Carrying Supplies in Public... backpacks in stores?! NEED ADVICE

[JamisonFTM]

I have a lot of public bathroom anxiety, so I wear goodnites when I am out in public to avoid using unfamiliar or busy bathrooms. This has given me a lot of confidence to start leaving the house for longer periods of time, but I have caught myself needing to change and not being close to home.
I want to try changing in public, if I can find a safe (unisex/gender neutral) bathroom, but these are usually in stores. Lots of stores don't like you carrying backpacks into the store or into the bathroom.
How else do people carry their extra diapers and wipes? Do people change in their cars? Where else do yall change your diapers other than the bathroom?

(I know it may sound silly to some people, but I never had bathroom anxiety before I transitioned. It's something I'm working on, but until then, your advice and compassion is much appreciated, thanks )

 

[BigAl2]

If they ask just explain you need to change. And your supplies are in your back pack.

 

[johnsdiaper]

I agree with BigAl1…. All you should have to explain why you have backpack. Or better yet if you are wet before you go in, then go in dry. I have no problems explaining why I carry a backpack, if asked I just say this is my nappy bag and it has supplies in it that I may need.

 

[Richard101]

Wow - its not like that here - in fact it is quite normal for people to shop with back packs. The only place you might have a problem with it, if you took it into a crowded event, in which case it might be checked for bombs etc

 

[Bigbabybret]

Well, i'm in a wheelchair nowadays, but before yes a backpack is normal. No place will give you any issues if you just say it's for your bathroom needs, or just say its for IC supplies.

That said, some big places might look in the backpack at events and alike, but that isnt that big a deal and they usually run into this often enough that its not a big deal.

Now, i'd suggest to just use white diapers/pullups as opposed to colored or decorated ones, that might get an odd look, but that is able all that could be done.

At least in the US it would be a large lawsuit and/or issue keeping someone from thier IC supplies (medical supplies) and as such i dont think anyone is going to chance that you might not need them and risk the large problems that come with.

 

[schooner]

I am incontinent, and as I now wear diapers 24/7, changing in a public place is an occasional reality and common if I'm traveling. There's no doubt about it that it's challenging to change in public restrooms. I wear a premium diaper with a booster pad, and plastic pants over the diaper, so I have pretty good capacity. I always have a diaper bag (backpack) with spare diapers in the car but generally don't carry with me. I've been at this for decades and never had a problem bringing the backpack into a store restroom on those occasions when I did need to change. If I had been challenged I suppose I would have explained that I have supplies in the backpack that I need for a medical condition. I'm pit retty sure that most employees would back off at that point, but as I said, this has never happened. That said, changing a disposable diaper in a bathroom stall is noisy and awkward, but there's no getting around it. By the time I've pulled down my pants, pulled down my plastic pants, removed the wet diaper and replaced it with a dry diaper and booster pad, pulled up the plastic pants and then my pants, it's quite an ordeal. Enough so that I only do it if I know that I'm at diaper capacity and will wet my pants if I don't change.

 

[DelC]

Simply stating that the backpack contains medical supplies should be sufficient. You shouldn't have to say what they are, or what your condition is, or anything like that. With few exceptions, your medical supplies are private. As mentioned already, particularly in the US, pushing the issue and asking for more detail is grounds for a hefty lawsuit. Asking about the supplies themselves, might be permissible (I'm rusty on the specifics), but asking about your condition is an absolute no-go, and most businesses will steer well clear of the subject as a whole, to protect themselves. Ill-informed employees, on the other hand, usually don't know or care about such thinfs., so your mileage may vary.

 

[Wetshisbed]

I keep a bag with spare nappies, cream, pants etc handy all the time it usually is in my car when out and about.

 

[BoyLuc]

I have a lot of public bathroom anxiety, so I wear goodnites when I am out in public to avoid using unfamiliar or busy bathrooms. This has given me a lot of confidence to start leaving the house for longer periods of time, but I have caught myself needing to change and not being close to home.
I want to try changing in public, if I can find a safe (unisex/gender neutral) bathroom, but these are usually in stores. Lots of stores don't like you carrying backpacks into the store or into the bathroom.
How else do people carry their extra diapers and wipes? Do people change in their cars? Where else do yall change your diapers other than the bathroom?

(I know it may sound silly to some people, but I never had bathroom anxiety before I transitioned. It's something I'm working on, but until then, your advice and compassion is much appreciated, thanks )

You might consider this... I use black Tenas when out of the house unless on a long drive Then one up from that which are white. I have to carry a small over-the-shoulder bag with an injection supplies (steroid emergency kit). So it's in a small soft pencil bag (stands up in the back compartment), next to it I often have a Gatorade - can't get dehydrated or I might need the emergency kit). In the kit are 2-4 WetOne singles.. but a thin pack of wipes might be behind them. In a quart freezer ziplock bag I put a spare black Tena (women only) - can hardly tell it's even a pull-up. I almost always wear pull-ups only very occasionally a tab brief to try out at home. It's a duel DL and UIC but def about pull-up. I also have the same setup in my computer pack pack.

