Wearing around other people

MaleoMist

Contributor
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16
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Little
Betterdry is not your most discreet option. Something a little more subtle may be appropriate in close company with people you know. My choice for daily wear in these environments is the Tena Active Fit Maxi or Ultima, which offer good value and performance at the top end of plastic-backed medical products while being quite discreet. I'm not claiming them to be especially quiet, perhaps someone can advise on better alternatives as minimising crinkle has never been high on my list of priorities when choosing nappies. I switch to Betterdry when the extra absorbency is needed or I don't care about discretion, so it's not uncommon to run into people when wearing one. As always, no-one seems to notice.

Light figure-shaping panties are quite good at controlling both crinkle and bulges. Full-cut styles that completely cover the nappy, a couple of sizes too large so that they are not too tight anywhere, offer the best results. At home I will often just wear waterproofs without the control panties and the increase in crinkle from the nappy itself is noticeable.
Thank you! could you (or anyone) recommend a diaper that's more discreet but preferably without any patterns or less complicated patterns on the plastic? I've never been a Tena fan because of all the markings and the tabs.
 

Tundra1975

Est. Contributor
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109
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Incontinent
Maleomist......Try Seni diapers. They have a really good lineup of different capacity diapers that are all cloth covered. They are very quiet and easily concealed under normal clothes.
 

PaddedBrony

Est. Contributor
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482
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Adult Baby, Diaper Lover, Babyfur, Diaperfur
I spend a lot of time with diapered young women that wear out and about. What I've learned over the years is that people don't pay that much attention. You might think things are obvious, but it's rare that anyone has ever noticed.
Lucky! Must be nice. 🙂
 

Slomo

Est. Contributor
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6,818
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Adult Baby, Diaper Lover, Incontinent
Thank you! could you (or anyone) recommend a diaper that's more discreet but preferably without any patterns or less complicated patterns on the plastic? I've never been a Tena fan because of all the markings and the tabs.
I wear crinklz to my quiet work every day. Nobody has noticed in the 15 years I've been there. I do also wear the gary activewear pul pants over them too. They will cut down on any diaper noise much better than boxer shorts, and they will help contain any potential leaks. Also, make sure to wear a loose or relaxed fit jeans or pleated work pants. This will accomodate the bulk of the diaper and help hide it quite well.

Edit, betterdry is the same as crinklz but is all white.
 
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JOCKMAN

Est. Contributor
Messages
475
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Diaper Lover
I wear Gary PUL plastic underpants and adult training underwear over my Abena M4 or Rearz (to aid in leak prevention at the leg openings)when I travel on a plane. The noise from any diaper is not only muted but you would have to be a person that gets very close to another person wearing a diaper to hear it and even then I would question the person that asked me about wearing if they hear a sound. Who goes around listening for crinkling sounds from other people's undergarments?

Now the bulk definitely adds to the padded look but for me, and for the anonymous travelers, I could care less, and the other travelers have never even batted an eye. I suppose if someone I even knew asked me abut "being bulky down there" I would state that my particular jeans that day are a bit tight from being washed / dried from the laundry. If they questioned me further I would probably ask them why they are so interested in my body form.....that is social cueing for "let the topic go meathead".
 

Harley07

Contributor
Messages
12
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Diaper Lover, Incontinent
You perspective changes when you wear out of necessity rather than choice, in the last 2 years that I've had to wear 24/7 no one has noticed that I know of..... but i don't make it obvious either, know what I need for protection during the day and don't pad to excess....
 

Trevor

Est. Contributor
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8,521
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Adult Baby, Diaper Lover, Babyfur
You perspective changes when you wear out of necessity rather than choice, in the last 2 years that I've had to wear 24/7 no one has noticed that I know of..... but i don't make it obvious either, know what I need for protection during the day and don't pad to excess....
I suspect it's the day in, day out nature that leads to a lot of the change of mind. I don't need to wear but I've been doing it on and off for extended periods (seven months in this time). I was pretty relaxed about it in general but I found that taking a two day trip by plane took it to a new level. I was far too preoccupied with trip concerns to really worry too much about where and how I was changing. When I needed to do it, I just went into the restroom stall and did my business. I hadn't brought underwear, so unless I was going to buy some, this was all I had and I was in that sense dependent on them. I'm glad to be able to stop when I want but it was an interesting little test.
 

