Dear AB/DL Lurkers - Here is what we want you to know

[huggiesthick]

We have but one goal with this thread, to share collective tips and support for those thinking of joining this community.

I’ll start, I had not joined ADISC for many years. Since shortly after it went public. Now that I’ve joined, only about a week ago, I have to say that I’m extremely impressed with the welcoming respect, caring, and sharing I’m experiencing. It’s also very obvious that my privacy is maintained and I need not fear being exposed. There are many settings that you can make to ensure this.

Since I’ve joined here are a few things I’ve learned from this fine community that I am now a part of:

1. There are typically double the visitors as members online at any point. That’s a lot of visitors. We all need to here from, learn from, and support each other. We all want to feel like we’re connected in some way. While I received good information in my many years of lurking, only since I’ve joined have I felt like I can contribute and maybe help a few other folks accept themselves or offer advice that might really help someone on their journey. It’s very cool and we treat each other very well.
2. I learned about a book that came out this year written by Rhonda Lipscomb, PhD., called You’re Not Broken - Strong Self Worth for AB/DLs. I just received the softcover book today from Amazon and I’m actively reading it. I am blown away by what I’m reading and learning. Please get this book, join ADISC, and let’s talk about it. We need to hear your thoughts and we need your input!
3. You’re not alone. In Libscomb’s book Chapter 1 I read that it is estimated that perhaps, “…we have over 330,000 AB/DL individuals in the United States and millions worldwide.”. Please join ADISC so we can connect and expand our network and be able to share with each other on an even wider scale.

 

[huggiesthick]

We have but one goal with this thread, to share collective tips and support for those thinking of joining this community.

I’ll start, I had not joined ADISC for many years. Since shortly after it went public. Now that I’ve joined, only about a week ago, I have to say that I’m extremely impressed with the welcoming respect, caring, and sharing I’m experiencing. It’s also very obvious that my privacy is maintained and I need not fear being exposed. There are many settings that you can make to ensure this.

Since I’ve joined here are a few things I’ve learned from this fine community that I am now a part of:

1. There are typically double the visitors as members online at any point. That’s a lot of visitors. We all need to here from, learn from, and support each other. We all want to feel like we’re connected in some way. While I received good information in my many years of lurking, only since I’ve joined have I felt like I can contribute and maybe help a few other folks accept themselves or offer advice that might really help someone on their journey. It’s very cool and we treat each other very well.
2. I learned about a book that came out this year written by Rhonda Lipscomb, PhD., called You’re Not Broken - Strong Self Worth for AB/DLs. I just received the softcover book today from Amazon and I’m actively reading it. I am blown away by what I’m reading and learning. Please get this book, join ADISC, and let’s talk about it. We need to hear your thoughts and we need your input!
3. You’re not alone. In Libscomb’s book Chapter 1 I read that it is estimated that perhaps, “…we have over 330,000 AB/DL individuals in the United States and millions worldwide.”. Please join ADISC so we can connect and expand our network and be able to share with each other on an even wider scale.

You're Not Broken: Dr. Rhoda's Guide to Strong Self Worth for AB/DLs https://a.co/d/fqNmJYc

 

[Traveller]

Yep, just finished the book, and even though we (me, wife) are totally fine and fully interactive, we have still managed to learn a LOT from it.
To you lurkers - jump in, the waters fine!
Remember, we are all the same, just somewhere different on the ABDL spectrum, and as Dr R puts it - unique in a good way

 

[SnowCat51]

To the lurkers: I just joined two days after browsing this site a few times over the years and it's great! Everyone is really nice, and there's a cool Discord server, too. There's lots to learn if you're still learning, and lots to contribute no matter what!

As a side note: I just bought the book on your suggestion, huggiesthick. Looking forward to reading it!

 

[huggiesthick]

Can we get a little more love thrown in here and impart your hard earned wisdom to visitors who are thinking of joining, please?

 

[Traveller]

Can we get a little more love thrown in here and impart your hard earned wisdom to visitors who are thinking of joining, please?

