What are the pros and cons of therapy for this?

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parkerpeter

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Let me start by saying I don't think being ab/dl is anything that I need to work through or cure or whatever. I understand that it is now a part of who I am, I'm at complete peace with it, and my parents and girlfriend know about it and (for the most part) are accepting of it. I say for the most part because my dad spent the better part of an hour trying to wrap his head around it and telling me that it's ot socially acceptable and it's abnormal yadda yadda bunch of stuff I already know. He suggested therapy/counseling, asking if I thought it might "help". As I've said, I don't see a need to stop wearing diapers and such, but I wondered if maybe a therapist of some sort could possibly help me discover WHY I turned out to be ab/dl. I've always sort of had a fascination with helplessness, but I'm unsure of whether there was a definitive origin to my coming into this interest. So, what are your thoughts? Would therapy or counseling of some sort be of ANY benefit whatsoever, or should I avoid it altogether?
 
parkerpeter said:
Let me start by saying I don't think being ab/dl is anything that I need to work through or cure or whatever. I understand that it is now a part of who I am, I'm at complete peace with it, and my parents and girlfriend know about it and (for the most part) are accepting of it. I say for the most part because my dad spent the better part of an hour trying to wrap his head around it and telling me that it's ot socially acceptable and it's abnormal yadda yadda bunch of stuff I already know. He suggested therapy/counseling, asking if I thought it might "help". As I've said, I don't see a need to stop wearing diapers and such, but I wondered if maybe a therapist of some sort could possibly help me discover WHY I turned out to be ab/dl. I've always sort of had a fascination with helplessness, but I'm unsure of whether there was a definitive origin to my coming into this interest. So, what are your thoughts? Would therapy or counseling of some sort be of ANY benefit whatsoever, or should I avoid it altogether?

I think a therapist can help you possibly understand it better, but not likely find out the exact reason on why. However, in most cases it will also depend on the therapist in question. With the cost of it, I wouldn't say it's worth it unless you feel you need it.
 
An introduction thread? Like, explain my situation ab/dl-wise? I could, but Idk if many would care to read it. Worth a shot, I guess.

I'm very mentally and emotionally stable in general. I haven't had a very hard life. My parents are divorced. That sucked for a while, but that's the worst thing that's happened to me. I'm a very open-minded dude, but I have my limits as to just how weird I can get without feeling self-conscious. Honestly I don't think I'd ever want or need to get rid of my little side. It's part of me and I'm fine with it, I'm just curious about the logistics of it, really.
 
If, as you say, you're at peace with it, I don't see the point of a therapist for it. I think so little is known about us that pinning down any real source, even with a professional, is unlikely. Then again, if you did learn the cause of it, what would it avail you? With intense study, you might be able to tell me why I like the toppings I do on my pizza but I don't think it would incline me to pick different ones.
 
The human psyche is pretty much the archetype of a complex system. The development of particular sexual predilections is not well understood, because there are so many potential variables - genetics, gestational environment, upbringing, diet, medical issues, socialisation, etc. Potentially, a singular experience at a critical point can have an immense impact on a the way a person's mind develops, and the effect won't be fully realised until years or even decades later. TBH, until we can construct a perfect model of a human being, which requires both a perfect understanding of genetics and gestational environment, and some way to record every single influence on a person, whether sensory or otherwise, I very much doubt we will be able to backtrack to a particular point in someone's life and say "this is what caused it". And we are a very, very long way from that. Psychiatry is not (yet) a hard science, no matter what some people may believe.

I very much doubt that a therapist can do anything except help you come to terms with your paraphilia, and by the sound of it, you don't need help with that, so it would be a waste of time and money. The psychiatric profession’s history of “curing” unusual sexual predilections is one of miserable failure (and, by modern standards, a history of more than a few human rights violations).

As for your dad, you might point out that homosexuality didn't use to be socially acceptable, nor did inter-racial marriage. Adultery is still frowned upon, even if you won't get stoned to death for it these days. Things change. And whether it's socially acceptable really isn't relevant, as like most kinks, such as BDSM, it doesn't have to be social. Unless you have some desire to walk around openly as an ABDL, it's a private matter.
 
