Yes I have had one for 8 years , it takes some adjustment , in the early days I would not let my aide change me or see me in a diaper, which when I look back now was comical because at the time I was paralyzed and could not tape them on, so I would have them use a ruler to measure where the tapes should go and prepare a pile of them and then I would worm my way into them when they needed changed, a lot of wasted effort and energy, because of modesty, now I don't care if I need help changing or doing whatever , that's what they are paid for , the modesty and shame filter have been disabled , even things like helping me in and out of my chair or bed used to be off limits ( that is until I tried doing it alone and ended up flat on my ass ,and they would have to come pick me up, once I even broke three ribs trying to be more independent than I should have ( broken ribs just have to hurt and heal over time , but breathing or moving even the littlest can be agony ) we are very weird when it comes to pride and modesty and asking for help, it takes a while to adjust especially if you were ever able bodied , I was a professional carer as a job , and had to learn to be cared for and about in the academy during training they always emphasized that an unprepared rescuer that becomes a victim only makes things worse, which I'd true and statistics show that happens all to often, yet when you have permanent transition from "rescuer" to "victim" surrendering that mindset is tough mental and emotional work, I suppose if it was due to age it would have been easier but when you suddenly in the prime of life have to switch rolls it's hard, in another community I mentor Aides and CNA trainees on how it feels to be on this side of the equation , and how to resolve issues with patients so that it is a win-win situation for the patient and caregiver, there are lots of caregivers who have never thought about the emotional impact that having a disability puts on a person . We never want to be or feel like a "burden" and resolving that is hard work, and sometimes we never accomplish that . It helps a lot to take each day individually , some days I can do more , and some less, but we're you are mentally changes everyday also. best thing to do with a helper of any kind is to talk to them about who you are and we're and what you have done in your life, the better the understand your life experiences, the better they can help you without stepping on your toes.
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