Who cares...

BearTale

Est. Contributor
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Adult Baby, Diaper Lover, Other
Hey everyone I just wanted to post something I think we all need to hear as ABDLs on a daily basis. I see a lot of posts regarding “how do I hide my diapers” or “how do I secretly wear in public”

Who cares what people think. Nobody can tell you what underwear to use and nobody cares. As long as you are discreet and minding your business literally nothing happens. Here are just a few examples of where I wear with ZERO issues

The gym
College
My work
My friends houses
athletic events

The list goes on and on.
And let me be clear I am not telling you guys to do this but if you want to wear ANY diaper all the time DO IT!! Nobody is going to care if you are confident and discreet ^_^ I started wearing 24/7 a year ago and never went back and felt free..

I just want others to be happy and please don’t take this the wrong way I just know people fear judgement and ridicule in this community. Your beautiful for your love of diapers and fun things. Don’t forget that everyone <3
 

DanielW

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I've had a similar experience. I'm fairly discrete. Some people know I wear diapers, some don't. Those who have found out my situation have all been supportive. If someone wants to know more about it, I'll tell them. So far though, no one cares about the state of my underwear
 

Lewis Badger

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216
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Diaper Lover, Little
I have to disagree at least partially here, with my parents having found my diapers in the past (no longer a problem as I now live alone), there were some uncomfortable discussions that in my opinion are best avoided.

On the topic of public wearing, I'm of the opinion that no one really cares, the worst case scenario is that is a setting where you're hanging out for longer periods of time and you're wet (so you're crinkling more), then it might become suspicious, and even then, there's basically a million reasons before people would suspect you of wearing diapers in public, or indeed that you might be wearing a diaper for any reasons other than you need to, at which point it would have meant that they paid too much attention anyway.
 

Trevor

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While you can be spotted or found out, it's pretty rare. If you wear a whole lot, even something unlikely might happen. The vast majority of people won't notice and the vast majority of those who notice won't say anything. It's pretty safe but I think it's still prudent to have an idea of how you will react if it comes up.
 

Evahasgone2

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55
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I feel it's up to the wearer. I wear everywhere so if anyone was to ask me that I don't know. I just say medical reasons. Some people I won't even respond to because to be honest it's none of their business. If I am nice and smelly I move even quicker through the crowd, so to me not a bother or concern.
 

BabyTyrant

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I agree to an extent as most people do not care in the slightest; there are some people that may try to cause us problems if they have any clue in the slightest that we like diapers without a medical need; these people being the few that think we are Paedophiles or Perverts for liking diapers.

That is something I could never understand and they cant prove, so I dont know how I would react if I had to deal with those kinds of people; I suppose that depends on my attitude at the time.

But for the most part you are more than likely not gonna run into somebody like that, so I just go about my business and if I feel like going out with a diaper on (secretly beneath normal clothes as I act discreetly) and of course using it I will.

I really dont care what random people think, I just wouldn't want to deal with the special breed of idiot's that has to try to ruin someone else's life because of something they dont like when it doesn't involve them.
 

Fatmac

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Diaper Lover, Incontinent
I’m in for the “no care. no worries”. I wear 24/7
now and am getting more comfortable and confident daily. This is the only life I get and I am dedicating every second of it to what makes me happy and well as long as it hurts no one and isn’t destructive
 

PapaBear001

Come say hello to Papa Bear!
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For me at this point, it would be like wearing a leather gimp suite with a zipper mouth to work. I would be walking around with a boner all day. I wore a diaper for most of the day Saturday at home and it was damn hard to keep that thing down. A few minutes of beat down is ok the first time but my Prostate can't keep up. Mr. Dinky is back a few minutes later and it's going to be another couple hours before I can do that again. Plus I am trying to type a post with a keyboard see-sawing on my lap. It does make for amusing typos!