PRO - talking about things NEARLY ALWAYS makes them better understood
CON - it costs money

Realistically, this won't BE "cured", but it can be stuffed into a box, it that's what your father wants. Tell him to quit smoking and drinking, and maybe give up his sex life, and let's see how that works out for him first... It could lead to two nervous wrecks in the same house, though, if you both give up something that gives you both such great pleasure..

Him first....

PS Therapy could help with the helplessness...
 
I'm going to say that psychiatry is something that everyone should engage with (regardless of if they have a problem or not), obviously provided that they are able to afford such a service.

Now ... this is an idea that has changed over a significant period of time. I used to be like many people on here and thought that it wouldn't be worth it. It would be too difficult to find the right person to be able to connect with. That I might find it too difficult to open up about things. However, i have seen psychiatrist for a different reason (I have had depression that was a little difficult to treat by my normal physician and wasn't really improving, seeing a psychiatrist really helped with all that).

Whilst the reason i went was definitely because of a specific problem that i had. One which is now significantly better (and i would go so far to say has no resolved despite still being on medications to make sure i stay well). However, there is more that i gained from my interactions with my psychiatrist. Now i have not yet discussed anything with regards to my ABDLism with my psychiatrist. I just felt that for me it wasn't really necessary for me as it didn't relate to my depression. But i can definitely say that overall i feel a marked improvement in my entire mental health. In aspects that i didn't intend (or realise) were issues for me.

Yes, my depression was the significant issue for me. But after seeing my psychiatrist he was able to help assist me with my overall mood and i would definitely say improved my emotional wellbeing/responsiveness. I generally am able to feel more like myself and feel that i am better at dealing with emotional situations better. There were issues with my family that he identified and is helping me to work on so that i can better deal with the way my family acts towards me. He was also there to be able to assist with my relationship and actually made me feel normal about the kind of relationship i was in (it wasn't anything bad or anything like that but i was in a relationship with someone who was older then i was).

So my opinion. If you are interested in seeing a psychiatrist and can afford to do so without stress, then i say go for it. You might be surprised what it is that you discover and are able ti improve. However, i would say don't go with the idea that you will be able to identify why you are ABDL. Psychiatry is more about potentially identifying a source so that you are able to better understand and accept yourself. The psychiatrist that i am with is not interested in "changing" who i am because there are problems.

You will need to invest a little bit of time to find someone who you can relate with. Something which can be a bit difficult.
 
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Zeek61 said:
I'm going to say that psychiatry is something that everyone should engage with (regardless of if they have a problem or not), obviously provided that they are able to afford such a service.

Now ... this is an idea that has changed over a significant period of time. I used to be like many people on here and thought that it wouldn't be worth it. It would be too difficult to find the right person to be able to connect with. That I might find it too difficult to open up about things. However, i have seen psychiatrist for a different reason (I have had depression that was a little difficult to treat by my normal physician and wasn't really improving, seeing a psychiatrist really helped with all that).

Whilst the reason i went was definitely because of a specific problem that i had. One which is now significantly better (and i would go so far to say has no resolved despite still being on medications to make sure i stay well). However, there is more that i gained from my interactions with my psychiatrist. Now i have not yet discussed anything with regards to my ABDLism with my psychiatrist. I just felt that for me it wasn't really necessary for me as it didn't relate to my depression. But i can definitely say that overall i feel a marked improvement in my entire mental health. In aspects that i didn't intend (or realise) were issues for me.

Yes, my depression was the significant issue for me. But after seeing my psychiatrist he was able to help assist me with my overall mood and i would definitely say improved my emotional wellbeing/responsiveness. I generally am able to feel more like myself and feel that i am better at dealing with emotional situations better. There were issues with my family that he identified and is helping me to work on so that i can better deal with the way my family acts towards me. He was also there to be able to assist with my relationship and actually made me feel normal about the kind of relationship i was in (it wasn't anything bad or anything like that but i was in a relationship with someone who was older then i was).