Yes, please use the search function, there is a HUGE WEALTH of information already in store and I almost guarantee that you'll find an answer to your questions without the fear of having to post a thread.
Once you have the courage to post just DO IT

 

[DeadUser]

Definitely got rid of a lot of feelings of alienation by joining this community, and interacting with the platform rather than just pretending I understood how it was.

Cross the threshold, lurkers. You won't regret it.

-a former lurker

 

[aroninanappy]

Does anyone know a place other than amazon or google to buy a pdf copy of this?
Although I'm not a lurker I have wanted to read this, also I'm pretty sure some lurkers would want to buy this from some where it won't appear on their usual accounts

 

[Ceary]

This is the best support and forum I have seen. I have come and gone during the years but I'm thankful for a safe and caring informative place. Thanks for the book suggestion. I'm going to get it now.

 

[OhioGuy]

Does anyone know a place other than amazon or google to buy a pdf copy of this?
Although I'm not a lurker I have wanted to read this, also I'm pretty sure some lurkers would want to buy this from some where it won't appear on their usual accounts

I ordered mine from Thriftbooks. I definitely didn’t want it on the Amazon account. Unfortunately I haven’t read it yet, but I’m looking so forward to it.

 

[LaLoneDigi]

The last few months I keep hearing about this book. I think I might buy a copy after Christmas!

 

[diaperedwife4life]

Got my copy this morning, hope it helps in my current situation

 

[dpcare]

I'm not a lurker and I'm not abdl

 

[Placentapede]

I'm a former lurker but also not as active given my ADHD with pretty much anything lol

 

[PeterPPeevy]

We have but one goal with this thread, to share collective tips and support for those thinking of joining this community....
2. I learned about a book that came out this year written by Rhonda Lipscomb, PhD., called You’re Not Broken - Strong Self Worth for AB/DLs. I just received the softcover book today from Amazon and I’m actively reading it. I am blown away by what I’m reading and learning. Please get this book, join ADISC, and let’s talk about it. We need to hear your thoughts and we need your input!

Thank you for this! I purchased the ebook version of You're Not Broken yesterday. The intro and the first two chapters have already proved to be invaluable, and have shown me how I really am a part of the AB/DL community, although definitely not AB and DL in that I wear and use Poise pull-ups, rather than diapers, often with an Always incontinence pad for added "protection" (using a razor blade, I cut several slits in the bottom the pad before attaching it to the gusset of the pull-ups. I do tend to waddle when that combo is saturated. Anyway...

I am slowly dropping some of my life-long inhibitions about my "DLness." Just this morning, because of You're Not Broken, I left a pee pad in my favourite chair after I finished checking my email and reading a bit more in the book. It wasn't wet, only because my pull-up/pad combo was doing its job. My wife has long known about my fetishes, and I'm tired of pretending that I'm not engaging in them when I actually pee my pants/panties/pants and/or pull-ups nearly ever day, sometimes two or three times a day. And sometimes poop in them too, although I generally reserve that time for when my wife is away shopping or working.

 

[PeterPPeevy]

Another book recommendation: The Other Side of Desire: Four Journeys into the Far Realms of Lust and Longing, by New Yorker Magazine contributor Daniel Bergner. The Amazon blurb: "…Daniel Bergner’s The Other Side of Desire is a literary exploration of science and sex that will appeal to readers of Mary Roach and Natalie Angier. A cross between 'a top-rated HBO series [with] provocatively graphic sex, humorous dialogue, and moral ambiguity,'(New York Times) and a profound, deeply humanizing study of sexuality, The Other Side of Desire has been called, 'a foray into extreme passion, in quest of the human soul' (O, The Oprah Magazine) and its author, Bergner, 'a keen storyteller but above all a humane one' (Salon.com)."

This moving, informative book should be a must-read for anyone struggling with fetishes and with the belief sthat they should be more in control of them, and that they are at the nadir of the human condition. A case in point: One of Berner's four fetishists becomes aroused by feet, and not just the feet of other people. He's sexually aroused, for example, by weather reports that forecast a foot of snow, and resorts, if I recall correctly, chemical castration as a result of bad medical advice.