I could not do this at work. I can imagine some of you might not encounter this situation but for me it would not be appropriate. :)
 

Trevor

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For me at this point, it would be like wearing a leather gimp suite with a zipper mouth to work. I would be walking around with a boner all day. I wore a diaper for most of the day Saturday at home and it was damn hard to keep that thing down. A few minutes of beat down is ok the first time but my Prostate can't keep up. Mr. Dinky is back a few minutes later and it's going to be another couple hours before I can do that again. Plus I am trying to type a post with a keyboard see-sawing on my lap. It does make for amusing typos!

I could not do this at work. I can imagine some of you might not encounter this situation but for me it would not be appropriate. :)
I used to feel that way. It would have been a huge mental and physical distraction. It probably had something to do with getting older but I also wore more often socially and for longer periods, and all those things together got me to a point where it's no more distracting than anything else. It's an opportunity, not a requirement, which is nice.
 

RubberJin

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346
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Diaper Lover
I think it very much CAN matter in some situations, especially if you were wearing something clearly non-medical in purpose.

Like it or not, some folks in some places are less accepting or understanding (and some are downright ignorant arseholes) of a lot of stuff.

There are folks who mistakenly connect ABDL to pedophilia, for example, and that could lead to really bad outcomes so it's worth being aware of risks - just like some places it's not safe to be openly gay or trans. It's awful, but that's the world we live in.

Also, people not saying anything does not equal people not caring or not noticing - there's vast chasm between what someone will discretely notice and the point at which most people would give any sort of signal that they noticed and/or disapproved, especially in some cultures - again, rumour and disapproval could easily build up & be spread behind your back in some communities even if no-one ever said anything to your face.

I'm not trying to scare people, just wanted to point out that not everyone enjoys the luxury of living in an open & tolerant society.
 

tiny

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There are folks who mistakenly connect ABDL to pedophilia, for example, and that could lead to really bad outcomes...
I hear that's a common fear from ABDLs, but I think it's way overblown. Discreetly wearing diapers isn't going to make any sane person think you're a paedo.

But what I do worry about is someone noticing and thinking I'm a "weirdo". I live in a small village. If someone notices something "odd" about me, it will affect my reputation in the community. If someone at work were to find out, gossip would spread like wildfire, and it just gets in the way of presenting a professional image.

So yeah... I tend to avoid wearing diapers outside the house. For me, it's not worth the hassle/risk/fear.

I even feel uncomfortable when putting my dustbin out for collection! Most waste goes in the recycling bin, the food waste bin, or the garden waste bin. So most houses put very little into the dustbin -- just tissues and non-recyclable plastic film. Yet I have a great sack full of nappies that weigh a ton every fortnight! I'm not so worried what the dustmen think, but I do wonder if the neighbours have noticed how much "rubbish" I throw away... :-/

VERY occasionally I have a "depressive episode" where (somehow) the constant sensory input from wearing a diaper as I go about my business acts as a kind of white noise that stops me having depressive thoughts and keeps me feeling calm, when nothing else works. I care less what people I don't know think, and care more about calming my mind with whatever techniques work for me.

I don't think most people notice... but it's possible that some do. It's hard to walk normally without diapers changing your gait. And trousers just don't hang right... :(

If you live in an urban area where no one gives a shit about anyone they don't know, and no-one's going to care or remember you if they notice you're wearing diapers, then people should feel brave enough to wear in public if that's what they want. But in places where "everyone knows your name" (small communities, at work, etc.), I think it's quite important to be cautious. Keeping diapers a private secret isn't a bad thing. Pushing the boundaries isn't a bad thing. It's your life, and you've got to live it how you think best. There are consequences to every choice -- some good, some bad, and some are good or bad depending on what you want.

Have fun, but be careful would be my advice... (y)
 

pd8615

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Adult Baby, Babyfur
"If you live in an urban area where no one gives a shit about anyone they don't know, and no-one's going to care or remember you if they notice you're wearing diapers, then people should feel brave enough to wear in public if that's what they want. But in places where "everyone knows your name" (small communities, at work, etc.)".

Perhaps it is a matter of how one wears diapers and for what need.

I wear thin ATN's under loose street clothes and, depending on what and where, a jacket with a bit of a crinkle to it.

Rarely use them for their intended purpose (around others) and never for number two.

