Great topic! This is something I think about often enough.
The answer is that I've known that I am a DL my entire life, for sure since I was 4 years old.
A few indicators and a bit super embarrassing.
- When I was 7 I took the diaper off my sisters doll and put it on myself to wear and pee in
- I used to put my moms maxi pads in my underwear and pee on them
- When I was 6 my best friend and I were playing out side and bored, he for whatever reason said "I can ask my mom if we can put on my younger brothers diapers"; I remember feeling excited but played it cool "ohh okay". He asked his mom, obviously she said no. I wonder to this day if he is a DL.
- I had a sleep over when I was about 8 and my friend wore diapers at night, we shared a bed. I was so excited, I kept talking about diapers and asking him questions until he got a bit firm and said why do you keep talking about diapers. In the morning I tried to steal one and knew where I would hide it but I couldn't find them in his bag.
and so on etc...
Even as an adult my mother in law dropped off a sleeve of pampers at my house, I came home and no one was there, I saw the diapers and kept looking at them and tried to think of a way to get one out to wear and pee in.
I stole some medical diapers from my neighbor a few times which was great.
The real trigger was discovering Rearz, and other ABDL diapers on Amazon about 3 months ago. It finally clicked that I could order some discretely and ship to a pick up point.
I still hide this from my wife, I keep thinking this is temporary and I just need to get it out of my system.