So I like GoodNights (for kinda special times when need very thin or cute ones) but they are not very good at all vs Tena and cost more @ about $1.10 ea.). The Tena black is much much better. I wear women's tight boyshorts (like Brazilian boxer briefs) over them. Helps keep them in place. The Tena black are "stiffer" than the Tena white (which are nighttime) You can get the Tenas on Amazon for like $0.67 each in black they come two packs of 18 (sm/med) Some WMarts used to carry them but now they don't. I also have Tena 3-way cream which I always use. Good hand cream too. So, they even look like regular underwear. Always Discreet Boutique (about $1 ea but sooo soft and sex - my goto for sleepovers ) is another good one that is better than Goodnights but not to the level of the Tena. But they do have a nice scent to them and those channels. I only wear women's pull-ups becaue they just fit so much better, I enjoy them so much more and I used to wear bikini or boyshorts anyway -

If I need a spare, it's in the bag. (I have a small software lunchbox size cooler of spares (white and black tena, pack of wipes, small refillable bottle of the Tena lotion just in case). I have occasionally found myself without a spare so I hind a couple in the tire well from myself just in case) I have gotten more anxious about not having what I need so I kind of overcompensate with like 10 in the bag.

Since you like pullups and the black kind of looks uni-gender, no one would know or care if you were wandering around a locker room in them on and nothing else. I know because I wear them to the gym. No one knows.

You def have to have your spidey sense on in FL. :-( I imagine initially it feels like all eyes on you. I've felt that way. I'm sort of middle of the spectrum genderfluid so... I am a bit more careful lately in public.

But I've changed in the car out of necessity many times and aside from throwing a towel over my lap, never gave it much thought. I don't were very fem clothes (no skirts) in public but tight women's stretch jeans. Can't see the Tenas under the jeans. NO ONE is going to give you any trouble changing even if they did notice. It is a bit more cumbersome to change a pull-up in a public restroom because I have to take of shoes and undies and be barefoot in the bathroom. Oh, I usually have a large dog-size doggie back in my pack too. To put the old one in. Also black.

I'm going to Rene Faire next weekend and it's a long day so been wondering. Was to go to an air show Sun but we skipped it. People were trapped in their cars for 3-4 hours on sat and had to go #1 out on the side of the road (no trees here) sooooo.. I wasn't up for that - rained anyway. (we both wear now... my partner had some issues being addressed medically and then decided how much he like the girl's (generic) pull-ups and he loves me in them. He likes them really fem generic fluffy white.. More just DL.

Link to the Amazon Tena black (a 5): TENA Stylish Black Underwear S/M 36 list $26 but you can put them on autoship for cheaper.

The white ones, that are a 6 72 for $48 but I had a coupon for $41 yesterday. TENA Incontinence Underwear for Women, Super Plus Absorbency, Small/Medium, 72 Count

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Hope that helps.

 

[diapernh]

My “diaper bag” is my every day backpack. It’s big and heavy. If I can avoid taking the whole thing in I will. I keep my changing kit in a black string backpack. When I stop I open the side door of my van and put my body in the way and grab a diaper from my bag and put it in the string backpack and take that in with me.

 

[BabyLouise]

Don5 have a change bag as such but carry two spare diapers, a pair of plastics, some wipes and some diaper bags whenever I go out wearing. Not too heavy. Sometimes bag is checked but rarely get any questions.

 

[RedStripeLvr]

I've changed in many public restrooms and never had an issue. The first was at a Target and I was sure everyone in the store knew what I was doing and it felt like the tape noise was on blast! But you know what? I survived it. The first couple times were filled with anxiety, but I realized that no one seemed to care or even notice. I've carried a backpack with supplies, a tablet case with a diaper in it, and on a few occasions just carried a dry diaper in my hand and went to the restroom. Have never been stopped or questioned. Not a big deal.

 

[JamisonFTM]

You might consider this... I use black Tenas when out of the house unless on a long drive Then one up from that which are white. I have to carry a small over-the-shoulder bag with an injection supplies (steroid emergency kit). So it's in a small soft pencil bag (stands up in the back compartment), next to it I often have a Gatorade - can't get dehydrated or I might need the emergency kit). In the kit are 2-4 WetOne singles.. but a thin pack of wipes might be behind them. In a quart freezer ziplock bag I put a spare black Tena (women only) - can hardly tell it's even a pull-up. I almost always wear pull-ups only very occasionally a tab brief to try out at home. It's a duel DL and UIC but def about pull-up. I also have the same setup in my computer pack pack.

