Worried....

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Scales

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Me and my Fiancée just spoke and it'd seem she just realised my little side isn't a phase...
So she's gone a little cold, and i'm scared it my affect our relationship.
Nothing I can do for a while, so just some kind words is all I'm asking for.

She's very accepting and gladly participates.
So guess she just had a diffent time frame then me.

Thanks for stopping by.
 
I don't know your ages but maybe her time clock started ticking and she wants to start a family. Try and talk to her gently and see what's going on with her. She may just need a little space for a bit. Maybe you can compromise and just have a little side every once in awhile. Try not to worry too much. Keep us posted.
 
She may just need some time to adjust her thinking. Stay open to talking about this with her but let her bring it up. Reassure her that other than the time frame, nothing has changed.
 
Both you and zipperless are right in that there isn't much you can do so there isn't much point in worrying about it. If she's very accepting and gladly participates, I most definitely wouldn't be concerned. If she was under the impression that this was just a phase, then I'm guessing she just needs some time to fully wrap her head around the fact that this is going to be a permanent part of your relationship. It's understandable that even the most accepting and open minded person would need a little bit of time to think about the possible stipulations of something like this, given that she's preparing to quite possibly spend the rest of her life with you. It sounds like she's taken it exceptionally well so far which is a lot more than most can say. I guess what I'm trying to say is just give her a little time, and try not to worry about it. I think you'll both be fine :)
 
Thank you all so much. I'm gar less concerned today and all this advice really helps.
 
If you want, you can invite her to learn more about ABDL topics by suggesting some websites that have good information for partners/family/friends of ABDL. There are some good sites with some good information. It might help if you point her in the direction of those sites rather than hoping she finds them amongst all the other information (and some misinformation) that is out there waiting to be googled.

You might invite her to join these forums and ask questions and see that for most ABDLs this is a part of a healthy lifestyle and part of healthy relationships.

Good luck. Hopefully she can love and accept you for who you are. You are the same person she fell in love with, even if she didn't realize the extent of the ABDL tendencies at the time. You haven't changed. Her understanding of one aspect of your personality has changed, but YOU haven't changed. Hopefully she can see that.
 
Will do my best to inform her of these sites and information, it might make everything easier for her.
 
As a new romantic partner of an AB/DL (and not an AB/DL myself), I can attest that sometimes I feel a little lost. I don't know how old you are, or how long you two have been together, but the concept of adult baby confuses most people. And when you introduce love into the mix, it can become even more confusing! I agree with everyone above, don't worry about it too much. Encourage her to be compassionate and patient with you, and return that gesture in kind. I agree that she could learn a lot from these forums, I certainly have! Love is also about compromise, but the terms of that compromise are between you and her and both of you have to be comfortable with it. I certainly wish you luck Scales!
 
I was thinking similar to ornatorrinco in that if she thought it was temporary, she hadn't gone online to research infantalism, which may be a good thing. There's a lot of bad sites and misinformation, so having some control to direct her to the few good sites could work in your favor. I think she just needs some time to let all of this sink in. I think having Magnolias' perspective may be helpful and give some insight. I'm sure it is very confusing, and trying to balance a normal sex life with regression, diapers, etc. must be very challenging, especially in the beginning.

I think you should make some compromises with your "little" time and normal sexual activities. In the big picture, all these things can be worked out so that both of you can achieve a level of satisfaction.
 
Sounds like you two have a pretty good relationship but now you both are a little apprehensive because you are approaching a mine field. Sorry to be so blunt. This comes from my own experience so, if it doesn't appear to match your situation, please just ignore this.

My ex went along with a little diaper play before we were married but she, too, assumed it was just a phase. Many years later the diaper thing was the major factor in our divorce. Don't underestimate her feelings about this. I believe that, over time, two main things need to be established.

One is that she needs to understand this is a permanent part of you that will always require some kind of outlet in order for you be happy. This doesn't mean there is nothing else in the relationship that makes you happy, just that if this aspect is ignored it will eventually strain your feelings because it simply will not go away. This may be a difficult thing for her to accept.

The second is that she needs to know you will always be the man in her life and will live up to her expectations as the man in the relationship. Whether her image is that of the traditional male role as lover, provider, and protector, or some other role model, she needs to know you want that too, and can handle it. Your baby side has needs that must be met one way or the other but but she needs to believe they will not interfere with your responsibilities.
 
Drifter said:
Sounds like you two have a pretty good relationship but now you both are a little apprehensive because you are approaching a mine field. Sorry to be so blunt. This comes from my own experience so, if it doesn't appear to match your situation, please just ignore this.

My ex went along with a little diaper play before we were married but she, too, assumed it was just a phase. Many years later the diaper thing was the major factor in our divorce. Don't underestimate her feelings about this. I believe that, over time, two main things need to be established.

One is that she needs to understand this is a permanent part of you that will always require some kind of outlet in order for you be happy. This doesn't mean there is nothing else in the relationship that makes you happy, just that if this aspect is ignored it will eventually strain your feelings because it simply will not go away. This may be a difficult thing for her to accept.

The second is that she needs to know you will always be the man in her life and will live up to her expectations as the man in the relationship. Whether her image is that of the traditional male role as lover, provider, and protector, or some other role model, she needs to know you want that too, and can handle it. Your baby side has needs that must be met one way or the other but but she needs to believe they will not interfere with your responsibilities.
This is exactly what I told her. And she seemed to accept it well, but I'm laying off anything fro a month or so, kind alike a break from it.
 
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