I really dislike it when people call this just a fetish or kink, for me its part on my identity, I tried to deny this part of me and it had huge negative impacts on my physical and mental health.
I love mornings where I physically have to check my diaper to see if its wet and I am surprised to find a fairly soaked diaper. No real dreams last night either, no waking up.
Dylan Lewis's book Adult Baby is blowing my mind. Specially the part about repression and denial, I was in total denial my childhood was messed up, I mean its hard to understand... Its like I really didn't see myself when I looked back at my childhood, I easily ignored huge issues like murder and abuse when I sought help from professionals.
I just bought th book Adult Baby, on kindle, it looks pretty interesting, its written by some wierdo named Dylan... I tease, Dylan is a very cool person and I was inspired to buy his book due to all the stuff I have seen him write here at Adisc.
I woke up midstream last night wetting myself, I was confused and had to see if my diaper was wet, it was mildly wet at that point. Was a strange sensation, didn't feel like wetting really, just a sensation in my diaper, then I couldn't find my paci for a minute and then I went back to sleep. Woke up pretty soaked.
I think I need a lock on my bathroom door. I keep getting up in my sleep, and using the potty, I am cognitive enough to undo the tip tape, and put them back on properly, and go back to bed. It annoys me because I was wearing a thick diaper and there's no reason for me to get up, and it worries me because its sleep walking, and there are dangerous drugs in my bathroom.
I get up in my sleep and use the potty, very annoying I woke up bone dry and could barely pee, I was empty. I think I need to lock the bathroom at night.
Nurse at my urologist office said my diaper was cute and wanted to know where I get them, was the highlight of my day. Next week I find out what the test finds, I am guessing expanded bladder, prostate is ok.
Slept so well last night, woke up in a soaked diaper, so much better than the night before, not I got to get ready for a urologist appointment. oh boy.
I think a part of my insomnia is my little alter ego trying to stay up past bedtime, there is always a part of me that resists bedtime. When I denied this part of me, I found it took its anger out on other parts of my life and sleep was the biggest one it could attack.
Woke up wet, not sure if I woke up and wet and went back to bed or not, I wasn't as surprised to find myself in a wet diaper. I may be getting use to it again, but it had been a week since I had woke up wet
I just had a syncope or seizure episode, I am safe and ok, but a little upset, I really hope it wasn't a seizure, I have epilepsy and its well controlled but that doesn't always last forever, I am hoping it was just a syncope or fainting episode. I live alone and this could end my independence.
The adult bottle I ordered a month ago, finally arrived, I love it, extra long nipple, kinda like an adult paci. Gonna be perfect at bedtime. or naps. I think I might start taking naps again, try to relive some memories from childhood