So my opinion. If you are interested in seeing a psychiatrist and can afford to do so without stress, then i say go for it. You might be surprised what it is that you discover and are able ti improve. However, i would say don't go with the idea that you will be able to identify why you are ABDL. Psychiatry is more about potentially identifying a source so that you are able to better understand and accept yourself. The psychiatrist that i am with is not interested in "changing" who i am because there are problems.

You will need to invest a little bit of time to find someone who you can relate with. Something which can be a bit difficult.

It all depends on the therapist and also the person going to see said therapist. You essentially made the connection that everyone should engage in it, by only one clear example, your own experience. With such a bold claim, I don't know, I would expect you to have better reasoning than you had a good experience.

Can everyone benefit from therapy? I am pretty sure that is the case, but is it worth the time, effort, and money? I suppose that all depends on why you would want to go in the first place. Also, even if one was to decide to go, it doesn't necessarily mean their experience will be as good as yours. Could end up quiet the opposite in fact.
 
Sounds to me like your dad just wants you to be cured when he says 'help'. Really, the only cure for this is brainwashing, which is morally wrong, at least for what most people consider as morals. Its not like there is some type of addictive substance involved in this, the need you feel literally is coming from the inner wiring of your brain, kinda hard to change that without actually wanting to stop based on personal desire, and not social desire.

If it isn't interfering with your ability to be a good boyfriend, and to function in society as an adult, then you don't actually need any more help then that. If you are looking for a source as to why you developed this way, a therapist could maybe help you figure it out, but they could never give you a definitive answer, just some ideas. Something like that is probably less important unless you are trying to work through trauma.

Is it socially acceptable, no, not yet. But many things have gone in and out of social acceptability. Homosexuality and polygamy have been socially acceptable in old societies, now homosexuality is acceptable again, however polygamy isn't in american society. I wouldn't base my personal life on social standards, but managing my social life based on social standards, can be an important thing to do.

Pro's and con's of talking about this to a therapist? Con's would be that if you get an overly conservative (usually heavily religious) therapist, you run the risk of them trying to 'fix' you to be normal. For most therapists, they generally find this lifestyle as being 'not that big of a deal'. Here are some pros:

1. Help you get self acceptance about this.
2. Help you manage a balance between your AB/DL life and your adult responsibilities.
3. Help a therapist understand you more deeply while trying to work with you on other unrelated stresses or problems in your life.
4. Help you understand and deal with the difficulty you may encounter in relationships and social contact based on your lifestyle.
5. Get people off your back by telling them you visited a therapist who said there was nothing wrong with your lifestyle.

Those are really the main reasons I can think of. If you don't think that any of them apply that much to you, then it probably isn't worth the expense of visiting a therapist. If your dad is the only one who is giving you some resistance with regard to your AB life, then it probably isn't worth going to a therapist just to get him to stop bothering you, instead, take some time of personal reflection, and research, and then stand up for yourself to him.

(edit) As Zeek61 pointed out, if you can afford a therapist, sometimes it is good to visit just because they can be helpful. Personally, I think everybody could benefit from an occasional visit to a therapist, but I guess I'm surrounded by a lot of people who hold their problems in.
 
I spent a lot of time in therapy in my college years trying to figure out my sexual orientation. The goal wasn't to change it, only to understand it...I was uncertain for many years whether I was gay, bi, or straight. I went to counseling with an unrealistic expectation that somehow talking with a therapist would lead to a flash of insight. I refused to work with therapists who tried to directly tell me what my orientation is. (It's probably good that I had this attitude, since one told me I was straight and another told me I was gay.) What I really needed to figure myself out was to stop looking within and go on some dates.

I went to counseling in my mid-20s to deal with a breakup in which my boyfriend's non-acceptance of my ABDL-hood was a factor. This counseling experience was really helpful. I'd go so far as to say that it helped me to grow a spine. If a date or a significant other said the things my mid-20s boyfriend said about ABDLs, I would not let those statements go unchallenged.

My general sense from my experiences and from what I've heard of other ABDLs' experiences is that there are some things therapy can do and there are other things therapy can't do. The probability that therapy will help you figure out how you came to be ABDL is low. The probability that it will make you stop being ABDL is zero.

