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Why can't my mom stop b****ing about computer parts when I pay rent, etc :(

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Bryce

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Why does my mom b***h about how me buying computer parts with MY money is a waste? I mean I don't do anything else, this is my life and that's all I care about. I pay her rent and help with bills so why f**ken get so pissed when I buy what I want :( She goes out and buys shoes, clothes, etc, etc for herself so why can't I do that with my computers :(
 
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Why does my mom b***h about how me buying computer parts with MY money is a waste? I mean I don't do anything else, this is my life and that's all I care about. I pay her rent and help with bills so why f**ken get so pissed when I buy what I want :( She goes out and buys shoes, clothes, etc, etc for herself so why can't I do that with my computers :(
Because she still sees you for a large role that you're playing: her child living at home.

The fact that you pay rent doesn't enter into her mind. It's her domain. The quickest (and best) way to a happy end is to move out and stand on your own two feet. Pay rent to someone else.
 

Bryce

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Thing is once I move out that's it, I'm out lol. I can't find no where as cheap as home you know. There's rent, insurance, etc, etc, etc, etc. I pay a solid $425/mo here and the internet bills. Once I move out I'll have NO money left each month. I don't make but like $10/hr and I still have to support my computer hobby, or life I mean.
 
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Thing is once I move out that's it, I'm out lol. I can't find no where as cheap as home you know. There's rent, insurance, etc, etc, etc, etc. I pay a solid $425/mo here and the internet bills. Once I move out I'll have NO money left each month. I don't make but like $10/hr and I still have to support my computer hobby, or life I mean.
Dang money!

I stand by my gut feeling that your mom still sees the house as her domain. Hopefully, though, others will weigh in with thoughts and suggestions that could be helpful.
 

Darkfinn

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Gotta love parents that think they can tell you what to do with your money. My mother was that way too... until one summer when I got fed up with it and not-too-sweetly pointed out that I was working more hours in a week than she was, and that I would do what I damn well pleased with my hard earned cash.

Eventually you get to a point where you have to put your foot down and let them know that it is YOUR money and YOUR life. As long as the bills are paid you can spend the remainder however you wish.
 

Pojo

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Thing is once I move out that's it, I'm out lol. I can't find no where as cheap as home you know. There's rent, insurance, etc, etc, etc, etc. I pay a solid $425/mo here and the internet bills. Once I move out I'll have NO money left each month. I don't make but like $10/hr and I still have to support my computer hobby, or life I mean.
You basically admitted right there that your computer parts are a waste of money. You won't be able to buy them once you are out on your own, but you need to learn your priorities. Sure you have the luxury now of buying things that you want, but I hope you have some money saved up in case you have to move out. You need to set your priorities straight and realize that your computer hobby doesn't come in the same priority line as paying your rent.
 

Calico

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Luckily my own mother never got on my back about money. Maybe because I was a money saver because I am so obsessed about money.
 

Shredder92

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I barely make enough money to buy anything (£4/Hour - which in London won't get you much) So I'm happy with just saving it up little by little until I can eventually get a new guitar which will pay for itself in the future gigs i get over the course of THE REST OF MY LIFE.

Your mum is basically pissed at you because you are buying computer parts, which she obviously views as either childish things, or useless, when she doesn't realise how profitable they can be. I mean, building a computer saves SO much money if you go for top quality (my mate made a 4 terabyte Computer, with 4GB RAM and top end graphics card/processor etc. and payed only £200 more than I did for an average computer)

If you're REALLY good, you could make and sell top quality computers for a hefty profit, whilst still out-pricing all leading sellers, like PC World. If your mum sees/ understands that potential I think she will pretty much never bother you again on buying computer parts
 
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Bryce

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It's a hobby yes, but I also build them and buy parts all the time since I work with computers daily. My job is a video editor, so I'm always looking out for things that could make my job easier, etc. And right now I figure I'll go ahead and get all the stuff I could ever need and when I move out I at least have all the stuff I need to do a job. And yes, I do save some money now. I put about $350 back into savings each month, well every 2 weeks when I'm paid. So, sometimes I don't get to spend anything on parts, others I get to spend around $300ish in parts. I know what I'm doing with my cash.

I do pay rent, internet, cable, phone, and part of the light bill. Though, I do get to write all of that off on my taxes lol.
 

DotDotDot

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I collect junk ... all sorts of junk. My mom stopped complaining when I showed her that I can make money with junk.
 

MixyNyxi

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Parents do that. I've been living on my own for awhile and mine still hound me about the money I spend on mostly everything that isn't necessary (especially my anime obsession). But the good thing is that it doesn't particularly matter what they think anymore once your life is your own.

Unfortunately in your case I think, living in the same house with them, even when paying rent, kinda blurs the line for them. But it's not like they are trying to force you to stop, or so it seems. You just have to learn to deal with the badgering. They are always going to think of you as a child and get in your business and offer unwanted opinions, even when you do move out. I think it's in their job description. Most of the time, they mean well, but they just don't get why you think differently or have different priorities or wants than they do. In the end, it's your life and you'll do your own thing regardless. They will get the point eventually, but they probably won't like that you don't go by what they think is best anymore.
 

ShippoFox

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As some others said, I think you just need to tell her that it's your money. She can't tell you what to buy or not buy with it. I would also recommend moving out, but that's very expensive. Plus I wouldn't really want to live alone, but lots of people seem okay with it. So if you don't mind living alone, then maybe consider it.... not like tomorrow, but as a plan for the near future.
 

Bryce

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She thinks just b/c shes going through a divorce that we automatically owe her something. I'm like wtf does the divorce have to do with me? I help her out with money all the time so what does it have to do with me, you know.

I do pay rent, internet, cable, phone, half the light bill, but then again it's all taken out of my taxes due to work. But still she gets some of the money from it. I'm just fed up with it. I've even started looking for a place to move to and she's like you can't move out there's a divorce going on. Again, WTF?!
 

ShippoFox

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They can certainly tell you what you can and cannot do with THEIR space.
Of course they can, but whether it's actually the right thing to do or not depends on the situation (if the son/daughter is spending all his/her money on drugs or getting drunk all the time, then that's a time to be stern). That's not really relevant here though anyway, since he's paying rent and it's his money buying the computer parts in the first place.
 

Gil

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Either way, she can still play the "My house, my rules" card.
 

mm3

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Before my mother moved out (yes you read that right) she used to be 10x worse than that, I think my rant/hate threads are still here in the Regular's Forum if you want to take a look at how bad I had it. Although now no one tells me how or where to spend my money (mostly) I'm regretting buying a few things because now I can't afford to pay my license fee, and I have until Friday to pay it or I have to wait a whole 'nother year before I can apply for my full license again. (Damn you New York State and your $72.50 fees!!!)

I've even started looking for a place to move to and she's like you can't move out there's a divorce going on. Again, WTF?!
You're 20 years old. She doesn't have the right to make those decisions for you anymore, so don't take that to your head ;)
 

dogboy

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As a professional musician and a keyboardist, I could spend a fortune on keyboards and related equipment, but I soon made a deal with myself. I decided that I would only buy things that could eventually pay for themselves. If I bought a new keyboard, I had to have a need for it, and I had to be out using it on paying gigs. It's so easy to be obsessed with every new thing that comes out, thinking that this is the answer to everything when it's not.

When I moved out, I was making $6000.00 a year and barely getting by, but I had my freedom. For me, it was worth it. You have to weigh the one against the other.
 
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