Yawgmoth's Top Ten Places
(
Disclaimer: All locations listed here are
technically public places. Yawgmoth does not actually advise actually going to any of these places and wearing diapers, and does not take responsibility for you doing so. Also, this list is merely for humor purposes; if you take offense to anything said in this post then please file your complaint in the nearest furnace. Also, Yawgmoth was too lazy to think of 15 places, so you'll deal/live with 10 and be happy with it.)
10. Any graveyard.
[People are not in a graveyard to stare at, or notice, your particular choice of underwear for that day. Chances are, if someone is in a graveyard, they are there to grieve.]
9. African Wild Safari.
[On the African Wild Safari adventure, tourists are exposed to a zoo-like area where visitors can drive in their own vehicles and observe the wildlife, rather than viewing animals in cages or small enclosures. The main attraction is large animals from Sub-Saharan Africa such as giraffes, lions, rhinoceros, elephants, zebras, and antelope. And with situations happening like the one below, I doubt anyone will notice your choice of underwear.]
8. Any sort of "nerd" convention. (i.e. anime, comic books, trading cards, etc...)
[The people at these places are typically not the most appealing to stare at, and thus no one actually, truly, looks at one another at these places; I know this because I am one of these nerds. With no one looking at one another, no one will be looking at you and thus you won't be noticed. Also, the HORRIBLE odor at these places will cover any added stench.]
7. The United States Congress.
[The US Congress is a place of "serious business" with far too much legislative work to pay attention to your absorbent underwear. Also, if you choose to observe congress in session, you sit way above them out of Senators' and House Members' view.]
6. Federal Court
[Did you know that any courthouse is open to the public? As a citizen, you have the right to enter any courthouse and take a seat in the courtroom and watch a trial being conducted. You sit in narrow rows and sit perfectly still and silent. Everyone in the room is focused on what's going on in front, and thus no one is in the least bit focused on you or what you're wearing.]
5. Burning Man.
[The Burning Man event is an eight-day event that takes place annually in Black Rock City in Nevada. The event is described by organizers as an experiment in community, radical self-expression, and radical self-reliance; in other words it's a bunch of weirdos/hippies doing whatever the hell they feel like. With everyone caught up doing their own thing, a person in a diaper is unlikely to be too highly noticed. And if you are noticed, you'll just be considered as doing your own thing.]
4. Ethiopia.
[Have you ever learned about Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs? Basic needs such as food, water, air, security, etc... are the base of that pyramid. The people here are too busy worrying about what they're going to eat next, or where's safe, to notice the extra padding on your butt.]
3. Antarctica.
[The world's southern-most continent is also the least populated; on average there are about 1,000 non-permanent people on Antarctica at any given time spread out over 5,405,430.2 square miles. As the coldest, driest, and windiest continent there is even further chance that you won't be noticed beside that scarce population.]
2. International Waters.
[In most nations, 13 miles off shore is considered "international waters". This area, called the "high seas", is free game for anyone. With hundreds of thousands of square miles of empty water for your vessel to float in, there's little chance your diapers will be noticed.]
1. The ISS International Space Station.
[Technically, the ISS is an international space station owned by mankind for the good of mankind. So logic would dictate that, as a member of mankind, this is sort-of a public place. Anyway, you're hundreds of miles above the rest of mankind in a tin-can, there's a far shot in hell that you'll be noticed here. Also, if you are noticed, everyone else there most likely has a diaper on too.]