On the other hand, therapy can be really helpful for dealing with relationship problems, including relationship problems relating to ABDL-hood. A counselor can give you strategies for communicating with a partner about your needs and wants, including needs and wants that are statistically uncommon. A sympathetic counselor can also help ABDLs deal with feelings of shame.
 
As other have said, no one can really figure out why, because there isn't really any common reasons. People of all backgrounds are amongst our community. There's nothing that someone can say would explain why. Since we are spread so thinly, I can't imagine that they'd have much experience. Bedwetting, younger siblings, only child, lost childhood, lost parent, and so on. There's too many variables that they would ask and eliminate.

What is the earliest memory of you wanting to wear diapers? Try to match it to one of these variables.
 
brabbit1987 said:
It all depends on the therapist and also the person going to see said therapist. You essentially made the connection that everyone should engage in it, by only one clear example, your own experience. With such a bold claim, I don't know, I would expect you to have better reasoning than you had a good experience.

Can everyone benefit from therapy? I am pretty sure that is the case, but is it worth the time, effort, and money? I suppose that all depends on why you would want to go in the first place. Also, even if one was to decide to go, it doesn't necessarily mean their experience will be as good as yours. Could end up quiet the opposite in fact.

There is part of this that i do agree with. You are right that i have had a good experience with a psychiatrist and yes, i am drawing on my own experience (which is in fact limited as not everyone is like me). However, that wasn't so much the point that i was trying to make with that. I was more trying to make the point that if you had of asked me before i engaged with a psychiatrist about whether you should see one or not i would have said that it would be a silly idea unless you actually have a problem. However, after engaging with a psychiatrist for over a year now, that opinion has significantly changed and i can see the benefit of seeing one even if you don't have any problems.

The reality is that we all of issues, sometimes ones that we aren't even aware of (or don't seem like an issue at the time). Sometimes there are issues we don't want to face. Even the happiest person in the world would still have psychological issues that they might/might not be aware of. This is where it is a good idea to engage with someone who can navigate this area and be able to look at things from a whole and provide some insight into areas that you haven't considered before. Does this mean the person has a problem? Not at all. Does this mean that they are going to be put on drugs by the psychiatrist? I would hope not, but that depends on who you see. Does this mean that they are any less of a functioning person in the modern world? Absolutely not. The reality is that we all have issues that we would rather not face or are not aware of. We function fine without having to do anything about them.

So then that begs the question ... If it isn't actually a problem why do anything about it? The old adage of "if it ain't broke then don't fix it". Unfortunately i think that that isn't a good idea to go by when it comes to psychological issues. I was perfectly fine without seeing a psychiatrist before i got depression. I even attempted to resolve it on my own (considering i have medical training and i know a good amount about depression). Was i successful in treating it. Well, yes ... to a degree. But i got a much better result when i engage with some external to my own thoughts and was able to discuss things out loud with someone.

You are also absolutely right in that my experience isn't the norm (and i will admit that even my psychiatrist considers himself to be abnormal from the majority of the other psychiatrist that are practicing as he focuses far more on me as a person then dealing with only specific issues).The hard part with the mental health field is that it has kind of shot itself in the foot with the way that it treated things in the past. The whole institutionalisation of people, forcing them to take drugs, performing harmful/dangerous/radical producers on them has certainly given them a bad reputation. But that isn't what psychiatry is about anymore.

The way i see things is that its no different with seeing a normal doctor about your health issues. You could have an extremely bad experience. It's no different than seeing a dentist and having a bad experience. In fact, its no different then finding a girlfriend/boyfriend and having a traumatic experience. Opening yourself up to someone and being vulnerable is making yourself vulnerable to a potentially bad experience. The question you need to be asking is not how do i avoid that bad experience. The question you should be asking is what would i be able to gain if this were to be a good relationship? I can guarantee you that engaging with a psychiatrist that you have a good relationship will do massive things for your overall wellbeing.

It has a little to do with something called Maslow's hierarchy of needs in my opinion. For me, before i saw a psychiatrist i was able to obviously do all the basic things, i could do the whole safety/belonging aspect (although, that changed a little bit after i saw a psychiatrist). I was able to engage in relationships and i was even able to (at some points), engage in self-actualisation. However, after seeing a psychiatrist i feel that i am better equipped to be able to do more self-actualisation then before as i was able to address issues in the other aspects that i had glossed over or was ignoring.