Harley07

Contributor
Messages
12
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Diaper Lover, Incontinent
We flew to Florida last month, I over thought it, figured I'd wear a pullup to get through TSA then change to a nighttime diaper once I got through..... i got stopped, had to explain... on the way back I just wore the nighttime diaper through TSA and had no issues....
 

neophyte

Est. Contributor
Messages
156
Age
38
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Diaper Lover
I like to wear to work a few times a week: I just ordered a black onsie from rearz, to act as an under shirt to my dress shirt. Should help with with crinklz and keep it from exposure while I sit!
 

neophyte

Est. Contributor
Messages
156
Age
38
Role
Diaper Lover
Also, I think fear gets the best of us. No one is paying attention let alone wondering if people around me them are wearing diapers. If it does look puffy then most people just assume you have a. Big butt or thighs... I wear rearz under my jeans to work and I can't even tell I'm wearing them! If I'm worried I wear a big zip up hoody sweater.
 

Slomo

Est. Contributor
Messages
6,818
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Adult Baby, Diaper Lover, Incontinent
We flew to Florida last month, I over thought it, figured I'd wear a pullup to get through TSA then change to a nighttime diaper once I got through..... i got stopped, had to explain... on the way back I just wore the nighttime diaper through TSA and had no issues....
Oh man, I've SOO been there. Being incontinent I've tried wearing a mostly dry diaper through TSA many times. Have also been unlucky enough to wear an absolutely soaked diaper though as well. I can aslo confirm there is NO relation between the two and getting extra screening. It's all about how focused you are on the wet (or even not-wet) diaper. They are trained to pick up on nervousness, so wear and/or wet through TSA as much as you are comfortable with.
 

sotexasDL

Est. Contributor
Messages
142
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Diaper Lover, Sissy
First let me say that I love wearing diapers when I'm out and around others. So awesome to be drinking a beer and conversing with others and letting the pee flow. So taboo feeling and so awesome. Second I've found that the bulge isn't at all that noticeable unless you get carried away. I wear a fairly thick 4 tape diaper and I can tell there is some puffiness but not that bad. At least nobody has ever said anything.
 

DanielW

Est. Contributor
Messages
115
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Little, Incontinent, Other, Private
Oh man, I've SOO been there. Being incontinent I've tried wearing a mostly dry diaper through TSA many times. Have also been unlucky enough to wear an absolutely soaked diaper though as well. I can aslo confirm there is NO relation between the two and getting extra screening. It's all about how focused you are on the wet (or even not-wet) diaper. They are trained to pick up on nervousness, so wear and/or wet through TSA as much as you are comfortable with.
I can agree with you 100% there, I've always just worn a wet diaper...its not going to be much drier when I come back a 2nd time. I've had one or two extra screenings, but mostly, I just breeze through as easily as anyone else.
 

ST50

Est. Contributor
Messages
1,277
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Diaper Lover, Incontinent
Oh man, I've SOO been there. Being incontinent I've tried wearing a mostly dry diaper through TSA many times. Have also been unlucky enough to wear an absolutely soaked diaper though as well. I can aslo confirm there is NO relation between the two and getting extra screening. It's all about how focused you are on the wet (or even not-wet) diaper. They are trained to pick up on nervousness, so wear and/or wet through TSA as much as you are comfortable with.
They never picked on me either and going in to Denver airport my nappy was more than a little wet.
 

Carnifex

Est. Contributor
Messages
242
Role
Diaper Lover, Incontinent
If you want to cover the crinkle of your diapers one thing that I found that works for me is to use plastic pants I am wearing some right now over an atn and I can't even hear it when I walk another thing I read but have not bothered to try is to keep a bunch of change in your pocket to cover the crinkle
 

Rob110

Est. Contributor
Messages
896
Role
Incontinent
True Betterdry diapers are not a discrete diaper but with loose fiting pants and a onesie they are hard to spot and are way less noticable then a thinner discrete diaper that has leaked :) when my incontinence first started I wore thinner diapers but quickly learned a thicker diaper worked better for me.

i guess after 4 plus years of wearing diapers 24/7 you get to a point of acceptance and no longer careing if some one notices since for the most part no one does and being able to trust your diaper to do its job and keep your pants dry in all situations makes it easier to accept thicker diapers
 

CLPP

Est. Contributor
Messages
125
Role
Diaper Lover
No one is going to have ANY clue that you're wearing diapers unless you choose to wear them under a pair of those skinny jeans. LOL! Like others have posted, YOU start checking out people's behinds when you're out shopping and YOU determine who is/isn't wearing a diaper. Good Luck!
All of us here have different strategies which is fun to read about. Part of the DL thing for me is trying out different products. My current and long time configuration of choice is a Tena Slip Maxi with two Northshore booster pads all held in place with a pair of Abena Abrifix Fitting pants or a pair of Gary PUL Activewear pants.
 

Seasonedcitizen

Est. Contributor
Messages
250
Role
Diaper Lover, Sissy
People will not be looking for diaper wearers. Leaks will give you away. Wear loose pants and change often or wear plastic pants also.
 
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