IncompleteDude
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This just bugs me.
I admit I have not always been the most emotionally stable person in the past, but now I like to think I am pretty strong emotionally. Very few things can make me upset, and when I do get mad, I deal with it in a controlled and calculated manner. I believe that in a crisis situation I can handle myself well.
However, I have seen many people demonstrate or admit on these forums that they are emotionally fragile, delicate or weak. By that I mean, prone to phobias, hysterics, paranoia, self-loathing, depression, crying fits, tantrums, pettiness or dependant behaviour. Now I'm all for dependency... as an indulgence from time to time, not a constant reality. It doesn't matter what I believe, reality demands that we live independently eventually, assuming we don't have such physical or mental disabilities that would prevent it.
My concern is that some people may enter into lives constantly seeking out dependence, which they rationalize because they are "emotionally fragile". This is a shameful situation, because it means you have become a leech and a parasite. Ok, maybe you have borderline personality disorder, but that still means you have get treatment and resist parasitic behaviour. Participating in such behavior without restraint is an arrogence best avoided.
The point is, you have to grow up at some point and get a backbone. Learn to be strong, even if you need a plushie to help you do that. You can't be an adult baby without the "adult" after all, and TBs will get to that point like everyone else (assuming they don't let emotional "fragility" lead to their untimely demise/suicide). Whatever you do, don't get into the trap of thinking that you are incapable on your own because of some emotional delicacy. There is always a way to shore up your weaknesses and play to your strengths.
It's just, and particularly in the TB section of the website, I see things like a massive craving for parental approval. Who gives a damn what your parents think? Learn to live on your own terms as much as you can now, because in a few years you will have no other choice. Learn to source your sense of approval from your opinion of yourself, not your fulfillment of other people's expectations. Honestly, no one should feel compelled to their parents about abdl stuff if they don't have to (e.g. been "discovered"), because it's just not parents' business.
What's more, I find myself very bothered by the idea of parents assisting their kids in their abdl adventures. The last thing I would want to do as a parent is promote dependance on me for a dependance promoting activity. It's like a double-whammy of infantilization (in the bad sense). With something like this, it's critical the parents ensure their kids participate in dependant activities from an independant frame of reference. That is, they aquire their own paraphenilia and organize their own fun within the common confines of decency and privacy. This way the kid manages the interest, not the parents, and the kid learns what it really means to be your own independant person.
The way I see it, ABDLs have access to many more ways to unwind and recompose themselves than the average person. We have the fortunate ability to tap into our childhood memories for an unending stream of positive feelings. If anything, we should be the strongest and most independent people out there. And while I know this is far from reality, I set it as a goal to work towards in lil baby steps.
I admit I have not always been the most emotionally stable person in the past, but now I like to think I am pretty strong emotionally. Very few things can make me upset, and when I do get mad, I deal with it in a controlled and calculated manner. I believe that in a crisis situation I can handle myself well.
However, I have seen many people demonstrate or admit on these forums that they are emotionally fragile, delicate or weak. By that I mean, prone to phobias, hysterics, paranoia, self-loathing, depression, crying fits, tantrums, pettiness or dependant behaviour. Now I'm all for dependency... as an indulgence from time to time, not a constant reality. It doesn't matter what I believe, reality demands that we live independently eventually, assuming we don't have such physical or mental disabilities that would prevent it.
My concern is that some people may enter into lives constantly seeking out dependence, which they rationalize because they are "emotionally fragile". This is a shameful situation, because it means you have become a leech and a parasite. Ok, maybe you have borderline personality disorder, but that still means you have get treatment and resist parasitic behaviour. Participating in such behavior without restraint is an arrogence best avoided.
The point is, you have to grow up at some point and get a backbone. Learn to be strong, even if you need a plushie to help you do that. You can't be an adult baby without the "adult" after all, and TBs will get to that point like everyone else (assuming they don't let emotional "fragility" lead to their untimely demise/suicide). Whatever you do, don't get into the trap of thinking that you are incapable on your own because of some emotional delicacy. There is always a way to shore up your weaknesses and play to your strengths.
It's just, and particularly in the TB section of the website, I see things like a massive craving for parental approval. Who gives a damn what your parents think? Learn to live on your own terms as much as you can now, because in a few years you will have no other choice. Learn to source your sense of approval from your opinion of yourself, not your fulfillment of other people's expectations. Honestly, no one should feel compelled to their parents about abdl stuff if they don't have to (e.g. been "discovered"), because it's just not parents' business.
What's more, I find myself very bothered by the idea of parents assisting their kids in their abdl adventures. The last thing I would want to do as a parent is promote dependance on me for a dependance promoting activity. It's like a double-whammy of infantilization (in the bad sense). With something like this, it's critical the parents ensure their kids participate in dependant activities from an independant frame of reference. That is, they aquire their own paraphenilia and organize their own fun within the common confines of decency and privacy. This way the kid manages the interest, not the parents, and the kid learns what it really means to be your own independant person.
The way I see it, ABDLs have access to many more ways to unwind and recompose themselves than the average person. We have the fortunate ability to tap into our childhood memories for an unending stream of positive feelings. If anything, we should be the strongest and most independent people out there. And while I know this is far from reality, I set it as a goal to work towards in lil baby steps.