Yes, i know that my experience is potentially abnormal. I do know of other people that have engaged with psychologists/psychiatrist and had good experiences like i have (and equally, i have spoken with and heard stories about the bad ones as well). Out of all the people, i am probably one of the ones that was the most apprehensive about seeing a psychiatrist (talking with people in my profession that have been to one and had bad experiences was all too common for me). But i did get over that and i feel that people mistrust anyone who works in the mental health field - psychiatrists/psychologists/social workers/etc. You would actually be surprised what you might be able to gain if you do allow some vulnerability once you have built a relationship up with someone.

However, it needs to be weighed against cost. Some people just don't see the value of paying hundreds of dollars seeing a psychiatrist. i know that if you had of asked me to spend $2,000 or more on psychiatrists/psychologists i would have previously asked why you would want to if you didn't actually have a problem. But for me, i see this as an investment into my mental wellbeing. One that i have been lucky enough to be able to have a positive and valuable change in my life for. You rightly pointed out that the benefit you get only depends on the reason that you want to go. But it also depends on how you engage with the person you are seeing. So in short, i think they are very valuable and are sadly underused. Its scary, there is the potential for bad experiences but like anything we do, is this potential more than the good that can be gained? My opinion is that the good is better then the bad. But not everyone will agree with that.

Addition: Just to point out that my psychiatrist was different. I was expecting when i first went to see him that i would have to talk about my childhood and traumas and those kinds of things. The reality is that he wasn't that interested in those things. The reason why (and what he said to me) was that those things have been and gone, and there is nothing that can be done to change them. Better to work on who you are now then to try digging in the past for something that might not even be related to anything. We did discuss some aspects of my childhood later on but that was for an entirely different reason. And even when we did discuss it, he was interested in all aspects of it but was more focused and specific in what we discussed. He even said that he often finds that trying to dig in the past in someone's childhood tends to be a bit of a minefield and overall doesn't do much good. It helps to potentially explain why you are like you are but it doesn't help to fix issues that you have now.
 
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I'm coming late to this, but my two cents are much the same as others. When I was a college student, I came home for a weekend and had a psychotic break. Though I returned to college, my mom searched my room and found both diapers and gay porn. She made an appointment for me with a psychiatrist at a residential mental facility. My doctor didn't know much about infantalism and thought I'd outgrow it, which of course i didn't. Often, psychologists and others don't really understand it any better than the rest of us, and I would hazard a guess that we may understand it better than they do.

As some have said, I would go only if there were other factors playing on your mind. In my case, I was falling apart, but you aren't. Therapy is very expensive and can last for years, so if you feel okay with this, I'd pass and spend your money on something that would give you some pleasure or joy.
 
Zeek61 said:
There is part of this that i do agree with. You are right that i have had a good experience with a psychiatrist and yes, i am drawing on my own experience (which is in fact limited as not everyone is like me). However, that wasn't so much the point that i was trying to make with that. I was more trying to make the point that if you had of asked me before i engaged with a psychiatrist about whether you should see one or not i would have said that it would be a silly idea unless you actually have a problem. However, after engaging with a psychiatrist for over a year now, that opinion has significantly changed and i can see the benefit of seeing one even if you don't have any problems.

The reality is that we all of issues, sometimes ones that we aren't even aware of (or don't seem like an issue at the time). Sometimes there are issues we don't want to face. Even the happiest person in the world would still have psychological issues that they might/might not be aware of. This is where it is a good idea to engage with someone who can navigate this area and be able to look at things from a whole and provide some insight into areas that you haven't considered before. Does this mean the person has a problem? Not at all. Does this mean that they are going to be put on drugs by the psychiatrist? I would hope not, but that depends on who you see. Does this mean that they are any less of a functioning person in the modern world? Absolutely not. The reality is that we all have issues that we would rather not face or are not aware of. We function fine without having to do anything about them.