For myself, it is a comfort thing. Just like I have a dog plush toy in my car.

Got asked once in fifteen years.

I like dogs. Don't need to discuss it more than that.

Don't make others uncomfortable, but there is a middle ground.
 

tenderbottoms47

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Adult Baby
o_O
Who cares what people think. Nobody can tell you what underwear to use and nobody cares. As long as you are discreet and minding your business literally nothing happens. Here are just a few examples of where I wear with ZERO issues
Exactly!! Who cares what anyone thinks. That's just how I view wearing diapers out in public. First off, no one would ever know you wearing for non medical reasons or that your ABDL let's get that straight. I feel most abdl's or just dl's put way to much pressure on themselves about someone noticing if there wearing a diaper for crying out loud! Really, who cares, nobody that's who. Giving yourself a complex over wondering if someone will see your diaper is in fact playing tricks on your mind telling you not to enjoy or engage in something you get great pleasure from. Ask yourself this. Am I hurting anyone wearing a diaper in public? Answer...No. Am I dressed like a baby walking around with a pacifier in my mouth? Answer...No Do I approach people and ask them to change my diaper? Answer...No. You see guys the problem is our own insecuritys about diapers. Love yourself and who you truly are and forget about what anyone thinks. Sure some people may have opinions but opinions are like assholes and everyone has one right? WHO CARES!!!! Now with that said, I woke up yesterday and decided to go to the gym wearing a diaper. I put on one of the loudest and thickest diapers I have and even stuffed it with a thick liner. I even wore a pair of sweatpants that I never wear to the gym and my padded bottom was very noticeable with the diaper outline showing from the back. The gym was crowded and I was there for over an hour. Guess what? No one said a word to me or looked at me funny. In fact I carried on several conversations with different people and it was no big deal. I then left the gym and went for coffee and then to Walmart and was there for a while. Again, no one said a word or gave any impression that they new I was wearing a diaper which could clearly be seen. This past summer I went to the grocery store and it was a fairly warm day so I made it a point to wear cargo shorts that were kinda tight fitting with a thick diaper underneath and on the way in to the store there was three ladies behind me, one ladie around 45 yrs old and two in there early 20's. I heard the older ladie say to the other two ( look girls, looks like he's wearing a diaper) The other two girls just said yes it does and we all went on our ways shopping. Later inside the store I ran into them again and they all gave me the biggest smile and said hello to me. I replied back and carried on. A few weekends ago my wife/mommy put me in a very thick nighttime diaper and we spent the day at a very big Mall in our area. After several hours my diaper leaked a bit and you could see it from the back and with all the people around no one said a word. So mommy did a quick feel check and changed me in the family restroom. So you see guys this whole diaper stigma is not a big deal unless you yourself make it one.
 

BearTale

Est. Contributor
Messages
111
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Adult Baby, Diaper Lover, Other
o_O

