A "you're not a baby anymore" incident

[LittleMissPink]

So at work today there was a young girl on the floor crying (no idea what about I only caught the tail end of it) but her mum comes over and says "stop that. You're not a baby any more your're nearly 3".
I just stopped for a moment and thought "then what the hell does a baby look like?! She's two years old!". I hate these sayings normally but this time hearing someone say it to an actual baby, I didn't know whether to start laughing or be angry.

It's a short story but just couldn't help but share as I always hear parents say this stuff to their kids "you're too old for that", "that's for babies", "stop acting like a baby" yet in this situation she was actually a baby. I think some parents expect their kids to grow up way too fast.

 

[MajesticUnicorns]

What I hate more is over in the UK, I hear it quite offen of "stop crying or that man will come and get you" or even, "go to bed or I'll call the police" as a 3-6 year old, it's terrifying, I know first hand. I keep witnessing it happening when I'm out, I really wish I could say something but I never have the courage to do so.

 

[PCBaby]

I'm sorry bit in this sort of situation I think as concerned adults we should say something. Recently I was on the bus and a woman threatened to spank her, so I pointed out that it was :-
A, illegal,
B, if she did I would have the bus stopped and locked.
C, I'd call the police and have her arrested.
D, make sure the police involve social services.

Whatever the parents call it, it's abuse.

 

[Katie2fingers]

I just think wait, I'm a two-year-old too. I can cry if I want.

 

[CookieMonstah]

Well a 2 year old isn't a baby, they're a toddler to be honest. While I wouldn't use that kind of scaremongering tactic myself the mother is implying that's how a baby acts, do you want to be a baby? Obviously children want to be independent, so they won't like it.

 

[BobbiSueEllen]

What I hate more is over in the UK, I hear it quite offen of "stop crying or that man will come and get you" or even, "go to bed or I'll call the police"...

Parents over there actually say that??? What the...???

 

[MajesticUnicorns]

Parents over there actually say that??? What the...???

Really wish I was joking. Often the parents just point at a random passerby.

 

[CookieMonstah]

Parents over there actually say that??? What the...???

I've never heard anyone say that, that's scary

 

[PCBaby]

I've been in asda and a mum pointed me out as "the man". I went ballistic.

 

[PCBaby]

Well a 2 year old isn't a baby, they're a toddler to be honest. While I wouldn't use that kind of scaremongering tactic myself the mother is implying that's how a baby acts, do you want to be a baby? Obviously children want to be independent, so they won't like it.

I'm sorry but I disagree if a two year old is crying there is usually a reason for it. Yes it can be down to a temper tantrum, but you just walk away from them (while still keeping a discrete eye on them).

 

[RetroGamerGuy]

That is so incredibly rude to point out some random person and say "Hey that man over there is gonna abduct you and take you away forever" as a scare tactic. I mean seriously excuse me?

 

[BobbiSueEllen]

That is so incredibly rude to point out some random person and say "Hey that man over there is gonna abduct you and take you away forever" as a scare tactic. I mean seriously excuse me?

Darn right. A definite parental cop-out.

 

[CookieMonstah]

I'm sorry but I disagree if a two year old is crying there is usually a reason for it. Yes it can be down to a temper tantrum, but you just walk away from them (while still keeping a discrete eye on them).

I'm not saying there isn't a reason, I agree with you completely, although I'd try and get them to calm down by talking to them and distracting them first.

 

[PurpleScorpion]

I agree that the way this random parent handled it was bad, but I can attest: If you want a kid to do something, telling them it's the "big boy/girl/kid" thing to do usually helps. I've seen my aunts and uncles get their kids (my cousins) to help with chores by framing requests as "Would you be a big boy/girl and help me (insert chore)?".

 

[LittleMissPink]

Well a 2 year old isn't a baby, they're a toddler to be honest.

I would disagree. Maybe not a newborn baby but according to some "Baby can be used to refer to any child from birth to age 4 years old, thus encompassing newborns, infants, and toddlers."

I would be one of those people. It's subjective.

Infant to Toddler Years Age-By-Age Cheat Sheet

What age is considered a toddler? How about a newborn, infant, or baby? Here, we break down the age ranges for the common terms.

www.verywellfamily.com

 

[Soarandragon]

I'm sorry bit in this sort of situation I think as concerned adults we should say something. Recently I was on the bus and a woman threatened to spank her, so I pointed out that it was :-
A, illegal,
B, if she did I would have the bus stopped and locked.
C, I'd call the police and have her arrested.
D, make sure the police involve social services.

Whatever the parents call it, it's abuse.

Unfortunately in the states threatening corporal punishment is not illegal. The only time corporal punishment is illegal is if it’s excessive. You can actually get in more trouble for calling the police on someone just for threatening corporal punishment. Calling in a false claim of child abuse can lead to fines.

I use the line “do you need your butt beat?” On my kids all the time but have never laid a hand on my kids. I’m also a licensed foster parent and know all applicable laws regarding it. I treat my kids like older kids to show them that the deserve respect and are expected to show it as well.

 

[Sidewinder]

So at work today there was a young girl on the floor crying (no idea what about I only caught the tail end of it) but her mum comes over and says "stop that. You're not a baby any more your're nearly 3".
I just stopped for a moment and thought "then what the hell does a baby look like?! She's two years old!". I hate these sayings normally but this time hearing someone say it to an actual baby, I didn't know whether to start laughing or be angry.

It's a short story but just couldn't help but share as I always hear parents say this stuff to their kids "you're too old for that", "that's for babies", "stop acting like a baby" yet in this situation she was actually a baby. I think some parents expect their kids to grow up way too fast.

There's no singular way of determining human growth, as there are so many factors therein to consider.

For instance, someone who is chronologically 30 years old may be emotionally still a teenager, but intellectually a wise old sage.

In other instances, there have been average elementary school students who have displayed the emotional and intellectual mindset of an average middle aged person.

There are also chronological middle-to-senior aged adults who display the intellectual and emotional capacities of their respective chronological ages, yet physically look like elementary-to-middle school aged children.

 

[dogboy]

I was terribly bullied by my cousins when I was 6 - 8 years old. They would beat me up and when I'd cry, they'd call me a baby and here I am now enjoying wearing a diaper. Makes you wonder doesn't it.

 

[KCA]

I would disagree. Maybe not a newborn baby but according to some "Baby can be used to refer to any child from birth to age 4 years old, thus encompassing newborns, infants, and toddlers."

I would be one of those people. It's subjective.

Infant to Toddler Years Age-By-Age Cheat Sheet

What age is considered a toddler? How about a newborn, infant, or baby? Here, we break down the age ranges for the common terms.

www.verywellfamily.com

I agree with this, I make the distinction between infants and toddlers, but they are all babies.

As for the mum's reaction in the original scenario, it seems a bit over the top. As you described it, she didn't even seem to want to find out what wrong with her daughter. I don't know if the daughter was wearing a nappy, but maybe she had done something and wanted to be changed, or maybe she was just upset about something. Find out what's wrong before castigating your child!

 

[diapernh]

What really burns me up is when parents see a police officer and tell their kids “if you don’t_______ (behave, eat, etc) that police officer will arrest you”. That is the worst thing you can tell your kids. The one person who they should not fear when they are lost, hurt, in danger, etc is the police officers. I have friends who are officers and one flat out will get up and tell parents off that they should not do that.