So I like GoodNights (for kinda special times when need very thin or cute ones) but they are not very good at all vs Tena and cost more @ about $1.10 ea.). The Tena black is much much better. I wear women's tight boyshorts (like Brazilian boxer briefs) over them. Helps keep them in place. The Tena black are "stiffer" than the Tena white (which are nighttime) You can get the Tenas on Amazon for like $0.67 each in black they come two packs of 18 (sm/med) Some WMarts used to carry them but now they don't. I also have Tena 3-way cream which I always use. Good hand cream too. So, they even look like regular underwear. Always Discreet Boutique (about $1 ea but sooo soft and sex - my goto for sleepovers ) is another good one that is better than Goodnights but not to the level of the Tena. But they do have a nice scent to them and those channels. I only wear women's pull-ups becaue they just fit so much better, I enjoy them so much more and I used to wear bikini or boyshorts anyway -

If I need a spare, it's in the bag. (I have a small software lunchbox size cooler of spares (white and black tena, pack of wipes, small refillable bottle of the Tena lotion just in case). I have occasionally found myself without a spare so I hind a couple in the tire well from myself just in case) I have gotten more anxious about not having what I need so I kind of overcompensate with like 10 in the bag.

Since you like pullups and the black kind of looks uni-gender, no one would know or care if you were wandering around a locker room in them on and nothing else. I know because I wear them to the gym. No one knows.

You def have to have your spidey sense on in FL. :-( I imagine initially it feels like all eyes on you. I've felt that way. I'm sort of middle of the spectrum genderfluid so... I am a bit more careful lately in public.

But I've changed in the car out of necessity many times and aside from throwing a towel over my lap, never gave it much thought. I don't were very fem clothes (no skirts) in public but tight women's stretch jeans. Can't see the Tenas under the jeans. NO ONE is going to give you any trouble changing even if they did notice. It is a bit more cumbersome to change a pull-up in a public restroom because I have to take of shoes and undies and be barefoot in the bathroom. Oh, I usually have a large dog-size doggie back in my pack too. To put the old one in. Also black.

I'm going to Rene Faire next weekend and it's a long day so been wondering. Was to go to an air show Sun but we skipped it. People were trapped in their cars for 3-4 hours on sat and had to go #1 out on the side of the road (no trees here) sooooo.. I wasn't up for that - rained anyway. (we both wear now... my partner had some issues being addressed medically and then decided how much he like the girl's (generic) pull-ups and he loves me in them. He likes them really fem generic fluffy white.. More just DL.

Link to the Amazon Tena black (a 5): TENA Stylish Black Underwear S/M 36 list $26 but you can put them on autoship for cheaper.

The white ones, that are a 6 72 for $48 but I had a coupon for $41 yesterday. TENA Incontinence Underwear for Women, Super Plus Absorbency, Small/Medium, 72 Count

View attachment 132804​

Hope that helps.

Thanks for all your suggestions and encouragement! I will definitely be trying out some of these to see if I like them and they are as discrete on me as you describe.
I already have wider hips and like wearing tighter shorts (it's hot here in FL). So I don't like wearing my tab style diapers out much, bc I have to wear a lot baggier clothes to hide the extra bulk. It also makes me more insecure about my hips and thighs, and make my anxiety higher. I also wear boxer-briefs over my pull-ups when I go out, to help keep them in place and smooth things out.
I do appreciate all your advice and support

 

[Tinklepanties]

I keep a bag with spare nappies, cream, pants etc handy all the time it usually is in my car when out and about.

Same here. I keep a gym bag with several different thicknesses of diapers, wipes, powder/lotion, disposal bags, as well as a complete change of clothes in my car. I’ve become good at changing in the car if needed, as it’s an SUV and I can put the back seats down.

 

[JamisonFTM]

Same here. I keep a gym bag with several different thicknesses of diapers, wipes, powder/lotion, disposal bags, as well as a complete change of clothes in my car. I’ve become good at changing in the car if needed, as it’s an SUV and I can put the back seats down.

I recently put a couple spare pull-ups and wipes in my center council, I also have an SUV with tinted windows. So changing in the car isn't out of the picture for me either.

 

[Belarin]

I've never had any issues carrying a backpack anywhere in the UK, no one says anything about it but I guess different locations have their own views.

Personally I would say you don't even need to claim it carries medical supplies etc. there are a huge number of bags you can get (backpacks and over the shoulder types) that have very well hidden pockets inside, just get one with a hidden pocket large enough to store a nappy or two and if anyone asks, you have a bag to carry your shopping and you can even open it to let the see nothing inside.

 

[DelC]

I've never had any issues carrying a backpack anywhere in the UK, no one says anything about it but I guess different locations have their own views.

Personally I would say you don't even need to claim it carries medical supplies etc. there are a huge number of bags you can get (backpacks and over the shoulder types) that have very well hidden pockets inside, just get one with a hidden pocket large enough to store a nappy or two and if anyone asks, you have a bag to carry your shopping and you can even open it to let the see nothing inside.

At least in the US, putting your shopping in any bag other than a reusable tote with carry handles, that is obviously meant for shopping, particularly putting your shopping in a backpack, will get you detained by security pretty darn quick. Maybe not until you approach the doors, but...it's a recipe for trouble. Having stuff in hidden pockets while claiming the bag to be empty will go over even worse.

 

[Mickeymic]

Wear thick tab style diapers and carry my backpack every place I'm going to be for more than an hour. I live in FL also, and only a few times was it checked. The only place that I had an issue was in the courthouse, but once they searched it thoroughly, I was allowed to carry it in.