Exactly!! Who cares what anyone thinks. That's just how I view wearing diapers out in public. First off, no one would ever know you wearing for non medical reasons or that your ABDL let's get that straight. I feel most abdl's or just dl's put way to much pressure on themselves about someone noticing if there wearing a diaper for crying out loud! Really, who cares, nobody that's who. Giving yourself a complex over wondering if someone will see your diaper is in fact playing tricks on your mind telling you not to enjoy or engage in something you get great pleasure from. Ask yourself this. Am I hurting anyone wearing a diaper in public? Answer...No. Am I dressed like a baby walking around with a pacifier in my mouth? Answer...No Do I approach people and ask them to change my diaper? Answer...No. You see guys the problem is our own insecuritys about diapers. Love yourself and who you truly are and forget about what anyone thinks. Sure some people may have opinions but opinions are like assholes and everyone has one right? WHO CARES!!!! Now with that said, I woke up yesterday and decided to go to the gym wearing a diaper. I put on one of the loudest and thickest diapers I have and even stuffed it with a thick liner. I even wore a pair of sweatpants that I never wear to the gym and my padded bottom was very noticeable with the diaper outline showing from the back. The gym was crowded and I was there for over an hour. Guess what? No one said a word to me or looked at me funny. In fact I carried on several conversations with different people and it was no big deal. I then left the gym and went for coffee and then to Walmart and was there for a while. Again, no one said a word or gave any impression that they new I was wearing a diaper which could clearly be seen. This past summer I went to the grocery store and it was a fairly warm day so I made it a point to wear cargo shorts that were kinda tight fitting with a thick diaper underneath and on the way in to the store there was three ladies behind me, one ladie around 45 yrs old and two in there early 20's. I heard the older ladie say to the other two ( look girls, looks like he's wearing a diaper) The other two girls just said yes it does and we all went on our ways shopping. Later inside the store I ran into them again and they all gave me the biggest smile and said hello to me. I replied back and carried on. A few weekends ago my wife/mommy put me in a very thick nighttime diaper and we spent the day at a very big Mall in our area. After several hours my diaper leaked a bit and you could see it from the back and with all the people around no one said a word. So mommy did a quick feel check and changed me in the family restroom. So you see guys this whole diaper stigma is not a big deal unless you yourself make it one.
so i completely agree with you. I just want people to be happy and to be honest a lot of people on these boards are not happy with themselves. (Myself at one time included) but I wish people would come here for guidance and understanding mabye someday we wouldn’t need validation as a society for the harmless things that we do but we are the enemy to ourselves! Well said! I love all of you!! <3
 

tenderbottoms47

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You said exactly what I was thinking yesterday myself. Funny how some get it and others don't. Hopefully in time everyone will come around and be happy about themselves. Some just got there quicker I presume!
 

neophyte

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Diaper Lover, Little
I am 36 and only now do I feel confident in what I do, and I care less about what people think.

I wear a diaper for fun, I do cover up, and don't really care when I am out.

People over worry, wearing a diaper is not that noticeable unless you're wearing tights, or super tight jeans, or your 5000ml diaper is full!
 
D

Deleted member 44078

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I wish it was that simple. If my life revolved around a few close friends and family members sure I wouldn’t worry about them, but Im in front of hundreds of people a week sometimes hundreds at a time under bright lights with people taking pictures and videos and posting them publicly on social media. As my life is now I don’t see myself accepting my desire to wear 24/7.
 

Slomo

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This is a good topic. Soooo many here are driven by the fear of what if or will I be found out. First, why do you care so much even if they did? Diapers are neither illegal nor immoral. Second, 99.99% of those around us simply will not notice. That goes for wearing a thick diaper at a quiet office or on a brightly lit stage. Nobody ever notices as long as you take the appropriate steps. And that 0.01% that do notice, that's because you made it obvious. And of them, more than half might, might, make a comment then move on with their life. And as for the smallest fraction that do take offense or try to make it into an issue. Well, feel sorry for them but don't let them pull you down for a second. It's them that has the problem, not you and not you wearing a diaper.
 

DanielW

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I wish it was that simple. If my life revolved around a few close friends and family members sure I wouldn’t worry about them, but Im in front of hundreds of people a week sometimes hundreds at a time under bright lights with people taking pictures and videos and posting them publicly on social media. As my life is now I don’t see myself accepting my desire to wear 24/7.
So, if you were to suddenly become incontinent, would you simply give up your current life/career and become a recluse? I certainly hope not.
 

RubberJin

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Unfortunately there *are* plenty of idiots out there who can make people's lives hell for the most ridiculous reasons:
Self-styled vigilantes attacked the home of a hospital paediatrician after apparently confusing her professional title with the word "paedophile", it emerged yesterday.
(https://www.theguardian.com/uk/2000/aug/30/childprotection.society)

And along similar lines this was near enough to where I used to live that I would be thinking twice about how I went about in public:
https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/this-britain/unashamed-lynch-law-simmers-on-a-rundown-estate-710847.html

I actually went in a pub very near that estate and it's one of the scariest places I've ever been in, not because anything was going on but just because of the sorts of people in there, knowing that a wrong word or accidental eye contact could easily result in hospitalisation. I definitely definitely would not wear ANYTHING that in any way stood out in that place for fear of my life.
 
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