So then that begs the question ... If it isn't actually a problem why do anything about it? The old adage of "if it ain't broke then don't fix it". Unfortunately i think that that isn't a good idea to go by when it comes to psychological issues. I was perfectly fine without seeing a psychiatrist before i got depression. I even attempted to resolve it on my own (considering i have medical training and i know a good amount about depression). Was i successful in treating it. Well, yes ... to a degree. But i got a much better result when i engage with some external to my own thoughts and was able to discuss things out loud with someone.

You are also absolutely right in that my experience isn't the norm (and i will admit that even my psychiatrist considers himself to be abnormal from the majority of the other psychiatrist that are practicing as he focuses far more on me as a person then dealing with only specific issues).The hard part with the mental health field is that it has kind of shot itself in the foot with the way that it treated things in the past. The whole institutionalisation of people, forcing them to take drugs, performing harmful/dangerous/radical producers on them has certainly given them a bad reputation. But that isn't what psychiatry is about anymore.

The way i see things is that its no different with seeing a normal doctor about your health issues. You could have an extremely bad experience. It's no different than seeing a dentist and having a bad experience. In fact, its no different then finding a girlfriend/boyfriend and having a traumatic experience. Opening yourself up to someone and being vulnerable is making yourself vulnerable to a potentially bad experience. The question you need to be asking is not how do i avoid that bad experience. The question you should be asking is what would i be able to gain if this were to be a good relationship? I can guarantee you that engaging with a psychiatrist that you have a good relationship will do massive things for your overall wellbeing.

It has a little to do with something called Maslow's hierarchy of needs in my opinion. For me, before i saw a psychiatrist i was able to obviously do all the basic things, i could do the whole safety/belonging aspect (although, that changed a little bit after i saw a psychiatrist). I was able to engage in relationships and i was even able to (at some points), engage in self-actualisation. However, after seeing a psychiatrist i feel that i am better equipped to be able to do more self-actualisation then before as i was able to address issues in the other aspects that i had glossed over or was ignoring.

Yes, i know that my experience is potentially abnormal. I do know of other people that have engaged with psychologists/psychiatrist and had good experiences like i have (and equally, i have spoken with and heard stories about the bad ones as well). Out of all the people, i am probably one of the ones that was the most apprehensive about seeing a psychiatrist (talking with people in my profession that have been to one and had bad experiences was all too common for me). But i did get over that and i feel that people mistrust anyone who works in the mental health field - psychiatrists/psychologists/social workers/etc. You would actually be surprised what you might be able to gain if you do allow some vulnerability once you have built a relationship up with someone.

However, it needs to be weighed against cost. Some people just don't see the value of paying hundreds of dollars seeing a psychiatrist. i know that if you had of asked me to spend $2,000 or more on psychiatrists/psychologists i would have previously asked why you would want to if you didn't actually have a problem. But for me, i see this as an investment into my mental wellbeing. One that i have been lucky enough to be able to have a positive and valuable change in my life for. You rightly pointed out that the benefit you get only depends on the reason that you want to go. But it also depends on how you engage with the person you are seeing. So in short, i think they are very valuable and are sadly underused. Its scary, there is the potential for bad experiences but like anything we do, is this potential more than the good that can be gained? My opinion is that the good is better then the bad. But not everyone will agree with that.

This is a very .... very long post XD.

Just going to go over some things here.
The way i see things is that its no different with seeing a normal doctor about your health issues.
To me it's very different, because psychology isn't an exact science. That means, how a psychologist does things can drastically differ from one another and still not be considered wrong or right.
The other difference is some health insurance doesn't pay for going to see a psychologist other than for specific types of problems. So the cost can be extremely high for something that may not actually help you all that much.

Yes, a psychologist can help even when someone doesn't feel like they may need it, but you really are looking past the cost, time, and effort it takes. When you include all these factors, I am sorry but it's really not worth it unless you feel you really need it.

I can guarantee you that engaging with a psychiatrist that you have a good relationship will do massive things for your overall wellbeing.
You can't guarantee that. It entirely depends on the person going to see the psychiatrist. XD

But i did get over that and i feel that people mistrust anyone who works in the mental health field - psychiatrists/psychologists/social workers/etc. You would actually be surprised what you might be able to gain if you do allow some vulnerability once you have built a relationship up with someone.