 

[FrannyAnne]

Does anyone know a place other than amazon or google to buy a pdf copy of this?
Although I'm not a lurker I have wanted to read this, also I'm pretty sure some lurkers would want to buy this from some where it won't appear on their usual accounts

I'm speaking only from experience of the UK: It's possible to buy an Amazon gift card and have your purchase sent to an Amazon locker. This way nothing is recorded and your purchase is anonymous. I use this method for clothes too, as well as plastic pants.

 

[BunnyPrincess]

As a former lurker since 2018 to this April on and off, it isn't always because of shame. Some lurkers are minors and have to wait until they are 18 to join. I know I wanted to join back in 2018 and was a bit disappointed, although understanding of the reason why, when I saw that you have to be 18 to join. Saying this now as I only just now noticed this as a sticky post lol

 

[BabyBoy2023]

We have but one goal with this thread, to share collective tips and support for those thinking of joining this community.

I’ll start, I had not joined ADISC for many years. Since shortly after it went public. Now that I’ve joined, only about a week ago, I have to say that I’m extremely impressed with the welcoming respect, caring, and sharing I’m experiencing. It’s also very obvious that my privacy is maintained and I need not fear being exposed. There are many settings that you can make to ensure this.

Since I’ve joined here are a few things I’ve learned from this fine community that I am now a part of:

1. There are typically double the visitors as members online at any point. That’s a lot of visitors. We all need to here from, learn from, and support each other. We all want to feel like we’re connected in some way. While I received good information in my many years of lurking, only since I’ve joined have I felt like I can contribute and maybe help a few other folks accept themselves or offer advice that might really help someone on their journey. It’s very cool and we treat each other very well.
2. I learned about a book that came out this year written by Rhonda Lipscomb, PhD., called You’re Not Broken - Strong Self Worth for AB/DLs. I just received the softcover book today from Amazon and I’m actively reading it. I am blown away by what I’m reading and learning. Please get this book, join ADISC, and let’s talk about it. We need to hear your thoughts and we need your input!
3. You’re not alone. In Libscomb’s book Chapter 1 I read that it is estimated that perhaps, “…we have over 330,000 AB/DL individuals in the United States and millions worldwide.”. Please join ADISC so we can connect and expand our network and be able to share with each other on an even wider scale.

I have family members who are very critical and over-judgmental as well. Let me tell you all something. I have IBS with diarrhea, and if you have read my intro along with other posts and replies, I have explained my ABDL side many times, about my fondest toddlerhood memories surrounding not only dirty diapers, but precious times as well, and how I use all of these memories, and especially the poop, as a coping outlet to deal with IBSD. Only one family member (a cousin) knows about my ABDL self, and she accepts it. I don't wish to roleplay or have anyone be my parent. I imagine all that. If other family members were to find out about this, they would abuse me both physically and verbally. Out of curiosity, I went on line, looking for others who have my interests in diapers and everything I mentioned above, and, tada, I found Adisc. I agree that Adisc has the most respectful and caring members ever. Some may not share my interests or have fun doing what I do, but they respect me just as I respect them. I have read posts from people from all walks of life, and really, before then, I wondered about my mentality. Since becoming a member, I am begining to realize that I am psychiatrically fine. When not acting out my childhood events surrounding my poop in private or lounging around in nothing but a diaper with the window blinds drawn and remeniscing of precious memories, you'll find me at a bar sometimes, telling jokes, laughing it up, and listening to music on the jukebox. I also like composing my own music. I play the guitar, keyboard, drums, and the didgeridoo. My hope is someday to have my own studio. I am currently trying to get a job at an air force base that hires the blind and others with various physical and mental challenges. Really, because of all of you, I respect myself and accept myself as I am, and I will not change no matter what. Thank you, Adisc, from the bottom of my heart.

 

[Deleted member 75838]

I just joined today after lurking on and off for probably a decade or more. Accepted my AB side quite a long time ago as fighting against it was pointless

Was more of a lurker as I generally don’t do social media, but ADISC has always seemed like a lovely welcoming community so I made an exception to my anti social media stance!