but i'm just so mad that they told me they saw it on the scope and then decided it wasn't worth their time to pursue any further!!!!! this is my life i have to eat all day long! i can barely eat whenever i eat even small meals i become so nauseated i have to eat very slowly or stop entirely.

of course, you are welcome to PM me at any time, i'm glad to find another person on here that relates to a lot of my issues! even if i can't relate to having bowel-IC i do have urinary-IC and it's great that you understand a lot of the other things i'm going through! i will probably end up shooting you a message at some point with questions about gastroparesis! thanks again for being on this site diaperman! you're really insightful and informative! i always love your posts!

That is how my gastroparesis was found. I was scoped at 2 in the afternoon nothing to eat or drink after midnight and it was in-fact 8pm the night before and I had a grilled chicken sandwich with olives and he shown my the pics. My stomach did not have a little left over it was full. It should only take 4 hours for food to move through. so the did a gastric empty study but it was a few weeks later and my stomach was not in flare and it emptied, but thankfully my GI new it was because my gastroparesis was not flaring. so he repeated the test a month later when sick again and I failed it big time. I have had 3 or 4 of those studies over the years and they all come back positive but the one.. So on my last gastric empty study after 4 hours later not only was the eggs and tracer in my stomach still but some was still in my esophagus. So for sure follow up on that. Try to do it when in a flare and If you are not in a flare & it shows negative and everything good don't put a lot of faith in it and try to have it redone. Are you a diabetic. Most people that get gastroparesis are. I am not and like everything else it is idiopathic... Meaning they have no clue why. But I went for years with very low B12 and it will damage nerves fast. I have pernicious anemia meaning my body does not make the chemical that binds to B12 so it can be absorbed from my food. So any and all B12 goes straight through me unless I take injections. It really causes memory fog and a lot more because it is what makes up the protection to the lining of your nerves. PM me if you want to know anything about gastroparesis. At this point I know more about it than most all family doctors. It is pretty rare. I will also tell you from experience weed makes it way way worse. It is a double edge sword because it helps the nausea but it slows the stomach and makes you hungry. For 2 years I had a doctor tell me it was the best thing for my nausea. Before getting my gastroparesis I had never even tried it, but I was a smoking gummy taking fool for a couple years and they was the worst years of my life as far as gastroparesis goes. Doctors are starting to realize this now. My gastric pace maker saved my life. I was fixing to spend the rest of my life with a feeding tube. Because my doctor did not want me to get a stimulator. It was the best decision I ever made. Not a day went by for about 4 years that I thought about seriously putting my pistol under my chin. I was that sick. My family was all that kept me from doing it. So if anyone has this diseases a little or a lot and wants to talk I am a open book and I have lived through the pure hell of constant GP attacks. There is hope!

I wish you the best and get that test done it is easy and painless. But try to do it when you are bloated and not feeling well. For me in the first year it was about 50% of the time, 5 years later it was everyday.

 

[Diaperman95]

It’s amazing how much poop can exist in the large intestine and colon. If you do go for a couple of days, without going, it can get very full and give its owner quite a shock on the occasion you find out how much it holds when in a public place, especially a public place where they know you. It sounds like you weren’t using the “belt and suspenders” approach to containment using a pair of plastic pants over your disposable for catching those evacuations that swing for the leak guards and exceed them. I shared a photo of a blowout that I had with similar consistency mess that showed how valiantly my plastic pants had battled to contain this overloading of my cloth prefold, soaker, and liner, but my polymer protectors saved me. As for your meds you’ve got a lot more going on there than I do and I’m thankful that they’re available for you and thankful that I don’t have to take them. It baffles me how with all the medical maladies that you have that you can still bowl as well as you do. Have you ever had one of these blowout experiences while bowling D-Man?

Thank God no. I had one time I was up to bowl and my stomach turned I threw my ball it struck (thank God) and I ran the private bathroom. Thank God it was empty. I just got my diaper down in time and I blew shit all over the back of the seat as I was sitting down. But some how kept it off my clothes. Thank God for the strike because no way I would of made the spare without shit in my diaper. There was one other time I finished up and put my equipment up and was just visiting afterwards and it hit me. I told the wife I am heading to the car I am not going to make the restroom. As I walked across the lobby to the front doors it was just coming out. But it was not total liquid it was more like soft serve ice-cream thickness. It stunk but no one was next to the door and I made it to the car. But so far.. no I have not been embarrassed at the bowling alley yet. I almost crapped myself in physical therapy today though but I again made it just in time. Same thing pooping as pants came down. But it would not been as bad because the therapist knows I wear diapers and why. Normally the days I bowl I do not eat all day until I am done or on the last game. That and I never take laxatives the day before or the day of until I get home. My poop is not always liquid, I do still get stopped up from time to time and I do still have a hard time holding even when it is even firm. I have had countless firm stool IC as well. The difference is when firm the urge gets stronger and stronger until I just cant hold but I get a bit more warning, when soft I get the slightest urge then with in seconds to a few minutes I just feel it come out and I can not squeeze it off or anything. I have zero say in it. most the time I have numbness around my front edge of my anus to my balls. I have a few plastic pants but they are not very good. I think I am going to invest in some good pulpants if you know of any good ones. I want to try those Black protect briefs but they are $80 each