Well it's not like I don't know about going to a psychologist. I have been to plenty. I am transgender afterall, so it's practically my life. So for me it isn't about mistrust, it's more about the worth. I mean . .you do realize a session can cost a hell of a lot ... right? Typically over $100 per hour, and most of the time it's not like you are going to solve anything the first time. So you may not get anything out of it till you have spent $1,000s, and that is if you are even still going.

Now of course there are cheaper out there, I think I have seen as low as $50 per session ... but you get what you pay for as the saying goes.

But ok .. if money was absolutely no concern, which to me is a complete ridiculous thought ... then sure. Everyone should go see a therapist ... why not. However, this is so unrealistic because .. to whom is money not a concern? The rich maybe.

But for me, i see this as an investment into my mental wellbeing.

I was going to say something a bit witty here, but I don't want to upset you, even if it is a joke. That is fine, and that is entirely up to you. But for other people ... you really can't expect the investment to be worth it when there isn't a problem. I can't imagine many would be ok with spending that kind of money .. on something that likely isn't going to effect them all that great of a deal.
 
Coucou!!! (in French it mean "hey you", isn't that cute? :D)

I don't know about others but I can tell you my experience.

I've been going to a psychologist for the pass year. the first 3 months I went with one to work some issues specially ADHD but I didn't feel comfortable with her so i didn't come clean about diapers. Even though from day one I didn't feel comfortable, I kept going because I didn't got the guts to tell her I was quiting her, I was kinda ashamed so I just kept on going and yes, ofcourse, she helped me with some areas such as organization and to try to finish what I started which is hard for me to do lol.

Anyways,

Then I decided to change the psychologist and try another one and this time I said to myself "let's try this one and if it doesn't feel right, just change it again.... Though I DID like her (another woman) So I kept her going and in about my third session, I encourage myself and decided to talk to her about my abdl side.
How I started my conversation?
Well right away when we salute each other, I say "I'm feeling well and motivated to talk" and right away when we sat down, I started by " ok so I would like to talk about something very important and intimate for me and is probably the most important secret that i have in my life. If you have heard about it before, good for me but if not, I hope you are open minded..... Here I go"

" since I've been a young child around 5 or 6 years old, I've been have this kind of strange attraction.................."
And I kept going by telling her the story of my life diaper/baby related.
And when I was done, I felt so so so good, like a big weight has been lifted from me. She was very professional and the first thing she said was that I was very brave what I just did, that not everyone would do it so once again I was brave and that I should be proud of who i am and feel good and trust in myself more.

She understood that it was a part of me and that I wasn't looking to quite but to learn to accept it and accept myself.

So I'm in my 6th session and we have been working mainly on my self-esteem, and self-acceptance. she doesn't really ask much about diapers really, she was asking more questions related my childhood, how school was, my family etc.
So yeah, I've been feeling more confident and confortable since then.

Here goes some tips from me :
1.When choosing your therapist, the first session should be more like a "job interview" kinda like, where YOU are the one hiring your therapist. I don't mean you are gonna ask him/her questions but juste make sure, you feel confortable with that person, if not, just change it!! Don't worry about what they may say if you don't stay with them cause its part of the first session.

2. Remember that they are professionals and that they daily deal with way way more strange things than just wanting to wear diapers.... So relax :) (plus, you are paying them to help you not to judge you)

3. Before going, read all the articles here in ADISC about understanding infantilism, why wearing diapers, etc. The articles are GREAT!
4. If you are not good at improvising or to talk fluidly or to organize your ideas while talking (like me) just write down what you want to say.


Therapies are expensive, yes, but if you can afford it or someone else is paying it for you it, GO FOR IT.
Plus you don't need to go every week. Just go according to you budget, like if you can go just once per month, that's alright. It wil give you time to practice what you spoke, etc.

5: a good and professional psychologist will not want to keep you forever but the other way around. They what you to reach your goals and reinforce your weakness and be able to walk by yourself.


Good luck!!! :)
 
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